: BUT I Am Ready To Hurt Again - Tumblr Posts
vivrant thing (jwy) | one.
—SPOTIFY PLAYLIST / SERIES MASTERLIST
—SUMMARY: after getting into a little accident, wooyoung decides to do his sister a favor by pretending to be your date at the company summer party. as soon as the night ends, wooyoung would go back to his usual routine of hanging out with his boys, keeping his distance from committed relationships and being a typical brother to jiwoo. except, the favor comes with more than what wooyoung expects and he finds you occupying his mind more than usual.
—PAIRING: jung wooyoung x f. reader
—GENRE: (18+ - minors dni) bestfriend’s brother au | fluff, angst, eventual smut
—WORD COUNT: 6.7k
—CHAPTER WARNINGS: cussing, mature language/sexually implied content, mentions of a small car accident due to texting & driving (pls do not ever do this), lots of sibling bickering (i promise they love each other ok), alcohol consumption and intoxication, mentions of toxic relationships (not oc), mentions of sickness and death in immediate family
"Are you actually fucking kidding me?!" Jiwoo yells as she heads outside to meet her brother. "Wooyoung, you had one job!"
"And I got the job done, didn't I?" Wooyoung holds the grocery bag up. "Just got into a little accident, that's all." He points to the dent on the front of her car.
"A little?! It's a huge dent! What did you do?! Mom!" Jiwoo yells as she heads back into the house. "I told you I didn't want Wooyoung driving my car!"
"Your car was already out in the driveway." Wooyoung adds, rolling his eyes as he leaves the grocery bag on the counter.
"Yeah, so ask me to move next time!"
"Stop yelling, your voice is giving me a headache. It's annoying."
"Mom! Dad!"
"Jiwoo, stop yelling." Their mom comes from out of the room, followed by their father. "You don't need to yell—"
"I do, because Wooyoung took my car and dented it!"
"What happened?" Their father asks, his hands on his hips.
"It was an accident—"
"You haven't even said sorry!"
"And I won't if you keep cutting me off and yelling." Wooyoung glares at her. "Yeah, fucking keep it up—"
"Hey!" Their father chimes in, cutting Wooyoung off. "The both of you, be quiet! I'm not going to ask again. What happened to your sister's car?"
"It was an accident." Jiwoo crosses her arms as Wooyoung repeats. "I just didn't brake in time so I gave the car in front of me a 'lil love tap."
"You were texting and driving, weren't you?"
"For the record, I responded to one text."
"Ugh." Jiwoo groans loudly. "I literally just got the car, Wooyoung!"
"Say sorry to your sister."
"Now, is that necessary? Cause I'll—"
"Jung Wooyoung." Their mother sternly calls for him, making Wooyoung let out a deep sigh.
"I'm sorry." He looks at Jiwoo.
"You make sure that car gets fixed, Wooyoung. And take care of the costs. Your sister needs her car."
"What am I supposed to drive in the meantime?! Wooyoung's car?" Jiwoo smirks at him.
"Hell no!" Wooyoung spits. "You'll probably try and crash it into a tree the first chance you get."
"You can drive our SUV until it gets fixed."
"No!" Jiwoo looks at Wooyoung. "Wooyoung can just drive me around."
"I have shit to do that isn't on your time. Take the SUV." Jiwoo groans and rolls her eyes, brushing past her brother to get ready for the party.
"You're unbelievable. Seriously, what kind of brother are you?"
"Enough! Can we finally get ready for the bbq, please? People are going to be over soon. Can't get one moment of peace in this house when you two are home." Their mom checks the time, walking off to the kitchen with a loud sigh. "I hope you got everything from the list, Wooyoung." She yells just as she's about to dig into the bag.
"Wooyoung."
"What?"
"Be a little nicer to your sister."
"She's the one always jumping to conclusions and getting all mad. I didn't purposely try to get her car wrecked. At least I'm fine and not hurt, right?" Wooyoung rolls his eyes.
"I know, and yes, thank god. But, still. All you two do is butt heads, jeez. Can't you both try and get along sometimes?"
"Whatever." Wooyoung heads up to his room, already annoyed by the fact that he has to be here with his family all up on his case about the accident. He can admit, maybe he should've paid better attention on the road. But, it's the way none of them even asked if he was okay— Jiwoo constantly whining and yelling at him, his parents getting on his ass and backing her up. His little sister was definitely the favorite, being the top student and all. Golden child. Was in band and the church choir, never really rebelled. While Wooyoung skipped a class [or the whole day], talked back to his parents, stayed out late and just.. enjoyed having fun. He had his good days, but he also had his bad days. He wasn't necessarily cold, but he wasn't going to sugarcoat shit either.
