Tom Holland X Reader Fanfiction - Tumblr Posts

5 years ago

dominance

a/n: so this kind of happened to me irl... i was just trying to get my phone back :P i didn’t touch his thing or lay on him, though... also, should i make a part two to this and it'll just be smut? i prob will

warnings: fluff, teasing, slight dom!reader, minor sexual terms, two swear words

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I woke to Tom singing Perfect by Ed Sheeran. His voice soft and angelic, making me fall in love with him all over again. 

I pushed the white blanket off my bare body, rolling off the bed. I grabbed one of Tom's shirts, covering my body from mid-thigh, up. The neck opening was a bit too big for my petite body, exposing my left shoulder.

I quietly made my way out of the bedroom, not before grabbing my phone, sneaking into the kitchen. I hid behind the wall, watching Tom sing and dance while making us breakfast. I took this opportunity to film him in his own world.

-

Tom was enjoying himself and he was with the love of his life. All his worries had blown away. He didn't want or need to think about going away for filming right now. As long as he was with Y/N, he could feel at ease.

Tom and Y/N have known one another ever since kindergarten. They grew up together, some could even say "conjoined by the hip." Tom fell for Y/N in the 6th grade. Y/N fell for Tom in the 8th. Neither of them was brave enough to tell each other about their feelings, afraid of ruining their friendship. Everyone knew about how they felt but noticed how oblivious the two of them were. This frustrated many people, including their own parents, though they never acted on it. When news spread that Tom had finally asked out Y/N everyone celebrated, except for the girls in their high school that hoped they would have a chance with Tom.

Tom thought that Perfect was a great song to bring back the valued memories. The nostalgia of the time he brought her to prom flooded his mind.

He knocked on the red door, fiddling with the corsage box nervously. The door flung open and Y/D/N pulled Tom into a tight hug.

"Tom! How you doin' mate?"

"Pretty good, Mr Y/L/N, You?"

Her dad patted Tom's shoulder, "Please, you can just call me Y/D/N, and I'm doing great, thank you."

Just as her dad was about to ask another question, Y/N had walked down the stairs in the dazzling gown. It was a plunging neckline tulle dress. It accented her curves beautifully. The ivory glitter sparkled gloriously, while the baby pink tulle skirt flowed gracefully as she walked.

Both her father and Tom were dumbfounded. Her father started tearing up and Tom felt his heart beat faster as blood travelled to his cheeks.

"What're you staring at? Let's get going," Y/N giggled.

"You look gorgeous," Tom whispers gently into her ear. Blushing, she quietly says thank you and gets ready to leave.

The night goes by quickly. Y/N and Tom would never confess that that prom was the best they've ever experienced.

-

He continues to belt his heart out and dance his ass off and I keep recording. I might've giggled too loudly, giving away my hiding spot. Tom's head snapped in my direction, seeing my phone out and facing him, he rushes over and snatches the phone out of my hand, trying to erase the clip.

"No, Tommy," I whined.

He walked into the dining room, holding my phone tightly in his hand. I chased after him, trying to pull it out of his grip.

"Give me my phone back, please," I beg desperately.

"No, I'm going to delete the video first," his voice, teasing.

I look over to my unlocked phone, and worriedly, I push him onto the table. I tower over him, pushing my body onto his, breathing heavily onto his neck. My hand slides down his abs, tracing each indent before sliding my hand further down, teasingly grazing his throbbing cock. In the moment of the heat, I snatch my phone out of his faltered grip. I get off his body, thanking him before exiting the room. I can feel his gaze on my barely covered body, checking out my ass and legs. A quiet groan came out of his mouth as he realized how hard he was, making me giggle and run into our bedroom.


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4 years ago

shitty days

a/n: my inspiration is obviously myself,,, honestly had multiple emotional breakdowns for the past two days. never thought i could be so emotionally exhausted. the reader is so lucky, she has someone to love and rely on... unlike me

warnings: lots of angst, uwu fluff, inappropriate words/terms

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The past few days had been shit. Not only did I find out that my so-called friends were using me for popularity, but I haven't been able to clear my mind and study for the upcoming finals. I felt like I was standing on the edge of a cliff that led to a neverending pit of darkness. I had multiple emotional breakdowns in the last few days, leaving my face red and puffy. People eyed me as I rushed across campus to my dorm. It was always embarrassing to feel their eyes following my every movement, judging me from afar.

