Svt Dk X Reader - Tumblr Posts

Screaming crying omg this was too good y'all 😣

I ❤️ DILFS / GOOD GIRL (18+)

pairing: student!brother's bff!seokmin x student!good girl!reader

genre: college au, brother's best friend au, smut (MDNI), bit of crack, a small bit of angst but not nearly as much as most of my fics

description: when you head out for college, you incidentally end up at the one your bother's best friend has disappeared to 2 years prior. now, seokmin has promised your brother, vernon, to teach you and take care of you while you're away from home. unfortunately, it seems vernon should have been a bit more specific about what exactly seokmin was supposed to be teaching you.

warnings: vernon is ur overprotective brother, seokmin is not a dilf unfortunately, dirty talk, masturbation (male and female), fingering, slight restraint?, praise (f. receiving), pet names (good girl is so overused), teaching, innocence kink, corruption kink, oral (m. receiving), tiddie play, alcohol consumption, a bit of pining, shame on the readers part, she feels a bit like a slut for a moment, kinda brief mention of miscarriage? for like a metaphor lol, jeonghan is hot in this, giselle is ur bff and i almost gave up my mission and made this whole fic ab her shes so hot, ok i think thats it

quotes my creative director (@joshibambi): "just admit u wanna bang son", "o is for orgasm", "the urge to be the younger sibling for once"

wordcount: 15.9k

a/n: the way this fic took me years to write. i hav been busy :( thank u 2 every1 who liked girl code uve made my whole year :D hope u like this one 2!!

You preferred to remember Seokmin for how he was.

How he was small and young, how he had a swanky bowlcut and how he looked in his school uniform. How he and your big brother, Vernon, had bonded and watched movies together in your living room, and the countless dinners he’d stayed over for, always so respectful to your parents and you. He wasn’t your best friend, he was Vernon’s, and yet he made it so easy to feel comfortable, so easy to feel like you were the one he came over for. 

You crushed on him back then, wrote countless diary entries about him and his stupid, beautiful smile. But it had been so forbidden, you remembered feeling that, because of how Vernon had groaned at you to leave every time you peaked your head through the living room door, masking your insistent eyes on Seokmin with simply wanting to “watch a grown up movie”. Sighing, you’d turn back to your princess pink room, and the boundary - the Vernon shaped boundary - that stood between you and Seokmin grew farther.

It had almost been a relief when Seokmin left for college. That was the most terrible thing, the relief you felt while your brother was grieving the sudden separation with his best friend. But your heart simply couldn’t help but let out a long sigh - years of yearning for him when he was so close by. You felt that cool wash of repose when that border between you and him had disappeared from your view. Years of watching it, wondering whether to pad closer or turn away from it, became a distant memory. For two years you were almost a normal girl and a good baby sister. 

Then it was your turn to head off for college. The nearest, big college to you accepted your application and you still distinctly remember dinner with your parents and your brother, how’d they’d cheered and clinked glasses and looked at you adoringly, because you were growing up right before their eyes. Then under the faint light of the restaurant chandelier, your mom had said something that immediately sent you hurdling back to that old, distant boundary: “Maybe you’ll see Seokmin there!” 

How had you forgotten? You supposed in that time you’d let yourself be more taken with the relief. It was the thought that he would be gone that had distracted you from exactly where to. And there you were with all your moving plans and your packed backs, and your glass raised and frozen in the air and your eyes wide. 

Then came the reasoning: surely, you could avoid him? It was a big college, there were plenty of people. There was no logical reason you’d really have to see him. Except for Vernon, of course. Ever so oblivious, your brother had called up Seokmin to tell him the good news, and to tell him to take care of you and protect you. And Seokmin was so sweet, of course, he’d take care of his best friend’s baby sister. 

And there you were at college. All grown up.

In your defense, you had avoided him skillfully. You’d turned down his request to help you with unpacking, turned down his tour of the school (that you’d actually desperately needed - why is room 240 not with all the other 40’s?!), and most of all, you’d turned down every single message inviting you to a party. 

I guess to him that was a perk; partying with the older kids. He knew you after all. He knew that you were a quiet girl and you stayed within your neatly laid brick walls, and he knew you were shy, and he knew you needed help letting loose. He knew you were a good girl. 

Which is why it wasn’t surprising at all that you turned down his offers - wanting to stay focused on school. At least, that’s what you told him. Truth was even being in his vicinity had put you much closer to that boundary you’d never dared cross. You were afraid even just seeing him would send you hurdling back, like a leaf in the wind. So you didn’t go. 

For a while, at least. 

“This is, like, a once in a lifetime opportunity!” Giselle whined and you shook your head adamantly. “Absolutely not.” 

“Well, maybe not for you, but for me!” she argued. “I can’t believe you’re consistently being invited to parties with hot, sexy men, and you’re turning it down because of one guy!” 

You were currently sitting in the library with your roommate, Giselle, and you’d made the unfortunate mistake of telling her about your predicament after receiving yet another invitation to a party tomorrow. Giselle was throwing a temper tantrum because she had never ever had anything as ridiculous. 

You liked Giselle a lot. She was very different from you - she was hot. You weren’t - you were cute. Giselle held boys on leashes and made them do homework for her. She liked partying and sexy, black dresses. You were a fucking nerd, and cute was the highest compliment you had ever received for your looks. Even though you were different, Giselle had immediately taken a liking to you. You had initially feared she would think you were lame, but she was so nice - except for right now.

“Come on, Y/n, there are, like, no cute guys in our year!” she said pleadingly, clasping her hands together and pouting, but you shook your head.

“You don’t understand, Giselle,” you murmured solemnly, trying to regain your focus on the science textbook in front of you. 

“I understand perfectly well,” she said and you eyed her suspiciously. “I understand that you’re a bitch!” 

“Alright, that’s unnecessary,” you said, closing your book. You pinched the bridge of your nose, when she went on. “No, honestly, Y/n. You’re a virgin, right?” 

You snapped your head towards her in shock. Your eyes darted around frantically, before you leaned over the table to whisper to her: “How do you know that?” 

“Don’t embarrass yourself, honey,” she grinned, holding back laughter and you rolled your eyes, sighing. “And what about it, Giselle?” 

“How are you ever gonna get yourself out there if you’re constantly caught up on this guy and trying to keep away your feelings for him? You’ll stay a virgin forever, girl. You need to look him in the eyes and realize you’re above that childish crush!” 

You stayed quiet, slumped in on yourself with your book in your lap. Why was she making sense? 

You’d never thought about it that way. That your infatuation with your brother’s best friend was somehow holding you back from exploring and evolving as a woman. That maybe having him in the back of your mind every time you’d shyly made out with guys in high school, had been the thing that stopped you in your tracks. 

“I can see it on your face, you know I’m right,” Giselle smiled smugly from behind the screen of her laptop. “Unless you’re asexual. In that case, fierce, but if you’re not, like, get out there, queen. Sometimes you need to realize that you have to leave one dick for another dick because the other dick is so good.” 

You furrowed your brows. “Is.. Is this still about me?” 

“No,” Giselle shook her head.

“Okay, yeah, ‘cause- ‘cause that didn’t..”

“Yeah, I know. I was more so, uh, angling-”

“Right-”

“Angling the story to- to my current situation.”

“I get it, yep.” 

There was a moment of silence. You pursed your lips and looked at the message on your phone. Then you started typing.

“Are you telling him you’re coming with your super sexy, hot friend?” 

“Yes.” 

“Y/N, I LOVE YOU.” _____________________________

Regret was a nasty, old demon on your back and it had twisted and tugged at your guts, while you let Giselle get you party-ready. You’d sat on her bed, in her dress, and having her put her makeup on you, you’d sulked and tried to shrug off your back.

“You look so hot when you actually try,” she’d giggled, using a fluffy brush to spread the bake underneath your eyes.

“Thanks,” you’d mumbled, and she’d paused her movements, frowning.

“What’s wrong?” she’d asked, sitting back on her knees. You had sighed, reaching a hand up to run it through your hair, but pausing midway when you realized you would ruin the styling Giselle had worked so hard on. You lowered your hand again.

“I’m not sure about this,” you’d murmured and she frowned genuinely. “Y/n, I meant what I said. I know I talk a lot about boys and stuff, but you really shouldn’t let yourself be held back by him!” 

Before you could speak again, Giselle had tugged you off the floor to stand in front of her mirror. 

“Look at you,” she’d cooed, clapping your shoulders. “You look so pretty!” 

You’d smiled a little shyly, looking at your form in the mirror abashedly. You were pretty. Not cute, not nerdy; pretty. Curves hugged tight by a sleek, black dress from Giselle’s closet, this was a version of you that could actually see having sex - seducing men, gaining from her looks.

“I guess you’re right,” you’d said sheepishly, and Giselle had smiled sincerely and you’d let her take you to the party down the streets in a nearby frat house, and you’d almost not wavered when you stood right in front of it, music blasting out of every crevice. 

But then you were inside and he was right there. For the first time in two years, he was there, and he was so hot. He was wearing a white tee and a fucking silver chain, and, God, when did he start working out, because his arms were so big and so toned. And his hair was fluffy and dark brown, and his face was slim, and the tops of his cheekbones were shining under the kitchen lamp, where he was talking to some other guy, arm flexed, as he leaned against it on the counter. 

If there was one thing about Seokmin that had stayed the same it was that smile. He wore it now, laughing, as he talked to some blonde guy about something, and you wanted to scream because, there it was. The boundary, the ledge, the line, whatever, it was right before you again, right there with him. And all the feelings that came with it, your heart, wet and red in your throat, a brew of anxiety in your stomach. 

Without sparing even a second, you’d clasped onto Giselle’s wrist, tugging her into a herd of anonymous people, and just walking. Walking, walking, pulling her along (she countered only with a “hey!”) only for you to hit a wall or something, just as long as you were far, far away from him. 

“What the hell?” she said, when you finally stopped walking because you’d entered the living room, which was apparently more exclusive, as only a few people populated it, including a couple that was making out on the far end of the couch. 

“He was there,” you gasped dramatically, as if you’d seen a ghost. “I-I can’t do this, Giselle.” 

“Relax, babe, it’ll be fine. You’re away from him now, aren’t you?” Although she was trying to be supportive, you could tell she was growing a little tired of your theatrics. You couldn’t care less though, you were panting, and peering over her shoulder to see if he was somehow coming towards; and, God forbid, smile at you with that angel grin. 

Giselle followed your gaze and sighed, brows furrowing. “How about I get us some drinks? Then you can let loose a little.” 

You nodded absently, following her lead when she pulled you to sit down on the couch. You clambered to the couch rest, when she walked away, swaying her hips to the music. 

You might’ve looked different, but you were still you. The entire scene had you uncomfortable, and you were still the shy, unconfident and nerdy girl. You cursed yourself for letting Giselle’s reassurances fool you - you would never be this type of person, and you would surely never get over Seokmin. She’d been wrong about everything. 

“You okay, darling?” 

You jumped at the voice, eyes darting up to see who it was. 

You didn’t know him. He was handsome, though, but you’re not even sure you’d call it that. He was pretty, and he had long, black hair and big eyes and he was giving you this teasing smile, that was doing nothing to ease your nerves.

“I’m good,” you squeaked, gaze moving to a nearby pair of shoes in the corner of the room. You heard him chuckle, before he dropped into a squat before you. One lean hand came up to your knee, giving it a squeeze. “You just look so nervous, pretty,” he sat down an anonymous cup of liquor. “I don’t think I know you. Can you tell me your name?” 

The hand on your knee burned into you, thumb brushing back and forth over the skin and he was looking at you so intently, it had you sputtering. “Uhm, uh, Y/n.” 

His thumb froze. You looked over at him curiously to find this dumbfounded expression on his face, devious grin spreading on his pretty features. He chuckled and cleared his throat, face dropping down before he moved it back to look at you again. 

“You’re the girl Seokmin’s always inviting over here?” 

You nodded shyly and he smiled at you. “I’m Jeonghan.” 

“Hi.”

A pause. Jeonghan squeezed your thigh, watching in delight at the way you screwed your eyes shut. 

“You know, I just didn’t expect you to look like this,” he said finally and, sensing your confusion, he teasingly added: “The girl who’s always turning down parties to study.” 

You blush deepened, cheeks furiously rosy, as you fiddled with your fingers in your lap. “I borrowed my friend's clothes,” you breathed, pursing your lips. “Ah!” Jeonghan gently patted the top of your thigh, nodding along exaggeratedly, “You borrowed your friend’s clothes! I see!” 

He studied you while you giggled at his antics, still refusing to look him in the eye, really. He was almost suffocating, his hand on your thigh and his eyes boring into your face, and his cologne in a constant stream in and out of your nostrils. But suffocation, you decided, was almost better than being around Seokmin and having him parade his kind heart and his thick arms and his sweet smile, and just how off-limits he was. 

Ripping you from your thoughts, Jeonghan stood up, placing both hands on the tops of your thighs and bending down to your face, so his nose was buried in your cheek.

“Look at me, darling,” he whispered, then pulled his face away from yours, just enough so you could gaze into his brown eyes. His hands were much higher now, squeezing hard at the plush of your thighs, dangerously close to your center and only separated by the thin fabric of Giselle’s dress. 

“There she is,” Jeonghan smiled, voice a whisper. His lashes came over his eyes, when they flitted down to your lips. “Don’t you wanna come with me upstairs, and I can make you feel really, really goo-”

“JEONGHAN! GET OFF OF HER, THAT IS MY BEST FRIEND’S BABY SISTER!”

There’s a voice you know.

From across the room, Seokmin had burst through the mass of people, now power-posing with an extended finger in the direction of where Jeonghan was tilting over you, rubbing your thighs, as you sat innocently before him. 

Jeonghan stood up, taking all of his heat and his suffocation and cologne with him, groaning and throwing his head back. “Seokmin!” he whined and he was suddenly no longer so suave and seductive. 