He's a stark contrast to his little sister.
So, he shouldn't be surprised that his parents are taking her side. He shouldn't be surprised they'd come to her rescue first. He shouldn't be surprised at all. He can't wait to get the fuck up outta here when the bbq is over. He'll be out as soon as the morning hits, before any of them can wake up and pester him about anything else.
You gather your hair back and secure it with a claw clip, running your cherry-flavored chapstick across your lips before pressing them together to spread it out. You check yourself in the mirror once more, not entirely crazy about your outfit for Jiwoo's family bbq today.
But, it'll do.
You had known Jiwoo since elementary school, meeting her in the 2nd grade when you sat for lunch alone and the boisterous girl joined you. She was the new girl, but she surely didn't act like it and you admired that about her. Since then, she never left your side despite your shy nature— not engaging in much in the conversation, only humming a few words or sounds in response when she ran through list of never-ending questions.
Even though her and Wooyoung were 2 years apart and very different, you felt like they were alike in many ways [which they'd deny until the very end].
That's how Jiwoo became your bestfriend. Because throughout all of life's changes, through your losses, she was your constant. She stayed, never wavered. Was your biggest support system alongside of your grandpa. Without her, you're not sure where you'd be. You owe alot of the push you've done in life to her.
yeosang: i'm downstairs!
you: cooooool, be down in a sec
*yeosang liked your message*
You check your outfit in the mirror once more, smoothing down the fabric before spraying a bit of perfume on your wrists. You press them together and rub it down your neck, down your clothes— a simple yellow floral tube top, white distressed jeans and your tore up chucks. It seemed fitting for a summer bbq; not one to wear dresses, shorts or mini skirts like that.
"Yo." Yeosang quickly scans your outfit just as you plop into the passenger seat and greet him. "You look nice."
"Thank you." You smile. "And thanks for picking me up." He reciprocates the smile, waiting for you to buckle up before driving off to Jiwoo's parents' house. From your tiny studio, it's about 25 minutes of a drive. Yeosang doesn't have to take the highway or anything, but he does have to navigate through the busy streets of the city before reaching their neighborhood. Jiwoo's parents celebrate their birthdays a day apart from each other, but it fell during the work week this year. So, they decided to throw a bbq with family and close friends on the weekend in order to be with everyone.
"What'd you do today?"
"I just went to get some groceries and bought a little gift for Jiwoo's parents. What about you?"
"Uh yeah, I just got their gift right before I picked you up." Yeosang chuckles. "Otherwise, I slept in a bit too much and by the time I knew it, half of my day was gone." You laugh.
"Yeo." You laugh. "You should really try waking up early. It's nice to get the most out of your day."
"It is, but you know what's also nice? Being under my covers." You laugh and shake your head, eyes fixed on the view through your window. The rest of the ride is comfortably silent with Yeosang's music playing in the background, especially since it isn't much of a drive. He does chime in here and there when he's reminded of random things he has to do or thinks about. Besides that, Yeosang is good at leaving you to your peace. When he pulls up to the street, he's having to park across from the house— Jiwoo's family and their close family friends already filling the spaces nearby.
"Oh! Y/N, Yeosang!" Jiwoo's mom sees you first, pulling you both into a hug before gesturing towards the kitchen. "Jiwoo is in here!" You both greet her happy birthday before following her into the chaotic scene that is the kitchen, Wooyoung quickly brushing past with a huge bowl of marinated beef in his hands and almost bumping into Jiwoo as she holds a huge pitcher filled with juice in her own.
"Wooyoung, move!" Jiwoo nudges him away and he glares at her.
"Stop! You'll make me drop this."
"What about me, butterfingers?"
"What about me, butterfingers?" He mocks her with a look before rolling his eyes and heading out to the backyard to meet his dad by the grill.
"I swear to God." She groans, before finally shifting her attention to you and Yeosang.
"Hi." You smile at her and you expect her mood to be lifted, but she continues to pout.
"Y/N, Yeo. Finally. Get me out of here. Please, let's just slip through the front door, no one will notice."
"Where's Joong? He has to come on our escape plan, too." You playfully go along with it.
"He's not here yet." She sighs.
"What's wrong?" Yeosang asks with a small chuckle. You look at Jiwoo with a slight head tilt, reading into the frustration in her eyes.
