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「𝐌𝐨𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 ⇀ 𝑲.𝑴𝒂𝒕𝒔𝒖𝒏𝒐」

── ❝𝗜 𝗡𝗘𝗩𝗘𝗥 𝗞𝗡𝗘𝗪         𝗬𝗢𝗨 𝗖𝗢𝗨𝗟𝗗 𝗛𝗢𝗟𝗗         𝗠𝗢𝗢𝗡𝗟𝗜𝗚𝗛𝗧 𝗜𝗡         𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗥 𝗛𝗔𝗡𝗗𝗦 ❞

    〡𝑲𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒎𝒂𝒕𝒔𝒖 𝑴𝒂𝒕𝒔𝒖𝒏𝒐 𝑿 𝑹𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓〡

◉ ┅ ┅ ┅ ┅ ┅ ┅ ┅ ┅ ┅

𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘶𝘦

❀

Chapter Index:

❀ | ①    ❀ | ②   ❀ | ③  ❀ | ④  ❀ | ⑤ ❀ | ⑥ ❀ | ⑦

𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘶𝘦

𝗡𝗢𝗪 𝗣𝗟𝗔𝗬𝗜𝗡𝗚: 𝙢𝙤𝙤𝙣𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 - 𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙖𝙣𝙖 𝙜𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙚 ı𝗹ıı𝗹ıı𝗹ıı𝗹ıı𝗹ıı𝗹ı ᴠᴏʟᴜᴍᴇ : ▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮ 𝟬:𝟬𝟭 ─●──────── 𝟯:𝟮𝟵 ◁ 𝗜𝗜 ▷

➳༻❀✿❀༺➳

○𝘒𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘴𝘶 𝘔𝘢𝘵𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘰 ⇾ 𝐀𝐤𝐚𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐚 𝐊𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐝𝐨𝐦

❝𝑻𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒏𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝑰 𝒉𝒆𝒍𝒅 𝒚𝒐𝒖,❞

○[𝘠/𝘕] [𝘓/𝘕] ⇾ 𝐀𝐨𝐤𝐢 𝐊𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐝𝐨𝐦

❝𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒎𝒚 𝒎𝒐𝒐𝒏𝒍𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕.❞

❛𝑨 𝒇𝒂𝒏𝒇𝒊𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒃𝒚 𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒎𝒎𝒆𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈_𝒄𝒍𝒐𝒖𝒅𝒔❜ 月

❀

𝗥𝗼𝘀𝗲𝘀

You write to me about roses, About roses opening as roses die. Always, you say, there are roses, So that people get used to them And cease to wonder. Now I am on a hilltop, Bare, with a few pine trees Twisted by an inexhaustible wind, By a wind that is never tired, A wind that passes and passes and is never gone. I cannot think what it would be like for the pine trees If there were no wind.

——

Your roses would not be happy on my hilltop. They would be scornful of my huckleberry bush With their plain, blue fruit.

——

They would not care for the white meadow-sweet That leans against a rock. Roses must have rich soil, And careful pruning. They must be sheltered from the wind and cold And have stakes to lean upon. They do not stand alone like the flames of vervain On my windy hilltop.

——

Roses are gifts for lovers. Lovers have always had much to say about roses. When you sent me a rose Folded in a letter, Did you know I would open it on a hilltop Where the wind searches me As it does the pine trees And my skirts are brushing The fine flame of the vervain?

—𝙇𝙤𝙪𝙞𝙨𝙚 𝘿𝙧𝙞𝙨𝙘𝙤𝙡𝙡

❀ | ①

╔═════ °• ♔ •° ═════╗ 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐝 ╚═════ °• ♔ •° ═════╝

The letter crumpled between your fingers, your grasp becoming too tight for the fragile thing. Your angered steps echoed through the empty hallways as you made your way to the main throne room, bursting through the door despite your butler's worried cries.

"What is the meaning of this?!" you seethed, waving the pale paper towards the two lone figures in the room. A heavy sigh resonated from your father as he pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger.

"[Y/N], you are of age to be married. Of course we had to choose a suitable groom for you--"

"I know that!" you cut him off. "But that isn't what I'm talking about. Out of all the kingdoms we have alliances with, you picked this one?!"

"They made us an offer, [Y/N]. You know that we must do what we can to protect out kingdom!" your mother spoke next, furrowing her brows in worry. She glanced at her husband, who's lips were set in a firm, solemn line.

"And you must know that each of those six princes are utterly useless when it comes to ruling a kingdom! Why do you think none of them have been married off yet?"

"[Y/N], that's enough." your father stood from his throne, straightening his regal robes as he offered his wife a hand, carrying her down the set of high steps and heading for the door you had entered through, sweeping past you. You spluttered, the letter forgotten in your palm as you hardened your hold.

"But father--!"

"There is nothing else to discuss!"

The annoyed tone of your father's words hung in the air dangerously, like icicles waiting to drop.

"By now, one of the Matsuno sextuplets will have been chosen and is being sent here for twelve months. You will behave yourself and treat him as your future husband, and that, is, it. There is nothing you can do to change anyone's minds."

He turned to you, eyes full of stern resolution, locking onto your horrified glare.

"Am I understood?"

He didn't move an inch as you stayed silent, lowering your head as you spat out the words through gritted teeth.

"...Yes, father."

You burned holes through the ground as your parents walked away, the final closing of the doors telling you that you were completely and utterly alone. You grasped the letter between both hands, ripping it apart in a fit of bubbling anger, the fragmented remains scattering across the marble floors.

Storming away to your room, skirts raised above the ground so they wouldn't slow you down any further, thought after thought trickled to your mind, only serving to fuel the fire growing in the pit of your stomach.

Akatsuka Kingdom. Known for its power, as well as the rare phenomena that was the six princes, all identical sextuplets who were born into the royal family. Many thought they would assist the kingdom in growing stronger, using their princely wits and charms to raise their power.

Instead, they all became well known for their immense stupidity and lack of interest in becoming King and inheriting the throne from their parents, let alone marrying into a wealthy royal family, such as your own.

You slammed your bedroom doors shut, breathing heavily. Now, somehow, you were destined to marry one of them? Was this fate's cruel way of messing up your future? Slowly, you reached a hand up to the tiara resting haphazardly on your head, removing it and holding it to your eyes. The jewels encrusted into the gold linings reflected your scowl back at you, distorted and warped hideously.

From a young age, your mind had matured a lot quicker than your body. You were more interested in learning about how to be a perfect ruler than the other snobby royals and lords you had met over the years. You had always longed to find someone of the same mindset, in hopes that they would aid you in strengthening your own kingdom.

But now, everything was falling apart right in front of you, and you apparently had no say in the matter.

The tiara fell from your fingers, rolling across the ground with a clatter. You didn't care where it was. You slid down against the door, head cradled in your hands.

What would you do now? What now? What now? What. Now?

The answer seemed obvious, too obvious at first.

You raised your head, glaring at empty air, barely registering how dark the room had become. The setting sun glinted dangerously through your windows, lighting up your eyes in a raging fire that had suddenly exploded from withing you.

You couldn't cancel the wedding. But no one ever said that they couldn't. All you had to do was keep pushing, and pushing, and pushing, all the way to their breaking point. Then they would leave, and you would be at peace. You would have him gone no sooner than he arrives.

A malicious grin crossed your lips as you carefully stood up, picking up your tiara off of the ground. You twirled the headpiece between your fingers, the dark shadows in the dimly lit room casting a sinister aura over your form.

You huffed a silent chuckle. It was ironic, really. Your kingdom was known for its everlasting beauty, filled to the brim with flowers and greenery that attracted others like a bee to its nectar. However, it's as the old saying goes...

"Every rose has its thorns."

❀ | ②

╔═════ °• ♔ •° ═════╗ 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐞𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡, 𝐢𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐦𝐬 ╚═════ °• ♔ •° ═════╝

You did everything you could to avoid meeting the prince when he arrived, but it seemed that your parents were expecting this, and had knights placed around every corner of the castle in order to escort you down to the main gates.

You kept your face a blank slate as you stood between your parents, hands folded neatly in front of you, just as you were always taught. Your eyes were trained on a carriage glinting in the distance, slowly approaching.

"I hope you remember your manners, [Y/N]," your father muttered, barely moving as he addressed you. You suppressed the urge to roll your eyes, replying flatly;

"How could I, father? Especially after that little talk we had yesterday. I know my place."

"Just don't do anything out of order."

"You can trust me, father." You briefly turned to him, flashing a bright smile that didn't quiet reach your eyes — not that he had the chance to notice that. "I may act rash, but have I ever gone against my word?"

He had no chance to respond, either, as the carriage had pulled to a stop in front of you, it's white horses shaking their heads with a huff. The driver of the carriage stepped off his seat, swiftly moving to the door and pulling it open with a bow.

"May I present Prince Karamatsu, of Akatsuka Kingdom."

Out stepped a man with a pale, rounded face and thick brows resting above his large eyes, his dark hair slicked back with a few rare streaks of royal blue running through the sides. His attire also had flashes of azure, fitting nicely against the white fabric. Except for the cape which he had draped over his right shoulder; it was covered in glittering sequins, practically blinding you all as it reflected the sun's light in multiple directions.

You hid your grimace well, though your brow twitched every now and then at his atrocious display. The man, Karamatsu, brought a gloved hand to his chin, eyes sweeping over your small royal family. His lips stretched into a cat-like grin, eyes lidded as he hummed triumphantly.

"It seems that I have arrived at my destination!" He pointed his hand towards the sky, posing dramatically. "Fate has led me down my destined path, yet it still stretches onwards! Where to, next? Our mortal minds will never know!"

His monologue was met with confused silence. You hated how the deep rumble of his voice raised goosebumps across your skin. Your fingers were gripping your palms in a white-knuckled grip, resisting the urge to pull out your hair. You hoped that now, your parents could see what kind of hell they were attempting to put you through.

It didn't take long for his luggage to be taken into the palace, a surge of maids carrying uncountable amounts of cases to his new sleeping quarters. Your parents showed him through to the main hall, having a pleasantly one-sided conversation with the prince whilst you followed silently from behind. Your father cleared his throat after a moment, plastering a polite smile on his face.

"Well, Queen Koume and I must get back to our royal duties. I can assure you that our servants and knights around the palace are more than able to aid you should you need anything, Prince Karamatsu," he bowed his head lightly. Glancing at you, he added, "Our daughter is also quite the intelligent child. I'm sure she will be more than happy to assist her fiancé in any way she can." He pressed the last few words as he stared hard at you, lips thinning into a flat line as no response was given from you, not even a twitch of facial expression.

Your mother tugged gently on his arm, a warning look subtly sent his way as she smiled at her guest. "We shall see you at dinner later tonight, dear." With that, she led her husband away, disappearing round a corner and leaving the two of you alone. Instantly, the Prince was bowing low in front of you, almost comically so.

"I am truly blessed from the heavens above to be given such an opportunity to wed the most exquisite of flowers!" He took a gentle hold of your hand, bringing the back of your hand to his lips and placing a chaste kiss against your skin. You merely watched on with a slightly raised brow.

"Princess, I look forward to our future together!"

A moment of silence passed before you smiled softly.

"How sweet! I most certainly do not look forward to our time spent together, unfortunately!"

"Hm! As expected, my Princess is as kind as she appears! Soft and kind-hearted, you— ..I'm sorry, what was it that you said?" His tone fell from confident to unsure in a heartbeat. You slowly allowed you smile to fall away into a scornful glare, the man's lips now pulled into a timid smile, sweat beginning to accumulate on his temple.

"It seems that you can actually listen to something other than your own voice," you sneered, crossing your arms over your chest. He tilted his head, confused and slight hurt flashing through his eyes. "This whole set up for our marriage is one of the worst things my parents could ever do."

You took a few steps forward, standing chest to chest with him and pushing a finger against him.

"Let me make this clear, your highness," you spat, "I, just like many other princesses across the region, don't want anything to do with you and your kingdom. If you had any sense with you, then I would expect you to be gone by dinner today, and to call off this god forsaken wedding the minute you arrive back."

You turned on your heel, snapping your fingers as you walked away, a grin spreading across your lips. The look of disbelief on his face was enough to assure you that he would definitely be taking your kind token of advice.

Behind you, a servant you had summoned was busy trying to coax a frozen Karamatsu to his room, his eyes locked onto your back as you grew further and further away from him, eventually disappearing from his view.

You spent the rest of the hours till evening reading in the library, making use of your secret corner hidden atop the bookshelves to catch up on the handful of novels you had picked up. Your mind had stopped thinking of the so-called guest that had entered your home while you were distracted, only to be reminded of his existence when your butler came to fetch you for dinner.

"Tanuki? Where is the Prince?" You asked innocently as you were led to the dining room. Your butler hummed thoughtfully.

"I am sorry, your highness. I haven't seen him since his arrival this morning. As far as I'm aware, he should be joining us for dinner this evening."

'Oh, I'm sure he won't be,' you thought giddily.

A set of tall doors were pushed open for you, the long table filled with food beckoning for you to take a seat. Only, you were stuck where you stood. Your eye twitched dangerously at the sight before you, your lips trembling as you struggled to keep them shut so as not to scream in frustration.

He was sat there, happily chatting away with your mother as your father laughed at something he had said. His eyes locked into yours, the air stilling for a moment before his smile widened, gesturing for you to come take a seat.

"Good evening, Princess! I'm sure that the food will taste ten times better now that we have been graced with your presence!"

He winked at you from across the table as your chair was pushed in. The grip on your utensils tightened considerably. A voice in the back of your mind was becoming louder and louder, drowning out the talk around you.

You had underestimated him, it seems.

'No matter.'

You pierced a morsel of food harshly with your fork.

'This just means I can resort to harsher methods.'

❀ | ③

╔═════ °• ♔ •° ═════╗

𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠. 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠.

╚═════ °• ♔ •° ═════╝

"What do you think, dear?" Your mother turned to you with a smile. "A horse ride with your future husband sounds quite relaxing, don't you think?"