“No, I won’t hear it, Jeonghan,” Seokmin said and, as much as you knew Seokmin to be sweet and tender and lovely, there was this crystal-clear anger in his voice. He walked over, one large hand pushing at Jeonghan. “Go get any other girl and sleep with her, just not her. Get your sorry ass out of here.” 

Apparently Jeonghan sensed the same thing you did - a rare anger in Seokmin - because he didn’t put up much of a fight at all, only smiled at you apologetically (and then, when he was behind Seokmin, gave you a small, devious wink - he just couldn’t help himself). 

You couldn’t focus much on Jeonghan at all though. Because Seokmin was standing in front of you, all muscle and huge fucking thighs by your head, and when you dared to tilt your gaze up to him, you saw how all that anger simply melted away. 

“Hey,” he breathed, smiling softly.

“Hey.” 

Then his eyes darkened, if only for a moment, as they traveled over your figure, gift-wrapped in that tight, black dress. His jaw clenched and he looked around for a moment. When he looked at you once more, he was giving you that smile - the one you’d fallen in love with - and the chocolate in his eyes was melting.

“Come on,” he ushered gently, one hand carefully guiding you off the couch. “Let’s go to my room where there aren’t any scary, evil, mean men.” 

Despite being so on edge, so jittery, as you followed him up some distant staircase, you couldn’t help but laugh at those words. He was talking exactly like he had when you were kids. That was how you preferred to remember him; all small and young and with a swanky bowl cut, and he’s the exact same way with you, hand warm in yours, as he guides you through the house. 

“Why’re you laughing?” he smiled, and you suppressed your own, trying not to dwell too much on how fast your heart was beating. “It’s just like before,” you quipped and Seokmin’s hand squeezed yours in understanding. 

He lumbered down the hallway and at its very end, preceded by rows of white oak doors, he opened his own with a twist and a turn of the brass-blend knob. When he closed it, the party became muffled around you, as if his room was filled with water, and now the rest of the world was a garbled mess, and you were drowning.

His room was clean. You supposed Seokmin had never been the messy type - not even when infected by the influence of Vernon. He had a half-open closet, where you spotted folded clothes, and a circle rug and purple and green lava-lamp plugged in on his nightstand. 

Seokmin apparently did not think it was clean enough, because he swooped down gallantly to grab a tossed sweater, smiling at you sheepishly when he held in between his fingers. You stared at him.

You felt like a kid again. Felt like just a young girl, creeping through the crack in the living room door, and looking at his silhouette, outlined by some grotesque horror movie playing on the TV. His sharp nose, when he turned to Vernon and laughed, his hair, all poofed and tousled and scruffy, and his smile. 

And you’d let yourself fall into this trap, maybe to some extent you’d even wanted it. Because now he was right in front of you, and so was that damned barrier, right by your outstretched fingertips, and you could almost envision yourself climbing over it - climbing into his lap and-

“I didn’t think you’d ever come,” Seokmin said gently, a permanent, small smile frozen on his lips. You coughed, unready. “Uh, yeah, my friend- my friend thought I should try and.. You know, get myself out there.” 

Seokmin studied you, bemused and fond, fiddling with the baby blue sweater in his hands. You were looking back cautiously, as if assessing a threat, but the threat was the sweetest, kindest boy in the whole wide world. 

“Yeah, well,” he cleared his throat suddenly, ripping his gaze from you to fold the sweater onto his desk chair. “I’m sorry about Jeonghan, he’s.. You shouldn’t, uh..” Now neatly folded, you saw him rubbing the sweater between his fingers. “You should stay away from him.” 

“Why?” you asked, and it was genuine enough that Seokmin let out a sigh. 

“You’re too much of a good girl to be with him. He’s no good.”

A whimper clawed its way up your throat, bubbled from the depths of your belly, but you tamed it and settled on a light hum. You felt your underwear becoming a little sticky, and you wanted to die, because God, this was your brother’s best friend. They still facetimed every Tuesday and still played Fortnite together over Discord every Saturday. 

“College going good?” Seokmin asked, retreating from the sweater to sit down on his bed. He looked up at you brightly and patted the spot next to him. It felt like another trap, where the folds in the blanket curved down under his weight, and would eventually lead you into him. You sat down hesitantly. 

“It’s okay,” you breathed, folding your hands and in your lap and tensing your shoulders. Seokmin, fully relaxed and slumped, noted your posture and slid his hand over the exposed skin of your back. “Hey,” he whispered, so intimate it hurt your heart, “hey, hey, relax, Y/n. It’s just me.” 

His eyes were soft and full of concern when he spoke quietly again, his voice almost a backdrop to the muffled sounds of dancing college students: “You know, Vernon was really concerned about how you would do away from home.” 

“I’m not doing bad!” you said quickly, dismissing it immediately. Seokmin stared at you. “I just- this isn’t really my scene.” 

His hand felt searing hot on your back, where it slid up and down, almost coaxing you further into him. He hummed. “Yeah, I didn’t think so.” 

Then: “I’m sorry if I made you feel like you had to come. Just figured you might want that street cred of being friends with the upperclassmen.”

You snorted and, cheeks rosy as ever, started giggling, eyes still cemented to the floor. Your hair was falling gently over your face, wisps of baby hair tickling your forehead. 

“It’s okay,” you sighed away the laughter, “You were just trying to get me out of my shell. I appreciate it.” 

Seokmin smiled at that. His hand dropped from your back and you both stared into the expanse of his room. A small window to let in the rain, the moonlight separated by the grid, and the curtain blowing in a solemn breeze. You and Seokmin sat, both very small suddenly, like kids, on the edge of the bed and became speckled in starlight, in diamond-dust. 

Then Seokmin was doing it. He was letting you be comfortable, letting you slip into a dazed joy, intoxicated from his presence. He was asking about your teachers, exams, friends, experiences, and you were both laughing together, and once again you were forgetting that Seokmin was your brother’s best friend, and he was not with you for you, but he was simply talking to you out of courtesy to your brother. He let you forget.

“You going home for the break?” he asked then, room quieted down from all the laughter. The fall break, starting tomorrow, you remembered. You’d thought about going home, but had opted to text your parents that you were staying, wanting honestly to stay in your dorm room and work on assignments and organization and just lull in bed, instead of being taken up, down and everywhere in your hometown. You shook your head. 

“Really? Me neither,” he said, brows raised. “Won’t you get lonely?” 

You giggled shyly. “Maybe a little.” 

“We could hang out,” he breathed, and at that you tasted the boundary between you, felt it firm under your fingertips, because you couldn’t discern whether he was protecting his friend’s baby sister or if he actually liked talking to you, and your heart beat and yearned and hoped for the latter. 

“Yeah, okay,” you nodded, melting when you saw his smile reach his eyes. 

“Didn’t you always like, uh, Mario Kart? You always wanted to play with me and Vern,” Seokmin said, but he was looking distantly into the window. You almost wanted to cry because he remembered you, remembered things that you liked. “I got it on my Playstation, we can play tomorrow.” 

“I’d like that,” you said.

Then Seokmin was loaning you his hoodie, and, bathed in his warm, tender smell, he followed you home under the moon, glaring at Jeonghan on his way out. 

“Keep the hoodie,” he’d said, smiling sheepishly when you stood in front of your dorm door. “It’s cute.” 

He patted your head and left, thankfully before he could see how red your face was, and how you were absolutely about to blow up from unfiltered joy. You shuffled into your dorm room and tried to soothe the basking butterflies in your stomach and your burning heart. 

Was he standing right across from you on that line, waiting to cross? _____________________________

Giselle woke up just early enough to catch you switching between different button-up dresses, throwing one on, looking in the mirror, and deciding to try another. She was groggy and tired and somewhat hungover, and needed to catch a train, so she could get back home. 

“What are you doing?” she cried, rubbing her eyes. You scurried back and forth trying on another dress, considering white tights, then white socks, then adjusting the tone and volume of your blush.

“I’m-” you gasped in between your hard labor, “I’m seeing a boy!” 

This caught Giselle’s attention. She shot straight up in her bed and looked at you with huge eyes. “No way!”

“Yeah way!” you giggled deviously. You turned around to face her. “What do you think of this outfit?” 

“You look cute!” Giselle praised, nodding to your red strawberry dress and your knee-highs. You slumped. There it was again - cute. Not hot, not pretty, but cute. That was what you were; like a child, like the kid Seokmin knew years ago, like his best friend’s baby sister. Nothing more.

“Who is this mystery guy?” Apparently Giselle was too busy rubbing sleep out of her eyes to see how her compliment had deflated you.

“It’s Seokmin. My-”

“Your brother’s best friend?!” She gasped. It was one shock after another from you that morning. “I wanna say I’m disappointed in you, but.. If you pull this off you’re way freakier than me.” 

“We’re not gonna have sex!” you groaned, pouting as you hastily shoved on your shoes. “We’re gonna play Mario Kart.” 

“Right, this cute guy just invited you over for Mario Kart and nothing else, I get it,” Giselle said sarcastically. 

“You don’t know him,” you mumbled defensively, shoes on and now staring at yourself in the mirror once more. “Cute,” the mirror spat at you.

“All men are the same,” Giselle rolled her eyes and threw herself back on the bed. You snorted and began to walk out the door.

“Y/n, wait!” 

“Hm?” 

Halfway out the door, a tote bag slung over your shoulder and ready to step into the sunlight, you peered back into the room. Giselle, in her sweats and hair fussed, stumbled blindly towards the door. She reached into her pocket and produced a-

“A condom?!” you shrieked, outraged. And not just any condom: a condom in white packaging with the lettering “I ❤️ DILFS”. You truly did not understand how Giselle managed to be a caricature of herself time after time.

“You need to wear protection, he’s in a frat, right?” she shrugged. You glared at her. “I’m not bringing a condom.” 

“Alright, I guess,-” Giselle pretended to think, “I guess, you’ll just have to get chlamydia.” 

You stared at her for a moment, bristling. Then you snatched it out of her outstretched hand.

“You’re unbelievable.” 

“You’re a prude.” 

“Goodbye, Giselle!” 

The condom slipped into your tote with ease to lay snug with all your other items and then you were out the door and heading towards Seokmin’s frat house. The sun was dulled by a few clouds, but it was still shining. Leaves were turning brown and red and yellow and were falling from trees to crunch underfoot - everything was lovely.

But the expanse, in your head, was much different. In your head you were traveling the soft dunes of a desert, spotting in the brown and red and yellow horizon a cleft in the sand. When you reached it, wide and long, seemingly endless to each side of you, you were standing right in front of Seokmin’s house.

You weren’t sure how long you stood there, knuckles white where you grasped your tote, and eyes big and heart pounding. What if Giselle was right? Did you want her to be right? Would you even be able to please him if she was? Half-heartedly you tried to push away the images of Seokmin pushing into you, arms flexing on either side of your head, that spawned alongside the thought. Maybe you straddling him, his hands on your ass, his head buried in your chest, or-

“Y/N!” 

You jumped, clutching your bag tight, when you snapped your head up to the voice. It was Seokmin and he was waving at you from his upstairs-window, smiling so brightly you swore the sun reflected off of his teeth. 

“What are you standing there for, come inside! Door’s unlocked!” he yelled, body disappearing in the window. You stared at the window for a moment, his presence now absent, before you nodded to yourself in reassurance. You could do this, right? Just Mario Kart and small talk.

Truth was, you couldn’t do this. Not even in the slightest. You and Seokmin sat cross-legged on his bed, TV on the wall before it, drinking soda and crunching on chips. Seokmin was drenched in a green, fuzzy sweater, collarbones peeking over the rounded neck, and fingers peeking through the sleeves, where he held his controller, and God forbid, his hair was all soft and fluffy, and he was wearing fucking puppy socks. 

And he was competitive, too. He was leaned forward, eyes narrowed as he sped through the course. You huffed when he blue-shelled you, and you tried to refocus.

“I thought you said you were good?” he teased, eyes leaving the screen for only a second to look at you - you, dress bunched up to your thighs and tongue peeking through your pretty, subtly red lips. A second was all that was necessary. 

Suddenly, his character (baby Daisy) swerved off-course, falling into the pit below and he screeched, seemingly genuinely sad, as your character (Toadette) overtook him, the little gold badge popping up in the corner to tell you that you were number one. 

“What were you saying?” you giggled cockily when you finished the last round, Seokmin unable to quite catch up to you in the last stretch. He threw himself back on the bed in defeat, groaning into his hand.

“I can’t believe I let you win,” he cried.

“Let me?” you repeated in disbelief. You scoffed and put down the controller, pretending that Seokmin lying all angelic on his bed sheets wasn’t making your stomach pinch with static. “Pretty sure that was just pure skill on my part. Don’t blame me because you’re bad at Mario Kart.” 

A blow to his talents in Mario Kart was a blow to him. He snapped his head up to look at you, playfully angry. “Oh, oh wow, really? I’m bad at Mario Kart now?” 

“Mhm,” you hummed, smiling cheekily at him. Seokmin studied you for a moment, before he shuffled into a sitting position. His gaze almost made you shy. Did he want to kiss you as much as you wanted to kiss him?

Seokmin shuffled closer to you and you almost stopped breathing: “Don’t I remember you being ticklish?” 

You were almost so caught up in your fantasy to realize what he said. Your eyes widened in realization and you most immediately tried to twist your body away: a punishment was upon you.

“No- NO!-” You cried out but it was too late. Seokmin wrestled his body into yours, fingers dancing and prodding into your sides. Drowning in laughter, your face twisted into tortured pleasure, as you tried to bat his hands away. Your attempts were futile - each time you shuffled away, he followed right with you, fingers unrelenting as your torso twisted and turned. 

"Hehehehehehe- NO, PLEASE!- hehehehehehe!” 

Your knees pushed with all their might and you were almost able to drag yourself to the edge of the bed. There, you could gain distance and talk him down from beyond his desk. But Seokmin was smart. He sensed your escape plan when you squirmed away, and without much thought, he pulled his body on top of yours, weight pinning you down. 

