He Will Be Ok He's Just Emotional & Feeling Clingy Right Now. - Tumblr Posts

2 years ago

🪐 — EDWARD TEACH  for  stede ! 

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he hasn’t been avoiding stede all day,   not exactly.  not by choice,  at least.  it’s just that they haven’t managed to get a quiet moment to themselves in what feels like entirely too long,  and they’re both still trying to navigate their newfound relationship in the wake of stede’s return  —  while having to deal with the consequences of edward’s broken hearted rampage on top of that.  it has been a messy ordeal from all sides,  obviously.  it still kind of is,  because although it’s getting better the process is slow and the road not void of obstacles.

edward waits until it’s nearly sunset,  with the rest of the crew long gone to find some well earned merriment across nassau,  before securing a hold on stede’s hand and all but dragging him towards his restored quarters on the revenge.  contrary to this behavior,  however,  he halts his movements once they are inside.   ❛  hey.  ❜   back to the door,  edward slants a sheepish look stede’s way.  he is wearing his leather trousers,  but his torso is covered by one of stede’s white linen shirts  (   taken from the untouched secret wardrobe,  of course   ),  and his lips are upturned,  albeit tentatively.  as if he’s learning how to do this all over again.  how to be around stede again,  without either clawing at his clothes as if he’s afraid the man might disappear any second,  or arguing it through until he is exhausted and apologies fall from his lips like rain drops,  heavy and desperate.

❛  c'mere.  ❜   he takes him to the couch,  hand still linked with his own.   ❛  there’s some serious stuff i need to tell you.  promise you won't  —  you can’t stop me until i’m done,  alright?  ❜   he waits for confirmation,  and the next words out of his mouth come quieter,  stifled.  he’s very much trying to find a way to make stede understand what’s going on in his mind.  and trying not to hurt him in the process,  too.

❛  i need to go away for a while.  on my own.  i’m thinking about taking the queen anne and just enough men to make sure she doesn’t fall apart on me.  it’s been a while,  so i’m gonna have to check that she’s ready for open sea again,  but it’s not  —  you’ve done nothing wrong,  i need you to believe me on that.  i said you made me happy,  an’ you still do.  ❜   edward frees him of his grasp at last, only to cradle stede’s face with both hands. he does nothing but brush his thumbs across stede’s skin for a while, hoping to provide more reassurance this way, but he grows restless before long and a concerned frown makes an appearance on his forehead.   ❛  stede?  talk to me,  love.  ❜

     THE CREW GONE ASHORE  served twofold purposes : both to bring the men’s morale up with a well-deserved break,  &  to give edward  &  himself some proper time alone aboard the revenge for the first time since stede had finally caught up to him. it was still not as it had been before between them  —  &  perhaps it never would be again  —  but it was shifting into something else now, something more honest.  &  stede is eager to move past the pain, to make his amends  &  let time do its work healing the wounds they had all caused.                         there are nerves that prickle to life low in his gut when edward finds him at sunset  —  a vision to behold in both leather  &  linen  —  &  pulls him toward their quarters, the door falling decisively closed behind them. stede doesn’t know what’s coming next for them, but he trusts ed. with his life, he trusts him. but edward doesn’t lean in to kiss him, doesn’t try to touch him, aside from where their fingers are entwined.  ( he still hasn’t, not since that first night he’d been back,  &  stede honestly can’t decide if he’s grateful or disappointed for his hesitance. )  instead, edward leads him by the hand to the sofa, sits them there together  &  makes stede agree to listen to whatever it is he has to say.  serious stuff.  &  the butterflies in his stomach suddenly turn sharp, fear warning him that this is the moment ed leaves him after all. but still he nods, his eyes locked onto his beloved’s face. no matter what he has to say, stede will face it.  &  his eyes are steady, though he cannot entirely stop his hand from curling tighter around edward’s when he begins to speak.       need to go away for awhile.  taking the queen anne.  ready for open sea again.  stede hears the important parts, but some of the words in between come a bit muffled through the sudden rush of blood in his ears, his heart pounding violently in his chest. stede feels his lip quiver. he can’t keep his promise ; he can’t face this.  &  his head drops, eyes falling to hide how saltwater wells in their corners. but there are other words, too.  done nothing wrong.  made me happy.  you still do.  &  stede clings to them as debris in a storm, repeats them to himself a few times, hoping they are enough to keep himself from breaking apart.                                        he has to choke back a soft whimper when edward takes his hands away, but they return quickly to cup his face instead. his fingers are strong yet gentle, thumb tracing over his cheek. it feels nice,  &  stede lets himself lean into the touch. just in case it’s taken away, he wants to remember this feeling.  but it’s the gentle way that edward says his name, calls him love  that finally calls him back, watery eyes fluttering open.  ❝ i’m —  i’m here. still here. ❞  they both are.  &  stede forces himself to draw a slow breath, one of his hands curling around ed’s wrist to steady himself before he responds.  ❝ so. i’m afraid i still need you to help me understand, my darling.  you’re leaving.  but ...  you’ll be coming back, right ? ❞  &  there is a pause, but only a brief one, before he adds, ❝ &  — why are you going ?  did you say ? ❞


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