He Who Was Found In Chains Set Free - Tumblr Posts
He who was found in chains, set free. | XI
A/N:Sorry for the delay in chapters life has gotten very busy screams;; this is a shorter chapter, kind of a filler? But the episode this was based off (S4E7) is a rather slow one to begin with, so I figured I'd take the time to describe their heart break and the realization of love. I hope you enjoy it all the same, next chapter will start picking up the pace with action, maybe a bit of romance? We'll see!
You can read on Ao3 here!
You were scared to go outside. You were scared to leave the castle, scared to even leave your room. The confidence, the smiling, living freely-everything was ripped from you in an instant. And worse of all you weren’t sure if you even wanted to see Alucard or not. On one hand, you were furious, furious that he left you for so long and came back with the devil himself. The man that tortured you, abused you, belittled you. You’ve never felt so betrayed like this-never thought you could feel so betrayed. But it felt like Alucard had no regard for you or your life the way he had been acting (how could he act a specific way? He abandoned you.) You had locked yourself away in the room, the townspeople forgetting you even existed. You’re scurry along the edges of the halls whenever you needed even just a slice of bread to get you through the next few days. You remembered the days of never eating real meals. You could go back to it just as quickly, eating for survival and not for enjoyment. Alucard hadn’t seen you in days. Every time he thought he could grab a hold of you, you’d go back to the room with a small click of the lock and ignored all his calls through the door. You were rotting away in there, and he must have known it was his own fault. He broke your trust, and you must hate him.
You were grateful for the bathroom being a part of the suite, as you have no idea how you’d be able to avoid people for as long as you have. Even so, you barely had the energy to bathe, periodically doing so just to make sure you really weren’t rotting away. The curtains were closed, shutting away the light. Oh, how your heart felt torn to pieces. Slowly, Alucard had put you back together, helping you find your own voice, find things you love. You found your smile, if only just for the first time in your entire existence. He helped you learn, taught you so much about the world, and how it was kind and forgiving. You found yourself, learning more about yourself and your ancestry. You were a witch! And you would be a good one! Now, you didn’t even have the energy to read, let alone study on the craft. Laying in bed felt like laying in your casket. Limbs cold, bleary vision, ready to just waste away.
But, oh, being away from Adrian hurt more than the betrayal. Every time he knocked on your door, your heart broke. Each call out to you, saying your name so softly, hearing him beg for you to just open the door, just let him see you, just let him apologize--you’d go to the bathroom and close the door, crying in the tub just so that he doesn’t hear you. But you couldn’t help but sob, crying into your hands with a head so heavy. He’d still hear you anyways, his hearing so sharp he can catch almost anything. It destroyed him, knowing that he was the cause of all this pain. Not realizing that you cried so terribly because you wanted more than anything in the world to hold him, to be surrounded and overwhelmed by him and only him. Once, you really thought about opening the door. He’d brought you food, like he did almost every day, hoping you’d eat. Sometimes he’d leave it at your door and leave you be for a few hours until returning with the food still untouched. You wondered what the townspeople have been doing to the castle. You hear the children sometimes outside. You wonder if Adrian is with them, making them laugh. You wonder if he’s with her. With Greta. You wonder if he smiles at her like he used to smile at you. You wonder if he thinks about you when she’s around. You wonder if one day he’s just going to rip the door off its hinges and throw you out to the wolves for all your troubles and burdens. You wonder if he’ll do worse; stop coming around altogether and let you rot and fester until death takes you in this room.
And then you can’t help but cry some more, because oh, you realize this is what love is. And that you love Alucard. You love Adrian Tepes. And love hurts.
-
“I’ve left food for you, please, you need to eat.” He murmured against the door, again, and ventured off into the castle. These days he had no energy to do much, forcing himself to work on helping the village. It’s been hard, without you around. He knows it’s his own fault. He knows he deserves this. He tries not to think too much on it, for he’ll spiral out of control in misery. He’d found himself on the peak of his castle, overlooking the land and listening to the laughter of children. He looked down, seeing them all waving up to him, “hm..”
Alucard jumped.
The children looked on, terrified of the man falling to his seeming doom before stopping only a few feet above them. “Boo.”
The shock turned into laughter, the children giggling before running away probably to tell others of what they just saw. He smiled.
