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Insomnia || l.sm

MASTERLIST

Pairing: dk x gn!reader

Summary: sleepless nights are no match for dk!

Warnings: none

Word Count: 954

a/n: when they say self insert i mean i inserted myself… wrote this at 3:45 am last night bc i was having insomnia…

“Baby,” you heard a low grumble from beside you as you tossed and turned for what felt like the millionth time that night. “Go to sleep”

“Go to sleep?” you mumbled under your breath sarcastically, annoyed at the remark but not wanting to fully wake up the peaceful figure who lay beside you. “Why didn’t I think of that hours ago?”

You were cranky, for sure. After all, you were feeling tired — your eyelids heavy and every so often slipping into hazy visions that blurred the lines between sleep and consciousness. But for some reason, you just could not sleep. Just before the peaceful calm of sleep could fully wash over you, it was as if an alarm rang, alerting you back to the real world and you’d turn the other way, hoping that it would help but to no avail.

With a huff you turned away, envious of the soft snores that escaped your boyfriend’s lips. Although this wasn’t a normal occurrence, it happened enough that you knew how your insomniac episodes could affect your mental health. Too many hours of just staring at the shadowed walls in your room never led to anything better than insecure thoughts creeping into your brain.

Knowing that those thoughts would make their way to you soon, you reached behind you in search for an anchor to some semblance of peace and found your boyfriend’s hand, intertwining your fingers with his. Even in his sleep, his fingers reacted automatically, spreading and making room for your hand to fit in his. A soft sigh of relief escaped your lips.

Now feeling less annoyed, you turned back to face him and a small smile found its way onto your features as you admired him. You slipped your hand out of his slowly, opting instead to trace the lines of his face, not wanting to touch him in fear of waking him. “Good night, Seokmin,” you whispered.

At the sound of his name, however, you watched his eyelids flutter half open, enough to see you with your hand nearing his cheek and a dopey smile on your face, which he mirrored almost instantly.

“Can’t sleep?” he asked in a much gentler, albeit hoarse grumble than earlier. Now it was his turn to reach for you, his fingers pushing a strand of hair back, now hassled from hours of movement. Your own eyes fluttered shut at the contact, feeling comforted by the touch. You shook your head no as his hand came to land on your cheek, his thumb rubbing softly against the skin.

Seokmin let out a sad sigh, knowing how miserable you feel after having an episode and he wishes he could have been awake earlier to help. But he knew you hated to wake him, believing that his sleep was too precious to lose in the hectic life of an idol. He appreciated the thought, but he always slept better when you were also sleeping peacefully beside him.

Glad that he’s at least awake now, he wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling you right into his chest. You nuzzled into the crook of his neck, taking in a deep breath, the comforting scent of your laundry detergent and remnants of his cologne filling your senses. He had one hand stroking the back of your head, and the other on your lower back, slipping up inside your shirt to rub gentle circles on your skin, knowing it helped you sleep.

“Like they do with babies,” you had told him once when this happened earlier in your relationship. “My mom used to do that for me when I couldn’t sleep.” He took the advice to heart, and now the actions came naturally to him.

“I know you didn’t wanna wake me,” he began softly as you felt his chest move with his voice. “But you know you always can. It’s never a bother to be able to hold you close like this.” The slight airy chuckle that rumbled through him was a signal that he could feel you smile against his chest.

“You know,” he continued. “The first time you ever asked me to hold you like this because you said you had insomnia sometimes, I thought you were coming up with an excuse to get me to stay the night.” He laughed again, tightening his arms around you and pressing a kiss on the crown of your head before continuing. “But I was still so nervous. I remember my hands shaking, and I was hoping to God, Buddha, anyone, that you couldn’t tell. So I rubbed circles on your back, hoping to hide it, and when you said that’s what your mom did to help you, I felt so much relief.”

He let out a soft yawn, before continuing. “I never actually fell asleep that night. I just kept rubbing your back, worrying about how you would get enough sleep, so I just kept going because I couldn’t tell if you were asleep.”

By now, Seokmin knew the signs that you were slowly making your way into a true sleep. He could feel your eyelids falling shut against his skin, even as you instinctively tried to fight them open, and he felt your breathing begin to slow as the hand you had clinging to his side began to loosen its grip. He smiled softly, leaving a final message before you fully fell asleep.

“I love you,” he said, nuzzling his cheek against you. “And I’m glad you love me. Dream of me, because I know I’ll dream of you.”

The last thing you’ll hear before finally dozing off is Seokmin’s quiet humming, a lullaby that you’ve heard him sing before lulling you into a sweet dream.

taglist: @yksthings @coveyland @xuimhao