I AM DYING THIS IS FINE STOLAS IS SUCH A BAE - Tumblr Posts

Oh thank fuck, Stolas replied! Blitz's talons actually scratched the screen as he got his phone back out--fuck, fuck, fuck he was way stronger like this, this was fucking weird. He started to type a response, but when he pierced the screen? Realized that wasn't going to end well.

So, he called him, pacing back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And the instant he heard Stolas's voice on the other end, he blurted out: "I was messing with your book and I had a papercut and forgot about it and might have bled on a page and the power's out here so I'm like, surrounded in fucking candles and--listen." He clicked and clacked his beak, then shook himself hard, ruffling all of his feathers.

"Can you like, fix me? I will give you head every day for a week. Two weeks if you want. Like, first thing in the morning. Or, or--fuck. Anything. This is--I can touch the fucking ceiling. Without climbing the walls. And I can hear everything." Pace. Pace pace pace pace pace. Was that how Stolas's ears worked? Could he hear absolutely everything too? And was his vision this insanely sharp? This was fine. Everything was fine. It was fine.

@doublejango from here.

He blinks at his phone. Stolas scrolls through their texts, looking for any indicator that might suggest the most recent one was a joke, some sort of weirdly themed prank. Eventually, he gets down to the text box and replies.

My devilish little imp, I don't believe it is possible for you to have a cloaca. Or feathers, for that matter. What ever do you mean. . . by all of this? Shall we meet?