Today was no different, if anything, it was worse. My professor had turned everyone's attention to my unconscious figure, mocking me and using me as an example of bad behaviour. I woke to the giggling of the other students and noticed their eyes focused on me. The professor burst out in laughter, pointing at my face. I grabbed my phone and looked at the selfie camera to see my face stained with black marks. The words 'whore,' 'slut,' and 'bitch' etched on my forehead and cheeks. Above my lips, they drew a moustache that looked like a dick. I froze in shock horror embarrassment. Tears filled my eyes, threatening to spill out. I grabbed my stuff and ran. I ran back to my dorm, never looking back once. I broke down in my dorm, sitting on the floor with my knees bent and my face buried in them. Black tears rolled down my face, dripping onto the cold, concrete floor.

I could've, would've, fallen asleep there, but I remembered about the ink on my face. I stoop up and waddled to the bathroom, hovering over the sink, I don't look up at the mirror, dreading what I'll see in the reflection. I scrubbed my face until my arms gave out and my face felt numb.

I walked out, putting on an oversized crewneck and shorts. I decided that going to visit Tom would make me feel better, so I grabbed my car keys and drove.

When I arrived at the all too familiar house, I parked my car in the driveway next to his car. Mustering as much energy as I could, I put on a fake smile and tried to pull myself together. I stood up straight, tapping the door with my fist twice.

"Hey, darling," Tom smiled, embracing me.

"Hi, Tommy," I giggled genuinely, melting into the hug.

"It's been such a shitty day for me," the two of us said in unison.

"You can go first," Tom welcomed me into his humble abode.

Once I stepped into his home, I broke. Something in me just snapped.

"Today has been the worst, Tommy. My classmates and professor made fun of me because I fell asleep in class, and-" Tom cut me off.

"Bloody hell, why are you sleeping in class?" He groaned.

"W-Well with finals and all, I've just been studying really, really har-" I tried explaining.

"I don't want to hear any excuses, Y/N. You shouldn't be sleeping in class. I'm not helping you pay for your tuition for you to sleep in class. Fuck," Tom brought a hand into his mop of hair, "Sorry, go on."

"They- uh- they- well..." I fidgeted with my fingers.

"For fuck sake, Y/N, spit it out!" Tom rolled his eyes.

"They drew on my face! They wrote really mean things. They called me a slut and a whore and a bitch. Then, they drew a penis-looking moustache on my face. And, I also found out that my only friends liked me because I was dating a celebrity. Because I was dating you! I-I just can't do it anymore, Tom, I really can't." My sobs shook my entire body, travelling down my spine and on every bone of my body.

"Look, darling, I'm sorry I snapped at you. I was just frustrated because work has been shit recently. I love you, princess. You have many other friends who do care for you, like Haz, Z, Jacob, and even more! Please don't doubt yourself. It'll get better, I promise." Tom kissed the top of my forehead, "Now let's get some rest. You must be emotionally drained," I hummed 'yes' in reply. "Let's go to bed and cuddle, darling."

"Tom?" I looked up at him as he carried me to the bedroom bridal style, "I love you."

Tom smiled down at me, "I love you, too."


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4 years ago

late night cuddles

a/n: i just reached 400 followers! thank you so much! here’s a little gift for you guys. hope you enjoy and sleep tight

warnings: pure fluff, the smallest pinch of angst

pairing: roommate!bestfriend!tom x reader

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Tom heard your muffled shrieks and cries through the thin walls of your shared flat. He rushed out of his bed, quickly walking to your room. Slightly creaking the door open, he saw you fumbling around on the bed, still yelping. Tom allowed himself in, closing the door behind. When he approached your bed, he acknowledged the tears rolling down your rosy cheeks, making his heart ache.

“Y/N, darling,” Tom shook your shaking body, attempting to wake you, “wake up, it’s okay, I’m here.”

Your eyes fluttered open and you let out a loud exhale, “Tommy?”

“It’s okay, love, I’m here. You’re safe,” his hand moved up to stroke your soft, yet tangled, hair.

You hummed in response, snuggling yourself into him. Tom placed a gentle kiss on the top of your head, comforting you through your panic. You started to lull to sleep once again and you felt his movements falter. To your delight, he continued and started to quietly sing,

“I used to wanna be living like there’s only me,

but now I spend my time thinking ‘bout a way to get you off my mind.

I used to be so tough,

never really gave enough,

and then you caught my eye,

giving me a feeling of a lightning strike.”

Tom was too shy to sing in your presence, but you adored his voice. You surely were going to fall asleep in his arms, but you felt him shift underneath you, tucking you neatly in your heap of blankets. It replaced his warmth and you were already craving Tom’s scent and body heat. Desperately, you weakly called out, “Stay, please.”

