Themes: Exes - Tumblr Posts
When we see our exes and their current girlfriends in public:
Ex: hey. haven't seen you in who knows how long. How you been?
Us: I found someone who is 10X BETTER than you! Plus, he treats me like a queen, takes me to places on dates, never lies and make excuses to leave for no reason, and gives me really sweet gifts that your stupid ass never have the balls to do at all! Except you chose to do them with that.....THING you call a cow!
His girlfriend: excuse me!?
Ex: look. Im sorry about all that ya know? We were young and dumb in high school. Plus, Don't mistreat my woman like that! So who is this guy you're seeing? What does he look like? How tall is he? Hm?
Us: *calls to him* baby!? You can come down now! In troduce yourself!
Leo: greetings. You must be her ex and you must be his girlfriend. Nice to be aquainted. Hope you two don't mistreat my lady like last time or else!...she tells me everything so you better watch it!
Donnie: *Sips his juice box* Mm! Hello. You must be her vile ex, and you must be his ugly guinea pig. You two better leave my baby dove alone! She is a sweetheart! She did nothing to deserve pain! You better learn to shut your tonsils you call mouths! You want me to give you a life time supply of shock therapy!? Cuz I'll do it!
Raph: *jumps down* Sup ya two retards! You both better watch your backs cuz I'll kick your asses if ya step foot into the city anywhere, anytime! Quit hurtin my babe! She did nothin to ya to deserve it! I'll protect her through thick and thin! And guess what!? She likes my monster cock better than your sorry excuse for a chode mama's boy! And what the fuck are you wearing!? you look like a gay guy! And plus, I fuck my baby real good as I see her face look like a hot anime chick on ecstasy! But enough about that, Ya got five seconds to fuck off or else!
Mikey: sup ya weirdos. Leave my babycakes alone. She is a sweet marshmallow, and the cheese to my pepperoni! I love everything about her. Her smile, her cooch, her curves, her boobies, her eyes, her hair, and above all, her dazzling personality! Unlike you, who treat her like trash and you went ahead for a no good low life who look like she got daddy issues. You two better stay away from my girl, or I'm gonna nunchuck yo asses! And remember! I'll be watching you like a ghost! So ya better watch out! *makes ghost noises at them*
Us: Isn't he charming?
Ex: WTF!!?
His Girlfriend: *Screams*