"It would be quite relaxing, if my future husband actually knew how to ride horses instead of betting on them," you replied flatly, staring right into the man's dark eyes. He met your deadpan look with a smug grin, corners of his mouth curling upwards.

"Touché, my love!" You grit your teeth at the pet name. "Although, I am quite certain you will enjoy the riveting show of horse racing just as much, with my presence by your side!"

"I'm sure she will come to enjoy a few games!" your father agreed. "I myself cannot deny the joy of horse betting."

"Wonderful story, father," you rolled your eyes. Standing up from your seat, you bunched up your skirts as you began making a hasty exit. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have more important matters to worry about," you turned back with a spiteful glare, "such as making sure my kingdom doesn't fall to ruins."

You never liked waiting for responses, and so you left with those final words hanging in the air. Your platter of food had barely been touched, but who could blame you? Your appetite was no longer with you after having to sit at a table with three people who you currently felt nothing but anger towards.

You didn't actually know what you were going to do after leaving the dining hall. If you were being honest, you didn't particularly feel like studying or reading -- you were sure that if you picked up a book, or any object for that matter, it would just end up being hurled at the wall.

Your stomach churned uncomfortably as you stalked down the large, empty hallways. Your footsteps echoed around you, too loud for your tastes. They rang in your ears like high-pitched white noise, never ending, ringing and ringing. It made your chest feel tight. Which you found odd; you were sure you hadn't worn a corset on this particular day.

Everything seemed to be doing a great job at ticking you off, so you took a sharp left instead of a right towards your quarters, heading for the garden. You paused in the glass doorway, eyes scanning over the tall bushes and bunches of flowers decorating the space. The large fountain could just about be seen in the distance, the moon above casting a glinting glow on its running water.

Taking careful steps down, you sighed heavily as your foot made contact with the gravelled pathway, the crunching stones muffling the sound of your heels greatly. You spotted a few guards patrolling the perimeter, each of them giving you a stiff bow before marching onward, their guns propped against their shoulders. You held your tongue this time as they passed.

It was dark, but not dark enough so that you couldn't see where you were going. A breeze swept by, but it's calming nature was lost on you. You slowed your quick pace down to a gentle walk, eyeing the delicately trimmed hedges that stood tall around you.

In most kingdoms, the hedges would be covered in roses, always deep crimson, and always blooming. You had always wondered if they were even real. You had touched their petals, but they didn't feel like silk; thy felt rough and fabricated. Empty, with no sense of care oozing from their centres. They were just as fake as the smiles others had sent your way, ever since you were young.

You raised a hand, stretching a single finger outward towards the flower. It's bleeding colours were darkened under the night sky. For a moment, you forgot that roses were red. This one looked black. Pure black, a darkened abyss, swirling and writhing, contorting into sneering faces. It swayed in the breeze, laughing and mocking you.

You returned your hand. Turning away, you headed towards the fountain, taking a seat on its marble ring. Your tiara was in your hands again. You could barely make out it's engraved designs. The cut gems had lost their flare. They were dull, now. They were nothing more than stones to you. Nothing special. Nothing unique. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing.

Amidst the trickling of water from behind you, a pair of footsteps sounded from nearby. You straightened your posture, replacing the tiara above your locks, glancing over to your right. A horrible glare graced your features when you saw who it was.

"Please, wait! Don't leave yet!" Karamatsu spoke first, hastening his walk into a jog to reach you. He looked like a lost puppy, eyes wide and brows upturned as he begged you through his dark orbs to stay.

'Pathetic.'

"Well? What do you want?" you snapped, crossing your arms over your chest as you turned your nose up in spite. The man took a deep breath, whether in relief or to calm his anger, you didn't care.

"Princess, I... Would it be alright if I sat with you here?" He timidly asked, a small smile on his lips. It wasn't the same one as before. You raised a brow.

"That's what you came all the way out here for?" You sighed heavily, standing from your seat. "I don't have to time to waste on the likes of you." You began walking away, annoyance rolling off of you in waves.

"No-- Wait!" He grabbed a hold of your wrist, harshly halting your movements. "I just meant that--"

"Don't you get it?" you whipped around, boring your hardened gaze into his own eyes. He flinched at the look. "You are nothing but a burden to me. I want nothing to do with you, and there is nothing you can do to change my mind!" your voice raised with each word, and you caught yourself before it could get any worse.

Taking a deep breath, you yanked your wrist out of his hand.

"I'm giving you one more warning. Leave by morning, if you know what's good for you." You turned away once more.

"...Do you really hate me that much?"

His voice was soft and gentle. No trace of anger was there in his words. Not even sadness. It was an emotion you couldn't quite identify. You turned to look at him. The moon shone down over him, casting a ghostly glow over his face.

He was smiling. Now you knew what it was. It was understanding.

"...I see," he bowed low to you, the same way he did when he first met you. "I bid you a goodnight, Princess. Sleep well."

You had no words. Nothing left your lips, although they were parted. You stared at him for a moment, then you turned and finally walked away. Reaching the steps back up the castle, you paused, the itching urge to look back one more time biting at you, but you fought against it.

You didn't care. You didn't care. You didn't.

The castle was quiet now. Your footsteps didn't bother you this time. The emptiness didn't disturb you this time. Your stomach was no longer churning. All was still. Was it always this quiet?

Reaching your room, you didn't bother to change out of your dress just yet. Instead, you moved towards you tall window in the dark, moving away the thick curtains. You sank to the ground, your skirts flattening out around you like a withering flower. You stared upwards, towards the moon.

A plain white disc in the sky. Greying in some areas. A soft, dark shadow surrounding its edges. The stars couldn't sparkle as bright as the moon. No matter what. The stars that hung in the night sky could never, ever, shine as bright as the moon.

You sat there, nails digging into your upper arms as you lost yourself in thought. The moon rose higher and higher. So many thoughts, and at the same time, nothing at all.

❀ | ④

╔═════ °• ♔ •° ═════╗ 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐯𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐥 ╚═════ °• ♔ •° ═════╝

Delicate strokes to your hair woke you from your slumber. You grumbled, mind still disoriented. The hand sifting through your locks paused for a split second before continuing.

Blearily opening your eyes, you saw your mother, sat beside you on your bed, which you didn't remember getting into. She smiled down at you warmly, the crow's feet settled into the corners of her eyes adding a twinkle to her gaze.

"My daughter has finally awoken, I see," she chuckled. You squinted at her, not entirely hearing what she was saying, until you moved your upper body and rested your head on her lap. She laughed louder, allowing you to nestle comfortably against her.

"... time is it..?" You croaked, to tired to even bother forming a full sentence.

"Just past nine o'clock, dear. I'm surprised; usually you're up by eight." She raised a brow at you, but you ignored her, keeping your eyes closed. They felt sore and itchy, and most likely looked a soft shade of pink. You knew this.

"[Y/N], you need to wake up soon," there was a gentle nudge to your shoulder. "Your father has many things planned for you today."

You groaned loudly. That was the last thing you wanted. It was foolish to have it, but you had a small slither of hope left in you as you asked slowly:

"...Is he still here?"

A moment of silence, and then a sigh.

"You should have joined us for breakfast, dear. He truly is a nice fellow."

"No, he isn't." You sat up abruptly, turning away from her. A cold shiver ran through you as your arms became exposed. Glancing down, you saw you were wearing your night wear instead of your dress. It was then you realised your mind was on autopilot last night.

"[Y/N], please..."

"I'm not like you!" A stiff pause. "I can't see the good in people the way you do. So how do you expect me to see anything in him? A man who knows nothing of the world other than the fantasies he has been brought up with?"

You received no answer. Standing from your bed, you marched over to your dresser, pulling open the drawers. Something caught your eye, and you froze.

The vase you kept on your dresser was always empty. You came to dislike filling it with flowers, as the dying petals would always make a mess. It annoyed you to no end, how quickly flowers could wilt away. Too quickly.

But here, now, it was full. Fresh and vibrant hyacinths were placed in the vase, their petals bursting full of colour and life. They weren't leaning heavily to one side, like yours used to. They stood tall and proud, soaking up the sunlight just entering your room.

"Prince Karamatsu asked the maids to send these up to you." You flinched at the name.

"The only reason you cannot see the good in others is because you are always looking for the bad. If that's all you can see, then you will remain blind to the good." Your mother stood, leaving the room. Grasping the handle to your door, she looked back to you one more time, a smile still present. It looked all too familiar.

"He is not a bad person. Give him a chance."

The door shut behind her with a soft thud, leaving the room silent once more. You brought your gaze back to the flowers. They just had to be purple, didn't they?

➳༻❀✿❀༺➳

"Horse riding?" you cringed. You eyed the horses with disdain, taking a step back as one of them shook their mane.

Your father came over to your side, hands on his hips as he smiled proudly at the selection of horses before him. Karamatsu was over by his own white-haired horse which had been brought over for him, busy patting its nuzzle with a fond smirk.

"But of course! The weather is perfect for it, don't you think?"

"No.." you grumbled under your breath, somewhat glad he hadn't heard you. Your father also went over to feed an apple to his horse, taking a brush and smoothing out its chestnut hair. You stood frigidly, unsure of what to do. You were desperate to walk back to the castle, but something was stopping you. And it was irritating you, how you couldn't figure out what it was.

Slowly, your eyes wandered around the stable, trailing over the golden hay scattered across the floor, to the resting horses, to the walls... then to him.

He didn't look any different from the first time you had met him. He looked so unbothered by the encounter he had with you last night, despite sending you those flowers. You found it unfair, how easy it was for him to hide his emotions like that.

Karamatsu felt something on him. He turned to you, his dark eyes connecting with your own and, for a split second, the world became still. There was no noise, no movement. Just the two of you, in a single frame. He nodded towards you, his smirk morphing into a smile.

"Princess—" You jolted, catching your surprised yelp before it could leave your throat. Your brow twitched as you turned on your heel, glowering at your butler.

"What?"

"M-My apologies!" Tanuki stammered, clearing his throat. "Your steed is ready for you, Princess," the older man bowed formally, guiding you out of the stable and onto the flat grassland. A black horse, a very strong looking one at that, stood idly before you, it's equally black eyes staring into nothing.

You grabbed a hold of Tanuki, pulling him to one side as you hissed into his ear.

"Tanuki, this is ridiculous!"

"I understand, but I am afraid there is nothing I can do, Princess..."

"Yes, there is! Take me to my study room!"

"Your father ordered me to keep you here for this activity, Princess," he sighed, eyeing you sympathetically. He gently coaxed your iron grip on his arm off of him, gesturing to the horse.

"You must brave through it."

He stepped away, just as your father and Karamatsu came out of the stables atop their horses, chatting away as they manoeuvred their beasts with ease. The twinge of jealousy you had felt before came back with full force, the burning fire of competition raging within you.

With new found resolution, you stepped up to the dark horse, stopping beside the saddle. You readied your hands against the leather, placing a foot in the small holster. Then, you paused. Then, you didn't move. Taking a deep breath, you willed yourself to push upwards and to sit on the damn horse, but your body wouldn't cooperate. The chatter from behind you had died down. Your brow twitched.

"My daughter, do you need some help?" You heard your father call, but you ignored him. You tried again with a huff, pushing up with all your might, barely lifting yourself off of the ground.

"Princess..."

"I don't need help!" You denied. You hated how your face burned in embarrassment. You felt like the court jester, making a complete fool of yourself. You knew this was a bad idea. How could your father have forgotten you didn't know how to ride a horse?

"Princess [Y/N]?"

"What?!"

You frustrated comments trailed off as a gloved hand was extended towards you. You followed it up, finding Karamatsu's kind face peering down at you.

"Perhaps it would be easier if you were to ride with me, instead?"

You were confused. What made him so different from everybody else? Why was he being so nice to you? You didn't need his pity, if that's what he was doing. You didn't need him to feel sorry for you. You didn't need him at all.

And yet, looking into his eyes, you saw no ill intent. Only a shimmer of hope. Hope for what? You couldn't understand. And you always understood everything.

You grit your teeth harshly.

With heavy reluctance, you grasped his outstretched palm, eyes widening by a fraction as he easily hauled you up to sit behind him, your skirts flowing off the side of his steed. Slowly, you placed your hands on his waist, not wanting to hold and be closer to him anymore than you already were.

"...Well, then," you father cleared his throat, stunned by what he had just witnessed, "Let's set off, shall we?" He tugged at his reigns, turning around and heading down the thin trail into the castle's forest. Karamatsu glanced back at you.

"Are you ready, Princess?"

"Just go already."

He chuckled softly in response, following behind the king. You wobbled in surprise at the sudden movement of the horse, gripping onto him just a tad bit tighter.

You peered around his broad shoulders, making sure that your father was out of earshot before you leaned up to his ear. You felt him shiver at the feeling of your warm breath hitting his skin. He tightened his hold on the reigns.

"Eh—?"

"Why purple? What do you have to be sorry for?"

❀ | ⑤

╔═════ °• ♔ •° ═════╗ 𝐚 𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞 ╚═════ °• ♔ •° ═════╝

You had received no answer, much to your chagrin, and you were left to pout moodily for the majority of the ride. Your father rambled on and on about how well maintained the forest was. You were sure no one was listening.

The sudden fork in the faded trail was either a good or bad thing, there was no in-between. Pausing in your tracks, your father seemed to contemplate on something rather deeply before turning to you both with a large, suspicious smile. Your hands moved back to your lap quickly.

"It seems that we must part ways here," he caught your glare, and it was then that you knew he wasn't going to back down on this.

"No, we don't need to do that," you began hotly.

"Two horses, two paths. Each of them lead through the forest and back to the stables. It's only natural that we would separate here." He tugged at his steed's reigns, starting down the right pathway. "I'll take the shorter route back; the flat earth allows my horse to run along it faster."

You couldn't get another word in as he promptly sped away, a small dust cloud kicking up beneath the horse's hooves. You were left with the tree's aged silence, the twittering of birds and rustle of leaves keeping you grounded to the present.

"...I don't mean to add to your anger, Princess," Karamatsu started, guiding his horse to the other path, "but I was hoping that we could get some time alone like this."

