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Angst (Mark Lee x Reader)

{10:04 PM}

Angst Prompt: “It’s Ok, you don’t have to love me back”

You skimmed over the last few words of your essay. You stretched your arms and let out a soft groan. You took a deep breath and pressed the submit button. You waited a few moments and slumped back when you saw the confirmation. You were finally done. You leaned over the your side and reached for your phone. The first thing that you noticed was your lock screen. You smiled as you reminisced about the memory.

It was winter. The sky was inky black but the street lamps lit up the streets perfectly. The trees were covered in a light layer of snow. Everything was perfect, you were unbelievably happy walking next to the love of your life. You and Mark walked in comfortable silence when you felt his hand touch your shoulder. You look at him with a smile and you can see a blush creep onto his cheeks. “Wanna take a picture together?” he asked. You looked at him incredulously. “I mean-, if-, if you want to..i guess,” he stuttered. You smiled as you reached up to poke his cheek, “I would love to, I just didn’t expect my Markie to be so bold,” you said teasingly. He looked away but you could see the traces of a smile. 

You pulled out your phone and raised it up to fit the both of you. You both held up piece signs and hearts. As you were snapping pictures, you felt him kiss your cheek. You blushed and looked away. He smiled as you took your phone from your hand. “Aww, my baby looks so cute,” he gushed, poking your cheeks. You looked at the picture and couldn’t help but smile. It was perfect.

Every thing was so perfect back then.

You stared at the lockscreen when a message popped up, distracting you from your trip down memory lane. It was from Mark. You frowned slightly upon reading it. 

Y/N, I’m waiting at your lobby, can you come and meet me down here, we need to talk - Mark

You grabbed your coat, phone and keys and ran out the door. You ran the stairs and smiled when you saw him in the lobby. He eyes met yours and dropped down to the ground. Your smile fell off your face. You walked up to him and was about to touch his face, when he moved away. “Let’s talk in the car,” he said softly, turning away. You follow him and sat in the passenger seat of his car. It was warm and you looked out the windows, confused and anxious. It was silent for about twenty minutes, neither you or Mark said a word. 

You must have dozed off because when you woke up, Mark was staring out the window, nervously tapping his foot. He noticed that you woke up and took a deep breath. “We’re here,” he said. “What’s going on? Mark, you’re scaring me,” you say softly. His eyes meet yours, his eyes are soft and you can see tears brim in his eyes. You reach up to wipe away the tears but he pushes your hands away softly, “ Let me explain,” Mark starts, “Recently NCT’s debut has been finalized and I’ve been offered a position to be in 2 of the units. Sooman talked to me and told me how I’m really talented and how I’ve been working for so long that I deserve to debut. But he said that he’ll let me debut under one condition.” “Condition?”you ask cautiously. “I have to be single, I’ll be allowed to debut as long as I am not in a relationship,” he says sadly. You felt your heart drop. You started tearing up, Mark head perked up and immediately reached to wipe away your tears but you swatted his hands away. His eyes look back at the ground. “So? What is your decision?” you say, a little part of you praying that he declined. You yell at yourself, how could you ask Mark to put you before his dream. Maybe because you wanted him to love you just as much as you loved him. “I’ve decided that I really want to debut. Y/n, I’m so sorry. You deserve better but I need to debut. This is my dream,” he says, his eyes pleading with yours. You nod. “I understand, I love you. I always have,” you say with a sad smile, “It’s Ok, you don’t have to love me back”. His eyes meet yours and you can see his heart break. “Can we.. at least try and be friends? I need you in my life,” Mark asks. “Mark, I don’t think I can physically commit to being friends with you. Everytime, I look at you, I’m reminded of all the memories we made together. I can’t be near you without wanting to kiss you,” you say. He nods and roughly starts up the car. “Mark, please don’t be angry. I’m sorry,” you say softly. “Don’t say that you’re sorry, the only person who should be apologizing is me. You did nothing wrong, it’s all me and will always be me,” he says quietly. 