You were still giggling and squirming, when his fingers finally let up. You were both panting from the excitement, Seokmin smiling down at you adoringly. Then, both of your smiles dropped.

It was like it took a few moments to realize; he was straddling you. Hips pushed into yours, all his weight rested on your crotch - your crotch, which was now pulsating. To make matters worse, the skirt of your dress had ridden up and most of your plush thighs were now visible to him, and your chest was halfway out of your dress, and your cheeks were flushed and your hair was spread out on the sheets beneath you. Seokmin seemed unsure of where to put his hands, while you both stared at each other, breathing in the thick, heavy silence.

“I’m sorry-”

“It’s okay, I-” 

“I really- I don’t know what-” 

“Don’t worry-” 

You were pulling down your dress again, cheeks literally flaming red and bottom lip caught between your teeth. Silence swallowed you both whole. 

You wanted him back on your hips so bad. It hurt. You were aching in quick pulses, but you couldn’t even look at him. Surely, you thought, surely, he’d seen that look on your face, how your eyes clouded over with lust. Maybe he felt disgusted. 

“I better-” you hiccupped, voice small, “I better go.” 

Seokmin, eyes peeking at you through his lashes, feared he made you uncomfortable.

“Yeah, of course,” he mumbled.

You gathered your things and ran out of there, wetness gushing out of you. You tried to run, tried to create distance, but this time, in your mind’s eye, you ran in place, staying completely still by the cleft separating you and Seokmin. You fiddled with the edge, sand cascading into the empty, endless dark. 

There was no way you could make that jump.

That night you wished Giselle was by your side. You wrote an assignment, trying to ward off the embarrassment that stormed in your brain, when you got a message, that plunged you into rock bottom:

Lee Seokmin: hey you forgot smth at my house lol

Lee Seokmin: *Image Attached*

This was it. You were going to jump off a bridge (or a cleft in a dry, sandy wasteland).

As if your life couldn’t get anymore embarrassing: it was the condom. The white condom with “I ❤️ DILFS” on it. You damned that woman for ever making you bring it. What must he have thought of you? His best friend’s little sister trying to get in his pants? Your cheeks were burning and you threw your head into your pillow and screeched. Your life was over. It had simply ended now. There was no coming back from this. You huffed and removed yourself from its plushness. 

Maybe you could salvage it? Thinking on your feet, you replied:

You: OMG i’m so sorry!!!! i think that’s my roommate’s, she must’ve put it in my bag… :/ 

You: I’ll come pick it up ASAP :(((( 

You stared at your phone at the blatant. It was not a far stretch from the truth, but being caught with your hand in the cookie jar - or maybe more so the I ❤️ DILFS condom in your tote bag - it seemed like an irrationally shitty cover up. 

You gnawed at your lip when the three dots popped up next to his picture, and bit it to pieces waiting for his reply. You almost jumped when your phone buzzed:

Lee Seokmin: hahahahaha

Lee Seokmin: you can come pick it up tomorrow if u want? theres no rush 

You glared at the message. Laughter? Surely he hadn’t bought it. He was just trying to be nice, just trying to avoid you any embarrassment. The thought made you wanna throw up, how he felt this obligation to be nice to you when you had permanently scarred him (were you being dramatic?).

You: ok. im rlly sorry again!! i’ll pick it up tomorrow _____________________________

Tomorrow came much faster than you had hoped. No amount of tossing and turning could slow down the passage of time, and by the time you received Seokmin’s promised “I’m awake”-message, the embarrassment hadn’t faded one bit. 

Every discouraged moment of getting ready was haunted by your current situation, and you stopped to cringe every five seconds, causing an honest and diligent self-hatred to bubble within you. When you knocked on Seokmin’s door, you’d honestly never felt less confident in your life.

“Y/n!” he said enthusiastically. 

“Seokmin,” you said, less enthusiastic. 

He smiled at you sweetly, almost as sympathetically, before stepping aside. You furrowed your brow, not really understanding why he couldn’t just hand it to you at the door, but stepping inside nonetheless. “It’s in my room,” he offered, but could he not just have brought it with him? Did he have to prolong the shame even further? You followed him to his room.

In that moment you hated Seokmin for being who he was; for being sweet, gentle, caring, and gentlemanly. You would feel less pathetic if he yelled at you, if he was genuinely disgusted and wanted nothing to do with you. But there he was all smiling and supportive, and he wasn’t touching you at all, but he still felt like pillars on your back, soothing you and holding you up. 

“It was your roommate’s?” he asked absently as you traversed the halls. “Uh, yeah,” you answered sheepishly. 

“I can tell,” he threw his head back to you, and there was a huge grin on his face. A little bit of hope blossomed in your chest. “Yeah, I saw her at that party, you know? I think she slept with, uh, my friend, Minghao.” 

“That’ll be her,” you were smiling now too, and a huge wave of relief washed over you, as he at least let you believe that he thought it wasn’t your perversion bringing along that condom. 

Finally stumbling into his room, he did indeed pick it up from his desk, handing it back to you. You looked at it in his outstretched hand and blushed sheepishly. “Thanks,” you squeaked. 

Seokmin nodded in response. For a moment the two of you stood, uncertain of what to do and caught in the web of a terribly awkward silence. Seokmin’s eyes darted to the window and yours to the floor. 

“Hey, uh,” he giggled a little, scratching the back of his head. “I feel really bad for losing that Mario Kart game-”

You scoffed in response, but the facade of being peeved was falling apart, as you beamed up at him. 

“Maybe we could do, like, a quick rematch?” 

You shrugged, trying to be nonchalant with an ever-heavy flush in your cheeks: “I don’t back away from a challenge.” 

Seokmin won the rematch. This only spurred on another rematch, and suddenly there was no end to the madness. This time there was no awkwardness, no lingering silences. You were just giggling and strategizing, and throwing heat in the direction of your opponents. 

That uncomfortable, clamoring feeling left you, slowly. It became easy to forget it. That feeling that he was only there with you because of Vernon, that there was always some sort of demand, a twisting hand, forcing him upon you, and that you became a sort of burden on him. That was the thing about Seokmin, though, his ability to make you feel like his best friend; his ability to make him feel like he was there for you, even when he wasn’t.

It was only after an hour and a half or so, when Seokmin paused the game. 

“What the hell, Lee? I was just about to beat you!” you whined, crossing your arms. He nodded along, pushing himself off the bed. “Yes, I agree, which is why I’ve assessed that I need a refreshment.” 

“Oh, you’ve assessed?” 

“Yeah, I’ve assessed that I need a fresh, cooling drink in my gullet.” 

You both laughed a little and slumped back, dropping the controller. Seokmin smiled at you, eyes twinkling. “You want one?” 

“What are you getting?” 

“A beer,” Seokmin said. Rationally, you knew you shouldn’t accept. You were bad with alcohol, and everytime you drank just a little, a little easily became a lot. That was why you took yourself by surprise when your voice left your mouth, chipper and grand: “Sure!” 

One beer turned into another, and Mario Kart turned into talking on his bed, slumped into his fortress of pillows and giggling at his stories. You were a little tipsy, halfway into your second beer and your face was flushed and Seokmin was lying on his side, hand propped up under his head, as he made you laugh again. 

“Your kind of partying sounds… Extreme,” you murmured, rim of the bottle pushed against your lips where your words slightly slurred. Mario Kart and alcohol had gotten you a little out of your shell, and now you and Seomin were talking like friends - as if your brother didn’t even exist. You basked in the alcoholic buzz and in this reality, this hideout, where your lovely brother didn’t exist and the faint ache in your legs at Seokmin’s godly face in the bedside lamp wasn’t so utterly misplaced. 

“I think anything’s more extreme than your partying,” Seokmin mused teasingly. You huffed, putting down your beer and smoothing over your skirt. Everything was so lovely and artificially yellow and his body beside yours radiated pleasant heat. He was beautiful, you thought, looking at how the sweaters pooled on his torso and how his brown hair looked so soft and messy. You almost felt the absence of ground beneath you, when you imagined yourself at the cleft again.

“You don’t know about my kind of partying,” you joked and he chuckled softly. “You’re right, I shouldn’t make assumptions.” 

You looked at him and he was suddenly serious. The smiley, gooey Seokmin was gone and his eyes, although not threatening at all, were prodding at you. Your smile fell. The alcohol at this time felt misplaced and wrong, the lightness felt wrong.

“Were you gonna, you know, go with Jeonghan at the party?” he whispered. The world was suddenly very quiet, as if it were following Seokmin’s tact. You grimaced a little. “No. No, not really.” 

He studied you. You couldn’t bear to meet his eyes, opting to look at your hands in your lap. “Why not?” 

A pause.

You began to pick at your own fingertips, nails digging into the cuticles. Seokmin’s eyes dragged from your face to your hands, and he scooted closer to you, only to cover your hand with his, stopping your movements immediately. Suddenly so close, his voice was whispered right in your ear, so soft and so gentle, it felt like a kiss: “Don’t do that.” 

You sucked in a breath, hands ripping to your sides to lay stiff. “I’m, uh, I’m not that experienced, so I..”

Your eyes flicked up to gauge his reaction. In your worst nightmares, you imagined a laugh breaking onto his face, maybe disgust, but you felt yourself melting. He looked at you so softly, like you were the most precious, fragile thing and his hand had stilled in the air after you pushed it off, as if, like the most enchanting artwork at a museum, he fought desperately not to reach out and touch you. 

It was unbearable - how still the air had become, how heavy you felt, how your chest struggled to expand. You talked again, if only to fill the air with your babbling: “I’ve not had.. I mean, I can hardly get myself off… So. I probably. Couldn’t. Get him off.” 

You realized about halfway through your sentence that you should not have said that. That last half of your sentence was a breathy mess, as your voice became shaky with humiliation. His gaze, a delicate constant, was not helping either. You felt tears welling up in your eyes suddenly and maybe that was the worst part. 

“You have trouble getting yourself off?” he repeated, as if to make sure. “Like masturba-” 

“Yeah, that,” you squeezed your eyes shut. You couldn’t tell if you wanted him to shut up forever, so you’d never have to know his reaction, or if you wanted him to talk and be able to sense how this information changed his perception of you. His voice came, in spite of whatever you had hoped.

“I figured you were a virgin,” he mumbled, voice half muted by the palm of his hand, “but I thought you at least masturbated-” 

“I do!” you defended yourself, voice much louder than his and brows furrowing and tears threatening to spill over your eyes. “I’m just- I’m not that good at it.” 

“Hey,” he said softly, hand landing on your arm. You immediately shut up, lip trembling when you struggled to meet his eyes. “Relax, Y/n. It’s okay. I’m not judging you.” 

You nodded half-heartedly, still incredibly uneasy. 

“If you want…” Seokmin’s voice trailed off. His eyes ventured over your form briefly, licking his lips. “You know, if you want, I could teach you.” 

You looked at him silently. He seemed to snap out of whatever loopy trance he had been sucked into, because he was suddenly very jittery and scrambling through the bedsheets. “Uh, I mean- you don’t- God, I’m sorry- it was only if-” 

“Yes,” you said. His scrambling stilled immediately. His eyes were teacups. 

“You sure?” 

You nodded, not trusting your own voice. 

Seokmin squeezed his eyes shut, gulping as he sat back against the bed. His legs spread apart. “Come here,” he patted his thighs. 

You felt terribly sober. All that buzz and butterflies and blaze and blossom was gone and you felt like a doll, moving each limb individually, as you climbed into his lap, back to him. You were unable to think, unable to truly process what was happening, what it meant, as you felt his form engulf yours.

His hands found purchase on your hips and his breath was warm on your neck, as you felt every ridge of his abdomen on your back. His thumbs rubbed against your hip bone. 

“Okay, now show me how you usually do it,” his voice was a warm hum, a twinge of nervousness laced in it. Your face was lit ablaze and you squirmed in his hold, when one hand left your hip to gently push your legs apart. You sat, all open and held against him, dress keeping you covered.

“It’s embarrassing,” you huffed, being very serious, but Seokmin smiled and nosed your hair gently. 

“We can stop whenever you want, seriously, if you get uncomfortable, we stop” he reassured. 

“It’s just me.” 

It was. It was just Seokmin, your brothers best friend, the sweetest boy in the world, who used to have a swanky bowl cut and dorky school uniform and who was always Vernon’s most respectful friend, but he was hot and whispering into your ear and one hand was massaging the outside of your thigh. 

“Should I take my dress off?” you breathed, face turned halfway back to him. His hands squeezed at you in response and you could faintly make out his tongue sliding over his lips. 

“Only if you want, angel,” he whispered back, rubbing your sides tenderly. “We’re not doing anything you don’t want. Whatever makes you feel good. ‘M just here to help.” 

You nodded, and although the answer was maybe made to make you keep your dress on - a reassurance that there was no need to discard it - you removed yourself from his grasp, hands coming to tug your dress off. You felt a small boost of confidence when you heard Seokmin breathe out: “Shit.” 

Only in your bra and panties (terribly mismatched, your bra was black and your panties were pink), you leaned back into his hold, and you noted how Seokmin’s warm hands were much more careful now, splaying out on your bare skin. 

“Are you comfortable now?” he asked quietly. You nodded. He propped his head up on your shoulder, eyes cast down your almost-nude body, chest rising and falling. Your legs were closed again, he noticed, and his veiny hand reached down to open them again. “Show me how you do it, baby, so I can help you improve.” 

You gummed your lip, breathing in one last time, before your nervous fingers began dancing their way to your panties. They disappeared under the fabric for only a moment, before Seokmin spoke again.

“Sweetheart,” he tutted, hand wrapping around your wrist to stop its track. “Don’t just dive right in, you need to get yourself all hot first.” 

Your brows furrowed and some of the embarrassment you felt from being this exposed and pressed into Seokmin evaporated into genuine confusion.

“What? What do you mean?” you said, somewhat outraged, and Seokmin couldn’t help the laughter blooming in his chest at that. He vibrated against your back, hands smoothing down your arm. You pouted: “Don’t laugh at me, Minnie.” 

