My Jarchivist Obsession Increases By The Second - Tumblr Posts
JONATHAN SIMS
PITIFUL WET RAG OF A MAN MOTHERFUCKING JONATHAN SIMS.
GOD DAMN BELOVED WIMP ASS STATEMENT GATHERING ,SAD BACKSTORY, LACTOSE INTOLERANT VIBES, AVATAR OF THE NERD, BLINDEST EYE PATRON OF THE CENTURY, KIDNAPPED FOUR TIMES IN 100 EPISODES MOTHERFUCKING JONATHAN SIMS
YOU CAN KEEP CRINGE LIKING MY POSTS I ENJOY THE NOTES I LOVE HIM SO MUCH
WHY DOES HE ALWAYS END UP IN THE MOST FUCKED UP SITUATIONS , EVER SINCE HE WAS A CHILD ??? NO WONDER HE ENDED UP AT THE ARCHIVE, OBSESSIVE ASS AUTISTIC CODED BITCH
THIS LIMP WRISTED SAD PATHETIC MAN HAS SUCH A VISCERALLY POSITIVE EFFECT ON ME, NOT EVEN IN THE ROOM NEVER SEEN THIS MANS FACE, AND I KNOW HE HAS THE WORLDS MOST DEPRESSED COLLEGE PROFESSOR YOU WANT TO HELP WITH HIS COMPUTER VIBES
If i wanted to get into heaven and god said I had to recant all that I’ve ever said about him being adorable and wanting to wrap him into a bundle of towels like a kitten, I’d simply go knock on hell’s door, they at least might accept my pitiful man loving ways. Almost a full ass lesbian and I would marry this man just for the sake of protecting him from the horrors.
If I have to deal with one more person insisting I have a crush on the voice actor and showing me his picture, I will start digitalising myself to escape their bullshit no good hearing and reading comprehension and I will slow down their internet connection out of spite
i dont even know why i love him so much. he reads messed up stories but i am just obsessed because i am projecting.
he better have some more fucked up backstory episodes bc if I never get to acquire more lore on him I will just have to write it myself
I hope he gets some affection and love soon cuz if he doesn’t I’m going to make him
paypal.com/IFuckingLoveJonSims
Almost all the episodes have him in them and its still not enough. vaguely see something that reminds me of him and I black out and lose my train of thought for the next 20 minutes
I’ve been spoiled about the ending, but I won’t let that stop me from hoping he gets the peace and love he deserves, i love denial and ignoring canon
I'll lovingly squish jon and his sad pitiful little archivist body will simply crumble to pieces when faced with how much I love him until all that's left is one final statement recorded on his trusty tape recorder titled MAG 201 “A Jon Stan” written in curly-q handwriting on top
im not breathing im hyperventilating at this point
i hope theres a date given for when he’s resuscitated or appears as a cryptid to haunt people so i can make it a reminder on my phone
once a year i will see it and will do so many little things to pay respects to the man who recorded hundreds of fucked up little stories and still couldn’t escape his destiny to became one himself.
(very much inspired by the Jurgen Leitner rant : https://jurgen-leitner-rant.neocities.org )