The rest of the drive home is quiet. You stare out the windows. It reminds you of the night in the park. You pull out you phone and press on the picture of you and Mark. You look at it silently before pressing the delete icon. Your heart aches as you watch the picture disappear. You continue to stare out the window, unaware of Mark’s eyes. His heart shattered watching you delete that picture. That picture was a memory that he cherished so dearly. He looked back at the road, silently begging his heart to stop aching.

As you reached your home, You got of the car slowly. Mark walked you up to the door. You were about to walk in when you felt him grip your wrist. “I know that I’m asking for a lot but can i hug you one last time?” he asks. You nod and feel him pull you into a tight hug. You fell his warm breath fall onto a sensitive patch of your neck. You shuddered slightly. You hug his torso tightly. You both take in each others’ scent one last time. He smiles as he pulls away. He brushes some hair away form your face and tucks it behind your ear. “You really are so pretty and I have no clue how I got you for myself,” he smiles, “I’m truly sorry for all of this but if you ever want to talk as friends you can always call me”. You nod as you turn away to enter your house. You look back and see that his eyes are still on you. You smile and wave goodbye. He smiles back sadly. 

Goodbye, that word, broke both of your hearts.

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Author’s note: hihi! I know that i write a lot of angst. Its’ cause i’m a very sad person. sorry if this is getting very boring for you. please feel free to request any genre. I will try my best. Once, again thank you for supporting me and my account. I really appreciate it :)

nct fluff (johnny x reader)

{6:45 PM}

warnings; none (its pretty angsty/fluffy)

word count ~ 1.3k

Bright sunrays filtered through the large window. The curtains were barely closed, allowing the sunlight to illuminate the entire room. 

The brightness of the room caused you to shift your body away from the window, ultimately moving yourself out of the grasp of the person next to you. 

You felt yourself lose your consciousness again as drowsiness washed over you. 

Suddenly, your phone started ringing. The shrill piercing sound of your ringtone caused you to jerk awake. 

The figure next to you stirred in his sleep, groaning at the harsh loudness of the phone. He reached for you waist and pulled you into his bear-like grip. 

You lightly reach over the sleeping mans figure and picked up your phone. The callers ID danced across your screen. You rub your eyes tiredly, trying to focus on the ID. 

Your eyes widened when you realized that your boss was calling. You sat up quickly, pushing away the arm that was wrapped around your waist. 

Ignoring the whines of the person next to you, you cleared your throat. 

“Hi Sir”, you answer in a cheerful, high pitched voice. 

The man next to you rubbed his eyes and looked at you with a look of confusion and tiredness.

“Sorry sir?”, you ask while looking at the man next to you, “Am I alone? Yes sir, I am alone”.

You watched as Johnny’s eyes narrow at the blatant lie. 

“No Sir, I’m not busy. Oh the party? 15 minutes earlier? Of course!”, you answer in a honey-sweet voice. 

Johnny reached out to touch your jaw. You absently pushed his hand away as you nod along to what the person on the phone was saying. You stretched and started to move over Johnny. 

“Baby, don’t go”, he pouted, patting the empty pillow that you had been sleeping on. 

You kiss his head, smiling and agreeing with your boss. You brush off Johnny’s hand once again and walk to the kitchen to make yourself a coffee. 

You were so busy that you didn’t notice Johnny’s scowl and pout. 

After a few minutes, your call ended with your boss. You had made two cups of coffee and toasted a few pieces of bread. 

“Johnny? Where are you? Breakfasts ready, honey!”, you call out, expecting your extremely tall, cuddly, giant to come bounding out of the bedroom. 

When Johnny didn’t come out, you walked into your shared bedroom. Johnny lay on the bed, on his phone. 

You smile and stride over to him. You kneel down and reach out to touch his hair, when you feel him stop your hand. Your smile instantly dissipates from your face. 

“Did you need something?”, he asks coldly without looking away from his phone.

“I just wanted to say that breakfast is ready, baby”, you answer sweetly, hoping that he would look at you. 

“I’m tired, you should eat and go to work, I’ll eat later”, he says non interestedly. 

“Oh... I just wanted us to eat together before I go”, you say quietly. 

