Taeyung - Tumblr Posts
𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐒 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐂𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌
↠ summary: join the ride of seven best friends as they navigate their way through the stress, love, joy, and adventure that college brings.
↠ pairings: taejoon, 2seok, yoonkookmin
↠ genre: crack (honestly 95% of the book), angst, fluff
↠ word count: 721
↠ warnings: everybody is BIG gay, language, they just want some dick :(
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𝘾𝙃𝘼𝙋𝙏𝙀𝙍 𝙊𝙉𝙀: 𝘿𝙊 𝙉𝙊𝙏 𝙏𝙊𝙐𝘾𝙃
suckjin
alright u hoes
suckjin
which one of u ate the leftovers in the fridge
suckjin
that were clearly labeled “SEOKJINS FOOD! DO NOT TOUCH”
temptaetion
wasn’t me i swear
jeoncena
i bet all of my money that it was tae
hoesuck
i second that notion
temptaetion
you guys are horrible
temptaetion
jin believes me
suckjin
no i dont
suckjin
i have three suspects in mine
suckjin
it was either tae, joon, or jimin
suckjin
and 2 out of 3 of those suspects are silent.
jimoaning
srry i’m busy
jimoaning
WAIT WHY AM I A FUCKING SUSPECT
namjukebox
do you guys like..not have class?
jeoncena
it’s saturday egghead
namjukebox
so all of you just watched me get dressed, grab my books, and walk out the door to the other side of campus
namjukebox
all of you...fake.
minsugay
but i just woke up…
temptaetion
it’s 2pm
minsugay
and?
temptaetion
your lazy ass should be up
suckjin
AS I WAS SAYING
suckjin
which one of you dusty, bum-ass, ungrateful little hoes ate my leftovers
hoesuck
shit im sorry, that was me
suckjin
dont worry, i can make more
temptaetion
the DOUBLE STANDARDS
temptaetion
i would’ve gotten beaten
temptaetion
hard.
namjukebox
kinky
temptaetion
ahaha ;)
minsugay
can yall like flirt somewhere else pls
jimoaning
embrace the gay
jeoncena
jimin’s only saying that because my man has like 10 different boyfriends
namjukebox
is that why u were busy earlier jimin..
jimoaning
i was busy giving myself stis
suckjin
oh
minsugay
oh
hoesuck
oh
namjukebox
oh
temptaetion
oh
jeoncena
oh
jimoaning
i know damn well that this isn’t surprising any of you
hoesuck
who shares a dorm with jimin again?
jeoncena
me...unfortunately
hoesuck
alright everybody gather around for a prayer circle
hoseok
on this day, we pray for jungkook’s ears. we pray that that they stay intact and that jimin and whoever is in his room at the time..stay quiet.
temptaetion
amen
minsugay
don’t act like you’re a fucking saint
hoesuck
no swearing in the prayer circle @minsugay
minsugay
you see jesus has given me a free pass
namjukebox
plot twist, i am jesus
suckjin
well, jesus bring back my food
temptaetion
i thought you said that you could make some more
suckjin
i CAN but…
namjukebox
just admit to the double standards and go
suckjin
shut the fuck up
hoesuck
why is this still a conversation
minsugay
what happened to ‘no swearing in the prayer circle’
jeoncena
this is what i call discrimination against asians
suckjin
we are all asian
jimoaning
some hotter than others *cough*
minsugay
like me
jimoaning
don’t get cocky now
temptaetion
dw yoonglo boonglo, jimin thinks you’re hot
namjukebox
jimin thinks that everyone is hot if they have a dick
jeoncena
yoongi especially
jimoaning
exCuse me? your just jealous that your ugly
jeoncena
first of all, you’re*
minsugay
thanks jimin, i appreciate the love
jimoaning
???
suckjin
y’all are fucking gay
hoesuck
we know
temptaetion
oh we appreciating our homies now?
temptaetion
namjoon…
namjukebox
taehyung..
temptation
i appreciate you bro
namjukebox
i appreciate you too bro
minsugay
one panicked gay + another panicked gay = joon and tae
namjukebox
shut up
jeoncena
yoongi the poet
minsugay
how-
jeoncena
it rhymed
hoesuck
only jungkook would notice that
hoesuck
only jungkook
temptaetion
anyways….hey yoongiiiiii
minsugay
what do u want peasant
suckjin
HEY!
suckjin
only i am superior over all of u...so only i have the power to call you guys peasants
minsugay
alright go off
temptaetion
yoongiiii….can u uber eats me panda express
minsugay
no, i fucking can’t
namjukebox
bet you could deliver some food to jungkook
namjukebox
i heard he likes meat
minsugay
what-
jeoncena
that is all jimin
jimoaning
yoongi’s dick is too small for my standards
temptaetion
and how would you know, our holy child park jimin
hoesuck
our holy child park jimin who comes to my prayer circles every day
hoesuck
our holy child park jimin who does not indulge in horrid behavior
jeoncena
holy child park jimin who dosent know how to fucking wash the dishes
minsugay
holy child park jimin who has probably contracted all the stis in the book
jimoaning
shut up, tiny dick
suckjin
you probably wanna suck it though
jimoaning
i am not ignoring seokjin when i say this
jimoaning
...but whos dorm for tonight?
temptaetion
not ours, it’s messy as fuck
suckjin
now wait a damn minute
suckjin
i just cleaned it yesterday
temptaetion
that’s unfortunate
namjukebox
guess that means it’s our dorm
minsugay
when did i agree to this
namjukebox
when did anyone say that you had a say