He stopped, still smiling as he nosed your temple. “I’m sorry, baby,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to your head, that had your heart beating out of your chest. “You’re just so cute.” 

Cute. You remembered your disdain for that word, but somehow, when it came from his lips, it made you beam. Everywhere he touched left behind a hot, burning ghost on your skin.

“You just have to touch your body, sweetheart,” he said sweetly. You thrashed in defiance, crying out quietly with red cheeks. Wiggling your body angrily, you felt his dick half-hard in his pants against your lower back. 

“Can’t you do it?” you whined, wanting nothing more than for him to take over and make you feel good. He sucked in a harsh breath behind you, fingers wrapping around your hands to soothe you still. He seemed to debate your proposal, but eventually he kissed your shoulder and spoke: “Okay, baby, but you have to show me you understand, alright?” you nodded feverishly. “We’re trying to get you to learn.” 

The whole thing had you dizzy, warm and gooey in his hands, and grounding yourself on his solid torso. You had tunnel vision, unable to focus on anything but his warm hands and sweet voice, and how fucking hard he was. You leaned your head up to look at him pleadingly. Even upside-down he was pretty. He giggled at your starstruck expression.

“Look at my hands, pretty,” he tapped your nose and you scrunched it, turning down to your own body, where he sat his hands on your waist. “You do it like this.” 

His hands started dragging over your skin, creating constellations of ghosts on your skin. One dragged across your stomach and down your leg, squeezing it along the way, and the other brushed over your bra-covered chest, landing on your shoulder and collarbones. Then they moved oppositely, then diverged from their chosen paths, and you started breathing heavily. Pressure built up in your stomach and your panties, and you felt how slick started leaking out of you. 

“Feel good?” Seokmin grinned against your neck, listening to the melody of your panted gasps. You nodded earnestly, moaning softly. Seokmin furrowed his brows at that noise, pressing kisses to your neck appreciatively. “Good girl. Such pretty sounds.” 

Both of Seokmin’s hands dragged up to your ribs. There, they paused. “Can I touch your chest, baby?” 

“Please,” you whimpered, and earned another sloppy kiss to the cheek. His hands immediately grabbed ahold of your chest, softly rubbing it over your bra. 

“Does that feel good?” he whispered. You hesitated for a moment. “Um, I don’t feel much, honestly.” 

You’d expect him to be a little angry or defensive, but Seokmin only hummed and nustled himself into your hair. “Good girl. Good girl, being so honest with me. So pretty.” 

You whined at his praise and Seokmin smiled smugly, taking notice of how heated you got from his words. 

“The- the fabric is in the way..” you whimpered meekly, and Seokmin nodded in understanding, stroking your sides soothingly. 

“You want to take off your bra?” he hummed, truly as if it would not expose you to him, as if it weren’t a lewd and depraved scenario, but something as simple as the weather. You nodded, removing yourself from the harbor of his arms once more to remove it. You unclipped it and threw it God knows where, before settling back into him. Seokmin peeked over your shoulder at your now bare breasts, groaning a little and covering it up with a cough. This was about you. 

Seokmin placed his hands on your tits again, massaging and rubbing the soft skin, before he brushed his thumbs over your hardened nipples.

You moaned - for the first time it was a clear moan, seething from your throat and puffing into the air. “Sound so pretty,” he muttered in your ear. “You really like that, hm?”

He pinched your nipples between his fingers, your back arching into his warm hands. Then, as soon as the pleasure had begun, it stopped, when his hands came to rest on the bed. You whined, twisting your head towards his, only to be stopped by fingers on your chin, turning you back forward. “Show me you can do it now, baby. You’re learning,” he reminded you.

 “But, Minnie, I want your hands,” you whined and he tutted softly in your ear. “I know, baby, but I need to know that you’re understanding this in that pretty little head of yours. Need to know you’re focusing. Come on, show me now.” 

Huffing, you placed your own hands (they somehow felt more foreign than his now) on your stomach and began to mimic his movements. You smoothed them up and down on your body, squeezing, then placed them on your chest, rubbing and pinching your nipples. 

“There you go,” he praised, and his hands had traveled to your shoulders, massaging them gently. You whimpered and turned your head to him again.

“Can you teach me how to touch my…” you trailed off.

“Your pussy?” he offered, as if it was nothing, as if it wasn’t vulgar or lewd. You nodded vigorously. Feeling him gulp a little, his hands became a little unsteady as they came to hold your waist again. “Can I hear you say it? Baby?” he asked and suddenly his voice was a little shaky, a little breathless. 

“Can you touch my pussy now, Minnie?” you asked, and any shame had been clouded over with lust. You’d never been this burningly bothered in your life, you needed him to touch you. He groaned, and this time he was unable to cover it up. You felt how his hard cock strained against his sweatpants, how it pressed into your back, and you wanted to touch it so bad. 

“Alright, baby, want your panties off?” His sharp nose was pressed into your hair. You shook your head. “Want them on.” 

He nodded. “Alright, jus’ tell me if you wanna stop, okay? I’m gonna touch you now.” 

His hand slipped under the waistband of your panties, disappearing under the pink fabric. As if they were always meant to be there, his fingers slipped through your folds, coming down to circle your slit in impossibly light figurations. 

“Shit,” he panted, grip on your waist suddenly bruising, as he tried to steady himself. “You’re so wet, baby, you like Seokminnie that much?” 

“Yeah, I do,” you nodded blindly, your own hands coming to grip onto his thighs. His middle finger danced upwards and pressed against your clit, and you immediately squeaked and shut your legs around his hand. 

“No, no, baby, don’t do that,” he frowned, hand that wasn’t buried in your pussy spreading your legs again. You felt how his legs, pressed against you, came to hook onto yours, forcing your legs apart with his own strength. He hummed in content. 

His finger pressed onto your clit again, and he felt how your legs tensed, straining against his to close. Your back arched and you moaned, eyes squeezed shut. He began rubbing it, and it was so intimate, how close you were to him, how his hand navigated your sopping wet pussy, fingers just rubbing you gently, and how bare you were, his eyes training over your bouncing tits when you thrashed. 

His fingers moved downwards again, gathering the wetness that was gushing out of you. Then, one long middle finger pushed into you. Canting into his hand, you moaned loudly and turned your head into his neck. Nosing the tan skin and inhaling his faint cologne, you began mindlessly kitten-licking the skin. His Adam's apple bopped under your tongue.

“You’re so tight,” he rasped, beginning to slowly push his finger in and out of you. His other hand had come to wrap around your waist in an attempt to calm the sudden bucking of your hips against his hand. 

His hand moved faster, obscene, wet sounds coming from your ruined underwear, where he worked diligently into your pussy. He slipped another finger in, and you cried from the stretch. It was becoming hard to contain you, thrashing and writhing against his hold, stuck between wanting to move closer and to move away entirely. His fingers tied a knot in your stomach.

“That’s right, pretty, tell me how good Minnie’s fingers feel,” he whispered hoarsely above your ear. You could almost only whine and moan, nipping at his neck a little. “Tell me or I’ll stop,” he warned.

“Feels so good!” you whined immediately, because if he stopped now, you figured you might start crying. “Feel so, so, so good, fuck, Seokmin, I’m-” 

“I know, baby, I know, but I’m teaching you, right?” 

Though your mind was fuzzy, you sensed what these words meant and panicked, hand coming down to grip his wrist in an attempt to hold him in place. “Please, please, please, Seokmin, don’t stop, please, don’t stop!” 

“Don’t talk back to me, sweetheart. I won’t stop, just talk to me. Tell me what you feel me doing,” pushing your head up again, Seokmin pressed his face against your cheek, so hard, you felt his humid pants against it. 

Your mind was so hazy, so transfixed on the feeling in your stomach and his finger in your pussy, you could hardly respond. 

“Tell me or I’ll stop, baby,” he reminded you again, and you scrambled frantically to focus. 

“Nngh! You’re- pushing in and out-” your voice broke, hips stuttering against his hand, that was continuing its remorseless pace. 

“Yeah, and?”

You furrowed your brows, lips trembling. “You’re- you’re curling them- A-ah!” 

“That’s right. Such a good girl. So smart and clever for me,” Seokmin whispered happily, his other hand slipping down your stomach to circle your clit. Both his hands working pleasure into your pussy, you cried out loudly, head pushed back into his chest.

“Just let go, baby, I can feel you clenching on me so hard. Wan’ me to stay in your pussy forever, hm? Just let go, cum whenever you want, wanna see your pretty face so bad,” somehow Seokmin was just as intoxicated off of lust as you, despite staying, hard and untouched, in his pants. But he babbled mindless praise to you, and you came to his sweet voice whispering in your ear.

Your orgasm sent you hurdling over the edge - the edge, the one you’d been standing at hopelessly for years. You flew across it and landed on Seokmin’s territory; in his arms. 

“Seokmin, a-ah!” you cried, releasing all over his fingers, coating them in your cum. Your entire body arched upwards, as you moaned into the night. Seokmin rode you through your high, pressing sweet kisses into your hair.

You fell limp against his body, worn out, when he finally retracted his fingers from your pussy. You snuggled into his sweater with a content hum. 

Seokmin smiled down at you, eyes brimming with fondness, as his cum-slicked hands wrapped around your torso in a hug, holding you into him. “You did so well,” he whispered genuinely. 

You looked up at him with a tired smile. “Thank you, Seokmin.” 

He held himself back from saying he would do that a thousand times over, in fact, he wouldn’t mind never pulling out - he could live with only one hand. Instead, he pressed a kiss to your forehead and whispered: “Of course, darling.” 

Your brows furrowed and you pulled yourself away from him a little, eyeing the tent in his pants worriedly. “Do you want me to-” 

“No,” he shook his head decidedly. “No, I’ll take care of it.” 

You looked at him with big, innocent eyes, that only furthered the throbbing of his cock. Partially, he wanted to give in so badly. The thought of your hand around his cock, all pouty and innocent and confused, and how heavy it would be in your small hand, had made him cum more times than he’d like to admit. But, he reminded himself, this was about you. This was a favor. “Are you sure?” you asked softly.

“Yes, baby, go to bed. I’m gonna go get you some fresh clothes.” 

You snuggled into bed while Seokmin scurried away to fetch a shirt and some boxers, and when he came back you cooperated limply in taking off your panties, and putting on what he’d given you. You fell asleep in his bed, cuddling his duvet, and surrounded by his scent. 

Seokmin watched you in adoration. How peaceful you looked, chest rising and falling, and a little pout on your lips. 

He wandered through the house, trying simultaneously to get as far from you as possible, and also trying to decide which of his housemates he currently hated the most. He landed on Jeonghan, slipping into his empty room and settling himself on the bed.

There, he fisted his solid fucking cock and bucked into his own hand, eyes squeezed shut to remember how you looked under his hands, how you begged for him, how well you listened, what a good girl you were for him. His moans were trembling and muffled by his own hand, and when he came, he felt momentarily smug, looking at how it dripped over Jeonghan’s sheets (served him right). Then, post-nut clarity sank in, as he reentered his own room and cuddled into you on the bed. 

He felt almost despicable. He felt gross and evil and perverted and lewd, not because of you, but because, as if it were his first time realizing it, he remembered that you were Vernon’s sister. He remembered that he had promised to protect you from manipulative guys and always watch over you, and help you if you needed help, and report to Vernon if you were acting weird. Yet here he was, letting you cum on his hand and groping your tits, as if he was still that teenage boy with that swanky bowl cut. 

After an hour of chewing on his lips and frowning, Seokmin let your sweet perfume lull him to sleep. He dreamt of you. _____________________________

There’s a blissful instant that morning when you wake up, curled into Seokmin’s arms, head nuzzled in his chest. There’s a blissful instant when you tilt your head, staring at his sleeping face, and he’s so beautiful, features all soft and breathing rhythmically. There’s a blissful instant where you see him, and your heart weeps in your chest because he’s so gorgeous.

Then it’s gone.

A panic button is pressed in your head, and your nerve-endings, each one resting on him, begin burning. What had you done? Yesterday feels like a faraway dream, but he’s still wearing that sweater and it grounds you in the reality of what had happened. 

You’re lost. What did this mean for the two of you? Was Seokmin just lusting after you? But that couldn’t be right, you thought, because he’d insisted on only helping you, refused your offers to help him, which now was making you rot in his arms with guilt. Was this genuinely an attempt to help you? To be diligently by your side at the request of your brother? But surely this had been outside of the realm of what was acceptable to help your best friend’s baby sister with? Did that mean he liked you? 

Seokmin awakened from your sudden squirming, as if, with enough shaking and turning, that feelings and thoughts would just fall out of you. They didn’t, they stayed right where they were, and all you were given in return was Seokmin’s eyes fluttering open. 

You watched him go through that same process; the bliss came first and then the panic. Seokmin’s eyes went from adoring to wide and grave and suddenly he was shuffling away from you on the bed, creating a cool distance between you on the landscape of his mattress. You didn’t miss the pink dusting his cheeks.

“Uh- good morning,” he mumbled, and he could only look at his hands. Your throat was unbelievably dry. “Morning.” 

You’re not sure how you both managed, but you went through that morning without mentioning the previous night even once. The air was thick with tension, fleeting glances, and shaky hands, while Seokmin made you both bowls of oatmeal. You stood on the other side of the counter in his shirt and his boxers. 

You ate in his bed. It was silent and heavy and each clink of spoons against the bowl-rims had you both wincing. He put on a TV-show and you sat across from one another, chewing wordlessly to some drama in the background. Your belly was pooling with tension and light cascaded onto you, revealing your pores and flaws. Were you a bad person?

Finally, finally, Seokmin put down his spoon with yet another clink, fingers catching the bridge of his nose and eyes squeezing shut. He huffed into the palm of his hand, swallowing the oatmeal hard. 

“Uh-” he began and his voice cracked, “Y/n. About last night-” 

But you cut him off, and he couldn’t ever, even in his wildest dreams, have imagined that these words would come out of your mouth:

“I want to return the favor.” 

