Reminding Everyone That This Exists- - Tumblr Posts

Starters Based on Phrases my GF taught me

You ran backwards to the forest of dicks with your mouth wide open, your trousers pulled down.

Circulates like storkshit in the air

Stands like the priest's dick at the wedding

Wobbles, like the horse dick in the judge's ass

Life's not a creampie.

Work isn't a dick, it can stand for several days.

The horsecock has an end too

He's beating the nettle with someone else's dick.

You pulled a dick even from a sack of cunts.

My dick is out!

It's as easy as shitting in the bed

Yeah and the big horsedick!

Spring is here, dicks are getting swollen.

He shat into his own nest

Do you want me to marry you on top of that?

Honorable mentions to @infernal-general