"And why would you want that?" You huffed. Your brow twitched a fraction as you saw your hands had already planted themselves back onto his torso as the animal moved.

"So that I am able to answer your questions." He turned his head back to you with a smile, the sunlight filtering through the trees illuminating his upper face brightly. You were getting sick of the world painting him to be some kind of ethereal being. He was a good-for-nothing prince. Nothing more.

"Then answer them," you snarled without thinking twice about it. He nodded in agreement, turning back to focus on navigating his way through the earthy terrain, watching out for the large tree roots breaking through the dirt.

"What was the point of those flowers?"

A small silence came over Karamatsu as he furrowed his thick brows, ordering his frantic thoughts together. He wanted to answer the honest truth, but he also knew that your temper was akin to very fragile glass — touch too hard, even just a gentle brush, and the results could be shattering. Or, it wouldn't fall apart, and you wouldn't be frustrated. For a moment, his mind wandered to his younger brother. Your personalities were quite similar.

"Originally, there wasn't a point to the flowers," his words were slow and cautious, carefully putting them together as he finally came to a decision.

"I had heard in the early hours of the morning that you still hadn't awoken, and so I took a stroll around your palace garden. I've never seen such beautifully groomed blossoms before. Truly a spectacle, and I expected nothing less of this flourishing kingdom.

"It was then that I saw the hyacinths. In my kingdom, these flowers are already rare to find, and so upon seeing their vibrant colour, I couldn't help but be reminded of you."

You blinked owlishly at the back of his head.

"Rare beauty. That was my first impression of you when I first stepped out of my carriage. And, despite what you may think, our exchange under the moon's gaze did not change my perspective of you, Princess."

You were in disbelief. He must be more delusional than you thought.

"I had wanted to give you the flowers as a token to your beauty, until the one who handed me the flowers told me something interesting: the flower's meaning. I knew then that I had to give them to you, and hoped that you would understand."

...

"... You still haven't answered my question." Karamatsu stilled at your flat tone. Devoid of emotion. It was unsettling, hearing it from you. "Why are you sorry?"

"Ah, because.." he sighed heavily. "Because ever since I stepped foot here, I've caused you nothing but distress and despair. I have a feeling that you felt this way ever since our engagement was announced, too."

The forest ambiance had grown quieter. It was as if the birds had never been there at all. The sun still shone down from above, rays of sunlight lighting the way forward. The pathway curved behind the frame of a tall, wise oak tree. You were unable to see beyond it. Whatever lay ahead of you was a mystery.

"So, I apologise, Princess [Y/N]. For not being the man you had been waiting for."

"I still don't get it."

"..Come again?"

"I don't get why you're apologising. To me."

Your fingers tightened around the fabric of his shirt. Even through the clothing, you could feel that he was warm, radiating a subtle heat against your hands. You concentrate on that, hoping the tightness in your throat would go away.

"What's the point in you apologising when you haven't —" you bit your tongue, quickly rephrasing your wording, "—when you know, that nothing's going to change? Why waste your time trying to appease me?"

Rounding the large trunk, the trees ahead of you began forming a kind of leafy archway, leading to an opening out of the forest.

"I've always believed that people can change, no matter who they are," Karamatsu responded firmly. "Even though it may not seem like, the changes a person can go through can bring out such wondrous beauty. I wish to see it, if you will allow me to."

Light beamed down on the both of you as you broke through the forest finally, blinding you for a moment. Rubbing at your eyes, you slowly opened them up, sucking in a sharp breath at the sight around you.

Dazzling, bright Cala lilies flowed like a white sea with the wind, fields of them stretching for miles, as far as the eye could see. Amongst them were clusters of daisies, small and dainty petals that seemed to dance to an unheard tune.

You had never seen this field before. Never had you seen such an abundance of flowers blooming so elegantly like this. It was a sight that made your eyes widen in an almost child-like wonder. A part of you wished to jump off of your seat and run into the field, dancing along with the flowers.

"I've never seen these flowers before!" Karamatsu exclaimed excitedly. He had stopped his horse altogether, admiring the view with you. You tore your gaze away to look at him, his wide smile spreading from cheek to cheek, and his eyes sparkling in awe. He was practically glowing.

"What are they?" He turned to you.

"Cala lilies."

"I never knew lilies could take such a shape." He suddenly shifted in his seat, carefully swinging a leg over the side of the horse and jumping down onto the pathway. You watched as he strolled over to the flowers, a finger delicately stroking at its petals.

Your hands began to feel clammy. Sometimes, you cursed yourself for your expansive knowledge. An image of a textbook filtered into your mind, and you bit at your lip out of habit.

White Cala lilies. Daisies, too.

It was all just a coincidence. It had to be.

After all, you were too far gone to be given the chance to change.

❀ | ⑥

╔═════ °• ♔ •° ═════╗ 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐤 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 ╚═════ °• ♔ •° ═════╝

Setting down his teacup with a sigh, Karamatsu's gaze didn't wander from the perfect view of the gardens just behind the large windows.

It had been a few days since he had gone on that magical horse ride through the forest with you, and ever since you had arrived back at your palace, it seemed as if you had been avoiding him. Which he found to be most unfortunate, as he had found the conversation the both of you had then was heartfelt and honest, and he even thought that it had brought you two ever so slightly closer together.

Alas, he was wrong. The words you had exchanged with him had only weakened your bond and any chances at becoming closer, it seems. Now, whenever you spotted him around the palace halls, you would swiftly turn the other way and scurry off before he could get the chance to speak. He would be left in the dust of your footsteps, a hand outstretched towards your silhouette and a frown on his lips.

Karamatsu wasn't sure what to do.

His words were true; he wanted to get to know you, bit by bit. He wanted you to give him a chance, despite his reputation as a stupid and unwise prince. Despite all his flaws and imperfections, he wanted you to take his hand and walk alongside him, if not as lovers then at the very least as friends.

Clearly, however, you didn't have the same thoughts in mind.

He sighed again, much heavier this time, his sorrow almost visible in the air around him. Karamatsu had no idea what to do. He had never been in this situation before — he had never even lasted this long inside someone else's kingdom! He usually would have been kicked out, literally, as soon as he opened his mouth to speak. Although you didn't give him the kindest of welcomes, you had at least allowed him to stay. He thought that to be very kind of you.

Resting his palm against his cheek, he cast his sullen gaze to the sky. No matter what he did, his mind would always fall back to you. He would like to think it was love, but he wasn't that stupid of a prince to truly believe that.

"Prince Karamatsu?" He startled at the call of his name, sitting up straight and turning to look over his shoulder to find your mother, Queen Koume, walking steadily towards him with a kind smile. He stood up from his seat, bowing low as his signature smirk worked its way into his face.

"Queen Koume! It is truly a blessing to be in your presence."

"Likewise," she chuckled, tapping his shoulder and gesturing for him to rise, "But I think formalities can be dropped for a short while, don't you agree?"

"If that is what you wish," he flicked his sparkling cape around him, the material elegantly twirling around him before settling along his back.

"I hope you have been enjoying your stay in our kingdom," she started, moving to take a seat opposite from Karamatsu's.

"Of course! I expected nothing less from the Aoki Kingdom — full of beauty as far as the eye can see!"

Queen Koume chuckled again, silently liking the flowery words that always seemed to flow seamlessly out of the young prince's mouth. He had quite a talent for it.

"And my daughter has been treating you well?"

"Indeed! She truly is a kind and soft soul, to treat me as gently as the flowers that bloom in her wake—!"

"Then why is she not with you?"

Karamatsu stilled, eyes wide and smile stiff. He glanced over to the Queen, and upon seeing her raised brow and the suspicious squint in her eyes, he deflated, sitting himself back down and tracing a finger around the rim of his teacup.

"How long has she been avoiding you?"

"...Almost three days, now..."

She sighed, her eyes falling to her folded hands in her lap. A few moments of silence go by, and she interrupts it with her soft voice.

"I would like to apologise for my daughter. She has always found it difficult to bond with those from outside our kingdom."

"No, no, I understand her completely." Karamatsu shook his head, a small smile on his lips that didn't quite meet his eyes. "I am a prince from the kingdom of Akatsuka. We are known for our unwillingness to become kings and our poor knowledge on royal duties. I'm not surprised that she wouldn't want anything to do with me... It is something that I have become used to."

"But it is not something you deserve."

He paused, slowly raising his eyes to meet hers.

"Appearances are a struggle for royals to upkeep, because it is the only thing that others are willing to look at. When I look at you, Karamatsu, I don't look at the failure of a prince. I look at the heart you wear on your sleeve."

Karamatsu's cheeks tinged a light pink, her knowing smile making it hard to look away.

"When others look at my daughter, they see a cold and silent girl, with her head full of pride and her eyes full of malice. But when you look at her, tell me, what do you see?"

"...What do I see...?"

He saw a beautiful girl with a heart that was closed off to the world in fear of getting hurt. He saw a girl who spoke her mind without the fear of the opinions of others. He saw a girl with a strong and matured mind with a young, caring heart, a weakness that she didn't want to expose. Because if it ever was, her world would crumble around her.

Queen Koume stood up, walking around the small table to reach Karamatsu, placing a delicate hand on his shoulder. He looked up at her with wide eyes, akin to a child. Her fondness for him grew.

"Talk to her. She will try to run, but don't let her out of your reach."

With those words, she left him to his thoughts, disappearing around the corner. Karamatsu's mind was onto telling him one thing.

'I need to see her.'

He bolted from his seat, running down the hallways in an aimless attempt to find you. As he passed by the entrance to the gardens, he skidded to a halt, rushing over to one of the gardeners who was busy pruning a bush of purple and blue flowers.

"Excuse me!" He called, standing over them. "If you would be so kind, I need some assistance with a gift." He gestured to the flowers around him, his thick brows furrowed into a pleading frown. The gardener stared up at him in shock before relaxing into a grin.

"Of course! I have the perfect gift."

He clipped a hefty bunch of the flowers in front of him, grabbing a ribbon from his pocket and tying it around the stems into a neat bow.

"Hydrangeas. For anything that is sincerely heartfelt." He winked, handing them over to the prince.

"Wonderful! Thank you!" Karamatsu turned on his heel to run off, only to then back around with a sheepish grin. "Do you know where I can find the Princess?"

"She usually hides herself away in the library. But you didn't hear that from me!"

"Thank you!" He called again over his shoulder as he dashed off, coloured petals drifting around him as the wind carried them away. A woman peeked around one of the hedges, grinning down at the gardener.

"Playing Cupid, are we?" She chuckled.

"That's all on him," he shrugged. The both of them watched a blue blur run off into the distance, mentally sending him the best of luck before returning to their tasks.

Karamatsu ran as fast as his legs could carry him, barely making it down the right corridors until he came to a stumbling halt in front of a large set of double doors, the wood engraved with ivory stems curling around bookshelves. This was the place.

He took a moment to catch his breath, brushing his hair back into place with his hand and gathering the courage before opening the doors with a firm push, pausing as they revealed a vast library filled to the brim with books and rolled parchment.

He glanced around as he walked in, scanning every empty table and chair until he came across a set of stairs spiralling upwards, swallowing thickly as he ascended, one slow step at a time.

His heart was thundering in his chest as he reached the top, almost fit to burst as he finally saw your figure hunched over a pile of books that were opened up and spread along the floor, your studious gaze stuck the words on the pages of text until the sound of his footsteps made you look up in surprise.

Your eyes met his, wide and unsuspecting. Karamatsu's heart sped up, skipping a beat as he saw your skin becoming flushed in shock, his own cheeks matching the reddening tint that was spreading across your face.

Neither of you could speak, finding yourselves speechless. You always had something to say, but now, sitting there and peering up at the man you had been attempting to push away for days now, you found that your throat had run dry, and your lips slightly parted, searching for words that couldn't escape you.

You watched as he took careful steps forward, kneeling down in front of you on one knee to reach your eye level, his brown eyes never once leaving yours.

In his arms, he carried clusters of hydrangeas, swirling colours of blue and purple, and your heart jumped. It startled you; it was if it had leapt up your throat.

He held them out to you, a determined glint in his eyes.

"Princess [Y/N]."

His words were firm but gentle, enough to get you to stay, and enough to tell you that there was nothing stopping you from leaving. Even so, you found yourself unable to move.

"These flowers are for you. I hope these will suffice as a gift, in exchange for a chance to speak with you."

❀ | ⑦

╔═════ °• ♔ •° ═════╗

𝐋𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐞. 𝐀𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧.

╚═════ °• ♔ •° ═════╝

Hugging the flowers to your chest, you attempted (quite poorly, if you were being honest) to hide your flushed cheeks and pouty lips from the man before you, stuffing the lower half of your face into the petals and taking a deep breath. You couldn't deny the heavenly smell of the blossoms, your vision now slightly obscured by a mesh of various blue hues, the colour that you could only now associate with one person.

Karamatsu couldn't help but to watch you in silence, his dark eyes admiring the way your petite hands clasped themselves around the cut stems, your shoulders and clavicle exposed to the soft light filtering into the small space your dress, though now they were covered in dainty petals as you pressed the bouquet closer to yourself. His mind began to fill with all sorts of ways to describe your elegance and beauty, wanting to remove the white cloth covering his fingers so that he could run his bare fingers over your skin and tresses.

Clearing his throat quietly, he rid his mind of these thoughts as best as he could and licked his slightly dried lips, preparing himself to speak.

"Princess--"

"You--"

The both of you froze, Karamatsu's cheeks darkening at the sound of your voice chiming in alongside his, as did yours, though you were grateful you had the flowers so that he couldn't see this. With a small gesture of his hand, the prince urged you to speak first, to which you shifted uncomfortably in your place, eyes stuck on the flowers bunched in your hands.

"...You didn't need to bring a gift to speak with me, you know," you began quietly, the usual bite behind your words gone as you avoided your original sentence for the time being. "We're not the kind of royals who demand items in exchange for words."

