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Like a Schoolboy

Summary: Dimitri and Hoppers niece are a thing. Hopper finds out.

Wordcount: 1.335

Warnings: use of (y/n), fluff

"And this is my niece (y/n)."

Dimitri had blamed it then on the stress of the last few weeks. He hadn't given it a second thought. A survival instinct of the body. After all, he had expected to die not just once in the past few weeks.

A reproductive instinct. That was all it was, why he was immediately attracted to this much younger creature.

It probably wasn't even that far from the truth, but it just wasn't the whole truth either.

(Y/n) Hopper had done it to him. First purely out of physical attraction. Later for other reasons.

He had met her. He had seen the stubbornness in her. The same as in Hopper, only better hidden. Had recognized her intelligence. Not so hidden as in Hopper. He had found kindness and tenderness, as well as strength.

She had helped him settle into this new world. She had been a friend to him. She had even given him a home. Hopper's place had gotten crowded, when Joyce and the kids moved in, so Dimitri had ended up at (Y/n)s place.

And now Dimitri was laying here in this soft bed with her by his side, wondering how it had actually come to this.

He pulled his arm tighter around her and buried his face lazily in her hair. Breathed in her scent. He wasn't keen on the day Hopper would find out about them both. He wanted to never leave this little bubble of secrecy. He wanted to dwell in this unpolluted world of affection and infatuation. Only with her. No one else to disturb them. A little peace and quiet.

But he especially didn't want to get up.

"Not yet." he grumbled, trying to keep her from leaving the bed where he wrapped his arms tighter around her.

She laughed. "I have to go to class."

"Don't have to."

"I don't think my professor feels that way."

He grumbled. "He's an idiot anyway."

"Dimitri." she sighed with a laugh.

He pulled her close once more and breathed in her scent before letting go.

"Aren't you helping Hopper today anyway?" she asked, standing up.

He grumbled into his pillow in agreement, as he watched her get dressed with one eye. He grinned sleepily at the sight of the bruise on her shoulder.

"I thought you enjoyed beating up the rookie cops.", she grinned, tossing him one of his shirts. It hit him square in the face. He didn't bother to pull it off his head.

He grumbled. "I just get to explain.", he spoke through the cotton.

"About that jackass last time?"

"Da."

Dimitri didn't really need to prove to this greenhorn that he had no idea, but he had seen fit to bring him back down to earth. He was helping Hopper teach the new police students hand-to-hand combat techniques. The greenhorn was strutting around like a puffed-up rooster.

But with a broken jaw, it was hard to talk.

"It would have been different in Russia."

He felt the mattress beside him lower. The shirt was brushed off his face. (Y/n) smiled at him. "America takes the fun out of everything.", she grinned, brushing his hair out of his forehead.

He leaned slightly toward her touch. Enjoyed the tenderness.

"Come on. Get up."

"What do I get in return?"

She kissed him on the tip of his nose.

"Not very convincing.", he murmured with a smile. She grinned back and kissed him on the forehead.

"Colder."

A kiss on the cheek.

"A little warmer."

He reached for her face and pulled it to him. Kissed her on the lips without haste. Just her and him and-

"Dimitri get your ass out here!"

-Hopper.

He dropped his head into the pillow with an annoyed groan. There was an emphatic pounding on the apartment door.

"I'll get it!", laughed (Y/n).

Dimitri pulled his T-shirt over his head as he also heard Hopper walking down the hall. Dimitri had barely fished his underpants off the floor and put them on when Hopper was suddenly standing in front of him.

Time stood still for a few seconds. Hopper stared at him. Dimitri stared back. The waistband of his underpants still in his hands.

"What are you doing here?" asked Hopper tensely.

"I... live here.", Dimitri answered dryly.

"What are you doing in my niece's bed?" he now asked again.

(Y/n) stood uncertainly in the doorway."The folding sofa is broken. Doesn't extend right anymore, you know..."

Hopper turned his face to her angrily. She put on an unconvincing smile.

It didn't help anyway. No one who saw this room could even draw wrong conclusions.

The sheets were rumpled. So were Dimitri and (y/n). Their clothes lay scattered on the floor and Dimitri knew for a fact that he had at least two dark spots on his neck. His little vampire had taken hold again.

Dimitri stood up with a sigh. "Go ahead. Hit it."

No moment he had uttered the words, his friend's hook threw him back onto the bed.

"Uncle!" he heard (Y/n) exclaim.

"She's my niece!" roared Hopper, throwing another punch.

"I know!" groaned Dimitri.

"Uncle!"

"You're my age!" Punch.

"I know."

"You touched her." Punch.

"Yeah."

"You fucking-"

"UNCLE!"

Dimitri saw (Y/n) clinging to Hoppers arm, trying to stop him.

"(Y/n) he did-" Hopper began, but was interrupted by (Y/n).

"Didn't do anything I wouldn't have let him do!"

"That's not the point!"

(Y/n) looked at him wearily. "Stop hitting him."

"No!"

"Let us settle this.", Dimitri interjected, smiling at her as best as his face would allow.

"By beating each other to a pulp?"

"Is the Russian way." he shrugged. "Gotta get it all out once. Deserved it."

(Y/n) stood in front of the bed and pinched the root of her nose. "Fine. I'm off to college." She reached for her bag. "When I come back, he better just have a few bruises or I swear to you BOTH, that Russian prison was shit compared to what I'm doing to you."

She gave Dimitri a hard kiss on the forehead and punched Hopper on the shoulder before whistling out of the room.

They both looked after her.

"Your niece is really something."

"Yes she is.", Hopper agreed with him.

Dimitri looked toward the bedroom door with a smile as the next punch hit him. "She's twenty years younger!"

"I know."

When (Y/n) came back that afternoon, both men were sitting on the supposedly broken folding sofa.

Both were holding a beer. Dimitri had a package of frozen peas pressed on his forehead.

"I don't know. Somehow it all started there.", Dimitri said, taking a sip from his beer bottle.

"What started?" asked Hopper.

"That I really fell in love with her.", he sighed.

"In love, huh?"

"Like a schoolboy."

"Women... Do with you what they want."

"True words."

They both toasted to each other, when they noticed (Y/n).

(Y/n) tossed Dimitri a tube of salve. "For the bruises.", she explained.

He reached for the small tube and looked at it closely.

"Are you guys done?"

Hopper held up his bottle. "Reconciliation beer." He excreted the rest and set the can down. "I've got to go anyway. It's waffle night.", he declared and left, not without hugging (Y/n) once more.

"Waffle night?" asked Dimirti.

"Eleven loves waffles more than anything. It's kind of her thing.", (Y/n) explained, reaching for the small tube. She squeezed some of the translucent mass onto her fingers and leaned over him. He dropped his head against the back of the sofa and closed his eyes. (Y/n) tenderly spread the ointment on the bruises. Dimitri heaved a sigh at the cool sensation.

"In love, huh?" asked (Y/n) into the silence.

"Like a schoolboy.", Dmitri confirmed without looking at her.

(Y/n) smiled and kissed him softly on his bruised lips. "Love you too. You stubborn, Russian idiot."

"Your stubborn Russian idiot."