The words were almost spat and discarded, as if they’d been sitting on the tip of your tongue all morning with a foul taste, and you’d only now been able to rid yourself of it. Seokmin snapped his head towards you, a genuine surprise on his face, but he soon wished he hadn’t looked at all. 

You were so pretty, sitting cross legged in his shirt and a blush creeping up your neck and cheeks all shiny in the morning sun. And there was this innocence to your eyes, big lashes shadowing it only a little; this earnestness that told him you really, really wanted to do this for him.

“I-” he chuckled a little, heart clenching at your sweetness, “I can’t ask you to do that.” 

“Well, it’s good that I’m asking you then,” you said, and though the comment was witty, when Seokmin looked at you again, he saw how careful you looked, and how unsure you were of yourself. 

“Listen, N/n,” he reached out to grab your hand, and it was burning into yours, each area of adjoined skin screaming at you with reminders of last night. “You don’t have to do that. I just wanted to make you feel good, I was happy to just be of service to you-” 

“But I want to make you feel good,” you pouted, almost brattily. Seokmin’s gentle expression and tone faded into something darker, as his eyes flitted down to your exposed legs and your heaving chest. He swallowed, putting away his bowl of oatmeal and collecting himself. 

“Are you sure? You need to be absolutely 100% sure-” 

“I’m sure, Minnie. I want to-” you broke off your own words with a squeak, face becoming bright red. You leaned in self-consciously, as if to tell him a secret: “I want to suck your dick.” 

Your whispered admittance had him groaning, groaning at how sweet and innocent your voice was, how you couldn’t even say it loudly, you had to whisper the dirty word to him. He wanted you so badly, wanted to be the one to take away your innocence, to make you all dirty and beg for him, to make you thrash and whine and to teach you how to really feel good. He wanted you.

It’s like a switch had flipped, when Seokmin put his hand on the back of your head, and suddenly you were kissing again. The tension from before was replaced with something wholly different, something hot, something laced in the eye contact he gave you, before he leaned it again. 

And Seokmin was kissing you with a fervor that you recognized from yourself - you both wanted to forget. Wanted to forget Vernon, who, although a great brother and friend, had become a heavy strain on your relationship with Seokmin. So you kissed him and let his tongue in your mouth when it swiped over your bottom lip, and you sucked on it, and you let him and yourself get lost in each other.

The sound of smacking lips and saliva was so lewd too, especially when Seokmin’s hand pulled you from your spot on the bed and into his lap, hands roaming your body, while you tangled into his hair. He was half-moaning into your mouth by the time he pulled away, face flushed and eyes darker and lower and lips swollen red. 

“You gonna let me use that pretty mouth, baby?” he whispered against your lips, one hand palming over his cock through his boxers. You nodded, almost desperately, one hand reaching out to his in his lap. “Can I touch it?” 

Seokmin smiled fondly, looking down at where your small hand was outstretched towards his cock. “Yeah, baby, go ahead.” 

You were a bit clumsy at first, but soon enough you found its outline in his black boxers and you squeezed it a little. Seokmin crooked over, groaning into your shoulder. You felt him get harder and harder against your palm, a small smile at the desperate noises he was making. 

Seokmin had laid his cheek on your shoulder, neck twisting to stare up at you, while you focused solely on touching him, and he hated himself for getting even harder because it was you - you, who he had wanted for so long, who he was hugged into and lying on, while you touched his warm cock.

“You’re so pretty,” he whispered, breathing heavily, and then smiling brightly when you became all sheepish, smiling and looking away, so that you had to pause your actions. He nosed into your neck, regaining some semblance of control over the situation, now that you weren’t touching him, and his breath was warm and humid on your skin. He pressed small kisses up to your jawline, nose flattening against you.

“So, so pretty. Fuck, imagining you with my cock in your mouth, all drooling and shit. Fuck, baby, you gonna let me fuck your mouth?” he rambled, hands finding home on your tits again. You whined and nodded, trying to pry him off of you. Immediately (forever struggling with a little concern that you might’ve changed your mind) he pulls away, looking up at you worriedly. 

“Don’t- don’t touch me, I don’t wanna get.. All hot,” you whispered those words that he had said last night, biting your lip in worry. “I want to do it now.” 

Seokmin melted completely, and in a complete inability to contain his adoration, brushed hair out of your face and pressed a million kisses to your cheeks and your nose. “Okay,” he said in between kisses, and you felt his smile on your skin, “okay, baby. But if it gets too much, tap my thigh three times, okay? If you need anything, if you feel uncomfortable.” 

“Yes, yes,” you huffed, pushing yourself away from him and hopping onto the floor, sinking to your knees before the bed. 

It felt completely unreal - to both of you. How you were suddenly on your knees and how he settled in front of you, bare, thick thighs on either side of your head. Everything was all light and all the places he’d kissed and touched had become holy and glowing on your body. He shimmed his boxers off and you gaped at the sudden exposure of his dick. 

He was hard. Apparently the kissing and groping had been enough, because it slapped against his sweater, leaking silky white liquid from the tip. And he was big - you didn’t exactly have a good point of reference, but you vaguely sensed from Giselle’s words that this was quite a feat. 

And actually seeing it brought a wave of uncertainty on you, not as to whether or not you wanted to do it, but how. So, you blinked up at him with a small frown, voice small when you spoke: “Seokmin.. How- how do I do it?” 

Seokmin practically glowed with adoration, when he petted your head and rubbed your cheek, seemingly so comfortable despite being totally bare. “You just put your lips around it and suck, baby, it’s easy,” he said softly, then added, a little panicked: “And be mindful of your teeth.” 

“But it’s so big,” you marveled, eyes trained on it, and he almost groaned at it, because you sounded so genuinely amazed, so disbelieving. 

“Just put your hands around the parts you can’t reach. I’ll be gentle, baby, don’t worry,” he said. You nodded hesitantly, leaning forward towards it, but his hand in your hair suddenly clenched and pulled you back. You looked up at him and saw his eyes brimming with worry. “You do want this, right?” 

“Yes, please, stop being so- so gentle with me and let me suck your dick!” You whined, fed up with being treated like glass, and tugged his hand out of your hair. Seokmin visibly relaxed at your insistence, nodding. 

Finally, fingers grabbing the base of it, you wrapped your mouth around the tip. You were met immediately with the taste of his pre-cum, licking over where it leaked curiously. Seokmin’s hand found your hair again, gripping it tight to steady himself, as he groaned loudly. You slowly sank down, basking in the whimpers you ripped from his mouth.

“Fuck- you’re- you’re doing so good, baby,” he cried, face twisted in pleasure and head thrown back. You looked up at him and he was so pretty and glowing, panting into the air. 

You sank down as far as you could, feeling the tip sit snug against the back of your mouth, and your hands wrapped around the base of his dick. You looked up at him, experimentally squeezing, and pursing your lips around his dick to suck it carefully.

“A-ah! Fuck!” Seokmin cried, hand that wasn’t in your hair squeezing the edge of his mattress. His thighs were flexing on either side of your head. “You’re- you’re so good at this, sweetheart. Good girl, fuck, such a pretty girl for me, letting me use you like this.” 

You whined at his words, squeezing your thighs together. Seokmin’s hips bucked upwards at the vibrations, hitting the back of your throat. The sudden intrusion was unexpected and you let out a garbled moan around his cock. He panted regretfully: “S-Sorry, baby, d-didn’t mean to do that, you just feel so good. Can- can you bob your head up and down it for me?” 

You did, started moving your head up and down his shaft, and breathing hard through your nose, while your hands squeezed the base of his cock. Looking up at Seokmin, you felt confidence that you were doing something right. He was in heaven, face all scrunched up and breathing as if he’d just ran a marathon. 

And when he peeked his down to you, he could’ve cum immediately. Your pretty lips wrapped around his cock, head bopping with tears in your eyes from the pressure in your throat, and how curious and sparkling they were, gauging his reaction. The groan that clawed its way up from his heart, through his throat and out into his room quickly turned to a whimper. 

“I’m- I’m gonna cum, sweet pea, can I-” he swallowed hard, because even the thought had him close to release. “Can I cum down your throat, pretty?” 

You nodded, a little too preoccupied to answer, but Seokmin got it, and with just a couple more bobs, and the feeling of your wet tongue pressing against the underside of his cock, he spurted into your mouth in long ropes of white, whining at the top of his lungs, and pulling hair from the roots. 

It was, admittedly, a little gross and sticky in your mouth, but it was also hot and you felt proud you’d made him feel good. He was panting, trying to recover, when you pulled off his dick, a satisfied smile on your face. His hand wandered to your face, caressing your cheekbone, before moving down to your puffy lips. 

“Can I-” he was almost embarrassed, “Can I see baby? Can you open your mouth for me?” 

A little confused, you did as told and opened your mouth, sticking out your tongue that was still covered in his sticky release. 

“Fuck,” he groaned at the sight, squeezing his eyes shut and willing himself not to get hard again. “C-Can you swallow it for me, beautiful?” 

Still confused, you nodded and gulped it down, trying not to look like it felt as gross as it did. If Seokmin noticed, he didn’t remark it, because he only groaned again, and pulled you by your face into a sloppy, heated kiss. 

“So, so, so good for me,” he whispered, not letting you out of the kiss, even when saliva dripped down your chin. “Such a good girl, letting me use her mouth, such an obedient, good girl.” 

You whined into his mouth at those words, bothered by the aching in your core that his moans and his blissed out face had caused, and now those words repeated over and over: Good girl.

He grinned into your mouth. “Yeah? You like being my good girl, right? Like doing your best for Seokminnie?” 

“Yes,” you murmured breathlessly, too lost in the feeling of his mouth and his hands rubbing your waist to come up with anything better.

Seokmin pulled away with a warm smile, both hands coming up to cup your cheeks. “You did well,” was all he said, and you could genuinely cry, because that was it - you just wanted to know you did well. 

“I’m gonna go clean up, okay?” he said, waiting for you to nod in response before he pushed himself off the bed, snatching a new pair of boxers from a drawer on his way out of the door. 

You threw yourself on the bed, closing your eyes contentedly. 

He liked you. You were sure of it now, when you thought back to how his eyes had balked at you so wonderfully, how careful and attentive he’d been. You were certain, and your heart smiled and you smiled and your hair was sprawled out on his sheets and for the first time, that desert wasteland in your head welcomed you and took you in, and you were right where you were supposed to be. 

Until your phone started buzzing. 

It was dancing across the sheets violently at someone's call and you peeked open one eye tiredly to pick it up. And when you did, the desert turned on you. Caught in a sandstorm, you held your phone between your fingers and felt your heart drop, lowered into the acid bath of your stomach.

It was Vernon.

Vernon, who was Seokmin’s best friend. Vernon, who was your brother. Vernon, who had always yelled at you to leave his room whenever he had Seokmin over. Vernon, who didn’t like when you talked to any guys at all, who had recruited his best friend to watch over you and take care of you. Vernon, whose best friend had just had his dick in your mouth. 

You heard the shower running distantly when you clicked accept, hoping to God that you didn’t look too disheveled. 

“Hi, N/n!” Vernon cheered immediately on the other end. His face popped up on your screen, a bright smile on his face. You smiled too - you missed your brother - but it was half faded, and Vernon noticed immediately. 

“Hi, Vern,” you said softly. His brows furrowed. “What’s wrong?” 

Of course, he could read you like a book. Of course, he knew that you were distant and nervous. You sighed heavily, trying desperately to collect yourself, to remember how you usually behaved, but for some reason, that you was far gone, and you had to be splayed on his screen, like a person replaced by something peregrine. 

“I’m a little stressed out,” you mumbled. “Got a lot of papers and stuff, that’s why I’m not home.” 

“Come home next break, okay? We miss you and you need to get out of that place every once in a while.” 

You nodded. 

Vernon’s eyes narrowed suddenly, and you saw him lean closer to the screen (which would have been funny, were you not suddenly wondering if there was leftover cum on your face). “Hey, where are you right now?” 

“My friend,” you said quickly - too quickly. “Her name’s Yunjin, we’re working together in chem.” 

Vernon hummed, seemingly content with your answer. “Your friend has the same bed sheets as Seokmin.” 

Shit, yeah, they facetimed every week, you remembered, cringing at yourself for not thinking of it earlier. You tried to play it cool, shrugging: “Weird.”

“Yeah, anyway-” 

Vernon rambled on and on about something or other, but you were unable to focus, watching the door to Seokmin’s room with a worried frown.

Moreover, you felt like a whore. Realistically, you hadn’t even lost your virginity. But sleeping with your brother’s best friend suddenly felt way more real now that you were talking to said brother, now that you were lying to his face, and you felt dirty and gross and you wished you could stand before Vernon, as the same baby sister that you had been before. But you weren’t. You were disgusting.

“Vernon, I gotta go,” you cut him off, and you hadn’t heard a word. Vernon’s excited expression dropped and he furrowed his brows. 

“Are you okay?” he asked, and you thanked the pixels for concealing at least a bit of the worry on his face. 

“Yeah, I just- I really need to get going,” you said. “Bye, Vernon!”

“By-” 

You disconnected the call and gathered your things, put your own clothes back on. Throwing Seokmin’s clothes onto his floor felt like shedding a second skin - a skin that had made you ugly and greedy and lustful. You only kept his boxers on, lumping the dress over your shoulders to drape over you in an unsightly and unorganized way. 

You spared a glance at the wrapped condom on his bedside table, long lost and forgotten by now. You could leave it. You could leave it and have a reason to come back, a reason to slip across that ledge again and fall into his arms and his mouth and his warmth. You almost did. Almost left it right there, where it begged to belong. But you snatched it off the counter, ignoring the way your heart clenched when you did, and slipped it into your tote bag. And you left, jumping across the border that separated you and back into your own wasteland. And it was so cold and so empty. You were alone again.