“Alright, love,” Tom slid under the sheets, joining you once again.

Your head was pressed against his chest as he wrapped his arm around you, tangling your legs around one another. You could hear the steady rhythm of his heartbeat, bringing you into a deep slumber. 

Tom felt your movements minimize, realizing you had fallen asleep. 

“Love you,” he said, following you in your slumber.


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4 years ago

trick shot fail

a/n: I’m so sorry I haven’t posted for the past two? three? days, I’ve been having a writers block, so I just wrote this quick blurb,,, I hope you enjoy

warnings: one curse word, trick shots in the house don’t do at home kids, tom being a clutz, fluff

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You were snuggled on couch in a mountain of blankets, rewatching the classic Disney movies. Tom, on the other hand, was practicing trick shots.

Recently, he and the boys had been obsessed with them, and honestly, they were pretty good at it. Well, except for Tom. As much as he practiced and out effort into the tricks, he would always mess up. On rare occasions, he would get it, but the chances were slim, very, very slim.

“I, I can be everything you need, if you’re the one for me, like gravity, I’ll be unstoppable...” you sang along with the song, Hero.

Starstruck was your favorite classic Disney movie. You loved the plot, the climax, and, most importantly, the songs. If you were being honest, the movie was underrated.

“Woo,” you heard Tom cheer from behind you.

“Tom, I swear if you’re doing trick shots in the house, I-,” you were cut off when a round, solid object bounced on your head.

You turned to see Tom’s shocked facial expression, “Shit, shit, shit. I’m so sorry, darling,” he started to grab your head, touching around it to see if you were okay, “let me get you an ice pack.”

“I told you not to do trick shots in the house. See what happened?” You glared at Tom, who was rushing around the kitchen, grabbing you your ice and a chocolate bar to make you feel better and not hate him.

“Yeah, I know, darling. I just got carried away,” he kissed the tip of your nose, icing your head, “it’ll never happen again, I promise.”

“Good,” you lightly pecked him on the lips, “now, watch Starstruck with me.”

“Anything for you, princess,” Tom wrapped his arm around you, letting you cuddle and lean into him.


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4 years ago

Hi, i love your other writings on Tom Holland, could i request 92 & 93 from the prompt list please? 💌

fractured trust and broken friendships

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a/n: this was supposed to be posted last night, but I accidentally fell asleep... luckily i was almost done... thank you to @in-a-lot-of-fandoms-tbh for being so active and giving me motivation to continue ♡ hope you guys enjoy this angsty fic!

pairing: bestfriend!tom x reader

warnings: TRIGGER WARNING! panic attack, mentions of sex, swearing, tom’s a jerk in this one, a pinch of fluff if you count it as really

italics are your thoughts and in between the “-“ is a flashbacks

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92. “I was a bet?”

93. “I’m such a fucking idiot for thinking that you would ever fall for me.”

You rushed to your first class of the day, maneuvering your way through the empty halls. You'd woken up late due to your alarm not sounding, so you only had less than 10 minutes to get ready and make it to school on time. Unfortunately for you, you lived on your own without any source of transportation except for the pair of legs attached to your body. You ended up running to school with a heavy backpack painfully slapping against your back with each step.

You slowed to a fast walk, recognizing the corner you turned everyday to get to class. A voice sounded from the corner.

“So, did you do it, Tommy?” A high-pitched voice asked.

You wondered who would’ve ditched class with the name “Tommy.”

“Yeah, mate, or were you too pussy to?” A male’s voice sounded.

You knew it was wrong to listen in, but you were unintentionally listening.

“The only pussy here is you, Williams,” a familiar voice responded, “and yes, I did do it. It was easier than I thought. Now, pay up.”

That voice. It sounded too familiar. It couldn’t be...

“Can’t believe you actually got Y/N to fuck you,” another voice laughed.

The mention of your name made you sick. Someone bet on you? It wasn’t possible, though. You were a virgin only until recently. Your best friend, Tom, had taken it from you last week.

No. It can’t be him.

“I was shocked, too. She was practically jumping to get with me,” the voice chuckled, growing louder. 

You realized that they were rounding the corner, and your anxiety spiked. You felt your chest tightening, and you felt lightheaded. Tears pricked the corners of your eyes. You stumbled backward, reaching for support. Any support. 

Slow breath in, slow breath out. You chanted to yourself.