"Today is just so messy." She whines a bit, setting the pitcher down onto the main dining table. "Wooyoung's dumbass used my car and got into a little accident earlier."
"Oh, is he okay?"
"Yeah, look at him! He's the fucking same. But, you know what isn't? My car! The bumper is all dented and everything. You didn't see it walking into the house?" She lets out another frustrated groan and shakes her head. "Whatever, anyway, he's gonna make sure it gets fixed. He better."
"Was it his fault?"
"Yes." She sighs. "Texting and driving. Like an idiot."
"It'll be fine, Jiwoo. It's unfortunate, but I'm glad he's okay. I'm sure your brother will make sure it gets fixed in time." You add.
"He's so frustrating sometimes. Can't trust him with anything." You both follow her out to the backyard that is already filled with familiar faces.
"It's okay, it'll get fixed." You give her a small smile and squeeze her arm. "Let's just enjoy today, okay?" She gives you a small smile and throws her arm around you, bringing you over to one of the free couches near the back corner of the yard. Some of her family members are playing badminton on the other side of the backyard, while another cousin is playing music and has Wooyoung and his friends hovering around, conveniently close to the grill.
"Oh, Y/N. I wish I could be like you, sometimes. So much patience and grace. Things I need to be successfully related to Wooyoung."
"You have it. Just.. needs more practice." Yeosang responds, making you chuckle. You finally find her dad and greet him happy birthday before greeting the rest of her family members. You, Jiwoo and Yeosang hang around the backyard for a bit, talking about work and the upcoming summer party. You don't chime in much, nor do you want to being that it'll be your third year not attending. Luckily, at this point, Jiwoo's boyfriend, Hongjoong, walks into the backyard and starts greeting everyone before he plops himself right next to Jiwoo.
"Yo! Sorry I'm a little late." He looks at you and Yeosang. "Friends! I missed you, guys. It's nice to see your faces." You laugh.
"Hi Joong."
"Where were you? I was texting and calling you!" She pouts. "We had an escape plan ready."
"Escape plan?" Joong cocks a brow up.
"Yes, so I can get away from this mess named Wooyoung and cry to myself in peace."
"Baby, I'm sorry. I was caught up with my dad, he needed help with a few errands. The car will get fixed, okay? Glad no one was badly hurt." You smile to yourself as he kisses her on the temple. Hongjoong is a really good guy. He's perfect for Jiwoo and has a lot of patience for her. He cares for her a lot, and it's so clear you wouldn't ever second guess his feelings for her. He's selfless and would do anything for his lady without question.
You wonder what it'd be like to experience genuine true love like that. You've been in a relationship before but you couldn't exactly say it was love. Not a genuine, raw form of love, not a deep connection. Just a relationship where you learned about your partner and they learned about you, but that was far as it went. You don't remember feeling like the relationship was special, or like it was meant for you. It was more so another experience, another lesson in your book.
How does it feel to be completely, utterly, disgustingly in love and smitten with someone?
"I'll be back, I'm gonna get a drink." You mutter mid-conversation, getting up from the seat to head back into the kitchen. To your surprise, Wooyoung is there, sorting through some of the drinks set out.
"Oh, hey." Wooyoung gives you a small smile while you silently wait for him to move away from the counter where all the drinks are sitting— soda, juice and hard alcohol bottles spread across the surface. "Want me to make you something to drink?"
"Um." You softly respond. "It's alright, I was just gonna grab some juice." You point at the pitcher.
"You sure? You aren't driving anyway, right?" He points to Yeosang who is now talking to one of their cousins near the wading pool.
"Mmyeah, I came here with Yeo."
"Alright then." He smirks. "I'll make it pretty light, hm?"
"Okay." You smile sweetly at him. You've always had the sweetest smile and Wooyoung does enjoy seeing it, he won't lie. "Thank you, Wooyoung."
"Course." You twiddle with your fingers as you watch Wooyoung make a pretty concoction in a cocktail shaker, pouring in peach schnapps and cranberry juice with a dash of vodka. He transfers the drink into a fresh cup, handing it over with a smile on his face. "Wanna taste it before you go?" You sip on the drink, eyes lighting up at how good it tasted. You weren't exactly a fan of cocktails [or alcohol in general], though you wouldn't turn down a drink or two on some occasions.
"Mm, it's good!" He chuckles.
"Yeah? Kinda pulled the measurements out of my ass but I didn't put too much vodka."