Seokmin came out of the shower, expecting to see you cuddled up in his bed, all soft and beautiful. But you weren’t there. Seokmin understood immediately. The condom was gone and so were you, only the perfume in his sheets remained, willing him to remember. And he cried. He sobbed into his own hands, because what had he done? 

You did not see each other the rest of that day. Or the next day. _____________________________

Seokmin wanted to let you disappear. He wanted you to slip away and he wanted to forget it had even happened - like a burning star dies out and leaves only a faint warmth behind, lasting years. But he couldn’t. He couldn’t let you go, couldn’t bear knowing he’d never hold you in his arms again, never see you laugh again, never see you cum again. And he couldn’t bear knowing that maybe he’d read it wrong; maybe he’d made you uncomfortable, maybe you’d felt obligated. 

So he texted you. For two days his texts came in sporadically and unsuccessfully. Questioning and pleading, he wanted to know it wasn’t true. 

Lee Seokmin: why’d you leave? 

Lee Seokmin: can we talk??

Lee Seokmin: i miss u

Lee Seokmin: i need to know i didnt hurt you

Lee Seokmin: can you please answer? 

Each text came more painful than the last. Each text came more pleading. You sat alone in your room, in the dark, having only his one sided chats to light up your tear-streaked face. 

Eventually they stopped coming. You thought they would. You thought, you knew, eventually he’d give up. But what hurt the most was knowing he wanted you too; knowing he liked you as much as you liked him. You’d seen it in his eyes, when his hand slipped between your legs, and you’d seen it when he came staring down at you.

But you preferred to remember Seokmin for how he was.

How he was small and young, how he had a swanky bowlcut and how he looked in his school uniform. How he and your big brother, Vernon, had bonded and watched movies together in your living room, and the countless dinners he’d stayed over for, always so respectful to your parents and you. You preferred to remember when he didn’t love you back. 

The pain that had been tethered to your youth and to him, back when he was unreachable, just a figure you could marvel at, was so much duller compared to this pain, the one pulsed in your heart now: the pain of him loving you back, but still being off-limits. Something that could be, but was destined to die out. And it did, when he stopped texting you, you felt that unborn child’s soul leave your own. Alone again.

And then suddenly, you weren’t. 

A stern knock on your door. You flinched at the sound, fearing the worst. You were in your bed, in your sweatpants and your sweater and that condom was on the bedside table, watching the door with you. 

Another knock.

“Y/n, I know you’re in there!” 

Seokmin. Of course, it was Seokmin. No one else would come for you. But it was all too painful. You feared the worst - feared that seeing him, you would collapse into him again, and that this time you wouldn’t be able to find your way back. 

“Open the door, Y/n,” his voice was serious.

“Go away, Seokmin!” you yelled, voice breaking halfway. 

A pause. When Seokmin spoke again, he was not angry anymore; he was vulnerable.

“Y/n. I-I know you don’t want to talk to me, but-” he paused, wincing at himself and you knew there was tears in his eyes. “But I need to know that I didn’t make you uncomfortable.” 

You thought that you could handle the self-blame Seokmin omitted - maybe that’s just because it was words on a screen. But hearing him crying outside your door, and how real he was when his hand knocked vigorously, it tore down each and every one of your last defenses. 

“I need- I need to hear that you’re okay and that I-” 

“I’m opening the door,” you interrupted him, and sure enough you padded to the door and swiftly unlocked it. 

And then you were standing before one another. It was like time stopped, how the air stilled around you, and how the world quieted down. He was all crumpled paper hearts, all deflated and broken, and his hair was messy and his eyes were dark, but they sparkled again, just at the sight of you, and yours at him. 

“It’s not your fault,” you whispered, breaking the enchantment cast upon you. The real world came crashing down, the people in the streets and birds in the trees and wind coursing through the leaves. The light that you’d shut out with a firm tug to the curtains was dancing on your linoleum floor. “It’s my fault. It’s- I talked to Vernon and I- I feel like shit, Seokmin. I feel like a slut.” 

“You’re a virgin!” Seokmin scoffed, but it did nothing to calm you. 

“It felt wrong! Because I- because you’re Vernon’s friend. Because Vernon never likes when I date guys, and because now I’ve been fooling around with his best friend,” you defended yourself, biting your lip when tears stung your eyes. Seokmin softened. “I just felt guilty. And gross.” 

“You’re not gross, you’re in love,” he said softly, and your eyes locked. Everything about him was pleading - he was just short of literally falling to his knees, begging for you to hear him out. “And- and with me, of all people!” 

“Seokmin-” 

“And I’m in love with you too,” his voice was an urgent whisper, not daring to let you speak again, to let you try and steer him away. 

“Of all people,” you mumbled, a small smile finding your lips. Seokmin smiled too. 

“So.. I’m tired of hearing you talk about yourself like this. I’m tired of Vernon being the one keeping us apart. I want- I want you to know that Vernon would understand.”

You shook your head dismissively. He wouldn’t. 

“I know him too! You know? Maybe better than you,” he pouted a little, and it made you laugh, and everything was becoming lighter, and for better or worse you really did want to jump into his arms again. “He shouldn’t be the thing stopping you from dating me- or- or anyone, really. But especially me.” 

You giggled again, and Seokmin’s heart palpitated in his chest at that sound - and at being the source of it. Then the laughter trailed off and your smile tightened and your heart tightened: “I just don’t want to sneak around-” 

“Okay! Say no more!” Seokmin interrupted, hand held out as if to calm a mighty beast. He casually pulled out his phone, tongue in his cheek, as he called your brother. Vernon.

It rang for a few seconds, put on speaker. You couldn’t help the nervousness. Couldn’t help the pinch in your nerves, building up from your stomach and into your heart. Then he answered. 

“Hey, dude, what’s up?” Vernon’s voice glitched on the other end of the line, utterly oblivious (as always). Seokmin spoke, hand on his hip: “Hey, just curious, how would you feel if me and your sister started dating?” 

There was a moment of silence. On Vernon’s end, you imagined it was simply puzzled, but on your end, you stood with your heart all big and floaty, like a balloon in your hand, waiting for him to say that he’d hate it, that he’d kill him, and pop your heart with a simple word to prick. That wasn’t what he said though. Vernon said:

“I mean, yeah, man, I’d prefer you over any of those other college douchebags. I at least know you’d take care of her for real, man, not like that Jeonghan guy you were going on about.” 

Your heart balloon took off, and the boundary between you and Seokmin filled itself with sand. Had it been imaginary? This whole time? You couldn’t help the wheeze you left you, overwhelmed with relief and joy. 

“I know, man, Jeonghan’s the worst,” Seokmin said casually, but he was grinning from ear to ear at your reaction. You’d buckled over in silent laughter, unable to contain the glee. It seemed to dramatic now 

“The worst,” Vernon repeated. Then he pursed his lips and spoke again: “So you’re dating my sister?” 

“Uh, you know, I think we’re making it official in a second, yeah,” Seokmin said and even Vernon could hear the smile in his voice. 

“Cool, man, yeah, I kind of figured, she facetimed me with your ugly ass bed sheets in the background, and I thought, no way, a girl would buy those bed sheets.” 

“Lay off my sheets, man.” 

Both of the men laughed and you did too, crying laughing and covering your mouth to contain. Your chest was fluttering with butterflies and light and love.

“Hey, man, for real, if you hurt her, I know where you live, bro,” Vernon was suddenly serious. 

“I wouldn’t dream of it, man,” Seokmin responded, equally as serious now. He eyed you, then spoke into the phone again: “Hey, I gotta go make sweet love to your sister.” 

“Ew, dude, don’t say tha-” 

And the phone was hung up and Seokmin was laughing with you, eyes crescent and smile wide and toothy, and cheeks all red and shiny, he doubled over and took your hands in his. “I told you, didn’t I?” 

“Shut up, Lee,” you said, pulling him by the hand and letting him kiss you. Letting yourself kiss him. Letting yourself back into his arms, and this time Seokmin had crossed the border, and had fallen into you, and you stood there together and you were in love. 

So, so in love, your lips entangled and danced together, and your hands dragged up the back of his neck and his up your waist. 

And you realized, his tongue in your mouth, this was how you preferred to remember Seokmin; completely and utterly in love with you, and dancing with you in your room, and smiling into the kiss, and hands running up your body. You preferred to remember him as yours, and yourself as his. 

Seokmin guided you to your bed, pulling your body into his lap. Then he pulled away, completely out of breath, and smiling at you like a twinkling star. 

“Think we can finally break open that condom now?” 

“Fuck yes,” you said.

And then you did.

movie | lee seokmin x reader | 529 w.

"Did you ransack the convenience store?" you ask upon seeing Seokmin with a bunch of snacks in his long arms.

"First off, that's not nice, and a little help please?" he demands. You laugh a little before making your way across the room to take some of the snacks from his arms. He must have forgotten the shopping bag again, but that doesn't seem to stop him from getting all of these snacks.

After setting everything on the coffee table in the living room, Seokmin flopped down on the couch, huffing.

"So, what are we watching?" he asked, leaning forward to grab one bag of chips. Both of you had promised to spend the weekend doing a movie marathon. Ever the gentleman, he lets you choose your favorite. But somehow, that makes you very nervous. What if he didn't like your movie pick? What if he finds it boring?

"Howl's Moving Castle," you uttered. You know it's a very well-known movie from Ghibli Studios, but Seokmin claimed he had never seen any of them. On the other hand, these movies have become somewhat of a religion for you since you first laid eyes on them.

After pressing play, you leaned back on the sofa, feeling Seokmin arms on the back of your neck. He leaves a small kiss in your temple before leaning back with you.

"Woah!" he exclaims when the first scene comes into the TV. "That's so beautiful."

If you're being honest, this is the first time Howl's Moving Castle become a background noise. You're too immersed in watching Seokmin at every scene. In awe of his pure reaction, and those round eyes reflecting the pretty light of the movie.

"Woah? That was so good?" he pointed out. "Why have I never watched it before?" he asks, more to himself than you.

"Do you like it?" you ask back. Earning a look of disbelief from Seokmin.

"Are you kidding? I love it!" he exclaims. "It's so beautiful and the music is so soothing. I understand why's this your favorite movie, sweetheart."

"Good, good," you murmured, pleased by his answer. "But I actually like it because Howl is so handsome," you teased. Seokmin lets out a sarcastic laugh before cupping your face.

"Hey, let's not lie now, you keep glancing at me throughout the whole movie," he paused, pressing a chaste kiss on your pouting lips. "you think I wouldn't notice?" he quips back, making you roll your eyes in annoyance while suppressing a grin.

You break free from his grip, reaching to the remote as you say, "Fine, now onto the next Ghibli movies."

"Is the male main character even more handsome?" he sassed.

"They're all good-looking actually, but none of them are real, so..." you responded, leaning back to your initial position, snuggling closer to Seokmin who was laughing at your answer.

"What's that the thing Howl said..." he recalled. "いいコだ?"

"You're cheesy," you said, Shaking your head in embarrassment. Hiding the fact that you're blushing.

"You love that," was his only response. Even when you can't see him, you know he has that smug smile plastered all over his face.

Indeed, you do love that.

a/n. i hope Seokmin has actually watched Howl's Moving Castle at least once?

いいコだ = that's my girl (aka every hopeless romantic's favorite line)

Here Are The Keys - Lee Seokmin

Synopsis: Your boyfriend, Seokmin, was known to be the perfect gentleman. He took extra care of you as if you were the most fragile thing in existence. And in the bedroom? He was always prepared to have you see the stars.

Pairing: Lee Seokmin x fem reader

Genre: Smutttttt baby - MINORS DNI, established relationship,

Contains: fingering (f. receiving), somewhat public play, dirty talk, slight degradation (name calling), nudity, oral (f. receiving), unprotected intercourse, female orgasm (squirting), male orgasm (does not pull out)

Word Count: 3.8k

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You held onto Seokmin's arms as you walked through the front door of the apartment building you two lived in. You two recently took the leap in getting an apartment together. All the boxes have been unpacked and all the extra furniture you had to order was put together, thanks to the other guys coming in to chip in. They were almost as excited for the two of you and this new chapter, so they were more than willing to lend a helping hand.

The place finally felt like it was yours. No longer were you trying to sort things and living out of boxes as you adjusted to the new chapter of your lives. Seokmin decided the occasion required a proper celebration. You two went out to eat at a restaurant in your new neighborhood before settling into your new home.

Your heels clicked against the floor of the apartment building's lobby. The sound of you made Seokmin's ego rise. You were his. He just wanted to show you off to everyone.

He led you two over to the elevator, so you could go up to your apartment. He pressed the 'up' button before resting his hand on top of yours which rested on his bicep. You peered up at him, a smile on your lips which made Seokmin smile even brighter. "How did I get so lucky?" He questioned softly. You shrugged which caused him to laugh, placing a gentle kiss at the top of your head.

A ding soon let out, indicating the elevator had arrived. Seokmin stepped back, allowing you in first. You were about to make room for anyone else who might be joining the two of you.

Before anyone could slip in, Seokmin jumped in and clicked the 'close door' button. To his satisfaction, the doors closed behind. He smirked seeing your shocked expression. "Looks like it is just the two of us."

You couldn't help but giggle as you felt a rush of adrenaline take over your body. He walked up to you as the elevator began to travel up. Your back was pressed against the wall of the elevator. Seokmin was standing right in front of you. One of his hand moved to rest right by your head, the other moving to hold your hip. He pressed his forehead against yours as he gazed into your eyes. You could practically melt underneath his gaze. And he loved having that effect on you.

"I've been waiting to get you alone since the moment you walked out in that little black dress." "Then what are you waiting for?"

He quirked an eyebrow, looking down at you. Seokmin never took you to be the type of woman into public play. You just composed yourself with such grace. He loved discovering new sides of you.

Keeping his posture, so he hovered over you, he removed the hand resting against the wall of the elevator. He moved it in between your bodies, gently running his fingertips across your exposed thighs. Naturally, you parted your legs for him, inviting him to do as he pleased. Seokmin groaned at the sight.