"I am aware," Karamatsu smiled softly, hoping it would encourage you to keep talking with him the way you were doing so now. "Even so, I felt it was necessary if I am to convey these words to you."

"Which are...?" Oddly, your heart began to thud against your chest in anticipation, watching the way his hand moved to run lightly over his coloured streaks of hair before settling it over his chest, looking into your eyes with his rich brown orbs.

"I would like to become closer with you."

The words tumbling from his lips left you in surprise, eyes widening as he continued.

"The same way we did that day we travelled through the forest on horseback, I wish to do that again with you. I must admit, it felt nice to be able to bond with someone after facing so much rejection from other royals I have briefly acquainted..." A quiet huff of laughter left him at that.

"However, I understand that you do not wish to go through with this engagement, and I do not want to force you into yet another unfortunate circumstance," His words became softer, the smile on his lips becoming solemn at its corners as he lowered his gaze, hand pressing firmer against his chest. "So, even if we do not become close as husband and wife, then at the very least, having you as a friend would still warm my heart nonetheless."

Though his heart ached, he knew it would be for the best. Cutting things off earlier into whatever relationship the two of you had begun to form would be much easier, even if it was still painful for Karamatsu to do such a thing. Truthfully, he didn't want to leave, he didn't want to have to give up on you, but if it was something you wanted, he couldn't force anything. Love and friendship are delicate things, preciously moulded by the hands of those who are willing to move forward, and you...

"I don't want you to leave."

Karamatsu's head snapped up, mouth slightly agape as he questioned whether he had heard you correctly, or if he had imagined your words. The crimson staining the tips of your ears and dusting your shoulders told him otherwise. You couldn't meet his eyes, pointing them down towards the few books still laying open and your eyes catching onto the delicately coloured sketch of a baby pink larkspur, the layers bunching together like the skirt of a ball gown.

"I don't... want you to leave," you breathed, squeezing your eyes shut in hopes that it would help you concentrate on what you were saying and not on Karamatsu's twinkling eyes. "I'm sure you've realised this by now, but I'm not used to having such conversations anyone, not even my own parents... Vulnerability has made me weak in the past, and now I believe that becoming hostile towards others is just second nature to me."

A small lull in your voice came and went, ears sensitive to his quiet breaths, and you wondered if he was even breathing at all as he hung onto your every word.

"I know I can't hide away like this forever. I look like more of a coward than anything else, at this point," you sighed. "I know I don't deserve it, but if... if you could..."

This feeling inside of you was so foreign to you. It made you hesitant, made you scared, made you want to back out at the last possible moment, but you knew if you did such a thing you wouldn't get a chance like this ever again - and that thought hurt you more than you thought it would. Swallowing your shallow pride, you forced the words out of your mouth, ignoring that snide voice in the back of your mind telling you to give up already.

"If you could find it in yourself to forgive me for my actions... for what I've said to you... then maybe we could start this over. I want to be patient with you, the same way you have been patient with me."

"... As friends?"

Karamatsu may have been too hopeful, but he wanted to hear it from you nonetheless.

"... Wherever it goes, I don't think I would mind as much." You tried to stay nonchalant about it, though the sudden flush of heat over your skin at the sight of Karamatsu's broad and genuine smile made you fumble, and once you locked eyes, neither of you could bring yourselves to look away. Feeling bold, the prince raised both of his hands and placed them around your own, surrounding them with warmth, the sensation of his gloves brushing against your skin sending a shiver up your spine.

"Thank you, princess." He breathed quietly, the soothing baritone of his voice low for your ears only.

"F-For what?" you responded just the same, the fragrance of hydrangeas now surrounding you both, intoxicatingly sweet.

"For giving me a chance."

I FEIN FOR A FULL FIC ABOUT PRINCESS!READER WRITTING IN HER DIRAY S'SO CUTE LIKE

yeesss OFC!! ignore any mistakes sorrriii ˚ ༘✶ ｡˚ ⁀➷ princess!reader w - mentions of sex, p in v, rafe making it up to you through sleepy sex!!

your nighttime self-care routine sometimes included needing to write in your diary the things you wouldn't dare say out loud. you sat on your side of the bed with the dim warm light illuminating the room while rafe took a shower. often doing all your skincare, shower stuff, and oral care before rafe so that after you can let it all marinate before sleeping. you grab your pink fluffy pen from your nightstand to start your journaling. 

dear diary, today was so totally not great, rafe ended up leaving me this morning to play golf with the boys even after he promised to take me to martino's to get some tea cakes that i've been craving for the past week!! AND on top of that, i missed a hair appointment since rafe had the car all day and he's like my boyfriend chauffeur!! this blows!! i hate him and he will not be given kisses or sex until further notice. 

rafe walks out of the bathroom, with a towel around his waist, his hair all wet, and droplets of water running down his muscles. the view almost makes you forget why you were pissed at him in the first place, but then you quickly snap out of it when you remember you are supposed to be "ranting" in your diary. 

"whatcha doin'?" rafe asks, making you look over at him, he's put on some comfy pajama pants and sat down on his side of the bed, leaning over to look at what you are writing. 

"i'm doing self-care, it's my de-stress diary." 

"why do you need a diary? that's what i'm here for, tell your secrets to me." he shrugs and leans closer to really read what's on the pages. 

"nuh uh, somethings i would say aren't lady-like." you bring the diary to your chest to prevent him from reading it. 

"hey, lemme see. i'm basically entitled to read your diary, it's a boyfriend's right."

"no baby that's just an invasion of privacy." you giggle which makes him huff.

"okay well we promised no secrets, so give it here." he reaches for the diary, you roll your eyes and give up, handing it to him. 

"fine, but i should not be held accountable for what i wrote, its girl stuff."

"aww shit baby, i forgot about martino's, i'm sorry," he remembers as he beings to read what you wrote. "no sex or kisses until further notice? that's fuckin' ridiculous kid." he furrows his eyebrows while he's reading. 

"mm-hmm, it's not like you'd notice anyways since you've been so "busy" recently." you exaggerate and roll your eyes.

"don't roll your eyes at me, fix your attitude." he points at you scoldingly which only makes you pout and reach for the diary again. 

"if you think you really need this then fine, but no more talking shit about me in there. use your words." he closes the little book and hands it back to you. 

"i did." 

"you know what i mean." 

"i can't say it to your face." you shake your head and place the diary on your nightstand. 

"yes, you can." he wraps his arms around you and pulls you closer to him, your back to his bare chest. 

"you smell really good." you sigh, wishing you could just give in and climb on top of him.

"thank you, baby. so do you." he kisses your bare shoulder, slipping down the thin strap of your silky nightgown. 

"but i'm still mad at you."

"rant to me then."

you sigh again, "you forgot that today was supposed to be our day, you suck and if you really loved me you wouldn't have done that." you exaggerate again. 

"i know princess, i know, and i'm sorry but i do love you so don't even start." your boyfriend chides, look back at him and he takes the opportunity to kiss the corner of your mouth. 

"no rafe, no kissing."

"don't be brat, i'll make it up to you. take you to martino's first thing tomorrow and i'll take you to do your hair, how'bout i fuck you to sleep nice n' slow right now? hmm?" he places his hand on the side of your face to bring you closer so he can press a kiss to your cheek. 

"mmhm ohkay, be gentle." you nod, rafe just grins and attacks you with soft kisses all over your lips, jaw and neck.

"just relax baby, lay down i'll do all the work." rafe extends his arm to reach over to your nightstand light to turn it off, now the only light coming in is the moonlight streaming in through the balcony windows. you lay back against the mattress, head hitting the pillows and rafe lifts the thin dress above your hips. never really wearing panties under your nightgown while you sleep, he rubs your bare pussy with the pads of two of his big fingers. rafe pulls himself out, also not wearing any boxers under the plaid pajama pants to sleep, and lines himself up to slowly push in, you wine and dig your nails into his biceps. 

"shshsh....you're fine." your boyfriend soothes as he begins to slowly and gently stretch you out, giving you a few wet kisses on your neck. the way he smells and feels on top of you makes you feel so warm and sleepy, that your eyes begin to fall closed as he thrusts into you very softly.

"i love you," you whisper, wrapping your arms around his neck to make you feel closer to him even though he's balls deep inside you right now. 

"i love you more princess, jus' fall asleep, i've got you."

NEW YOU, JAKE SIM.

pairing jake sim + afab!reader.

genre fluff, angst, smut.

summary all hell breaks loose when you, the heir to the throne, decides to run away to begin a new life. luckily, you experience a surprise encounter with jake sim, which brings upon freeing adventures and sprouts a taboo relationship between a princess, and a poor criminal.

word count 10.7k (unedited).

warnings i’m sorry for the beomgyu slander 😔, jake refers to reader as princess as much as he can really, suicide mentions, family toxicity, NSFW MINORS DNI!!! (fingering fem!receiving, handjob, oral male!receiving, unprotected sex, light choking), death mentions.

an tis here!! took me awhile but i always prevail. ty for all the support <3

Royalty never lived up to the expectations that outsiders had anticipated. None of the money, gowns and experiences would live up to what those people would always have — complete freedom.

They could travel whenever they desired, do what activities they desired, be with who they desired; ultimately being who they wanted to be. You were stuck on the inside of a kingdom, and despite its tremendous size, it could never live up to the feeling of adventuring outside of the castle walls.

You had been unsure what you had done wrong to deserve something so terrible, but you had been enforced into a marriage that you would never agree to. In fact, they were so enthralled by this marriage, that you were not allowed to leave the premises so you couldn't meet anyone else until you had fallen in love.

Though, you don't think anyone could fall in love with Choi Beomgyu. He was idiotic, vain, rude and every other possible negative adjective you could think of. Even those who matched his asininity would barely be able to cope in his presence.

However, you sense you're the only one who doesn't fall for his 'charms' since everyone else seems to fawn over him whenever he appeared. Of course, you had to be the one who would in be betrothed to him in the end.

You had simply had enough.

As it was, you weren't a fan of your life before the marriage had been finalised. You weren't suited to the position of a queen nor did you want to follow that lifestyle. All that you wanted was the opportunity to be free.

What could be any better than making a plan to run away?

This was probably the fifth ball you had attended this month; you weren't sure why they had them so much, because they all had the same step-by-step procedure as if it was some form of experiment.

You would watch as your parents made their way around, greeting the same people, the same way, as if they hadn't seen each other a week ago. It was comedy-worthy how absolutely fake every single person here had been.

Within minutes of being there, you had already made your way over to the buffet table where your only friend, Julia, had been encouraged (practically scolded by your mother) to stand.

Her mother had been your babysitter as a child since it was rare your parents would find the time to actually spend any moments with you. Julia was the same age, so had grew up alongside you. It was interesting how opposite both of your lives had turned out to be despite being brought up by the same person, just with different blood.

"God, this is just as boring as I'd imagine it to be. Look at them all, it's like a food chain. I'm shocked nobody had cracked yet." You stand next to her, avoiding the gaze of everybody else in the room as you usually would.

"You shouldn't speak that way, you never know who is listening in." Julia had always been nervous when it came to your public conversation, considering she'd likely receive more of a punishment then you would, however, she leans into you more, "I would have to agree though. I could not point out a singular person who genuinely looks interested in their conversation."

"I mean, look at that herd of girls over there. They've been squawking with each other all evening, but I definitely saw Emily pointing fingers at Destiny last week." You nod your head towards the group that stood near the entrance, all chatting with one another as if they wouldn't talk behind each other's backs any other time of day.

Your eyes shift along, expecting to find another group of people to roll your eyes at, instead encountering quite a surprise. There's a servant that you don't quite recognise; brown shaggy hair, the same familiar white uniform that appears to be loose fitting, but seems to still look just right.

Surely, you think, you would have remembered someone like him.

"Julia, do you recognise him? I'm not quite sure he's ever been here before." You ask, she looks in your direction with furrowed brows as she takes in the man that you're looking at. She squints her eyes, thinking, then shakes her head.

He hadn't done anything to imply he was up to something suspicious, but you had a strange feeling about him. Feeling entranced by him, you try to think of a normal excuse so that you could speak with him — but your parents get to you first.

"Darling! Where have you been? We have been looking for you everywhere!" She beams at you, rather fabricated considering her eyes seem to be filled with annoyance since you had been staying distant from her the entire ball.

Unfortunately for you, Beomgyu slides into the conversation with his horrifically flirtatious smile that only forms disgust in your mind. He takes your hand, placing a kiss on it; Julia stifles a laugh when you side-eye her.

"It's nice to see you again, my love." He smirks at you, your mother almost clapping her hands in excitement as she watches, "Care to dance?"

Your mind searches for any excuse to refuse his offer, but your mother's fiery gaze barely gives you the option to think. You hate to be like everyone else in the room, but you give your best smile and place your hand into his.

Considering this would be your last time making your mother happy, you may as well allow it to happen.

The moment you reach your bedroom, you fall into your bed with a long groan. To be expected, the dress and makeup had taken at least an hour to remove, reaching almost one AM by the time you were in your chamber.

Minutes later, Julia wanders in her room for her 'nightly duties' — gossiping with you after a exhausting day. She conforms to you, jumping on your bed as you had.

"You look worn out- well, I'm not surprised after that." When she says that, you know she's referring to the excruciating dance that you had the dishonour (to yourself) of taking part in, "How was that enchanting dance?"

"I'm not sure if he was nervous or it was just natural, but his hands were incredibly sweaty! Normally I wouldn't judge, but surely you wouldn't hold someone's hand for that long when they're practically slipping off." Julia bursts into laughter at your response, tears spilling from her eyes.

You're going to miss Julia. In honesty, she was the only person that could keep you here and you wish you could take her with you. It would be too dangerous and risky, so you would have to give her the best.

"Julia... I was hoping you could help me with something." You take your bottom lip between your teeth and she looks at you expectingly, eyes boring into yours, "I'm really not sure how you will take this thought of mine, but it's truly what I think will be the best. I want to leave, and go far way."

Her mouth opens, no words to be spoken but it is clear she has many things to say.