You could hear the loud, rapid thumps in your chest. You gasped for air, slamming against the lockers, creating an echo of metal. 

“What the fuck was that?” The voice was muffled by your heartbeat pounding in your ears.

You tried to stand, but your body collapsed beneath you. This was one of your worst episodes.

“Y/N,” a panicked voice shouted.

You felt a warm presence envelop you.

“Y/N, listen to my voice. Slow breathes,” you could feel something rising and descending against your arm, and you followed the pattern.

Gradually, you regained control over your emotions and actions. You looked up to see who helped you, and it was just the man you were dreading to see. He looked down at you with a warm smile and welcoming eyes. You snapped your eyes shut and composed yourself.

Reopening your eyes, you pushed Tom away and dizzily stood up. He looked at you the way he always would when you were together: with compassion and empathy.

“Are you okay? That was one of the worst attacks I’ve ever seen you have,” he spoke gently.

“I was a bet?” You wanted to ask, but nothing sounded.

His voice rang in your ears. It brought back memories of the night you shared together.

-

“Are you sure you want this?” Tom asked, voice raspy.

“Yes, please, Tommy,” you panted.

He slowly slid into you, letting you adjust to his size. You winced, sharply inhaling.

“Are you okay?” He paused, mindful that it was your first time.

“Mhm, just need time to get used to it,” you replied, breathing deeply.

-

“I-I’m fine,” you backed away from him and his friends, feeling manipulated.

“Are you sure? You’re shaking,” he stepped forward, reaching an arm towards you.

“Stop,” you yelped, slapping his arm away, “Don’t touch me,” you hissed through grit teeth.

“Y-Y/N/N?” He asked, brows furrowing.

“I need to get to class, so if you’ll excuse me,” you said, picking up your backpack.

You pushed past the girl beside Tom. She wore a yellow gingham, spaghetti strapped crop top paired with light washed, belted paper-bag shorts.

How she didn’t get dress-coded, you’ll never know, nor did you care.

She scoffed and held her shoulder in offense.

“Tommy, she hit me,” the girl whined.

You rolled your eyes and walked off, trying your best to ignore the snickers from Tom’s other friends.

As you turned to corner, you heard the sound of footsteps approaching you. Assuming it was a teacher, you plastered a fake smile onto your face and made a liable excuse, but when you turned around, you came face to face more like face to chest with your “best friend.”

“What’s wrong?” He asked, confusion etched on his features.

“Nothing,” you took a deep breath, trying to keep your temper in check.

“I know something’s wrong, so tell me,” he demanded, grabbing your shoulders with his hands.

“Let go of me,” you ripped away from his hold.

You were fuming. How dare he act like he wasn’t just laughing about taking your virginity and, not to mention, making money from it, as well.

“What the he-” he began.

“You! You’re the problem,” he looked at you as if you had slapped him across the face which you wish you did. “I overheard you and your friends earlier. You think it’s funny to play girls like that? Even worse, you have the guts to take her virginity, too? Unlike you, I’d like my first time to be special and not paid for,” you spat.

You turned to walk away when you felt a sudden surge of confidence shoot through you.

“You know what, Thomas? You are a pussy. You’re weak enough to let your reputation get to you and strip away one of your friends. If I knew that you were this egotistical manipulator sooner, I would’ve abandoned you years ago.”

You saw a flash of hurt in his teary eyes.

“Fucking grow up. We’re going to college soon, not kindergarten. I can’t believe I was such a fool. I let you use me. 

“I thought I could trust you, Tom. You were my best friend, my partner in crime. You were supposed to be beside me until the end. I trusted you with my life.

“I let you be my first because I thought- I thought... Nevermind. I’m such a fucking idiot for thinking that you would ever fall for me.”

“Y/N/N, I-” he frowned.

“I don’t want to hear it. This is the end of our friendship, so don’t talk to me ever again,” and with that, you turned your back towards him and walked away, leaving him to regret ever considering the bet.


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4 years ago

the right decision

❧ prompt: you and tom grew up together but always as enemies — nothing more, nothing less. as you grow older, you must realize it’s time to be mature. you either must throw tom out of your life or take him in as an ally. which will you choose?

❧ pairing: prince!tom holland x princess!reader

❧ genre: angst, e2l

❧ warnings: light swearing, hints of infidelity, hints of a toxic relationship

❧ a/n: this was half-assed because i didn’t have the will to write this lmao but i feel bad for not posting anything over my break, so... there’s gonna be a second part to this because, like i said, i had no will to write these past few days. happy new years, merry belated christmas/happy belated hanukkah 

chap. 2 →

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Stepping into the ballroom, you are met with hundreds of pairs of eyes staring at you.