“You should go get ready or something”, he says finally, turning his body away from you, signaling that this conversation was over.

You nodded, silently before getting up and walking to your closet. 

Johnny turned back slightly to look at you. Your shoulder had sagged and you silently picked out your work clothes. You walked out of the room without looking back. 

After a few moment, he heard the door open and close. He let out a breath that he didn’t know he was holding. 

He got out of bed and made his way to the kitchen. There on the counter, was a cup of coffee and toast on a plate. There was a sticky note next to the plate, written in your messy handwriting. 

He smiled softly as he imagines you quickly scrawling down the note. 

‘Johnny Bear, I don’t know why you’re upset. I’m sorry that I haven’t been observant enough. I am not good enough to be your girlfriend and I know that. I’ll try harder, please talk to me. I love you, lets’ talk when I get home (I’m planning a big party today, wish me luck). Be safe and don’t do anything stupid <3′ - Y/N, your pretty baby ;)

He frowned when he read your letter. He shouldn’t have acted so childish. He felt unhappy, knowing that you were blaming yourself for not being a good girlfriend when he was the one being stupid. 

He reached for his phone when he realized you were probably busy. 

He looked around the kitchen, looking for something to cook for you when you came home. His eyes landed on the spaghetti and he quickly started to get ready to cook. 

Johnny finished cooking and looked at the clock, 5:53 PM. He stood in front of the clock, wondering what to do next. His eyes landed on the dishes, he groaned but moved to start washing them. 

When he was done washing the dishes, he stared back up at the clock, 6:24 PM. He frowned, you were usually home by 6 PM. His fingers tapped the counter, worry starting to fill his gut. As if fate had heard him, he heard the lock of the apartment click open. 

He watched as you opened the door. Your gray blazer was ruffled, strands of your hair had fallen out if the makeshift ponytail you made, your hands were full of grocery bags as you stumbled in. 

You pant as you drop the bags. You look over at him and smile. “Help me, you big baby”, you tease. 

Before you knew it, Johnny strode across the room and lifted your jaw up. He leant down and pressed his lips to yours. You smile into the kiss, moving your hands to rest on his torso. 

He pulls away and pecks your forehead, before bending down and picking up all the grocery bags with ease, his biceps strain under the weight of all the bags, but he seems at ease. You watch his muscles flex, mouth agape. 

“Stop watching my muscles, babe”, he says with a wink, “Also go shower, you look like you got run over by a train and I made dinner so hurry up”

You grin as you practically run to the shower. 

After a few minutes, you walk out of the shower, wearing one of his over sized t-shirts and some shorts. 

You see Johnny sitting on the couch, engaged in the show playing on TV. You quietly walk up to him, and sit down on his lap. He looks at you with surprise, not noticing that you finished showering. You lightly push his head to focus back on the TV, as you lean back to nuzzle your head in the crook of his neck. He smiles before pulling you tightly into his chest. 

You smile, as you turn to watch TV. 

“Hey babe? This morning, when you were on the phone, why did you say you were alone?”, Johnny asks cautiously without looking away from the TV. You look at him curiously when it suddenly dawned to you why Johnny was so angry in the morning. 

“AWWW”, you screech, as you turn to straddle him, pinching his cheeks, “You were angry cause I said I was alone. My giant baby was jealous”

He pushed you lightly, turning his head away from you, a small embarrassed smile graced his face. 

“My boss was asking me if I was alone, cause he was throwing a surprise party for one of my close friends at the office, he didn’t want anyone to know about the party except for me in the morning. I’m sorry babe”, you say, lightly caressing his hair. 

Johnny nods understandingly, as he tilted his head into the palm of your hands. You feel him kiss your forehead before turning his attention back to the TV, his hands lays comfortably on your back. 

Before you know it, you feel yourself relax, listening to the drone of the TV and Johnny’s heartbeat. 

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A/N: I don’t know what this is but it feels very cute. I’ve been busy with school but I am trying. I hope you enjoyed reading this. Feel free to leave a like or comment. Please leave any thoughts that you may have, just try and keep it positive. Once again, thanks for the support :)