"I know I should have mentioned my feelings to you earlier, and I am sorry for my selfishness. This is something I need, and I want your help, if you could." You look at her with hope, praying that there was something that she could do for you.

She sighs.

"I know a way that you'll be able to leave, quite easily." She states, she watches as your eyes light up and you become more absorbed in the conversation, "I know that they don't allow you to go into the basement of the castle. It's because there's a passageway through and door that leads through to the outside. It hasn't been used in many years."

In your mind, you recall every time someone had tensed up or began stuttering over their words whenever you got too close to that basement door. It was as if they knew that you had been planning to do something drastic, such as running away.

"How on earth would I get there if they're so cautious about me going in? It doesn't sound too wise." You sit up from your previous position, walking over to your wooden desk to take a seat. Allowing your head to fall into your hands, you question whether this was possible.

"Well... At particular times of the day, the guards leave their stations. Usually during your late dinners, actually- and around 4AM in the morning when they begin preparing for you to awake. If you can get out of the diner tonight, I'll show you." She whispers under her breath at you, just in case anyone had been deciding to listen in at the wrong time.

You have never hugged someone as tightly as you had with Julia. Within minutes, you had gone from having zero idea of how to get to your own paradise to having a knight in shining armour that so happened to be your best friend.

The dinners with your family were the worst part of being a royal; you had to spend an extended amount of time with them. Despite being your blood, they never felt like they were. Realistically, they likely didn't care for you that much, you were created for an alliance.

Even if it hadn't been explicitly stated, there was no doubts that it was the reality.

If you had to admit anything, the dining hall was gorgeous. The walls are as tall as can be, painted portraits and landscapes scattering every wall. Candles are sporadically placed around the room, as well as in the large hanging chandelier.

However, the gigantic table in the centre just made the dinners much more awkward.

"I see you talked with Prince Beomgyu at the last ball. I'm glad the two of you are getting along well." Your father speaks up for the first time during your dinner and to no surprise, it's involving mentions of your 'future' marriage partner.

"Barely..." You mumble under your breath, just loud enough for them to be able to hear, but low enough that they were unable to tell it was intentional.

You needed a reason to be able to leave, since they would never allow you to go to your room when you wanted to. On many occasions, you remember how whenever you argued or became upset, they would just let you to leave so they would't have to acknowledge the needed confrontation.

"Why can't you just be kind to him? He has done nothing but treat you right and you have hardly said one word to him." Your mother places her cutlery down and glares at you, as if you were someone she had become enemies with.

Just one more day.

"Me and all the other women he has been trying to court. I'm going to bed, I'm not hungry anymore." You retort back, standing up and storming your way out of the room. As expected, they don't follow you or say a word.

Quickly, you walk back to your room to see Julia already waiting inside for you, "We have to move fast. We have enough time but I'd rather we get in and out so we don't get caught, if all goes well, you could get out tonight." Julia grins with mixed emotion; ecstatic you're finally getting what you deserve, upset that she'll likely never see you again.

"I don't think I could ever thank you enough, I love you, Julia." You want to give her another tight hug, but there is not enough time in the day. Instead, she pulls you along to take you to the sacred basement floor.

Your heart thumps harshly in your chest as you stand in front of the door. Julia pushes it open slowly to avoid loud creaks and squeaks.

As slow as you can, you walk down the stone stairs that lead down to the basement. It is barely lit, just bright enough to be able to see where you are placing your feet on the stairs. Eventually, you reach a dingy room that is filled with miscellaneous items.

"I... don't see a door anywhere." Your eyebrows furrow as you walk around the room, squinting through the darkness in order to try and find this supposed door. In fact, you don't think you can see any other way out of the basement apart from the door you had entered from.

"It's hidden for a reason, look here." Julia remarks, you turn around to look at where she is standing. She taps her foot onto a particular area of the floor, which appears to sound more hollow than the rest of it.

The floor isn't easy to see, so you get onto your knees in order to touch around, feeling how the stone flooring feels like wood instead. With a large grin, you stand up and hug Julia one last time.

"You go back to your room now so that they don't see you down here, I can think of an excuse for myself if anything happens. It's already unlocked and goes straight out." She pulls back, her hand resting on your cheek, "If this is the last I see of you, I appreciate everything you've done for me. You're my closest friend and I hope I'll get to see you again in the future, much happier than you are now."

When your eyes begin to fill with water, you make your way back up the stairs and towards your bedroom and attempting to look as innocent as possible. Patiently, you watch the hours on the clock go by.

You begin to feel like the moment isn't real; not when it reaches 3AM and your hands are shaking against your door handle. The large door feels more intimidating than usual, as if it had started to grow along with your draining anxiety throughout the waiting process.

Hastily, you move through the many corridors without giving another thought because you may just second guess yourself and decide this was not your smartest idea.

As Julia has reassured you, you didn't bump into any of the royal guards — you realise they aren't the greatest, since they appeared to be nowhere in sight. You likely could have done this months ago when you began considering the idea.

This is the quietest you had ever heard the expanse of the castle to be, if it had been this way all the time, you would have liked it more. Instead, you were stuck with the family talking your ears off every second like nails on a chalk board.

You reach the basement, feeling around on the floor until you find the door again. A proud smile appears on your face when you feel the handle, though as you're pulling it up, someone or something on the other side seems to be opening it too.

"Huh?" You gasp out, almost flinging backwards when the door opens at lightening speed, revealing a very familiar face, "It's you!"

You remember him perfectly, his face was hard to forget. Opposed to his clean appearance when you had seen him at the ball, he looks muckier and he definitely wasn't wearing royal attire this time.

"Who the hell are you?" His expression displays confusion and his voice is almost aggressive, as if he isn't the one coming in from the outside; despite the tone, the thick accent that is diversely different from your own sticks out to you clearly. No one in the area sounded as he did.

"Me? Why on earth are you sneaking into the castle? Do you have a death wish?" You whisper-shout at him, mirroring his distress towards you. He doesn't respond, looking just as baffled as you are, "How long have you been doing this for? God, the security here is dreadful."

Suspecting you had been too loud because the man before you interrupted the original plan, as you had likely done to him, the sound of feet thundering above you caused your stomach to drop and your body to freeze up.

"Shit, shit, shit!" His eyes widen and he examines the room, biting his bottom lip when he can't think of anything. He sighs and puts his attention back on you, "Whatever you're doing, make your decision now or you're dead meat. You're lucky I'm in a good mood today."

He holds his hand out towards you, urging you to take it so he can help you down into the pathways below you. After a mere thought of going back and the sound of banging on the basement door, you close your eyes and take his hand into yours.

The path becomes a blur the faster he pulls you through, but you feel a weight lift of your shoulders the further you are away from that door. Finally, you feel the cold breeze of the outside, a simple experience that you had not truly felt in many months.

You don't think you could explain to another human how incredible you felt in the moment, and with the adrenaline pumping through your body you couldn't feel any better.

Eventually, your running comes to a halt when you're dragged into a run-down cottage hidden behind moss, grown out leaves and grass. It's nothing, minuscule, compared to your old home, but you like it.

Funnily, you had almost forgotten about the man who had saved your skin, now panting with his hands on his knees. He stands straight after a minute or so, looking you in your eyes that are as wide as a deers in front of headlights.

"This, uh, this isn't where I live. I just come here when I finish up my business, which you impolitely interrupted. You want to tell me what you were doing? You seemed pretty desperate to get out of there." He walks over to a desk next to the bed, which was on the verge of falling apart, and pulls out a handkerchief from the open draw.

Even though his own face was covered in dirt and sweat, he makes his way over to you and dabs away at whatever had made its way onto yours. Then, he shoves it into his back pocket before stepping back from you.

"I'd much rather know your name first. You know, you don't make yourself appear very trustworthy being so sneaky." You fold your arms over each other, giving him an accusatory look. In return, he just laughs and you look away so you wouldn't feel hypnotised by his smile.

"You're very feisty. I'm Jake, Jaeyun, whatever you want to call me. Now, you." Now knowing his name, you think that it fits him flawlessly; you wouldn't attach any other name to his pretty face.  There is a chair next to the desk which he pulls out to take a seat on, pointing his hand out towards the bed.

You noticed he had a habit of using gestures instead of his words.

"Well Jake, it's nice to meet you." The bed isn't comfy at all, but you know you should appreciate there is even one in front of you in the first place, "I needed to leave, my parents didn't really put me in the best situation, so I took it upon myself to get out of it before it was too late."

"Well, shit. You're the princess aren't you? You're worth a lot of money, you know." When you don't laugh, eyes somehow becoming even wider than they were previously, he shakes his head while he stands to place a hand on your shoulder, "I'm joking, don't look so terrified. The bed won't be up to your standards, but you're free to sleep and we'll figure something out for you in the morning."

"What about you? Mustn't you sleep?" You question, you still feel uncomfortable sitting on the bed, not wanting to attempt to sleep while he is wide awake near you. Not that you didn't trust him, but it only made you feel more awkward.

"I'll be okay. Don't worry, I'm not going to chuck you out while you're sleeping, you can breathe. And don't be so tense, you can trust me, princess." He grins at you, the light from the lantern made him look ethereal, though your heart still beats fast with conflicted feelings.

The conversation ends there, he turns the chair around the face the desk which was opposite the bed. You aren't sure what he is doing, but you feel better with him looking away. Hesitatingly, you find yourself falling into a light sleep, being awoken by the slightest noise.

You don't sleep very well that night.

The pain in your back is hard to ignore, you aren't so used to having such a springy and old bed. For a second, you expect to see Julia opening up the door to your chamber, but you are instead met with Jake walking back through the rusty door.

"Good morning, princess. I brought you some new clothing back, I imagine that cute nightgown of yours isn't so comfortable for the day." Jake holds up some clothing, what your parents would refer to as 'peasant attire'. You can feel your cheeks heat up since you had forgotten you had left wearing your nightgown in a rush.

"Thank you... for the- for the fresh clothing. I appreciate your kindness." Happily, you take the clothing from his hands. They're warm, as if they had been laid in front of a fireplace for a few hours. The new feeling of warmth after having to be used to the cruel, cold cottage brings you joy.

"No worries, sweetheart. I have a proposition for you when you're ready." You reply silently to him, with a nod of the head, then leave to go into what appears to be a bathroom.

In the mirror, you see what the last day had done to you. There's only specs of dirt left on your face, you imagine it had been significantly worse before Jake had cleared it away. Bags under your eyes show clear, causing you to let out a long sigh.

Having to get used to no longer being pampered and cared for anymore was looking harder than you anticipated. You had barely considered the cons of your actions. After a few moments of processing the past day and making yourself appear more presentable, you leave the bathroom to see Jake waiting for you, reading a book.

"I can take you somewhere that's alot safer than here. It's probably not what you want at the moment, but it's probably the best you're going to get for now." Jake places the book down and diverts his eyes to you. His eyes rack over your body, not in a sexual manner, just to examine the fitting of the clothing.

"Could you tell me what you meant by 'business'? I haven't associated myself with those people for a long time, so I won't get you into any trouble. I don't mean to intrude, but you practically know my story." Anxiously, your hands clasp in front of you and you can't bring yourself to look at him in the eyes yet.

"Well, I guess I'll trust you. Me and my family aren't very well off, if you couldn't tell. It's not east to get jobs, and even the boys who do have jobs barely get a penny." He sighs, you begin to feel bad for asking, "Surprisingly, assigned waiters and waitresses get paid enough for us to afford what we need and I'm nimble enough to get in there and fake the job. I wouldn't have done it without Julia."

Your brain short-circuits and your head shoots up to look at Jake. Confused, he looks between you and the wall at the sudden change in body language, waiting for you to speak.

"Julia? You know Julia? We were close and she never mentioned you, she even acted like she didn't know you when I asked. Did she not trust me?" Your eyebrows furrow as you start to question yourself, and everything that you had experienced.

Jake only grins at your concern and shakes his head in disagreement.

"She was always so cautious, I did tell her not to bring this up, I'm sure she was worried of others listening. She helped me- alot. Wouldn't have done any of this without her.” He reassures you, the two of you decide to end this particular conversation there.

Thinking back to his proposition, you collect whatever you have left of your belongings and place them into a straw bag which had been placed next to the bed. Jake nods towards the door with a barely noticeable smile.

The door opens and you wince at the sun burning into your eyes. It radiates through your skin when you take your first step outside. Your hands grip harder onto the bag as you follow behind Jake to your next stop in your journey.

Neither of you take it upon yourself to start conversations. You don't have a problem with him and he has no issues with you, but it's obvious that there was a silent agreement that you would try and help each other and part ways.

At least that was how you had taken the last few hours. This was a new, blooming path for you, and you couldn't allow anyone to hold you back. No matter how much you may start to enjoy Jake's company, he had a family he cared deeply for and you had places you wanted to go.

After an hour or two, stopping off for the occasional rest, you encounter another cottage. Larger than the last, and taken care of. Flowers grow all around in bright colours, the brick the cottage is made out of being painted a gorgeous beige and darkened smoke peering out of the chimney.

After being at awe at how beautiful you found the cottage to be, you then see two younger boys tending to a garden filled with various fruits and vegetables. They look up, confused by your presence, but their faces light up once they see Jake.

"Jae, You're back! We were starting to get a little worried about you." They both come running towards Jake, diving into his arms as he hugs them closely to his body. You can't help but smile at the love for each other that beams from them — you almost begin to feel jealous.

"I have a come back rate of 100%, I'm invincible at this point, Won." Jake places light kisses on the top of their heads, and then their attention lands on the elephant in the room, you, "Yeah, uh, this is a recent friend of mine."

Once you give your name to his brothers, they seem to put the puzzle pieces together. The taller ones jaw drops while the other's eyebrows fall into anger.

"Sim Jaeyun what the hell have you gotten yourself into! Heeseung is going to be furious!"

Heeseung was in fact furious.

The eldest had spent about twenty minutes stalking around the cottage's main room rebuking Jake for doing something so impulsive, like allowing the runaway princess to take refuge in their home without speaking with the rest of them.