"What're you doing?" Jiwoo walks into the kitchen.
"Listening to Y/N tell me how good my drink is." She looks at you with a brow cocked up.
"You don't have to lie to him." You giggle.
"It's actually good." You hand her your cup to taste the drink. She takes a good sip and nods in approval, shifting her attention to her brother.
"She wouldn't lie to me." Wooyoung winks at you.
"Can you make me one?"
"Nah. Bar's closed now. See what all that doubting does?" Wooyoung puts the lid back onto the vodka bottle before turning on his heel to walk away.
"You're a dick."
"Love you too." He says as he walks outside and returns to his bestfriend, San.
"You okay?" You ask her as she pours some juice into her cup.
"Yeah, I just came in here wondering why it was taking you so long to get juice." You laugh as you follow her back out into the backyard and to Yeosang and Hongjoong.
"Caught your bartending brother before he closed."
"Bartending brother?" Yeosang and Hongjoong both ask.
"Mm, Wooyoung made Y/N a drink and didn't even make me one." They laugh.
"Of course."
"Anyway, do you guys wanna sit at the wading pool? Dip our feet in and watch my family act a fool?"
"Sure. That sounds fun." Yeosang shrugs.
Throughout the rest of the bbq, you, Jiwoo, Hongjoong and Yeosang engage in a few other activities with her cousins besides hanging around the wading pool with her baby cousins— karaoke, some rounds of badminton, watching Jiwoo go head to head with her brother and older cousins in beer pong. From time to time, you catch Wooyoung looking over at you, giving off tiny smiles to be friendly. It isn't entirely uncommon, Wooyoung was always nice to you despite the distance. You don't talk much, but he doesn't necessarily treat you like a stranger especially after all these years.
It's a nice thing about him, their family— they're there for you.
They're there for you so much that Jiwoo comes up with the most incredible [in her terms] idea while she catches you cheering for Wooyoung during the very last round of beer pong against their cousins. It gets rowdier and rowdier, Wooyoung and his cousins yelling back and forth; their voices echoing into the sky. You try to sink behind Yeosang, jumping at the sudden cheers and random banging.
"You okay?"
"Yeah, it's just a little loud." You scrunch your nose, Yeosang throwing his arm around you to provide some kind of comfort during the round. When evening officially hits, the partying doesn't stop. If anything, it gets a little more rowdy with alcohol running through everyone's system.
"Oh, fuck!" Wooyoung says, the beer tipping out of his cup when his cousin rams into him and spilling onto your jeans.
"Jung Wooyoung!" You hear his mom yell while his dad laughs alongside of her, nudging her to let it go.
"Oh shit, Y/N. I'm so sorry." He looks at you before glaring at his cousin. "You dipshit, look at what you did!"
"Wooyoung!" Jiwoo yells, dabbing a napkin to the wet spot on your jeans.
"It's okay, Jiwoo—" You try to chime in, but your response gets drowned within the ruckus.
"It's Sebeom's fault, not mine! Why is everyone calling my name!"
"You both are idiots!" She groans, taking another napkin to your leg.
"The hell is the napkin gonna do, Jiwoo?" Wooyoung sets his cup down before gently grabbing your wrist. "Let's go dab some water on that." You silently follow behind, letting Wooyoung politely drag you into the kitchen. He's clearly drunk, fighting with the paper towel roll before he successfully peels off a few sheets and runs it under the water.
"Wooyoung, it's okay. I can always throw it in the wash."
"Still, it'll get sticky and smell like beer in the meantime." He says, crouching down and dabbing the wet towel to the spilled beer on your jeans. "I'm sorry, Y/N. You know how my family gets."
"It's alright." You watch as he pinches the edge of your jeans and tugs it outwards, widening the surface area as he continues to wipe away.
"It might look worse at first, but the water will help." He clicks his teeth. "Did it get anywhere else on you?"
"Just my left arm but it's fine—" He stands, albeit a bit wobbly at first, taking another end of the napkin to dab away at the small wet spots on your arm.
"Okay." He says, tossing the tissue away. "Better." He gives you a toothless smile. "Won't do it again."
"Thank you, Wooyoung. It's fine, it's not a big deal. Really."
"As long as I did a better job than Jiwoo." He says, leading you back out to the backyard.
"You made it worse!" Jiwoo yells.
