Hotel Reviews From Hell - Tumblr Posts - Page 2
get me out of here they've trapped me in this basement and it smells. strange
a new player has joined the arena
@inkdroplet-sivz
look at my lawyer dawg im going to JAIL
HOTEL MAINTENANCE RESPONSE
report from Void - Boiler Room
- he had it coming
- HEY HEY HEY with these portals we can finally navigate floor 17. also the AI has an... appeal
- YOOOOOOOO
- Do not pick up. Do NOT pick up.
- i thought you were gonna deal that with your probably illegal mayoral campaign??
- and i thank them for the delicious broth
- [sigh] hate being the infinite room guy. it's always "hey void may i borrow some of the boiler room for my mysterious statue collection?" "hey void, we accidentally ordered 6,900 copies of the bill nye cutout and we need somewhere to put them can we use your room" "oh void heads up we're storing our entire nuclear arsenal in the boiler room. lol" with you people. just once, just ONCE i would like to hear a "hi void how's your day?" "hey how's the boiler room? nice and dark and smoky and infinite?" "hey you can move some of your stuff into my room" "hey void how're those illegal experiments going?" "wow, soup? portals? writing? void your hobbies are so interesting". JUST ONCE!! but alas...
uh, anyway, room 96 is y'all's problem lmao bye
HOTEL MAINTENANCE REVIEW
TO VOID IN THE BOILER ROOM
Glad you took care of Gerald
Okay about the portals…..evil sentient AI is in fact BANNED from the hotel
Hatsune Miku may or may not be moving in with you (she’s in witness protection)
Area 51 keeps calling….should I be concerned?
Send Ted Cruz to the flesh pit (it misses him)
the black market thanks you for your organs
Speaking of which I need to store my new $800000 church organ in your room sorry
TO MARCELL IN ROOM 69
The weed business is great but this is not tegridy farms I will not tolerate a southern accent
Look about the uh things I’ve said uh…..9/11 is funny I’m sorry
Please never use a French accent ever again
OH MY GOD BABY
If you send me one more jamilton fanfic I will kms
Yes we can hang up the Halloween decor early this year
You can have bill nye tonight
General Notes
The lack of Colleen ballinger is good and appreciated
Why is it stinky in room 96
Why is it STICKY in room 96
Im doing it, are you?
happy one year anniversary to this... thing
zippity zoppity. say goodbye to your property [The lightning storm pulls out a pile of legal documents.]
oh fuck take my son and leave me alone
![Zippity Zoppity. Say Goodbye To Your Property [The Lightning Storm Pulls Out A Pile Of Legal Documents.]](https://64.media.tumblr.com/9caddca629d321bc532983461aeb43f8/6ec0ca5320dfad59-1a/s500x750/5b019583547b848616eaea8ed3f60662c28874fe.png)
hi did you know i do pedicures for free.
i'd like to keep my toenails and not lose extra organs thanks
How do you respond to the allegations about Your affair with the Hat Man™®©
[sweating profusely] Who? is this a warrior cat? hatman? uhhhh you've got the wrong guy Get out of my house [vanishes in a puff of sharpie-smelling smoke]
THE ONLY THING I'VE EVER GROOMED IS MY TWO PERSIAN HATS
How do you respond to the allegations about Your affair with the Hat Man™®©
[sweating profusely] Who? is this a warrior cat? hatman? uhhhh you've got the wrong guy Get out of my house [vanishes in a puff of sharpie-smelling smoke]
How moist is that boiler room, also what is your opinion on the word moist?
1. the boiler room is vast; you underestimate how many climates it can contain at times. i'd say pretty moist though
2. terrible awful word that i feel under my skin. incredibly vivid. 10/10