You are clad in an elegant gown of ivory fabrics and sewn-on golden delicacies. Your feet are already stinging in pain from the uncomfortable stilettos you wore. Your hair is pulled back into a braided half-up styles, gentle waves accenting your beautiful face. 

The music abruptly begins, and everybody’s eyes have avert back to converse with the others in the room. Only does one pair of eyes not leave your figure as you glide down the grand staircase.

You can hear your heart pounding loudly in your chest, a bundle of nerves stir in your stomach.

Usually, you avoided attending these crowded occasions because whenever you did, you’d get weird stares from the other princesses.

As you curtsey politely to passing royals, a familiar figure catches your gaze. Closing your eyes into an elongated blink, you open your eyes once again to ensure that your eyes aren’t playing tricks on you. When the image stays the same, it’s all the confirmation you need.

Your longtime arch-nemesis was standing beside a large, marble pillar, smirking at you. 

For a moment, you feel a sudden rush of relief at the familiar face, but dread overtakes you, once again, as you realize that you have to spend the night with the infuriating man. 

From behind you, a hand rests on the small of your back, and a voice fills your ear, “Good evening, darling.”

You stiffen at the familiar voice. Forcing yourself to face the man beside you, you plaster a fake smile on your face. 

“Vincent,” you inwardly cringe at the taste of his name coming off your lips, “I didn’t know you’d be attending tonight.’

“I could say the same for you. You never were one to attend these events,” he eyes you strangely, “Unless you were lying to me?”

Your eyes widen at the accusation, and you scoff, “I don’t lie about foolish verity, unlike some.” Your voice comes out bitter, features mirroring your tone.

“I don’t understand what you're trying to imply, my darling,” a wicked grin grows on Vincent’s face.

You roll your eyes, fists clenching at your sides. You laugh spitefully, desperately trying to prevent yourself from knocking that grin off his face.

“You-” you are cut off by an accented voice.

“Excuse me, who are you?” The voice says.

“Vincent Callon, Prince of Averna,” Vincent bows before raising a suspicious brow at the man, “You are?”

“Tom. Tom Holland of,” the brunette pauses for a moment, “it doesn’t concern you.”

“How disrespectful,” Vincent snarls at Tom’s remark.

“I could say the same about you. What kind of man promises a woman all of his love and loyalty to crush it within less than 24 hours?” Tom snaps, slyly.

“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” Vincent growls through clenched teeth.

“Do I? Or is it you?”

The tension was uncanny to any other being in the room. You, being the reason of which, decide to speak up and end their quarrel.

“Well, it was,” you gulp, “nice to see you again, Vincent, but we must be going. There is much to do, tonight, especially since I don’t often appear at such events.”

Not letting him reply, you grab Tom by the hand and drag him along with you, ignoring the burning sensation of his hand in your small, in comparison, hand. You pull him through the crowd of people, barely acknowledging the glares you received from envious princesses. 

When the pair of you are in an isolated space, you snarl, “What was that?”

“What was what?” He asks, blatantly.

“Don’t do this with me right now. I’m already as mad as it is,” you sigh, hand reaching to massage your temples.

“You seemed uncomfortable,” he shrugged, uselessly.

Scoffing, you reply, “As if you care.” Looking him right in the eyes, albeit making your fierceness falter, you ask him with entirely seriousness in your voice, “Why’d you help me? What do you think you’ll achieve from it?”

Furious, he snaps, “I don’t think I’ll achieve shit from helping you! Why are you assuming the worst of me? I don’t want to keep this petty relationship between us! I’ve known you since you were just a newborn. How long are you going to hate me?”

Shocked at his sudden outburst, you stutter, “T-Tom, I... I don’t know what to say,” he throws you an unimpressed look, “I’m sorry. I didn’t know my behavior offended you. I just thought-”

“Thought that I hated you?”

You shamefully nodded.

“Great to know you think highly of me,” he rolls his eyes, walking past you in fury, hurt, and humiliation.

“Tom,” you call out, turning to face the direction he walked away in.

You thought that if Tom ignored you and let you be, you would be happier and complete, but now that he’s walked out of your life, you can’t help but feel guilty and ashamed of yourself.

Did you make the right decision?


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4 years ago

her hidden crystal tears

❧ synopsis: keeping a relationship under covers isn’t an easy feat. when a popular, successful jock of a college, who has many obsessive fans, dates an average student, they decide that it’s better to keep their relationship secret due to safety reasons, but when the jock starts to become more ignorant of how their s/o is feeling, what might happen to their barely stable relationship?