"It gets worse before it gets better! Plus, the beer smell won't be lingering." Wooyoung scoffs. "At least Y/N is grateful for it." As soon as you've settled next to your friends, everyone begins to sing happy birthday to Wooyoung and Jiwoo's parents before digging in for more food and sharing the ginormous cake Jiwoo ordered from a mutual friend. Wooyoung brushes Jiwoo off to the side, determining that he has the best cake-cutting skills between the both of them.
"Here, Y/N. For you." Wooyoung hands you a hefty slice of cake, eyes still glazed over from the alcohol he had been drinking. You watch as he licks the icing from his thumb, shaking his head in ironic approval. "The cake is so good. Thank god Jiwoo got it right for once—"
"Wooyoung, shut up!"
"Don't start again!" Their mom yells from the other end of the table, yet the two continue to bicker. You, Hongjoong and Yeosang stay out of it and eat away at the cake, continuing to mingle with their family members for the rest of the night until Yeosang feels his social battery dying.
"You ready? We could stay if you want, though." You shake your head.
"I'm good. Let's go say bye to Jiwoo and her parents." He nods. You find Jiwoo first, talking to one of her aunts off to the side. You squeeze her wrist as a signal that you and Yeo are getting ready to leave, her eyes widening. Bottom lip poking out. Whines ready to leave her lips.
"Nooo, you're leaving me? Please take me with you." You laugh and rub her back as you pull away from the hug.
"You'll see me tomorrow. I'll be expecting you to come over."
"First thing in the morning. Leave some room in your bed." Yeosang shakes his head and turns to Hongjoong to bid him farewell.
"Make sure you bring her girlfriend home safely." Hongjoong says seriously, patting Yeosang on the back.
"Will do." He nods. You follow Yeosang out towards the front door, clinging onto his sleeve as you navigate the busy house. You almost slip out successfully until Wooyoung pauses in his steps, doing a double-take when he catches you on his way back to the backyard.
"You're leaving?" You nod, chuckling to yourself when you see him drunk-whining just like his sister. "It's early!" He whines a bit. "Were you not gonna say bye to me? I thought we were cool, Y/N."
"Bye Wooyoung." You wrap your arms around his waist as he pulls you into a rough, but tight bear hug. "Bye San." You wave at San, in which he responds with a tiny smile and wave.
"Drive safely!" He calls out before leaving. You finally get out of the house, Yeosang waiting for you by the front door. You're not even gonna lie, you are pretty exhausted already, and you're excited to get washed up to lay in bed and pick up your current read. Jiwoo's family was always fun, so lively and full of energy. They fit so well together, like they were all perfectly molded and crafted as one. They've become like your second family, and you wished you had your own you could be the same with. But, that also goes to say, their parties always leave you exhausted.
When Yeosang gets you home, you thank him for the ride and give him a hug once he's dropped you off at the door. You slowly waddle into the studio, a smile on your face when you see your bed, your nightlight— the smell of incense still lingering in the room. You quickly hop in the shower and get ready for bed, looking at the big, bright 10:27pm in white on your nightstand clock. You slip into bed, getting cozy under your sheets before grabbing your book. Jiwoo is texting you and Yeosang pictures from today, including ones of her cousins getting crazy during beer pong.
Today was fun. It's over, and it was fun.
Today is not over for Jiwoo, though.
A few of their family members linger around while Jiwoo and her mom continue to clean around the house. She orders her lazy ass brother to haul out the bags of trash to the garbage can and to clean up the remaining mess from the beer pong game out in the backyard. Once all of the cleaning as finished, Jiwoo rushes to the bathroom to beat her brother for a shower. She feels like she can finally relax, finally settle down, finally set her plan in motion—
"I need you to do me a favor." Jiwoo leans against the doorframe of Wooyoung's old room as he folds his clothes neatly into his duffle bag, grabbing a new pair of clothes to change into once he's showered.
"Depends." He mutters, not taking his eyes off of his bag.
"No, you at least owe me this." He scoffs.
"Nevermind, I need to shower. Come back to me in 3-5 business days—"
"You didn't even make me a drink earlier!
"Not my fault you doubted my bartending skills." He furrows his brows. "Plus, I already told you I was getting your car fixed."
"Great, then you can do one more favor for me." Wooyoung sighs as he turns to look at her.
"What, Jiwoo?"
"Can you be Y/N's date to our company's summer party?"
"What?" Wooyoung furrows his brows and lets out a pathetic chuckle. "You're kidding, right?"
"What's that supposed to mean? She's my bestfriend."
"Yeah, clearly. Why can't she find someone else to go with her? Like that guy you two are close with, Yeosang?"
