What I Would Give To Feel This Loved - Tumblr Posts

Whatta man, whatta man... 💞💞💞

I've Loved You Forever (2)

Part 1

Masterlist of fan fiction

Fandom: North & South (modern AU)

Pairings: Modern John Thornton x Fem!Reader/Fem!Reader x OC

Warnings: Language, angst, pining.

Summary: It is the Christmas party for John Thornton and his workers from Marlborough Mills. You have all been allowed to take partners, and that means your boyfriend of eighteen months is there. When he is asked if he loves you and can't answer, John Thornton's rage comes out full throttle, especially as he's been in love with you for quite some time.

Comments/Notes: If you wish to be tagged in any of my tag lists for fics or characters, please let me know, and stipulate what you want to be tagged in. I’m gradually removing people from my tag lists who do not interact.

I tend to use Lucas North pictures as my modern Thornton images. This idea actually came to me randomly a few days ago when I was reading on the train.

As soon as you got home that night, after Stuart had dropped you back to your flat, you said farewell to him. Your mind was ablaze with John Thornton, and so much so that Stuart had to call you back for a kiss. The kiss was quick and only a peck. Of course Stuart noticed a difference in it, but he put it down to what he had said earlier that night and just told himself that you would be alright in a few days. Whenever you had a falling out, it didn’t take long for you to get over it. 

John paced his kitchen, his phone in hand. Should he call you? After he had admitted his feelings for you, you had disappeared back into the full pub where your boyfriend was still sat with everyone else. Thoughts and emotions raced. How could he put this right? Had he made a mistake telling you how he felt? The truth was, it would never be a mistake in his mind because he really did love you, more than he could express. Bearing his heart to you would never be a mistake in his eyes, even if your answer wasn’t the one he wished for. 

Suddenly your name flashed on his screen. With a grin and a sigh of relief, he answered the call. 

“John? We need to talk about tonight,” you told him. “I left without telling you where I stand. You shocked me; I’d never got that impression from you at all that you thought anything for me which surpassed friend and colleague.” 

Shit! Where was this going? Were you going to politely reject him? John held his breath. 

“The truth is…” 

John’s heart was pounding so hard now and he gripped his eyes closed, praying with everything inside him that your answer would mirror his confession. 

“The truth is…” you began again. “I…love you, too. I’ve never had anyone tell me they love me, and look me in the eyes and have so much passion there. John, it’s something I’ve always yearned for. And the way you spoke to me earlier, I know I can’t walk away from you. Even when I had all the rough times with Stuart, you were the one who was there in the midst of it all. I miss you already, and I’ve only been away from you about half an hour.” 

“Will you let me come and see you? I need to,” John asked. “Hearing you say this, I need to see you.” 

You sighed. “I want to see you so much, but I need to do the right thing and speak to Stuart first. You do understand, don’t you?” 

“Of course I do. I’d do the same,” John said, still smiling. Even at a time like this, you were faithful and honourable in your relationship with Stuart. 

“I’ll call you as soon as it’s done, John, I promise. I…love you.” Those words felt alien on your lips, but so right. They connected to your heart and your soul. The act of speaking them felt alien, but the place the words came from felt as though you had been born with it in your heart. 

“I love you, too. Goodnight.” 

Your conversation with Stuart got straight to the point, and you initiated it by recalling the events at the pub. “I know we’re not in love, Stuart. Tonight made me see that it’s like that from both sides. We’ve been together for eighteen months and surely something should have started to blossom now and it hasn’t.” 

Stuart chuckled. “And I’m guessing your boss has got something to do with this as well?” 

“Why do you think that?” you asked defensively. 

“It’s obvious he fancies you. The way he snapped at me, and then he followed you outside. I’ve known for a while now that you’ve got feelings for him, and I never said anything. I know we stayed together out of familiarity. We’re too different. When you had hard times, you went to him and not me. I knew a long time ago that you felt something for him.” 

Stuart’s understanding and cooperation shocked you, and for a second you were speechless. 

“John seems a nice bloke, apart from his temper. He’d be good for you like I never was.” 

The call ended with you both saying goodbye to each other and walking away on polite terms. For a few seconds you held your phone in your hand in disbelief, staring at it stupidly. You’d just broken up with your boyfriend of eighteen months and he was okay with it, very okay with it. Had your relationship really been that bad? In the sense that it was too familiar and comfortable.

John was still awake, sat in his living room, scrolling your Instagram page. There was only one photo of you and Stuart. The rest were memes, quotes, childhood photos and holiday pictures. There were even a few of you with your natural beauty hidden beneath a stupid filter. 

Are you still up? The text pinged on his phone. 

Yes. Is everything okay? He asked.

It’s done. You replied.

John couldn’t help but allow his urge to push him to make the call to you again. He sighed as he heard you answer. “It’s done?” he asked, his voice a whisper. 

“This means I’m now single, Mr. Thornton,” you giggled. 

John chuckled. “I was hoping that I could change that in person. But it’s midnight.”

“My door will be open if you get over here in ten minutes.” 

Anticipation raced up your spine and butterflies flapped in your stomach with such ferocity. You watched at your window, until you saw a familiar vehicle pull up outside your maisonette block. A tall figure got out of the car, all veiled in shadow. That walk: you could spot it anywhere and recognise it amongst a dense crowd. 

John reached out to press your bell, but instead was greeted with your face. The door opened swiftly. He couldn’t help but smile at you, falling even more in love with you. He inhaled sharp, and stepped inside the flat. 

Your cheeks flushed bright red as John reached out and cupped your cheek. Then, slowly, he leaned down, being taller, and kissed you softly. Your arms immediately curled up his back and you both sank into the kiss. 

John wound his arms around your waist and pulled you in closer against him, your kiss deepening. 

***

Follow Forever tag list: @lathalea @xxbyimm @linasofia @middleearthpixie @knittastically @guardianofrivendell @luna-xial @meganlpie @eunoiaastralwings @asgardianhobbit98 @rachel1959 @lemond57 @missihart23 @quiall321 @sazzlep @the-fragile-heart-of-a-lady @catthefearless @solairewisteria @aliasauthor @mrsdurin @evenstaredits @glassgulls @littlebird-99 @aliasauthor @court-jobi @heilith @absentmindeduniverse @albionscastle @way-too-addicted-to-fandoms