I Get The Sentiment Of This Post But I Can't Blindly And Completely Love Someone Who PRETENDS To Be Kind - Tumblr Posts

I get the sentiment of this post but I can't blindly and completely love someone who PRETENDS to be kind I've been used and betrayed way too many times by those very same people to be able to do so And then they blamed me for the betrayal because I was 'too difficult to love' In the end I just assume those people don't really want my love (because it has boundaries and challenges they aren't willing to deal with) They'd rather just want a submissive people pleaser who just swallows anything they'd throw at them and I'm done with trying to be that It goes against my nature and I shouldn't become a doormat just to be loved by anyone whatsoever If being free to be myself means I'm unlovable so be it. It would never be worth it to either side otherwise. I just hope those people can find someone they can genuinely love and truly improve themselves for someday. I just hope their effort becomes a true effort and not just a mask to get things their way. I just hope they can get genuine love and happiness and not need an fake personas to then betray the 'difficult' ones anymore Even if I gave up on love and don't try to take that risk anymore I truly do hope it can heal other people 'How about yourself?' I don't really need love I just need peace of mind and I can only get it by not concerning myself with love Love gives me anxiety because it feels like my feelings and personhood are always going to be met with stones and hatred instead So I'd just rather... Leave it all alone. Live my life away from it. 'Don't you feel something is missing tho?' Well lots of things are! But life is imperfect and that is what that is. I wasn't made for love. My love is off-putting and I'm unlovable. But I hope other people who are more inclined to it can be fulfilled.