"Um, that's weird." She furrows her brows. "That won't do. If she wanted to go with him, she would've done it a long time ago. You know her. She hasn't gone the past two years, I'm not gonna let her pass up on this one."
"So then go ask your man if he has a friend he can spare?"
"She's not gonna wanna go with any of his friends!"
"Too damn bad."
"You cleaned up her jeans like a saint earlier!"
"Because it was the right thing to do! What does that even have to do with this?!"
"Wooyoung." She whines, almost stomping her foot. Wooyoung pauses to look back up at her.
"Even if I agreed, you do know how awkward this might be, right? Not only for me, but for her, too." Wooyoung shrugs. "I know she's been your bestfriend for years but we aren't exactly close like that. We're two very different people. We can't exactly spend a whole evening together. Alone."
"I'll be there with Hongjoong."
"That's what I said. We'd be alone." Jiwoo groans.
"She'd definitely be more comfortable with you than someone else!"
"Doubt that. She's quiet and shy. Very much the opposite of me?"
"Yeah, big ass mouth."
"That can be useful." He smirks, making Jiwoo wince in disgust.
"You're so disgusting, Wooyoung. Maybe I should take this back."
"You really think she'd play along with this?"
"Yes!" Wooyoung squints his eyes.
"You didn't even tell her about this plan, did you?"
"She'll go along with it. Please. I just want her to go and have fun for once."
"Hm." He hums, deep in thought. "Nah."
"Just one night!" Wooyoung sighs.
"No."
"Wooyoung!" She pouts.
"Jiwoo, seriously. Quit."
"You owe me! I've had your back so many times, and I've never asked you for anything else out of the ordinary." He looks at Jiwoo and he actually feels a bit bad about the car situation. And it's true, even though they don't always get along, Jiwoo has always had his back and covered for him when she didn't entirely need to. She's always had his back even when he didn't really deserve it. He subtly nibbles on the inside of his cheek, letting out a deep sigh before shaking his head.
"Whatever. Tell me the details." She squeals and he quickly turns. "And by the way, this is your idea. Not mine. I'm only doing you a favor so you can stop hounding me about the car. It's one night and that's it. If she gets mad, that's all on you."
"Fine. Consider your debt paid." She gives him a small smile. "Thank you."
"What are you talking about, Jiwoo?"
"I want you to go to the party and have fun." She pouts a bit, brushing your hair away from your face. You furrow your brows at her, pushing your glasses up the bridge of your nose.
"But, parties aren't really my thing." You shrug. "And besides, I don't really have anyone to go with. I hate to say it, but I don't wanna show up alone. Everyone has dates they can bring. You have Hongjoong." You look over Jiwoo's shoulder and catch Yeosang talking to his team members at the far end of the room. He catches you looking over, flashing you a small smile before returning his attention to his coworker.
Yeosang was great, no lie. He was a good guy, everyone could see that from miles away. He was smart, diligent, kind, and the biggest team player. He started at the same time as your cohort of new hires, Jiwoo starting a couple of months beforehand. When you saw him in person, you did find him attractive. He was at a good height and well-built, black flowy hair framing his chiseled face. At first, you thought Yeosang was just being nice to you. But, slowly, he'd accompany you to the break room for coffee breaks. Bring you coffee and pastries from another shop on random mornings. Occasional outings to lunch. Until finally, he'd accompany you to casual dinners where it felt a little too serious to be considered casual— you just didn't wanna dwell on it. Too shy to say anything or bring it up because your brain goes on overdrive and makes you think you're reading into this more than you should.
He was just your friend, being your friend. So you'd like to think.
You weren't really sure what you wanted out of this, but at this moment in time, you felt like Yeosang was good enough as that. If people found out you weren't entirely into him, they'd probably think you're crazy. And you probably are, but as much as you appreciate Yeosang's company and his kindness, you fear you'd be forcing yourself into something with him.
That's not what you think Yeosang deserves.
If anything were to develop, you'd like it to develop naturally. It hasn't yet, so maybe this was a sign that you two were actually better off as friends? You're not good at this whole dating thing, reading into signs and signals.
"I know you don't really wanna go with him either."
"It's not that. I just feel like it'd be awkward and I'd ruin our friendship. It'd feel way too forced for me."
"Y/N, you're gonna have to tell him sooner or later." You shake your head. "Then?"
"Then, I don't know. I just don't know about him. That's why I'm perfectly fine staying home and being away from all of that."