With the green light you gave him, his fingers slid underneath your dress. His fingers were expecting to brush against the material of your panties, but he was instantly in contact with your warm, wet pussy. He groaned louder this time, pressing his lips into the side of your face in appreciation. "You really know the way into my heart, sweet girl. Risky to go without panties tonight, especially out to that fancy restaurant, but god. I can't be mad at you."

Your arms wrapped around his neck, holding yourself close to him. You giggled as you buried yourself into his neck. Seokmin didn't waste anytime. His fingers slid into your pussy where he began scissoring your pussy, stretching you out for preparation once he truly gets you alone. The adrenaline of potentially getting caught fueled the both of you. You let out soft whimpers and moans. He pumped his fingers quickly, the sound of skin hitting skin and your wet pussy filling the small interior. It made your cheeks turn bright red as his ego soared.

You heard a small ding in the midst of Seokmin worshipping your pussy. Seokmin gently removed his fingers from your pussy despite your disapproval. Yet, you ended up being grateful when you saw the elevator doors open to reveal someone stepping in.

Seeing that you were on your floor, Seokmin grabbed your hand with his free one. He nodded politely at the gentleman who was seeking to head down to the lobby while you two slipped out. You could have sworn the guy could smell your wet pussy from the way his nose scrunched up. Your cheeks turned bright red.

However, they felt hotter when you looked in front of you to see Seokmin stuck his hand, the one coated in your pussy juices, in his mouth. If he had things his way, he would show off his hand to the world of how quickly he can make you crumble. But you were his, only for his eyes.

For now, he would just savor the taste of your sweet pussy.

You squeezed his hand affectionately, letting your free hand rest on his bicep. There was nothing you took more pride in than being Lee Seokmin's girl. And he was just as prideful to be yours. "Okay, angel, I think it's time to really make this place ours. What do you say?" The tone of his voice sent shivers down your spine. He spoke so gently yet with so much passion behind his words. He knew all the right ways to make you feel weak in the best way.

All you could do was nod your head, pressing a lingering kiss to his sharp jawline. Seokmin smirked as he used his hand not holding yours to pull out his keys.

Once the door was pushed open, you felt Seokmin scooped you up in your arms. You let out a squeal as your own are wrapped around Seokmin's neck. He chuckled at your reaction before walking in, his eyes never leaving yours and kicking the door closed with his foot.

"Sweetheart," he called out. His voice made your stomach feel all warm and tingly. "Can you reach and lock the door for me? Kind of got my hands full."

You couldn't help but giggle but nodded your head. One of your arms stayed around his neck, playing with the hairs at the back of his head. Your free arm moved down to lock the bottom and top lock of your unit door.

Living with Seokmin has always been something you dreamed of. While, of course, you love spending time at the dorms and you were sure that you wouldn't stop going over, you really were excited for this new chapter. You adored all of the members, but it was nice that you could now be intimate with your boyfriend without worry of being interrupted.

"Where should I start with you? Hmm? Should I get a taste of your pussy? We did skip out on dessert," Seokmin began. "Or do you want my cock to pound into you until you see the stars?"

You looked up at Seokmin as if he were made out of stars himself. Seokmin was carrying you into your new bedroom. You at first were eager to cuddle up next to him, to be wrapped up in his arms and be able to enjoy some peace and quiet.

Now, there was nothing more you wanted than to have the two of you moaning. What a great way to introduce yourself to your new neighbors.

"I think what I really want is to feel so close to you, to feel your cock stretching me out and screaming your name." "Damn right. You're going to scream my name so loud everyone in this building knows you're my girl, my pretty little slut. That's what you want, right?"

You shivered at the thought before nodding in response. You felt so small, so submissive even just underneath his gaze. And you wouldn't want it any other way.

Seokmin dropped you onto the bed, but made sure you landed safely. The dress you were wearing moved up towards your upper thigh, almost exposing all of you to him. As much as he wanted you right then and there, he also wanted to take your time with you.

"Get comfortable, darlin'. You've got a long night ahead of you."

Quickly, you leaned up slightly to slip the dress off of body. You were grateful that it was a rather easy dress to take on and off. Feeling the cool air of the room, your nipples easily hardened. There was no way you and Seokmin were in the mood to wait any longer. You squeezed your legs together in anticipation.

Seokmin also got busy unbuttoning the tops of his shirt. You were nearly drooling at the sight of his own bare chest becoming more exposed to you. It was as if he was crafted by the gods, and somehow, he was all yours.

"As much as I loved feeling your pussy earlier, I want a real taste. Is that okay with you, angel? Do you want my tongue to run up and down your pussy until you're squirming?" "Please, baby. Just do something to me," you whined out.

He cooed slightly at the desperate tone in your voice. He leaned forward to kiss a line of kisses starting from the valley of your breasts. In response, your fingers ran through his hair and gripped it gently. He hummed in satisfaction as his lips moved down your torso towards your pelvic bone.

Slowly, Seokmin sunk onto his knees in front of you. You propped yourself on your elbows as he increasingly became out of reach, not wanting to lose sight of him. His hands rested on your thighs. He looked up at you, winking.

Without having to be asked, you spread your legs for you. Seokmin let out a throaty groan, appreciating how your body reacted to him. He felt his cock twitch in his pants at the sight of how wet you were. You were literally glistening.

"So beautiful," he whispered. His lips this time leaned forward to press along your right inner thigh and trailed towards where you craved him most. You could feel his breath against your skin, inching towards your pussy, which made you shiver with excitement.

"Be patient, darlin. I'm not going anywhere." "I just can't help it, baby. I love how good you make me feel," you whimpered.

Seokmin's ego grew from your statement. To show his appreciation, he let his tongue flatten immediately against your pussy. No more teasing. Not when you were being such a good girl for him already.

You gasped at the feeling, moving to allow your legs to rest on his shoulders from his crotched position. Seokmin smirked against you, allowing his tongue to trail from the bottom of your pussy all the way to your clit. Sensing the way your breathing hitched and back arched, he knew your clit was your weakest spot.

He adored the way your back arched with ease, how your head rolled back against the pillows at the head out the bed. He could feel your leg muscles flexing slightly as the pleasure was running through your body. Seokmin wanted to be the only one who made you feel this way.

You've always been the one to look after Seokmin before yourself. Whether it was to cook him a warm dinner or greet him with kisses, you always made sure he was taken care of in some regard. It was why you typically offered to give him oral before he could offer.

Not tonight. Tonight was going to be all about you and this new chapter you. There was never going to be a day where you felt like this relationship was one-sided, not when you two were living under the same roof now. His love for you would always be evident, whether it be through little things he does for you or to you.

His tongue circled your clit, pushing the bundle of nerves around in his mouth. He let out a groan which sent vibrations throughout your entire body, causing you to whimper loudly. Music to his ears. One of his hands resting on your thigh, squeezing the plush skin affectionately. His other hand moved to hold your hips down, keeping you in place.

His tongue then began to move down to slip into your pussy. It only made him groan more. He was able to get a sweeter taste of you, to feel how warm you were against his tongue. He was addicted to the feeling, truthfully. And if this was how he perishes, he would die a happy man for sure.

"S-Seokmin," you called out to him.

The sight of him nearly made you orgasm right then and there. He peered up at you with those piercing brown eyes. His eyes were blown out with lust. His lips and chin were covered in your juices.

"Yes, my love?" "Can you please make love to me?"

He didn't need to be told twice. He leaned down, however, to place one last kiss on your clit. It caused you to shiver yet he couldn't help but chuckle at your reaction. You were just too damn adorable. Seokmin wasn't sure how someone could be so seductive yet so adorable at the same time.

Before he moved up, he helped ease your legs off his shoulders. Each leg received kisses around your knee and then trailing up to your thigh as he laid them to rest on the comforter. He continued to kiss up your body - around your hips, your stomach, your chest. Seokmin made sure to pay extra attention to your breasts where he kissed, sucked, and bit down where he could. Anywhere to leave marks of his undying love for you.

At the same time, his hands got to work at disregarding the belt around his pants, the buttons of said pants, and his boxers. All had joined your dress on the floor.

Soon, he had crawled his way up so he was hovering over you. You were able to *finally* wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him down to you. His eyes widened in surprise at the sudden movement, but couldn't help but smirk also. Whenever the two of you got intimate, you always just craved physical touch.

Your fingers were getting tangled in his hair, twirling the locks gently. You also couldn't miss the opportunity to plant kisses along the side of his face, which left him feeling a bit flustered. The feeling of your bare chest against his didn't help either as it sent his mind into a whirlwind.

"How did I get so lucky?" He asked softly.

Before you could come up with a witty response, you gasped softly at the feeling of Seokmin's tip against your pussy. Knowing your request, he didn't want to waste any more time. Yet, he also was ready to go at whatever pace was suitable for you.

"I ask myself the same thing every day," you confessed in a hushed tone.

No further words needed to be exchanged. The way you were looking up at him solidified that you felt the same way as he did. You two were made out of the same material, the same soul. You were destined to be with each other.

One of his hands moved down to grasp his cock, ensuring that he was positioning at the right angle so he could slide it with ease. He never wanted to cause you any sort of discomfort. Once satisfied, his hands moved so one propped himself up, the other holing your hand. The gesture was enough to make your heart race yet body melt into the sheets beneath you with ease.

"Ready, angel?" "Please, baby boy."

With the one thrust, the two of you were sent into a chorus of moans. Your hearts were racing with the love, the passion you two had for one another.

He squeezed your hand every now and then, just to remind you that he adored you. To him, sex was just one of the ways he can show his love for you. But at the moment, he also was too consumed by the feeling of your warm pussy hugging his cock.

Seokmin wanted to shower you with praises and remind you of how gorgeous you were in every sense. Instead, groans and moans were leaving his lips without resistance. His hips were maintaining momentum even if his brain was short-circuiting.

He thrusted deep into you, wanting you to feel every vein and the curve of his cock pressing against your walls. You felt so full - both from his love and the feeling of his cock stretching you out. Your head was rolling back against the pillows, whimpering out nonsense as you were overwhelmed by the feeling.

"Yeah? This feel good, angel? Come on, talk to me."

You let out a shaky breath as you were trying to find the right words to say. Words were floating around your mind - amazing, speechless, heavenly. Yet, you couldn't pin them down as the wet sounds of your pussy and skin smacking against skin pounced the walls.

Seokmin chuckled endearingly before he leaned down, pressing kisses along the side of your face. Your eyes fluttered shut as you just let the sensations take over your body.

"You look so pretty like this, y/n, baby," he breathed out. The puff of air and his lips grazing against your skin caused goosebumps to rise on your skin. "With your eyes shut, your chest rising and falling. All because of me. Will always be because of me," he vowed.

Slowly, you fluttered your eyes open to look up at the love of your life. Soft moans were leaving your lips as his cock went deeper, went harder into you. You've never had such a deep connection with someone before.

Your one hand moved to rest on his arm, gripping his bicep. The other hand moved up to tuck the strands of hair that were beginning to lay flat against his forehead due to the sweat. Your fingers gently pushed the straps back, moving through his soft hair until your hand rested on the back of his head. "I'm so in love with you," you breathed out.

Seokmin nearly melted at the gesture and your words. It is no lie that Seokmin was a rather affectionate person, but hearing you say that you didn't love him ut were in love with him? He was putty in your hands. You were his person in this life. And he was convinced that in every universe, you two found your way towards one another.

"I love you today," he began, his thrusts following after his sentence.

"I love you tomorrow." This time, his thrust was a little harder.

"And I'll love you always." This thrust in particular curved right into your g-spot, sending you into a frenzy of whimpers and moans. Your fingernails dug into his biceps which caused him to smirk deeply.

The bed was squeaking slightly, you two were moaning just to each other. Your love for one another was not for show, just for you two which made the room feel so intense. Under his gaze, you turned into a puddle. Literally. You got wetter the more he gazed down at you with his piercing brown eyes.

"I-I don't know how much longer I can last," you confessed. Your stomach was being a fire pit, the band within you getting tighter and tighter. You could burst at any moment.

Seokmin was in the same situation. He was trying his best to delay his own orgasm. He could feel the way his cock twitched erratically within you. But this wasn't just about him. Tonight, this was about you and your relationship.

"I know, sweet girl. Whenever you're ready, I'm right there with you," he promised.

His thrusts Neve slowed down. If anything, they sped up to help you reach your orgasm. If there was one thing about Seokmin, he was determined to give you the very best this life could offer, always providing his best. He would do anything for you.

His cock was driving right into your g-spot continuously. After one particular thrust, you lost it. The band in you snapped and you let out a soft cry in pleasure. Your vision went white, mind went blank - squirting slightly on the bedsheets and on Seokmin's thighs.

That was enough for Seokmin. A low growl ripped through his throat as his hands were planted on your hips, keeping you close to him. He thrusted his hops one more time to ensure all of his cock was buried inside you as hot spurts of his cum painted your walls. His head rolled back slightly as his body relaxed at the feeling of his high.

You breathed out shakily at the feeling of just how full you were. Your body trembling underneath him as you began to come down from your own high. "Seokmin?" you called out softly.

That was enough for Seokmin to be brought down to reality. His eyes landed down on you, seeing the soft gaze on your face. And he knew just what you needed.

"Don't even got to ask, angel," he whispered.

His lips pressed against yours gently as he began to slip out of you. You whimpered softly at the loss of feeling him so close, but soon relaxed as his arms wrapped around you. He pushed back the comforter so he could slip the two of you underneath the warmth of blankets.

Seokmin pulled back just a bit to ensure you were comfortable underneath the sheets. His arms loosely wrapped around you, allowing you to shift as needed to get into a comfortable position. Once you were settled, his arms tightened slightly around you to pull you in closer.

Your head nuzzled into his neck, pressing a gentle kiss. Seokmin was grateful you decided to cuddle up into him, so you didn't witness how his cheeks flushed at the display of affectionate.