You almost stood up to leave them alone due to feeling rude and awkward, but Jake and his brother’s Jongseong and Riki were adamant on letting you stay since you had nowhere else to go. Somehow, they convinced the rest of them.

Over the month you had been living with the seven boys, something in your mind had switched. In such a short amount of time, all of them had become prominent figures in your life and it felt like you had been there forever.

One thing that you couldn't push through was the different between how you felt about Jake compared to the rest of his brothers. The touches between you both always lingered longer and you would always notice the way he would watch you while Jungwon taught you how to correctly tend to the garden.

It was a quiet day, most of the boys were tired and taking the hours to rest, most of them sleeping apart from Sunoo who silently read a book at the dining table, and you who had been sowing away to a shirt Sunghoon had accidentally ripped.

The constant silence, apart from the sound of pages turning and the fire crackling, was broken by a loud yawn as Jake opens his bedroom door. Sunoo doesn't spare him a glance, but you look up from your needle and thread to give the man a sweet smile.

"Good morning- well, afternoon, princess." He beams, making his way over to you. Both of his hands lay on either side of your shoulders and it takes everything in you not to tense up at the sudden touch.

"What did I say about calling me princess, Jaeyun?" You murmur, still trying to concentrate on the shirt in front of you. Jake's head is now placed upon yours, and you wonder if he's trying to or is blissfully unaware that he's flustering you to the highest degree.

"That I should stop calling you princess- but it suits you so well! And I think you should keep calling me Jaeyun, I like it." He replies, you roll your eyes and give up with your task. Jake moves away from you, so you turn around in your chair to face him.

"I'll think about it." You smirk at him, he opts to sit next to you and lay his head onto the table as if he had still been tired, "I thought you would be sleeping all day."

"Well... I was wondering if you wanted to take a ride in our sailing boat. I could teach you how to use it. It's too warm for me to sleep." He responds, his head being hidden in his arms consequently leaves you unable to see the pink shade that spreads across his cheeks.

"That would be nice, I've always wanted go ride in a boat- my parents never let me do anything." Finishing up, you finally stand from the chair to stretch your legs, cracking your fingers due to the ache in them.

"You can do anything that you want now. They'll always be looking for you, but we can get you far enough that they won't be able to find you." Jake purses his lips, looking away from you before continuing, "Though you’re always welcome to stay here."

"You know that I can't." You hadn't meant to sound so cold.

Jake becomes more and more despondent every time you reject his offer of staying with him. The others boys had grown fond of you, just as he had, you were safe and free from the sickening hold of your biological family.

Alas, you wanted excitement over tranquility.

The lake behind the house could have been the most perfect sight. Somehow, the water had stayed as clean as it could be, you could see the bottom of the shallow areas. What you liked the most was the natural decoration of trees and flowers, moments like this could convince you to stay.

As expected, the boat is still attached to the pier. It was rare they ever used it, often just fishing from the pier itself, but the warm day warranted a little change.

You and Jake walk side by side in a comfortable silence, something the two of you had grew to enjoy. Over years, you had gotten used to constantly being surrounded by noise that the serenity of the cottage on rest days felt strange — you never got rest days.

At first, any kind of silence was uncomfortable, though you hardly realised it had become pleasant.

Jake gets into the boat, holding out his hand to carefully help you in. He leans over to reach for the oars, and you take a seat across from him, "How am I supposed to teach you from all the way over there?"

"Where else am I supposed to go?" You raise an eyebrow at him. He shows off a flirtatious smirk and pats the little area that is left in front of him.

Jake did a brilliant job at making you frantic; you'd never experienced a relationship such as this, apart from Beomgyu, who you would rather never hear of again.

Slowly, you take your seat in front of him, back pressed snugly against his warm chest.

"Hold tight, I'll hold my hands over yours and show you how to do it properly." The two of you seem to be holding hands a lot lately. He tries to hold your hands as daintily as he could to ensure his tight grip wouldn't hurt you, and begins to row, "You're a natural."

"I guess I'm simply just good at everything." You joke, and you finally let the stiffness in your body go, moving with your thoughts to distract yourself, "I wonder how Julia is doing... I feel awful for having to leave her."

You had worried for Julia every single day. There had been no news, at least not that the boys had heard of yet; by now, you expected a large-scale search where guards and soldier would be loitering around every corner, but not one had been seen in the area. You wondered if she was safe.

"You had no choice. I'll always wish her the best, she really did everything she could for me, for us. We had a real hard time last year." He replies, staring off into the distance as he continues to row the boat, you're barely putting in any effort.

"If you don't mind me asking, what happened? Whenever it seems to come in to conversation, everyone gets quiet and moves on." You ask, almost hesitantly.

Parts of you disliked that you allowed your curiosity to get the best of you. It wasn't your business, and a topic they had been evading conversation about since it happened. Though you cared about them, and want to take care of them.

"We were really struggling, the worst it had been. It was like everything that could go wrong, was going wrong. We had no food and we were freezing. There was a lot of pressure on all of us, and I guess Hoon just couldn't take it anymore. I had to jump in to pull him out of the water and I can still remember how hard he had sobbed in my arms."

"Oh Jake, I'm so sorry. None of you deserved that kind of life, you're all so loving and kind. I'm glad you all had each other, I can't imagine what you've been through." At some point, you had moved to turn your body around to face him. You had never been so close to his face before, yet it felt so familiar.

"Without Julia I'm not sure we'd still be here, so fucking up the system was our best choice. I guess I would never have met you either if I never went through with it- and I sure would have regretted that." He grins, and you can't help but return it.

"All of you are so strong, you're amazing, Jaeyun." You remind him, and hope this will be something he and his brothers will always know.

There are continuous shifts in the air whenever you are left together, as if every moment brings you so much closer, but formed a theory that there wasn't a moment where you hadn't known Jake Sim, like he was everlasting in your life.

It’s cut short when Riki comes running down from the cottage, almost tripping over his own feet. His face isn't entirely visible from the length away, but your stomach drops as you sense something is wrong. Just minutes ago, he was fast asleep.

As fast as possible, Jake rows himself back to the pier where Riki is stood, taking deep breaths. He appears bothered by something, and his concerned attention seems to be on you the whole time.

"You guys- you're going to end up in big trouble. Jesus, some guards just turned up at the door, pretty much just as you reached the pier. They didn't recognise you from so far away, we told them that you were going far out and couldn't come back, but they said they'll come back later to talk to you."

You are so, so scared; you can feel your body begin to shake as what you had been anticipating finally happens. It had been so long, that you had started to consider the idea that they swiftly moved on from you. Unfortunately, it could never be so easy.

It didn't take long for you to start sobbing, the original feeling of shock and fear subsiding into anxiety and sadness. Jay has you wrapped in his arms as you shake, everyone has seated themselves down apart from Jake, who aggressively wanders around the room.

"Jaeyun, stand still. You're just making her feel even worse shuffling around the room like that." Heeseung glares at his younger brother, standing up from his seat to walk towards him.

"Yeah? Well what else am I supposed to do? I don't know what the fuck to do!" Jake shouts, not so loud, yet it still makes you jump enough that Jay holds you ever so slightly tighter. Looking over, Jake and Heeseung are standing face to face.

"Stop shouting at me and get your goddamn act together, she needs us, she needs you. You want to help her? Then we need to talk and figure out where we go from here." Heeseung snarls at Jake, who lets out a frustrated groan and nods his head.

This was the first time you had seen them truly upset with each other. It's due to one of your own problems too, which makes you feel entirely responsible even if you hadn't intended to.

"I have to leave."

All of their eyes divert to your direction, even Jay draws back from you a little. They all share the same expression, one you can't quite read in detail, but they are shocked by your statement.

"What? No, no, where on earth would you go? We can figure this out. Don't go until you're ready to move on." Sunghoon states, his thick eyebrows beginning to furrow in concern.

"If I'm not gone by the time they get back, I'm not sure what they would do to you all if they knew I was here. I could never put you all at risky like that- and I would dread to think about the things they would do to me too."

"Are you sure?" Jungwon mumbles begrudgingly, frowning at the thought of you leaving them all. He had grown closest to you, other than Jake, and even though he would never admit it to anyone, he had grown rather attached to your presence.

Simply, you nod your head and hold your bottom lip between your teeth to attempt to avoid any more tears. Sunghoon was right to make a comment on you being ready, because you were far from so.

"I'll come with you." Jake's voice causes you to look at him again, eyes wide and lost. He appears so sure of himself, "I'll get you somewhere far enough that's safe. I can't stay with you, but I can offer as much help as possible. None of us want you out alone."

After a serious talk, heartbreaking goodbyes and reassurance that you will always have a place to be, you and Jake are on your way. He reminds you of another cottage not so long away that the two of you can stop at for the night, similarly to when you had first met.

Jake had been carrying a leather, worn-down rucksack that was filled with miscellaneous items that would keep you going and had been profusely refusing your offers to carry it for a little to give him a break.

There's a constant guilt riding through your body with every moment, and Jake is able to tell, he seems to know you well enough now. He spends his time telling you stories of his youth, his current years, his brothers; beautiful moments to tell you that this is momentary, and all will be well soon enough.

An hour or two walk leads you to the cottage, and it's far from pretty. In fact, you think some of the roof is missing and some of the windows are smashed up. Not the ideal place to stay, but it'll work for now.

"Here, take this, you're freezing." He offers up his jacket, more so forcing it into your hands. He's cold too, but he'd rather be the one to get sick.

"Why are there so many abandoned cottages around here? It's such a waste..." You question after sitting down at a wooden desk chair, your legs recovering from the long walk.

"People like to move around, they'll just up and leave, go to the next town or whatever it is they're doing. Their old homes just get forgotten about, I guess." He shrugs, he's used to them being around, while you were thinking about how lovely it would be to renovate.

It wasn't difficult for you to fall asleep, so exhausted that all it took was closing your eyes.

You never had nightmares; not until tonight.

Everyone you had come to know was there, complaining about how you were an awful friend, daughter, partner, princess. Hearing sharp words from your family was something you had become desensitised to, but Julia and Jake broke your heart.

Jake sees you shuffling in your sleep, making small noises, a concerned expression across your face. He pouts from where he sits, gathering that you were having a bad dream.

Quietly, he makes his way over to you and sits on the opposite side of the bed. He finds himself studying your sleepy face, you were always bright and ignoring a few minor occasions, he never really saw you upset.

He leans forward and pushes a strand of hair behind your ear, he ponders whether he should wake you up, but you're faster than him, shooting up as you frantically look around the room.

"Hey, woah! Breathe princess, you're okay, you're safe." Jake speaks so softly that the tension in your body dissipates immediately, your hand wraps around his for additional comfort and you look him in the eyes.

It feels right.

Jake's free hand moved upwards to rest on your cheek, you nuzzle into his hand happily and close your eyes. A few seconds pass, you decide to look back at Jake, who you hope is feeling just as you do.

When his thumb faintly rubs against your bottom lip, it was as if the subconscious block that had been holding you back snaps. Neither of you are sure who leaned in first, but it didn't matter.

His lips slot perfectly on yours; just like his hands, his arms, every fibre of his being. You feel slightly hesitant due to your lack in experience, though the softness of how Jake holds you tells you everything will be just fine.

He caresses your waist line as his tongue slips into your mouth, and you're sure you could kiss Jake's lips forever. In comparison, you’re gripping onto Jake for dear life, taking an awfully deep breath when you part from each other.

“I’m always going to keep you safe, you and the boys, you are my life. I’ll protect you even if it kills me.” He whispers against your lips, and a stray tear slips down your cheek as you both stay with each other, forgetting about your problems just for a moment.

You hadn't been to another town before since you were a small child, being isolated away from others for such a long time. It's so lively and full of happy people, it makes you think about how quiet it had been at your old home as everyone in town had generally kept to themselves.

"Anywhere you want to go?" Jake asks, his hand still gripping yours tightly. Neither of you decided to mention the previous night, but you both have refused to let go of each other since you fell asleep, and Jake was feeling nauseated at the thought of you getting lost.

You had to admit to being anxious; there was always the chance that someone would recognise you even if they hadn't seen you since you were much younger. Not everyone was a good person, you would end up back at square one.

"I think I'd like to go to the lake, the old lady in the bakery really sold it for me." You hold up the bag that was filled with bread and sweet treats (you had to convince Jake not to steal any of them because the lady was so kind and you had enough money), "It's getting a little late, so I wouldn't mind going to the lake for a little while and then going to the inn."

The sky is filled with vibrant variations of pinks, oranges and yellows as the sun begins to set. It shines beautifully onto the lake as you and Jake walk along the path, content as you both munch on bread and laugh with each other.

Time passes so fast that you don't even realise how long you have been wandering around for, the dark skies soon tiring you out. Your eyes feel heavy, so you suggest going to the inn.

"You are a lovely couple, how long have you been together?" The woman behind the counter asks, grinning at your closeness as she takes the money from Jake's hands.

"Our whole lives, miss." Jake says, as if it has been a normal everyday saying. Of course, you become embarrassed and hide behind Jake's arm and the elderly woman coos at you as she passes along the key.

The air feels strange once you and Jake are laid in the bed together. Even though you are so far apart from one another, it's like the heat of his body is still reflecting onto yours. Whatever you feel in your body, you know it is unfamiliar to you.

You bite your bottom lip in hesitance. Taking a deep breath, you turn around to face Jake. To your surprise, he had already been facing you with his eyes open, watching you.

"You can't sleep either?" He asks, his voice becoming raspy from the lack of speaking. Even though the room is so dark, he manages to look just as gorgeous as usual, even with such tired eyes.

"I'm thinking." You reply quietly, Jake nudges further so that he is closer to you.

"What are you thinking about?" He takes his hand, moving a stray hair behind your ear, hand now resting softly on your cheek.

When you don't answer, Jake's hand is quick to travel to the back of your head as he slams his own lips against yours. Your own hand makes its way into his hair, tugging lightly as your body shakes in anticipation when he lets out a low groan against you.

