Beautiful And True - Tumblr Posts
i am shrunken down and brought to the gnome world and when i attempt to assimilate to their culture I use an acorn cap as a hat and they all laugh cheerfully at my silly mistake of wearing what they use as a bowl like a cap and though this is a transgression that would have humiliated me in my human life I am instead laughing alongside them at my humorous misunderstanding
Kon has been kidnapped alongside a civilian by cultists. The civilian is really, really annoyed.
Also, it's the strangest kidnapping Kon's ever heard of.
The cultists have locked them in a room with pizza, the latest video game consoles, the most comfy bed Kon's ever sat on, the fastest wifi he's ever seen outside of something Rob made, and a button for them to request like, anything.
And Kon tested it.
He asked for a puppy.
The cultists literally handed him one less the seven minutes later.
The whole reason Kon hasn't burst out is because he's curious.
He wants to know what the hell is going on.
"So..." he turns to look at the civilian, who was clearly the actual target.
The civilian doesn't move from where he's laying on the ground and glaring at the ceiling.
"Why?" Kon asks, using one hand to motion to the room as the other one gives belly rubs to KingKon, the newly named puppy.
"Because certain assholes don't know how to take no for an answer."
Oh, well if it's a creep creeping on a teenager then Kon isn't sticking around.
"Do you mind watching my new puppy while I go beat them up? What's their name?"
The civilian turns his head to look very dubiously at Kon. Which. Rude.
Kon could beat up a creep.
Kon beats up creeps all the time.
"Pariah Dark, Tyrant of the Dead."
Okay that's a little bit of a tall order.
"Why does Pariah Dark want a teenager?"
"Because I beat him up and now he wants to adopt me, so he keeps trying to win me over."
Oh! Okay. Totally different situation.
Still weird though.