❧ pairing: jock!tom x fem!reader

❧ genre: angst

❧ warnings: lots of angst (?), petty girl fights technically harassment, crying, pent-up emotions, unhealthy coping

❧ a/n: this is an unedited fic, as always and I didn’t know how to end it because I had two endings in mind. I might write both endings (angst and fluff) or maybe I’ll let you guys suffer lmao I’m kidding I originally was writing a blurb about the reader hiding their emotions/hiding their tears by feigning happiness, but I ended up writing like a 2500+ word fic lmao. also if some shit seems wack, it’s because I posted this on my phone.

alternate fluff ending here: let them flow

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Swerving through the large crowd, you found yourself a seat on the filled bleachers, squeezing to fit in the front rows to spot your boyfriend. Looking about, you located your brunette partner jogging into the field arms raised in the air, pointing towards the crowd you were hidden in. He waved his hand mindlessly, eyes scanning the ocean of screaming schoolmates and “fangirls.” His gaze finally fell on you, and his face lit up, bringing a pink haze to your cheeks as he blew a kiss in your direction. The girls sat beside you screamed out, pretending to catch his kiss and sending one back. 

You and Tom decided to keep your relationship under covers, due to the overly obsessive “fangirls.” Both of you knew it would be the best option to keep you safe. If you were ever injured or threatened by one of his “fangirls,” Tom wouldn’t be able to forgive himself. 

Tom held the leather ball in the crook of his arm, with the other pushing his way through the attacking team. Calculating his success, he dove into a touchdown, scoring him and his team the winning point. 

The anticipating crowd jumped up, cheering loudly and hugging one another, whereas the visitor team’s crowd let out a loud, mutual sigh of disappointment. 

You jumped out of your seat, screaming out your lungs as you stared, wide-eyed, at your beaming boyfriend. His teammates had lifted him into the air, tossing him about. You giggled as he caught your eye, slyly winking at you. 

Lost in your own world, you almost ran down to where Tom was before you saw a hoard of girls jumping and reaching their arms out to grab at him. Frowning, you walked away from the crowd to retreat to the warmth of Tom’s car. 

You scrolled through the collection of images you and Tom had had together, warmly smiling at the memories. You let out a breathy laugh, selecting on one specific memory: Tom’s head laid on your lap, eyes shut, and lips puckered lightly as he let out even breaths. 

The car door beside you opened, shaking you out of your train of thought. 

“Hey,” your eyes were met with the blue pupils you weren’t expecting. 

“Haz?” You looked behind him, hoping to find your beloved boyfriend. 

“Tom — um — he told me to drive you back to the dorms, said he would be heading to the celebratory party,” Harrison explained, eyes shaking with concern and sympathy. 

“Oh, I understand,” your smile not quite making it to your eyes.

“He was being hoarded by his,” Haz hesitates, “fangirls. He didn’t want you to get involved.”

“It’s all good, Hazzy. No need to worry about me,” you let out a feigned laugh. 

You stepped into the warm building, waving Harrison goodbye. Another football victory, same schedule. 

You go to Tom’s game to support and cheer him on, Tom wins, you avoid him, Tom’s “fangirls” hoard him, you wait in Tom’s car, Harrison comes instead of Tom, Harrison brings you back to your dorm while Tom goes to his party, you fall asleep in your own arms: the ‘Tom’s football victory’ schedule, named and created by you. 

To say the least, you weren’t fond of the last half of the schedule. You always were left alone to celebrate Tom’s victory on your own, while Tom was doing who-knows-what at the afterparty. 

In full honesty, you were slowly growing tired of hiding your affection for one another. You didn’t know how much longer you could hold onto this style of dating. If the pair of you were going to date, you would date publicly and however you wanted, whether it meant risking your safety or not. Besides, you weren’t some helpless girl that doesn’t and can’t protect herself.

The next day, you woke up with an aching head and puffy eyes. Groaning, you looked into your mirror located at the corner of your room. You flinched at the sight of your pink, tear-stained cheeks and tangled, mop hair. Pushing yourself off the soft mattress, you stumbled into your bathroom, prepping a warm shower to start your day off fresh.

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With your laptop and notebook resting in your arms, against your chest, you made your way to your next lecture. You walked sluggishly across the large campus, occasionally catching a glimpse of passing football team members. 