You clamber onto his lap, wanting to feel as close to him as was humanly possible. The emotions and hormones running through your body became so overwhelming that you could only let out whiny whimpers on his mouth.

His hand moves between your thighs, playing with your little clit in excitement, allowing you to grind against his veiny hand. He messes with you through your underwear, soon moving it to the side with a long groan. A long string of saliva links the two of you, Jake's jaw dropping as he looks at you.

"Didn't take you long to get so wet, you wanted me for that long, honey?" His voice drops octaves, his irises filled with a concept you could hardly comprehend; but you have never felt so much pleasure, "Can't believe I waited this long to see how pretty you look withering on top of me."

"Jake!" You grip at his arm, nails practically digging into his skin, hips moving faster and faster as you feel the intense butterflies in your stomach. Tears brim your eyes as you experience the new feeling, almost bursting as your slick covers Jake's hand.

He can barely take in the situation himself. He's hardly done anything and your eyes are already welling up and he just knows drool is going to start dripping from your swollen lips soon enough. Jake pulls his fingers out of you and licks them clean.

"Off, too hot. Yours too." You start to pull at Jake's shirt, he rips your nightgown from your body, leaving you with the thin material of your underwear. Before you could think, his arm wrapped around your back to pull you into him, taking your left breast into his mouth.

His other hand reaches to wrap perfectly around the other, harshly nipping to get a squeal out of you, he slots himself comfortably between your legs, pressing you against his hardening cock. The man underneath you bites his lip hard, lifting up his hips into your core.

"Fuck, fuck baby, just like that." His eyes and hands are still concentrated on your chest, completely hypnotised by their feel and appearance. Jake is absolutely enamoured, and you're already cock-drunk before he's even gotten inside of you.

But it still just isn't enough.

When you lift yourself up and reach down to palm his length through his pants, Jake is sure his eyes roll to the back of his head. He could feel

the fire emits from you, from inside you, from every touch you gifted to his body. You're so desperate, and he's ready to give you anything you desire.

"Can I..." You whimper out, reaching over to the low waistband of his pants. Looking at your face, Jake doesn't want to rip his eyes away. Your own eyes are blown out and your pretty skin is begin to sweat, your hair managing to fall flawlessly in place like you weren't jumping his bones.

"You can do anything you want to me, baby. I'm all yours." He whispers into your ear, nibbling slightly at the lobe. Swiftly, you finally pull at his pants and he lifts up so that you can remove them completely.

It stands tall, wet and red, you can't help but wrap your hands around it. However, not wanting to make a mistake, you give him your best doe eyes to ask for help.

"It's okay, princess. Just move your hand up and down, just like that- fuck." You move your hand up and down slowly, keeping eye contact with Jake, whose eyes are beginning to close from the building pleasure, "Such a good girl f’me.”

Suddenly, you're sliding yourself down his body, your face against his chest as your back arches deliciously. Your tongue lands directly on the slit of his tip, Jake moans loudly and grips onto your hair.

He tried his best not to buck his hips upwards, though he gets even more turned on at your inherent skill to take him in your mouth with ease, the tiny tears in your eyes only make him even more feral.

Your smaller hands are moving nicely on his cock along with your gummy mouth and just the sight of you has him on the edge; a lethal combination. Not wanting to let go just yet, he gently lifts you from him with a dazed smile at your sudden concerned face.

"It's okay, baby- you're doing so, so well for me. Just want us to be able to cum at the same time, hm?" He's quick to model you into the position he wants, you on your back facing him, legs over his shoulders so he can see your fucked out, cute face, “Tell me when you want me to move, okay?”

Then, he pushes himself into you.

You expected it to sting at first, your nails digging and scratching against Jake who just takes it. He waits, albeit the ache he feels in his stomach, until you give him the green light to start moving.

"Go, please." You squeak out, and he does as his lady requests. Still hurting ever so slightly, but with every move comes a larger wave of pleasure. He's almost sure he'll have to slap a hand over your mouth or kiss you so you don't get kicked out, "Oh my god!"

"So fucking tight. My pretty girl, all this for me." Jake stutters out against your neck, sucking at it while your hand rummage around his body, his hair, dragging your nails against his back as he ravages you.

Embarrassment fills you as Jake examines your face and body below him. You try to turn your head, but he immediately raises his hand to grab you by the chin and force you to look back, then his hand makes its way right around your throat in a light choke, "Look at me, honey."

It’s such an intimate moment, both of you finally together as one, only seeing each other and nothing else in the world. He’s holding your cheek while his other hand wraps around your throat and you’re all other the place.

You reach your peak, convulsing so hard and desperate. Jake’s eyebrows furrow harder, hips faltering as he climaxes too, you feel the spurts fill you to the brim, close to bringing another orgasm out of you.

Ears ringing, he lies on top of you though trying his best not to put all of his weight down on your current fragile body. He strokes the top of your head, and you ask him to stay inside of you until you fall asleep.

The alarm of the bright sun shining through the sheer white curtains has you waking up as soon as it hits your skin. You grab the sheets and hike them up your body, still naked after immediately passing out last night. However, it seems like Jake had cleaned you up before you awoke, no longer covered in sweat and cum.

Eyes closing again, you turn your body around and feel onto the other side of the bed for your lover, but only gripping onto empty sheets. You furrow your eyebrows and pout your lips, sitting up and looking around the room.

There is light sparkling from the gap under the bathroom door, you make the assumption he mist be in there, "Jaeyun? Are you in the bathroom?"

After a second or two, the door opens and there stands a half naked Jake, his lean torso and shoulders on full display for you. He grins as his eyes scan down your bare body, spending significantly more time on your tits.

"Now what a lovely sight this is first thing in the morning." He laughs, pressing soft kisses along the dark splotches on your neck. You roll your eyes with a smile, pushing him away a little so you could pick up your day clothing to get changed, "You could just stay like that for a few more hours, I'm not complaining."

"You're suddenly so perverted, have you been hiding this from me the whole time?" You ask jokingly, leaning against the doorway in all your naked glory. He looks at you like he has never seen anything as perfect, how he just can’t look away from you; the glint in them somehow tells you that it isn’t just lust in his eyes.

He doesn’t answer, shaking his head with a bite of his lip. Closing the bathroom door, you look at yourself in the mirror while you change, noticing the new glow in your skin — you’re sure there is a myriad of reasons why.

There’s a knock on the door to the room. strange, you think, but you imagine it may be someone complaining about the loud noises and squeaks throughout the night, so you finish putting your shirt on.

As your hand lands on the handle, Jake shouts.

“Get your fucking hands off me! She isn’t in here you, assholes! Who the fuck do you think you are?!” He’s angry at whoever was at the door, the mention of a she makes you shake and back away from the door.

You search for a window, anywhere that could get you out — but the thought of leaving Jake out there broke your heart and you would rather get hurt helping him than leaving all alone.

Before you can even come down to a decision between your two options, the bathroom door bursts open, wooden panels and metal flying around the room. You could recognise the clanky soldier attire of your family anywhere, them staring you down with violent glares.

Having nowhere to go, Jake nowhere in sight, your only option is to follow their instructions.

Standing before your parents, hands handcuffed behind your back, may have been the strangest occurrence you had the glory of experiencing in your life. Their angry faces dawned on you that you had royally fucked up and should have thought about being more sneaky instead of trying to live out your romance dreams.

"You are a disgrace to this family." Your mother spits at you, staring right into your eyes with pure disgust, no remorse for what she had done to you your whole life.

"I'm the disgrace? You tried to force your only daughter into a whole marriage with a man she couldn't stand to be around. You never cared about me, I'm only here to carry on your shitty legacy." You watch as your father's lips press into a thin line at your words, his hands rub at the bridge of his nose.

"You're completely delusional. The marriage will go on and that awful man you had stuck yourself to will be hanged for his crimes." His words are like poison venom, your knees bucking in shock.

Jake would be hanged because you had feelings for him, those were the crimes in your family's mind; their biggest fear as they locked you into a marriage destined to be because it was uncontaminated by a non-royal.

"What- no, no, no! Please, please let him go. I'll marry Beomgyu, I'll do anything, just please don't hurt him. He has a family, he did nothing wrong." You beg hard, almost wanting to drop to your knees with praying hands so they would listen to your requests just this singular time.

"We can't let a man of his kind go, they'll simply have to suffer." She dusts off her hands, standing up from her undeserved throne, "Don't think we forgot about how Julia betrayed us too."

"You're all fucking sick, you're sick in the head!" You scream at the top of your lungs, throat burning and your vision becoming unclear as you are dragged away back to your bedroom.

You spend your next few days with puffy eyes, overthinking every moment. It had been the day of your marriage, a day that you would remember forever but for the wrong reasons. Julia and Jake had still been alive since your torturous parents thought it would be a splendid idea for them to watch.

"You look gorgeous, I'm sorry that this day is not going as you desire, I wish this could be much different." Julia's mother had been the woman to adjust your dress. It was easy to see the sadness and distress in her eyes and you could barely imagine how she must be feeling in the moment.

"Thank you. I'm sorry about Julia." You wince as she tightens the corset.

"There isn't much I can do about that anymore. I tried my best, and it only seemed to make things worse." She comes around to your front, smiling so bittersweetly that it hurts you.

No matter how beautiful the reception is, it just appears revolting to you. Especially when you see Beomgyu waiting at the alter for you, everyone smiling at you like you should be happy and Jake and Julia sat right at the front, handcuffed up with guards on either side of them.

Your father holds on to your arm as you walk down the aisle and it makes you want to throw up on the expensive carpet. When you reach the front, you're practically pushed into Beomgyu's arms and the audience, since it's for show, laughs.

You look at Jake and Julia, them both sharing the same facial expression as you had. Seeing Jake in this light broke your heart and if you weren't in such an awful predicament, you would have ran to him.

"Any objections?" The priests asks before he begins and you have to peel your eyes away from Jake who looks like he hasn't slept in days and is on the verge of tears.

"I object!" Everyone's head turns in awe at the disturbance. You have to rub your eyes to make sure you're seeing things correctly because Riki is standing up on top of one of the further back pews, "I think this place has some decoration."

A sizzling sound is heard from the corner of the building; then the whole left side releases a large explosion that causes the building to begin to fall. With no thought, you start to run towards the exit, alerting Jake and Julia to join you, ripping your dress in the process.

Beomgyu latches onto your arm.

"Let go of me. They’re all I have left." You attempt to say sternly, but your voice trembles as you look between him and the exit. This was your last chance and he was trying to take it away from you. You’re struggling to drag yourself away from him- but he just releases you and turns to leave himself.

Jake, Julia and Riki, even Jay who seemed to have appeared out of nowhere, follow suit.

"What the fuck! Where the hell did you get explosives from you psychos!" Jake shouts with an energetic laugh, still running with his hands cuffed — you would have to figure out how to get him out of those once you were all safe.

"I don't know! Sunghoon said he knew some people!" Jay responds, chuckling back at his brother.

You're back at your real home in no time, but you know you'll have to do something about the corrupted royals at some point in time. They could have easily recognised Riki and come back for a less peaceful visit.

"How did you know what was happening?" Julia interrogates the boys, rubbing her wrists to relieve them of the pain from being locked in cuffs for so long.

"They have a weird habit of releasing all information to the public. Heeseung had a feeling that something was wrong and made a visit, luckily was the same day they announced you and had Jake hostage.” Sunoo shrugs, “Sunghoon came back with explosives and still won’t tell us where he got them from.”

"Well, what do we do now?" Jake asks, his arms still holding you protectively. Everyone stays silent, but you know you’ll figure it out together.

Years pass and they never bother you again and you would all laugh that Sunghoon’s mystery explosives must have really made them jump.

Most of the boys had moved on with their lives; Jake found Heeseung and Julia making out in the kitchen one day after a hidden relationship, then the two of them moved out into a new town a little while later to start a family. Jay and Sunghoon found well-paying jobs on travels and would come to visit every moment they could.

The three younger boys stayed back, while you and Jake built up the cottage where you revealed your love for one another to live your own lives.

You smile widely as you examine your growing belly with the new life growing inside of it, Jake watches you lovingly from his desk chair where he writes up his notes for work.

His baby, his pretty girl; you who once stood as royalty lived a simply happy life and Jake finding what he was looking for in the end.

I’d say that deserves a happily ever after.

taglist ; @slutforsjy @jaklvbub @whiskrv @mixtapejimin @zyvlxqht @saintriots @yohanabanana @jentlecoeur @belowbun @meujaeyun @capri-cuntz @greyminyoon1 @river-demon-slayer

Peerage: Series Masterlist

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader (modern royal AU)

Summary: Your royal life has just become all the more complicated by a new agreement that your father signed alongside the prime minister. The pressure is becoming unbearable, but an old friend of your older brother’s might turn out to be your saving grace.

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

princess!reader's friends decorate her door and give her cards like in legally blonde whenever you and rafe go out to dinner just in case he proposes this time, and you alwaysss wear a "perfect proposal dress" because you never know with him lol.

thoughts princess!reader getting upset and pouty when rafe pisses her offff. like how dare him!

she doesn't like getting too crazy upset so she channels that anger by journaling! like-

"dear diary, rafe is the worst boyfriend in the world, not only did he leave me on read this morning! he also forgot to order the bath salts i asked veeery nicely for three days ago!" all composed and calm on the outside, he leans over to see what your writing about.

"hey! what the fuck is this?" he huffs pointing at the paper

"my diary."

"i'm not the worst boyfriend in the world, i eventually texted you back." he leans back into the pillows and you roll your eyes.