"What if my brother goes with you?" Your eyes widen.
"W-Wooyoung?" She nods. "No, Jiwoo. Is this what this is all about?"
"Look, don't get mad, okay? Just hear me out." You cross your arms as she lets out a breath. "I asked my brother to accompany you to the party and he agreed to go."
"What?!" You say a bit louder than expected. "Is it because he feels bad for me?"
"No! Shh!" Jiwoo furrows her brows at you. "I mean, he also owes me, but—"
"Jiwoo, I'm not a charity case!" You harshly whisper.
"I know, I know! You aren't. I just really want you to go." Truthfully, if this were any other person or circumstance, you'd probably feel a little hurt [even with good intentions]. You'd certainly feel like a charity case, and you'd feel sorry for yourself; especially for having to be set up in this way.
But, you're surprisingly not all that hurt by it.
Again, you know Jiwoo has good intentions and she would never do anything to intentionally hurt you. She does have a point— you haven't really gone to any of the big summer parties. You didn't mind it, but now that you think about it, you feel like you can't hide forever. The feeling of missing out settles in the pit of your stomach, and it's awful.
You're probably the only person who ducks out on these things. You're the one to blame for choosing not to be involved and for shielding yourself away from people, any inconvenience, etc. Shielding yourself away from fun, happiness. Life doing its thing.
"Mm yeah." You look at her. "I'm not close to your bother like that, though." It's true despite how he can be in person. Although you and Jiwoo were glued to the hip growing up, Wooyoung had his own group of friends and didn't pay much attention to you and his little sister. You both knew the basics about each other, have gone on trips together, tagged along with Wooyoung when he was the only means of transportation for you and Jiwoo. Why would he be worried about you, anyway? You two were busy fangirling over B2K, young Heath Ledger in 10 Things I Hate About You and Sean Patrick Thomas in Save the Last Dance, screaming at the top of your lungs whenever your favorite songs came on and shopping for hours at the same mall almost every weekend.
Not exactly Wooyoung's cup of tea.
Wooyoung was always rough-housing with his friends or going on casual 'dates' with different girls, blasting his 90s music in his room [like Vivrant Thing by Q-Tip, it's his fave] that'd shake Jiwoo's walls and drive her crazy. He had a few relationships that always ended up crazy toxic and you've seen the girls crying over him on their doorstep or throwing shit at his window to grab his attention after days of no communication. Despite that, he's not entirely a bad brother. He did his best to support Jiwoo throughout all her milestones in life, never missing an important event or being there for her when she needed her brother more than anyone else. They bicker and fight. A lot. But, they'd be there for each other in a heartbeat if needed. No question.
"You are, enough! You know he's full of himself and gross." You give her a look.
"Okay, really? That's supposed to make this better?"
"Sorry, kidding. Just my defense mechanism as his sister." She crosses her arms and sighs. "But, Wooyoung isn't exactly a stranger. And knowing my brother, he'd lead the entire time. Just let him accompany you to the party and call it a night! At least you'll be there with me and we can have fun together."
"You're gonna be busy with Hongjoong." You slowly walk back to your desk.
"I'm not. At least not entirely."
"Jiwoo." You look at her.
"I won't be too busy with him! I promise." Jiwoo looks at the date on your computer. "It's up to you, Wooyoung already agreed. But, today's the last day to RSVP."
"I feel bad, I told Yeosang I wasn't going."
"This isn't entirely how I'd go about things but hey, he'll see you with my brother. Maybe that'll initiate a talk, and you can tell him you don't want to ruin your friendship."
"Mm." You hum and pull up the email with the RSVP button, not really trying to think about the whole thing too deeply. "I don't have anything to wear."
"It's fine, we'll go shopping soon! We have some time before the party." She softly squeals as she watches you type away and send off your RSVP.
"Jiwoo, I don't know how to get ready for these things. I can't even do my hair and makeup properly."
"Babe. I will help you get this sorted out. Don't even worry. We're gonna have fun! It'll be good. I'm just happy you're finally coming." You give her a small smile.
"I hope it'll be good." Your bottom lip slightly pokes out. "Am I supposed to text your brother and thank him?"
"No. Don't worry about him."
"He's accompanying me to the party, of course—"
"Seriously, don't. It'll be fine. I promise."
"Papa?" You gently open the door and walk in, setting your shoes aside.
"Is that my girl?" Your grandfather comes from around the kitchen, holding two small bowls of rice in his hand. "You made it in time for dinner!"