A specific group you walked past caught your attention. You saw the familiar brunette curls in your peripheral vision, immediately making you turn your gaze towards it. You saw his warm smile as he chuckled with his group of friends, some of his “fangirls” giggling along with the group. 

There Tom stood, laughing and joking about with his peers, radiating happiness. He was basking in the attention he received from his friends and “fans.” 

You tried to catch his eye, and you swore you did for a split second, but he only walked past you as if you weren’t even there. Not even a hidden smile or wink of acknowledgment was sent your way. 

Your walking came to a stop as you frowned at your boyfriend’s back. You wanted to shout out his name, call for his attention. You wanted to nuzzle into his chest, breathing in his scent. You wanted to look into his chocolate-pooled eyes, see the twinkle of adoration as he stared at you. Nevertheless, you couldn’t. You couldn’t do anything with Tom in public, for you were just another girl on campus, trying to get by, and Tom was the successful jock with a bright future ahead.

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You walked into the large room, taking a seat, conveniently, in front of Tom. This time, you were the one to not spare him a single glance, albeit he probably wasn’t expecting or looking for one. 

You tried your best to listen and focus on the lecture, but the consistent whispers behind your back began to nag at your patience. You leaned your down further into your notes, as if it could fix the slowly kindling fire in you. Checking the clock, you saw that only five minutes of the lecture had passed, and your professor had barely said anything. 

“Five minutes? I swear it felt like half of the lecture had gone by. And the professor. I swear he had just said like tons of important information,” you muttered to yourself under your breath, catching a few students’ gazes. 

You gently pounded a fist into your temple, forcing your attention onto the lined sheets of paper on your desk. You expected to see notes, not illegible scribbles. You silently groaned, switching the sheet for a new, clean page. You took a deep breath and began jotting down the key points of the presentation that was being projected onto the large whiteboard. 

A feminine voice cleared their throat beside you, “Excuse me.”

You looked up from your work, a glare on your face as you were pulled out of your focus once again.

“Can I help you?” You asked, irritated. 

“Uh, yes, you can. You can help me by moving yourself to that seat over there,” she pointed at an empty seat across the room, “and giving this,” she placed her hand on the desk, atop you notes, “seat to me.”

You scoffed, “And why should I?”

“Oh, honey,” you cringed at the nickname, “Tommy, here,” she nodded towards Tom, “shouldn’t have to suffer by looking at your terrible hair. Like, honestly, do you even care for your looks?”

You were practically fuming in your seat, but to avoid trouble, you responded with a monotonous voice, “I’m sure “Tommy” can take care of himself. Spare us both the inconvenience, and go sit yourself on that empty seat because if you couldn’t tell, I’m occupying this spot.”

“Who do you think you are?” She shouted, hand crumpling your notes.

Furrowing your brows, you grabbed at your notes, hoping to spare them.

“Move your ugly ass before I kick you off this seat,” she threatened, pulling you by your hair.

The professor stopped talking, glaring at the pair of you. You took it as a sign to shut up and not fight back.

Fist clenching, nails creating red crescents in your palm, you stood up, pushing the girl off of you, ignoring her gasp. You grabbed your notes and laptop, turning to see if Tom would defend you, but when you saw his passive expression, you let out a quiet laugh of disappointment, carrying yourself to the back of the room. 

For the rest of the class, you stood in the back, writing your notes with blurry, tear-filled vision. Although you were still in shock due to the event that had unfolded minutes into the lecture, you wouldn’t let it falter how you were doing in school. 

As soon as you were dismissed, you bolted out of the room, heading to your safe haven on campus. 

Not many people, if any, knew about the hidden garden located within the campus’s vast park. You had only discovered it by accident when you were a freshman looking for your way around campus. 

The first thought you had when you walked in was that you were transported into a different dimension. Thinking back on it, you were naive to think that, but you were still justified. Anyone would think such a beautiful place couldn’t belong to the aggressivity and rashness of this world. The variant shades of light green and pastel pink flowers growing between the weeds of grass gave the place a heavenly feeling, followed by the mist that sparkled under the sunlight. 

You dropped yourself at the thick tree’s stump, letting your notes and laptop slip out of your grasp. You cried into your knees, pouring out all of your stresses. Your breaths were short and heaved, occasional hiccups bubbling from your lips. Your sobs slowly lulled you closer to sleep, emotional and physical fatigue catching up to you. That is, until you heard the recognizable clang of the door handle hitting against the wooden door.

“Darling,” the accented voice you longed to hear spoke up.