"i saw that, don't start."

you turn back to glare at your boyfriend who's now pointing his finger at you, turning back the diary to very obviously write more stuff about him. but he'd never let you go to sleep mad at him so he finds a waaay to make it up....💞

I FEIN FOR A FULL FIC ABOUT PRINCESS!READER WRITTING IN HER DIRAY S'SO CUTE LIKE

yeesss OFC!! ignore any mistakes sorrriii ˚ ༘✶ ｡˚ ⁀➷ princess!reader w - mentions of sex, p in v, rafe making it up to you through sleepy sex!!

your nighttime self-care routine sometimes included needing to write in your diary the things you wouldn't dare say out loud. you sat on your side of the bed with the dim warm light illuminating the room while rafe took a shower. often doing all your skincare, shower stuff, and oral care before rafe so that after you can let it all marinate before sleeping. you grab your pink fluffy pen from your nightstand to start your journaling. 

dear diary, today was so totally not great, rafe ended up leaving me this morning to play golf with the boys even after he promised to take me to martino's to get some tea cakes that i've been craving for the past week!! AND on top of that, i missed a hair appointment since rafe had the car all day and he's like my boyfriend chauffeur!! this blows!! i hate him and he will not be given kisses or sex until further notice. 

rafe walks out of the bathroom, with a towel around his waist, his hair all wet, and droplets of water running down his muscles. the view almost makes you forget why you were pissed at him in the first place, but then you quickly snap out of it when you remember you are supposed to be "ranting" in your diary. 

"whatcha doin'?" rafe asks, making you look over at him, he's put on some comfy pajama pants and sat down on his side of the bed, leaning over to look at what you are writing. 

"i'm doing self-care, it's my de-stress diary." 

"why do you need a diary? that's what i'm here for, tell your secrets to me." he shrugs and leans closer to really read what's on the pages. 

"nuh uh, somethings i would say aren't lady-like." you bring the diary to your chest to prevent him from reading it. 

"hey, lemme see. i'm basically entitled to read your diary, it's a boyfriend's right."

"no baby that's just an invasion of privacy." you giggle which makes him huff.

"okay well we promised no secrets, so give it here." he reaches for the diary, you roll your eyes and give up, handing it to him. 

"fine, but i should not be held accountable for what i wrote, its girl stuff."

"aww shit baby, i forgot about martino's, i'm sorry," he remembers as he beings to read what you wrote. "no sex or kisses until further notice? that's fuckin' ridiculous kid." he furrows his eyebrows while he's reading. 

"mm-hmm, it's not like you'd notice anyways since you've been so "busy" recently." you exaggerate and roll your eyes.

"don't roll your eyes at me, fix your attitude." he points at you scoldingly which only makes you pout and reach for the diary again. 

"if you think you really need this then fine, but no more talking shit about me in there. use your words." he closes the little book and hands it back to you. 

"i did." 

"you know what i mean." 

"i can't say it to your face." you shake your head and place the diary on your nightstand. 

"yes, you can." he wraps his arms around you and pulls you closer to him, your back to his bare chest. 

"you smell really good." you sigh, wishing you could just give in and climb on top of him.

"thank you, baby. so do you." he kisses your bare shoulder, slipping down the thin strap of your silky nightgown. 

"but i'm still mad at you."

"rant to me then."

you sigh again, "you forgot that today was supposed to be our day, you suck and if you really loved me you wouldn't have done that." you exaggerate again. 

"i know princess, i know, and i'm sorry but i do love you so don't even start." your boyfriend chides, look back at him and he takes the opportunity to kiss the corner of your mouth. 

"no rafe, no kissing."

"don't be brat, i'll make it up to you. take you to martino's first thing tomorrow and i'll take you to do your hair, how'bout i fuck you to sleep nice n' slow right now? hmm?" he places his hand on the side of your face to bring you closer so he can press a kiss to your cheek. 

"mmhm ohkay, be gentle." you nod, rafe just grins and attacks you with soft kisses all over your lips, jaw and neck.

"just relax baby, lay down i'll do all the work." rafe extends his arm to reach over to your nightstand light to turn it off, now the only light coming in is the moonlight streaming in through the balcony windows. you lay back against the mattress, head hitting the pillows and rafe lifts the thin dress above your hips. never really wearing panties under your nightgown while you sleep, he rubs your bare pussy with the pads of two of his big fingers. rafe pulls himself out, also not wearing any boxers under the plaid pajama pants to sleep, and lines himself up to slowly push in, you wine and dig your nails into his biceps. 

"shshsh....you're fine." your boyfriend soothes as he begins to slowly and gently stretch you out, giving you a few wet kisses on your neck. the way he smells and feels on top of you makes you feel so warm and sleepy, that your eyes begin to fall closed as he thrusts into you very softly.

"i love you," you whisper, wrapping your arms around his neck to make you feel closer to him even though he's balls deep inside you right now. 

"i love you more princess, jus' fall asleep, i've got you."

Y'all best go read this, it's so GOOD (especially if you love Princess!Readers)

The writing is so beautiful 😭

(Part 1)

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: hints of anxiety, you're awkward af, & heavily self-insert/indulgent fanfic.

Kikongo translations: Mindele = white people

The rhythmic gallop of the horses would have lulled you to sleep if you weren't afraid of falling off. Keeping your left hand around your rider’s waist, you wiped the creeping fatigue from your eyes with the other.

‘Time to look alive.’ You thought, putting on your royal face before you would greet your cousin’s kingdom, Dahomey. Your new temporary home. 

You were the youngest of 6 princesses from the Kingdom of Kongo. Since your dear mother gave birth to all girls, the pressure to marry a man was heavy among you and your sisters, almost suffocating for you.

Suffocating to the point you made up some nonsense lie about wanting to study in Dahomey under your cousin Ghezo’s watch. 

Study for what exactly? Something about the inner workings of running a kingdom; conducting meetings, learning trade and economics, hosting celebrations, and whatever else you aimlessly rambled on about to your parents so they’d be convinced to send you away.

The outer Dahomey homes started to draw near as time slipped by while you were in thought. Your aching back groaned as you straightened up, fighting the winces that threatened to disrupt the grace you were trying to muster.

The citizens of Dahomey watched as you made your graceful, yet quiet entrance into their home. You didn’t go outside of your kingdom much, so you were torn on whether to meet their eyes and smile, or keep your gaze forward to the royal gates of your new home.

‘Am I coming off cold?’ The palms around the chauffeur’s torso started to become sweaty as your nerves were getting to you. 

‘Just give them a smile or something, my gods Y/N.’ You overthought. Turning your head and looking at no one in particular, a small smile tugged awkwardly at your lips.

‘Not like that!’ Heat rose to your cheeks as your own thoughts managed to embarrass you. You decided to keep your eyes locked on the gate until your traveling group reached it.

The guards slowly swung the gates open and you were greeted with the clanging sounds of swords and grunts. Your eyes marveled at the scene in front of you.

It was the Agojie. The whole continent of Africa had heard of this fierce army of women. 

There were mixed opinions, of course. 

Most of the elders believed women had no business wielding a sword. Children thought they were the coolest people alive and wanted to grow up to be as brave as them. The men scoffed whilst being secretly intimidated. The women listened with admiration, but never outwardly expressed it to avoid upsetting their husbands or future prospects.

However, you never hid your awe of the warriors whenever they were brought up in conversation. You were a child of very few words growing up, but when there was something you were passionate about, you couldn’t fight the desire to gush about it to whoever was willing to listen. The passion would bubble in your abdomen like hot hibiscus tea, and threaten to spill messily over the sides of the pot if you didn’t say what you desperately needed to say.

Your gaze bounced around the compound as you tried to take in as much as you possibly could. 

“Holy shit, the stories don’t do them any justice.” You mumbled to yourself, not noticing the way your chauffeur shortly glanced back in shock at your sudden profanity.

A tall Agojie soldier stepped forward as your chauffeur pulled the horse to a halt. The sounds of metal clashing faded and the warriors' attention on their sparring partners now shifted to you, Dahomey's royal guest. 

'Holy shit, now they're looking at me.' Ignoring the anxious heart that started to knock against your chest, you let your rider ease you off the stallion. The woman bowed to you as your feet touched the compact, brown sand.

"Welcome to Dahomey, Princess Y/N. My name is Amenza and I will be escorting you to King Ghezo today." She greeted. You slightly cleared your throat before replying.

"Lovely to meet you, Amenza, and thank you." You greeted back in Fon. Amenza prompted you to follow her back to where your cousin was and you followed, trying your best to ignore the curious eyes on your mahogany skin. 

A certain set of eyes was hard to ignore though. Your gaze felt pulled to your right as you trailed behind Amenza. An Agojie who seemed a few inches taller than you from where she stood had the same curious glint in her eyes that the others held. And a bit of something else as well, but it was hard for you to pinpoint what exactly.

"Princess?" Amenza's voice broke their stare and you turned to her with raised eyebrows.

"Sorry, what was that?" 

"I asked if you had a good journey on the way here, your Highness." Amenza repeated, smiling in amusement at your habit to be in your own world.

"Oh, yes." You glanced back at the woman you locked eyes with, and she was indeed still looking at you. "Just a bit fatigued, is all."

You retired to your new room after you caught up with cousin Ghezo and got acquainted with his wives. Thankfully, he decided to give you your own room so that his wives wouldn't "keep you up with their gossiping"; which was a relief to you since that was one of your biggest pet peeves. 

Your studies would start in a few days, so you had some time to rest. What would you do in those few days? You had no clue. The absence of all your sisters' different personalities left you absentmindedly trudging about your room not knowing what to do with yourself. 

Eventually, you decided to go outside into the corridor of the palace and wander. You weaved past some of the king's frolicking children and nodded at some of his conversing wives that hung around in the hallway. Your feet eventually took you to a snug sector of the palace that had windows that faced directly towards the Agojie compound.

You let your curiosity guide you to a window's edge, and you sat like you were an audience member at a performance. 

If the gods allowed you, you would watch them for days. Your sisters would often make tongue-in-cheek remarks about your unusual interest in the Agojie. 

"Wow, she gushes more about the Agojie than any of her suitors! Maybe you should marry one of them instead, hahaha!" They teased one time. That joke alone sent you into a stuttering mess as you tried to defend herself. It didn't work though, it just turned into an inside joke after that. 

Too lost in thought fondly remembering your sisters with your gaze upon the Agojie trainees, you failed to notice someone stepping up behind you.

"Hello, Your Highness." The voice made the hairs on your dark skin stand at attention as you jumped, placing a hand on your thumping heart to prevent it from bursting from your chest. There the woman stood before you, with her palms relaxed over her machete's hilt. 

"Oh shit! I mean- sorry, you scared me!" You exclaimed, wincing at your own profanity. 'My first day here and I'm already not acting princess-like.'

"My apologies, Princess Y/N, I didn't mean to startle you." At first glance she did look apologetic, but one could tell that she was fighting back a smirk. "I saw you looking by the window and was wondering if you were in need of any assistance. My name is Izogie."

'Izogie. That's such a pretty name.'

"Uh, thank you, Princess." Your head tilted in confusion before it dawned on you that you said that out loud. Your cheeks burned and you thanked the gods that you were blessed with dark skin. Because if you were one of those mindele that came to Kongo from time to time, you'd be as red as a yam.

"Oh uh, yeah no, I was just... looking. I don't need anything, thank you for asking." It was strange how nervous you was getting in front of Izogie. You couldn't give yourself an answer. Maybe it's because of your massive admiration for soldiers like her. Maybe it was the confidence that was radiating off of her that you wanted to emulate.

Or maybe the way your heart skipped a beat every time you locked eyes.

"What exactly are you looking at if you don't mind me asking?" Izogie stopped fighting back the smile she held back as she prodded. Your hand, ordained with Kongo's finest jewelry, began to fiddle with your necklace as you tried to pick a scrambled thought that wouldn't make you as awkward as you felt at this moment.

"Well... it's not necessarily what, it's more who..." You trailed off, shooting a quick glance at the trainees. Izogie remained silent and answered with an eyebrow raise, waiting for you to continue.

"I was just watching the trainees. I've heard plenty of stories of you ladies down south growing up." You explained. The warrior asked if she may sit and you readily permitted.

"What do the Kongolese think of us?" She asked as she set her weapon aside so she could sit better, facing you.

"There's mixed opinions, to be honest." You looked off to the side to think, partially for fear that Izogie's undivided attention on you would cause you to stumble on your words. "Some admire, some don't understand, and others don't favor the Agojie much."

"And you?" The pointed question made your eyes widen for a split second. 

'This fierce warrior wants to know what I think?'

"Me? Oh well, I think that... you women are fascinating." You shyly responded, taking more interest in your necklace than the woman in front of you. The compliment made Izogie unconsciously smile wider.

"Why thank you for thinking of us highly. It's an honor." She slightly bowed with a hand across her chest. You weren't sure of how to respond, but before you could, Izogie stood back up.

"If you need anything, don't hesitate to let me or anyone else know. Welcome to Dahomey, Princess Y/N." And with one last bow, you watched as she turned and walked back out through where she came. Not without admiring her muscular back as she walked away.

'Wait, did I just...? Seriously, what's going on with me?' You criticized yourself, blinking rapidly as if it would delete the mental image you took of Izogie's backside. It wouldn't.

A reflective beam of light flashed in your eyes offensively as the sun peaked out from the clouds above. With squinted eyes, you peered down next to you to see the machete that she left behind. 

Your delicate hand grasped the sturdy hilt. The weight of the weapon surprised you, but you quickly adjusted by sliding it towards you to your lap instead. The long curved blade was sharp and sleek, yet there were faint scar-like marks of varying sizes decorated across it. They made you wonder how it got each one, and if Izogie has similar scars on her body.

"Stand up! Are you just waiting to die!?" The shouts of the weapon's owner reminded you that she might need this at some point and you had to return it.

But that little mischievous devil on your shoulder was suggesting to keep it for tonight. 

'It's only one night. It's not like Izogie doesn't have other weapons. Plus, I can probably practice a few swings before I go to bed, then I'll return it first thing in the morning.' You bit her lip, torn between doing the right thing now or later.

'Later.'

"Ah fuck it, I'll give it to her tomorrow." Your itch for mischief was satisfied as you retired back to your room for the rest of the day, only coming out for dinner. 

Throughout the night, you sliced through the air with clumsy strikes in your candle lit bedroom. 

And Izogie softly chuckled to herself in her own bed, wondering when the cute royal guest would return her machete.