"I can't believe I get to end my nights like this now," you whispered. Your voice was softer, your body a bit limp. He knew you were starting to get tired, and he couldn't blame you. You two spent the day unpacking before going out for a dinner date. It's been practically nonstop until this moment.

"I can," Seokmin confessed in a hushed tone. One of his hands rested on your spine, fingertips running up and down slowly. His other hand tucked strands of hair behind your ear. "I always wanted this for us, to have our own space where we can grow and love each other."

Now it was your turn to blush.

Your arms had wrapped around Seokmin's torso, keeping you close to him. Not like he had any plans of letting you go anytime soon. You began to fall asleep to the sound of his soft breathing and his heart beating. It helped that he was also swearing your favorite cologne of his.

"Goodnight, baby," you whispered. "Goodnight, princess. Same time tomorrow?" he asked teasingly.

Ok so this photo has me thinking… how would we all feel about Soccer Star!SVT plots? Like especially DK?? Wowowowow

Update: did turn this into a small fic! which you can read HERE please let me know if I should continue, add other members, etc.

ok yeah so this is happening.. 😏 COMING SOON

Ok so this photo has me thinking… how would we all feel about Soccer Star!SVT plots? Like especially DK?? Wowowowow

Game-Winning Goal - Lee Seokmin

Synopsis: Your college's soccer team was competing to secure a spot in playoffs - the first time in the history of the program. Everyone cheered for him, and it felt like sometimes your voice got lost in the crowd. However, each time he took the field, he prayed you were in the stands just for him.

Pairing: Soccer Captain!Lee Seokmin x fem. reader

Genre: Angst - jealous reader, classmates to lovers

Word Count: 2.4k

Got inspired by the very picture posted on Weverse a few days ago hehe hope you enjoy it!

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Everyone was standing at attention underneath the lights of your university's soccer stadium. You wondered how many students knew even about the stadium up until a few weeks ago.

Like other universities, students rallied around the sports teams that were doing good. Soccer was one of the very few people rarely talked about. At least, that was the case up to last month. The soccer team, led by Lee Seokmin, has picked up momentum and have been making strides. That includes that for the first time in the program's history, they had the chance to potentially secure a spot in the playoffs.

All the boys were eager to see the stands filled up. The game even sold out on tickets, something that also never happened. Most of the time, the boys had to beg friends to come and support them. It was nice to see people were genuinely excited, but that only increased the pressure to perform well.

There were 7 minutes left in the match. The score was 2-1, the opposing team.

Your eyes were locked on Lee Seokmin, the captain but also a friend of yours. To be honest, you weren't sure what to classify him as.

You've always been aware of who Lee Seokmin was. The two of you met at freshman orientation. You still remember how his face lit up with excitement when he announced he was on the soccer team during an ice-breaker. He thought he would be one of those faces you see walk around campus and have the vague memory of.

It wouldn't be until junior year when you two were placed in the same writing seminar that your paths would cross again. You thought he wouldn't have recognized you from two years ago, but you were mistaken. Seeing a familiar face gave Seokmin the perfect excuse to come sit next to you in the lecture hall. And then again as a way to work together for peer-editing, or at least that's what he claimed.

The peer-editing sessions led to you two exchange numbers, but it still wasn't enough for Seokmin. Sure, he enjoyed getting to hangout with you outside of the classroom but it was always for classwork. He craved more which led to him asking you out.

Due to the practice and traveling schedules of the team, you only have gone on three dates so far. Each date was wonderful, of course. Seokmin was the definition of a gentleman. It was easy to be ever about the potential of what you could be.

His teammates knew who you were. You were the girl who made their captain happy. While they never asked for specifics when it came to the two of you, they were just content to see Seokmin enjoying life. You showed up for the games, often lingering around afterward to congratulate the guys and Seokmin on their victory. It was easy to win their support when you showed interest in the sport that bonded them all together.

You couldn't deny your bubbling jealousy as girls around you screamed for him. He was yours. You've been the one seeing him off the field the last few weeks. However, the rest of the student body wasn't aware of that fact just yet. Or at least, you were hoping one day to make things official with him.

"Have you seen the captain?" "Oh you mean Seokmin? Yeah! He's so tall and dreamy." "The definition of tall, tan, and handsome."

A chorus of giggles erupted around you in agreement. Your heart twitched as you wanted so badly to snap at them. Yet, that wasn't your place a tall. You guys were not even official.

"He just is so hot. I bet he's great in bed." "I mean, he's got to have good hand eye coordination."

Give me a break.

"Okay guys, we cannot leave any up to chance," Seokmin spoke to his teammates. They were all gathered in a quick huddle as the opposing team called a timeout. The perfect opportunity to strategize to make the game-winning play.

Not only did Seokmin feel pressure to get the team to playoffs, but he knew you were somewhere in the stands watching him. You've been to a few games throughout the season, but this was the first game you were in attendance as the girl he was seeing.

He felt like everything he worked for, one and off the field, depending on the outcome of this game.

"Jeonghan and Mingyu, you need to make sure you are blocking their defensive. I can kick the ball to Seungkwan who then can kick it to Jihoon," he described.

Instead of going on dates with you, he has been studying playbooks and videotapes from previous games. He has sacrificed investing time with you because his team needed him at the moment. Everyone was looking at him to make quick decisions, and to be dependable.

It honestly made him feel guilty because he wanted to spend time with you. Yet, you were so understanding. You encouraged him to put his all into the game.

He just knew he couldn't disappoint you.

All the boys exchanged looks with each other, nonverbally saying they like the plan and are ready to defend each other. They were hungry to win.

"Let's go win this thing, boys," Seungcheol called out.

The referee blew the whistle, signaling that timeout was over and the game needed to resume. It filled Seokmin's chest when he heard the roar of the crowd, as Woozi took the play to the corner to throw the ball in. What made Seokmin's heart rattle was the fact your voice was mixed in the crowd. He just knew you had to be out there, watching him.

And there was no other place you wanted to be. It was a crisp evening once the sun had set. You were wearing a leather jacket, leg bouncing a bit uncontrollable. You were undoubtedly nervous for all the boys, but mainly for Seokmin. He just deserved all the good that this world had to offer.

All eyes were on the soccer ball that Woozi threw in. The stadium roared with excitement as Jeonghan and one of the opponent players tried maneuvering the ball in their respective team's favor. The cheers got louder once Seokmin's team took the advantage of the ball.

You felt like you couldn't breathe. You were nervous and excited, hopeful.

Even being in the stands, you could see the sweat starting to drip down Seokmin's face and neck. Strands of his hair were starting to stick to his forehead. He was giving his all to the game right now. You couldn't be anymore proud.

Jeonghan kicked the ball to Seungkwan. However, he was beginning to be cornered by the defense. He kicked the ball to Seokmin which suddenly made everyone cheer louder.

You suddenly thought back to the eager freshman boy you met the summer before college. You wondered if he ever believed he would make it to this moment - where everything seems to be falling into place. He wore a sly smirk as he kicked the ball back and forth, tricking and even frustrating the opponent in front of him. Seokmin then kicked the ball over to Seungcheol behind him who began running towards the end goal.

This was it. The final minutes.

Seungcheol looked like he was about to attempt to score. He had a good angle, but just had to weave through some defensive players who were determined to stop him.

Seokmin jogged up behind, ready to assist. And it was a good thing he did because one of the opponents kicked the ball away from Seungcheol right underneath him, popping the ball away. "Shit," he murmured.

Never before has Seokmin run so fast. He knew if they lost possession of the ball the game would be over. And that was something he was not counting on happening. Not when they were so close to securing a spot in playoffs.

Seungkwan managed to get the ball away from the opponents which made Seokmin smirk. Good. The ball was kicked back towards Seokmin. This was all on him. He stopped the ball fro rolling with his foot.

Quickly, his eyes scanned all his options. All his teammates were being blocked by defensive players. He had no choice but to kick it. If he tried running with the ball again, he could very easily lose possession. It would be a tight kick to get it in the net, but Seokmin was determined. The crowd was screaming at Seokmin to kick it, to just try.

He was the only hope.

From the corner of his eye, he noticed the other team was trying to calculate his next move. They were basically ready to pounce on him. He had to kick now or forever would regret it.

Narrowing his eyes on the goal net, he tried analyzing quickly which would be the best pocket to aim for. Their goalie was crotched down. He could aim low, making the goalie believe he had to jump for it. It was a risk. It just didn't help that Seokmin was at a tighter angle away from the net than he'd prefer, but he had to try. If not for himself, for his team and for you.

Time froze as Seokmin moved his leg back. He kicked the ball with all his might. The roar of the crowd died down to him as all eyes were locked on the ball, anticipating it to be caught by the net and not the hands of the goalie.

You held your breath, praying to the heavens that everything Seokmin had worked for would finally prove worth it.

CLINK

Your eyes widened as the ball hit off the goal post, going over the heads of several players. The fans of the visiting team broke out into cheers as their team was able to claim possession of the ball.

Groans were surrounding you as people quickly began to gather their belongings. The game was over. You felt your heart shatter as you could see the look of disappointment wash over the face of players for your school's team. You then quickly looked at Seokmin.

Your whole world shattered even more when you saw the rears in his eyes. Almost as if it was in slow motion, he fell down to his knees. The referee blew the whistle, signaling the end of the game. The opposing team cheered, ecstatic that they clinched a spot. Your team, your boys, all lowered their heads. A few of them went over to Seokmin to check on him.

You too gathered your own belongings. You couldn't stay here.

People began climbing the stands to exit the sports arena, whereas you pushed your way down to get to where the turf met the bleachers. A few people looked at you, confused as to why you'd want to make your way onto the field especially since the season was over. It was the only place you wanted to be.

Seokmin slowly got up, but he couldn't bring his feet to walk off the pitch. He had given everything and then some for this team, for the game. As captain, he felt as if he had let everyone down especially the seniors who now just played in their final game. It wasn't the outcome they all hoped for.

And to make things worse, he saw the floods of his fellow classmates leaving the stadium. He wasn't surprised if you left with them. God, why would you even want to be with him now that he was the sole reason why the team's season was over.

"Seokmin!"

His head picked up, confused. It wasn't an angry voice as he was anticipated. He was convinced he was going to be on everyone's shit list until the end of the school year.

He didn't even have time to process who had called out as the voice was distant at first. All he felt was arms wrap around his torso, nearly knocking him over. Yet, his feet were glued to the turf. Maybe because hew as in denial that the game was actually over? Or that once he walks off, the season was truly over.

The only thing that brought him back to reality was when he looked down to see it was you. His arms instantly wrapped around you yet his eyes were wide as the moon. You didn't care how sweaty he was. You even tightened your hold on him.

"Y/n? Why are you still here?" His voice was soft, almost broken. Were you about to end things right here with them all because of the game? "Coming down to tell you how proud I am of you."

Proud? Why? Did you even watch the same game?

Yet, he didn't have the strength to question your intentions. His eyes swelled with tears as he buried his face into your shoulder. He squeezed your body delicately yet held you closely as if he was afraid you were going to float away from him.

The scent of your perfume has always been a comfort to him. Whether it be he was stressing over a paper, or that he was trying to relax after a game - you were a comfort to him. He squeezed your body again, hoping that with as non-communicative as he was being in the moment, you could feel how much he appreciated you just being here with them. He was speechless that you didn't give up hope on him, even if he let everyone down including himself.

"You did everything you could, put your whole heart out in the field tonight," you whispered into his ear. His eyes fluttered shut at the feeling of both your warm body against his own, and the way your fingers were currently driving through his hair. It was as if you knew exactly what he needed without him having to ask.

"No, y/n, sweetie. My heart was in the stands tonight."

He pulled back and you could see the tears both in his eyes and staining his cheeks. However, he wore a gentle smile. You smiled gently up at him as you kept one arm wrapped around his torso. Your other hand lifted up to gently brush the tears away. Not once did you take your eyes off of him. How could you when you had him, a pure work of art, standing in front of you?

"And I'll always be here, waiting for you either after the game to embrace you. No matter, win or lose, I'm don't plan on going anywhere, if that is okay with you." "It's more than okay," he whispered.

Winning tonight and securing a spot in the playoffs would have been nice. However, Seokmin now realized the greatest victory was making you his one and only. That's the goal he's been aiming for all season.

blanket fort | seokmin

haven't published anything in 5ever so here's a lil drabble. seokmin is so cute and silly and i would love to build a fort with him <3 also idk but i don't think there's any warnings.

"you didn't think this through, at all, even a little bit."

"sure didn't."

"have you ever built a blanket fort before?" you ask with an amused shake of your head.

"not even one time," seokmin admits, and you both giggle.

"really? tragic." you kiss his fingers intertwined with yours as you look at the mess on the living room floor in front of the TV. there was almost nothing that identified it as even an attempt at a fort -- just a clump of sheets, fluffy blankets, and the occasional pillow or two. "why didn't you ask for help?"

"because," he sasses, "i was trying to surprise you." he pulls out his phone and shows you a photo of an incredible blanket fort on pinterest. "this was my goal. and this is the reality." he can't help but laugh at himself.

the fort in the picture is beautiful, strung with fairy lights and made of cute floral blankets. it doesn't resemble the knotted lump in the center of the room at all, but you're still touched that he tried. "well, i have amazing news," you tell him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. "i'm the best blanket fort-builder in the universe."

"well, that's quite the claim," he says, wrapping his own arms around your waist and pecking you on the lips. "wanna back it up?"

and so, in the fading, golden afternoon light, you help the most beautiful boy in the world build a blanket fort. the pile of blankets transforms into a tent-like structure around the TV. seokmin helps you drag the mattress into the fort, and the two of you snuggle together while you watch your favorite show, his hands dragging soft lines across the back of your arms. somehow, these tiny moments are the things that give your life the most meaning -- laying here with seokmin on a windy fall evening, feeling loved and protected in his arms.

"you were right," he mumbles sleepily, interrupting your gentle thoughts.

"about what?"

"you are the best fort-builder in the universe."