“That was nice of you.” Greta came into view, Alucard looking bashful that he was perceived. “I didn’t realize anyone was watching.”
“I was looking for you. Imagine my surprise when you dropped out of the sky and frightened a year’s growth out of the little bastards.”
Alucard sighed, looking away from her, guilt painted on his features. “Sorry.”
“No, really. It was nice of you. They don’t all have an adult who’ll pay any attention at all to them.”
“Let alone plummet down on them like death from above, I suppose.”
“You gave them a story they’ll be telling forever.”
-
“I wanted to talk to you about defenses, and I wanted to ask about your food supplies.” Alucard sighed, looked at the entrance of his castle that he now faced. “I’m not sure there’s much.” He really had no idea, saying as he was really only cooking for two--well, one. Now. and he didn’t keep much else around.
“Well that’s the thing. I was hoping we could use some of the dried meat you have to make meals go a little further?”
“Use it all.”
“Seriously?”
“Whatever you can find. I tended to forage fresh food in the mornings, but I’m sure I have some preserved things in the pantries.” To be honest, Alucard was only half paying attention to the conversation, eyes always drifting up to your window. Hoping, praying that one day he’d catch it open, that one day the curtain would even be slightly to the side bringing it some sunlight. That he’d be able to catch just a glimpse of your face.
“You don’t actually know what you’ve got in your castle, do you?” Greta’s voice brought him back, and he really wished it hadn’t. “Not really.” He shrugged.
“It looks like you were feeding an army in there up until a couple of months ago.”
Well....
“It wasn’t me. But I take your point. I’ve been...preoccupied. Beyond clearing up some damage from...let’s talk about something else. Defenses” He thought of all the times he could have spent cleaning up debris, or taking inventory of what was actually left in the castle, talking with you. Spending time with you. Learning your intricacies, the little nuances and ticks that you do when you’re trying to learn something new, or when you’re cooking, or when you’re explaining a new dish that you’ve always wanted to try and he was finally able to grab the proper ingredients for you.
He’s been preoccupied, letting you take over all the time in the world.
“I mean, I hope just closing your castle doors will keep people away, but...”
Greta sighed, looking towards her people.
“..We’re going to start losing the light soon. Let me show you where the weapons are kept..and then we’ll look at the outside.”
-
Alucard continued to throw himself into working with the townspeople, working with Greta to make sure their defenses were up. That they felt safe. And when the night came, the last remaining ounces of people he would have until the predictable fighting began, he thought of you. He wondered if you’d ever forgive him for the treachery he committed. The nightmares that he brought to your home. Alucard could never just think it his castle again. You were the light that shone down on him, showing him the good in people again. Teaching him that he can be kind, and forgiving, and patient. You showed him how to love learning about the unknown again. Your very existence permeated through the cracks of the walls, an existence he yearned for more and more with each passing second.
He missed you. He missed you more than he missed the ghost of his father, hell he might even miss you more than he missed his mother. And you were only a wall away, and yet it might as well be galaxies and oceans between you. He should have done more, should have done better after bringing you to your room to rest.
Adrian lifted you from the ground, holding onto you like you were the single most precious being in existence. You sobbed into his chest, nails sinking into his skin as he walked towards the castle. He whispered sweet nothings to you, hoping to calm your torments. But it all fell on deaf ears, you just wanted to be back inside.
As he approached the doors Greta had confronted him about the man who had just run into the forest without an explanation as to what happened. Alucard scowled, pressing you closer to his chest. “You’d do well to kill him should he ever rear his ugly head around here again. I’ll be less forgiving.”
“And why would I do that?”
He didn’t want to have this conversation with you here. He also didn’t feel right talking about your past at all. It wasn’t anyone else’s business. He turned away and proceeded to walk away from the confrontation, leaving with “Should I ever see him again, his body is the next on the stakes in front of my castle.”
He shouldn’t have left you alone. He shouldn’t have said that he had important matters to attend to. There was nothing more important than you. He should have stayed with you, and held you as you slept, and begged for your forgiveness when you woke up. But he left, and his heart felt like stone weighing him down to the core of the Earth. Alucard sat in his study, head heavy in his hands as he wept, tears dripping in splatters on the cold hardwood. It was hard to breathe.
And then he wept more, because oh, he realized this is what love is. And that he loves you. And that he’ll only ever love you.
And love hurts.