"I can never miss dinner with you." You giggle, stepping out of your shoes and placing your things down before taking your place at the table. "How was your day today, papa?"
"Good." He sits in front of you with a smile.
"Did you exercise like you promised?"
"Yes." He gives you a look, making you chuckle. Your grandfather was 77 years old and still active, still healthy as can be. When you moved out, you made him promise he'd continue his exercise regimen and that he'd continue to keep himself healthy with wholesome foods. Reading. Going out and exploring the town. After all these years, he's the only one who has taken care of you well— having lost your mom and dad at an early age due to illnesses, same thing with your grandma. Despite the adversity, your grandpa made sure to put you first even if he was hurting, if he was tired, if he was stressed. He never took that out on you. He never made you feel like you were a burden, or like there was love lacking under his roof.
It was time for you to do the same.
"Good."
"How was the bbq?"
"Good! It was fun. Loud. Chaotic. Per usual at the Jung household." He laughs.
"Sounds like you had a good time." You nod. "How about work?"
"It was okay. It was pretty busy at first, but eventually settled." You avoid contact, digging into your rice when you grab a piece of samgyeopsal sitting in front of you. He watches you closely, seeing how you've gotten quieter in the last few minutes, signaling you were hiding something.
"Did else happen today that's making you watch the rice in your bowl?" You give off a tiny laugh and shake your head.
"Mm, well. Jiwoo convinced me to go to the summer party."
"You're going?" He smiles from ear to ear, happy to hear that you're finally going to enjoy yourself at the summer party you always avoided. He never forced you to do things outside of your comfort zone, but he did wish you'd go and enjoy yourself from time to time. Be happy. Have fun. "Good, I'm happy you're going! Is Jiwoo going with Hongjoong?"
"Mhm!"
"Then.." Papa looks at you with a small smirk. "Are you going with Yeosang?" You shake your head.
"N-no."
"No?" He looks at you, surprised. You've definitely talked to your grandfather about Yeosang and how you were feeling about everything. Even then, he was still surprised you weren't going together as friends.
"I'm going with Wooyoung."
"Jiwoo's brother?" You nod.
"Papa, it's kinda stupid. The way everything happened and how I ended up going."
"Nothing is stupid. Try me. How did you end up with Wooyoung as your date?"
"Well, now I'm gonna sound like a charity case."
"You are not." You give your grandpa a look before stuffing your face with more rice and pork.
"Wooyoung got into a little accident while using Jiwoo's car."
"Is he alright?" You nod.
"Yes, he's okay. Jiwoo is having him cover the car.. but also slipped in another favor." You shyly look up as you continue to nibble on your food, and your grandpa laughs.
"Ah, and that favor is the party, I'm assuming."
"Yeah. It's silly."
"It's not. She's coming from a good place and just wants you there. The whole car thing is unfortunate but for her, seems to be the right stroke of luck to get her bestfriend at the summer party." You giggle.
"I guess you could say that." You sigh. "I'm just worried about Yeosang. I told him I wasn't going and I'm not sure I will."
"You'll just show up with Wooyoung?" You shrug.
"I don't know how to do these things, Papa. I don't wanna hurt him, but I really can't see myself being his date or taking this further. I don't know what to say or how to say it yet."
"Eventually, you're gonna have to, you know that, right? For the sake of your friendship. He seems like a great guy, and I'm sure he'll understand whatever the case is, Y/N."
"I know." You shake your head. "I will. But, not now." Papa nods quietly before eating another spoonful.
"It'll turn out fine, okay? Don't worry about it too much."
"Thank you." You softly smile.
"Anyways, back to Wooyoung—" He pauses to eat some more. "It's not the most common way to find a date. But, weirdly, I'm glad it happened this way. I want you to go and have fun." You silently look at him. "Life doesn't slow down, you don't get any younger. Take the opportunities no matter how silly it may sound at first. Make more memories."
"I know. I'm just.. I feel awful that Wooyoung even has to go with me. He's probably going to have the worst time."
"Don't say that. He's going with you and the both of you will have fun. Let yourself have fun. Plus, it's Wooyoung. You know him. I'm sure he'll do what he can to make sure you are comfortable."
"I guess so."
"Enjoy, and have fun. Don't worry about anything, promise me that?"
"I'll try."
"That's all I can ask for." Because all he wanted was to see you happy. Genuinely happy in your own skin. Enjoying yourself. Having fun.
All he wanted was to see you smile over life again.
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