Quickly wiping away your tears and sniffling away any evidence of your sorrow, you stood up, “Tommy!” A feigned smile lay on your supple skin as you ran over to your boyfriend, embracing him in your arms, “What’s up?”

“Are you alright? I’m sorry I didn’t speak up for you during class. I should’ve told that girl to get her hands off you,” he stroked your hair, “She didn’t hurt you, did she?” 

Letting a pained giggle out, you shook your head, “Nope, I’m fine. You know how strong I am.”

“I really, really did want to speak up, but you know that we should keep our relationship under covers, for your sake,” he spoke gently, placing a kiss on your head.

You scowled into his shirt but kept up your cheerful facade, chirping, “Mhm, safety.”

“I knew you’d understand,” he sighed. His hold on you weakened, “I should get going, though. The group will start to wonder where I’ve gone.”

You frowned, pulling away from him.

“Don’t be like that, darling,” he cooed, “I’ll come over tonight. Don’t worry.”

You let out a sarcastic laugh, “Of course, as you always do.”

His brows furrowed at your sudden mood shift, “What are you on, darling?”

“Oh, nothing,” you chirp, hopping back to the tree, collecting your notes and laptop. “Go ahead, meet with your friends. Leave me behind like you always do,” you murmur the last half.

“Love?” His voice neared you, and you barely registered the stray tears betraying you, rolling down your peachy cheeks. 

Quickly bringing up a hand to wipe the wetness away, you keep your back facing Tom.

“Shouldn’t you be going? Don’t want your friends to worry,” you laughed, lightly. A hand placed itself on your shoulder, the sudden contact startling you. “You scared me, Tommy. You shouldn’t do that,” you giggle, hiding your true emotions, “You know how easily scared I am.”

“Darling, can you look at me?” He asked, quietly, concern lacing his tone. 

“What for, Tommy?” You inquired, nervously laughing.

“You’re acting quite… strange,” he explained.

“No need to worry about me, bubs. I’m as peachy as always,” you quipped, shoulders bouncing in emphasis.

“I’m giving you one more chance to turn, or I will do it for you,” he said, sternly. 

You stayed, unmoving, forcing Tom to turn you with his raw strength. At first, you tried to fight it, but you came to the revelation that there was no way you could overpower him.

When you met his warm, liquid eyes, you felt your own tear up, and suddenly, your shoes were an intriguing sight. 

“Baby, please look at me,” he whispered, hands rubbing up and down your arms.

You shook your head in denial, trying to keep your weakness hidden.

“It breaks me to see you this way,” he lifted your face with a finger to your chin. His thumb moved to wipe away your crystal tears.

“Then leave,” you hissed, weakly.

“W-What?” Tom stuttered at the unforeseen reply.

“I’m tired, Tom. I’m tired of hiding, of you ignoring me and me, you. How long are we going to do this? It’s so stupid, all of it,” you dropped your head again, this time of fatigue.

“B-But, you know why we’re doing this-” you cut him off.

“I know, and I can’t help but think that this was a stupid choice,” you motioned between the two of you, “You’re barely around me, and on campus, you don’t even acknowledge me. On the slim chance I do have you to myself, it can only last for so long. At this point, it feels like we’re not even together.”

“I-I don’t understand. What are you trying to say?” Fear filled his eyes as the pit in his stomach became more and more noticeable.

“I think it would be better if-” you stuttered in a breath, “if we took a break.”

“Why? Just because we’re hiding our relationship? You know why I- we chose to keep it secret,” he rushed out his words, hands gripping yours.

“Do I? Do I really? Today was display enough that even though we act like we don’t know each other, I’ll still get harassed by those “fans” of yours. Not to mention, you saw it all unravel, and what did you do? Nothing. There’s no practicality to keeping our relationship hidden because either way, some “fans” will go overboard no matter who the person. Also, I think I showed that I can defend myself from crazy people when I pushed that girl off of me today,” you spoke, ferocity and resentment spurring you on.

“I know I messed up when I didn’t help you, but I thought about our relationship-” you scoffed.

“So what? Even if we weren’t in a relationship, you should’ve helped a girl out. Especially when she’s getting harassed because of you,” you jabbed a finger into his chest.

“Tell me how to make it better. I want to make it better. Don’t end us, please,” he begged, gripping your hand tighter.

“Stop, Tom. I told you that I want to take a break. Besides, it won’t be any different to how our normal relationship is,” you laughed. Pulling your arm out of his grasp, you walked away, “Now, I won’t have to waste any tears on you anymore.”


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