Withouthonour - Tumblr Posts
@withouthonour asked: ❛ sometimes it is best to leave the thorn in, lest you bleed dry. ❜ from helaena to holly
The first person she's been able to connect to, to open up to, truly, in this place has been Helaena. She's much kinder than her husband had been, especially on the first night they met ( which also happened to be their wedding night, no less ). Their bond grew stronger while the one with Aemond... well she wasn't making much of an attempt at one, were she being honest. The thought of one wrong move terrifies her.
" I do not think the thorn can be plucked. " She admits, arms folded across her chest as she watches out over the city from the window. " Though he's more of a barbed hook than a thorn. "
@withouthonour asked: ❛ where you go, there i will go. where you rest, there i will rest. i will walk behind you every step of the way. ❜ from aemond to holly
From being the man she hated most in the world to the love of her life now was a huge leap. Yet she looks at him like it had always ever been him, because it always only will be him. Even when she's old and gray and he's gone from battle, there wont be another man to fill his space, she would refuse it.
Hands grasp at his, heart pounding, a condition she has grown into since their love blossomed, like a weed that found just the right crack to lay roots in. From being called a bastard wife to him speaking poetry was something to behold, and often times she wonders if it's all just a very vivid dream. One day she may wake up on a bed of straw and in tattered rags but for the moment she'll enjoy it.
" My love, there is no other place I will wander to but your side. There is no need to follow me anywhere, I'll be with you always. "
@withouthonour asked: ❛ nobility is defined by what you do, not who you are. ❜ viserys to holly
" Well, if the King says it, it must be true. " A faulty smile spreads across her cheels as she lowers her head. Eyes find her digits, fidgeting with the frayed thread at the hem of her sleeve. If the King says it, it must be true. GODS how she wants to believe him, so very badly, but even the worst kinds of people are royalty, and the best are sleeping on cobblestone in the rain, starving half to death.
" If you could spread that message t'your people, that'd be wonderful. " From time to time she's still called a bastard, mostly by those who don't believe that bastards can become something great, someone of value. If she had never been legitimized, Holly wouldn't have became someone. If she had never been married into the royal family, she would have never became someone. Though what she does hope those around her will notice is how kind she is, how she treats the servants, and the small folk out on the streets. The children who are, like she once was, bastards.
@withouthonour asked: ❛ You are wiser than I believed you to be. ❜ otto to holly
" I tend to uphold that belief in a lot of people. " It hurts, cuts deep, to think that they all thought of her as a stupid girl. Well, maybe she is, maybe she even has herself fucking fooled. At the time it was more about survival. Shit, it still is, but in a whole other way.
" I am kind, but do not take it as a weakness. " It is, it's her biggest flaw. Too kind in a world that has no room for such frivolities. Though, as weak as she truly is, Holly is certain her husband will stand by her no matter what.
@withouthonour asked: ❛ i know how to keep my life and my crown. and i will. ❜ rhaenyra for karcis
Chest rises, the sound of metal armor scraping against itself fills the silence between them. How long had he been at her side ?? For years, he thinks. At least five and ten of them. He watched her grow into a fierce leader, and her brothers sprout from nothing. And what he wouldn't give his life for to see this Targaryen on the throne.
" I hope so, my Queen. " He says. He wants to reach out, to touch her hand, and feel the warmth of her skin- but he declines the thought as quickly as it had made its purchase in his mind. " For all ours, and the kingdom's sake. And I will stop at nothing to get you seated upon that throne. "
@withouthonour asked: ❛ I understand the order of things. I’m not sure you do. ❜ alicent to karcis
" I understand quite well, Your Grace. " Brows raise as there is a nod in agreeance to his own words. He had always upheld formalities, though it is no secret who his loyalties lay with. It definitely was not her, GODS no. Karcis is truly under the belief that Viserys truly wants Rhaenyra on the throne, though he knows tradition calls for a male heir. Though speaking on his mind might result in... permanent termination. He'll keep those thoughts to himself.
" The rightful heir sits on the throne upon the kings death. " The words were almost spat out at her, each syllable enunciated, each word emphasized to hit home with his point. He hoped it had, but even if it hadn't, he did not care. The one thing he cared about most was making sure Rhaenyra got what was truly hers.
@withouthonour asked: ❛ how can i leave you to wolves such as these? ❜ rhaenyra to karcis
" I am not scared of these fools. " A grin spreads wide across his face, pupils dilate, happy to see her. Of course he would be, no other woman on the face of this planet brings him great joy such as she had. Although she is just an arms length away, he feels as though they are oceans apart. His happiness is only temporary.
" Let them think they have the upper hand on me and see what happens. "
@withouthonour asked: ❛ we have a similar spirit, you know? ❜ alicent to holly
To be associated with a bastard, Holly had thought, was above her. Maybe it was the way everyone else looked at her since she had arrived, the laughing from Aegon, the sneering from Aemond, Otto looking at her like he was belittling her. The only one who seemed to care for her being there was Viserys. Helaena seemed to be warming up. But nothing about herself screamed Alicent.
Holly swallows, lips parting just ever so slightly as if to speak up, but it's choked down at the thought. She doesn't even know what to say that wouldn't upset the Queen. Hands press to her growing stomach, almost as if to hug herself. Holly wants to cry, for her youth, for the situation she was forced into.
" How so ?? "
@withouthonour asked: ❛ i … i have struggled with nightmares. ❜ from aemond to holly
Hands clasp over his, holding them tight. Thumbs stroke his skin gently, reassuringly. Holly, too, struggles with them, though she doubts they're of the same subject as his... that doesn't make her think any less of him however. Even the greatest men in history have night terrors, she's sure of it.
A small pat is given, followed by a sweet smile. Though she had never imagined they'd ever get this sweet and gentle with each other, it does not bother her to do so now.
" I'm sure the Grand Maester has something for that. He seems to have a remedy for everything. "
@withouthonour askd: ❛ come, i rarely bite and i never leave a mark. ❜ from aegon to holly
Chest rises, heart beating inside it so harshly Holly thought it might burst out of her chest. Were she to deny the King, well, she didn't hardly want to think about what would happen. Aegon had been known for being a dog, and she just hopes he wouldn't do that to his brother.
Digits gather her skirts as she lifts enough to step over, sitting next to Aegon. Hands smooth out the fabric that sit atop her lap before clasping together. In Holly's experience, he does bite. And hard, at that.
" I would hope you wouldn't bite at all, your Grace. "
@withouthonour asked: ❝ i may not regret my actions, but i do regret that they were necessary. ❞ alicent to holly
Her stepmother reminds her a lot of her own mother. In ways she can't even describe how so, but the one thing that makes this woman better than Rose is the remorse, the fact that she apologizes for things. Holly's mother would never, she thinks the world owes HER an apology. And for what ?? She owes the world an apology for adding to the bastard population, if you ask Holly.
" Most things are out of our control. " Being women in this day and age, even if she was the queen, there was still only so much she could do. " I understand, though. You did what you had to do, your Grace. "
@withouthonour asked: ❛ you do not have to look to the past to know who you are. who you can be. ❜ satin to holly
Brows furrow at his comment. As much as she would love to believe him, there's something about it, something about the world that they live in that doesn't allow her to believe in that. Though Holly would not judge others in the way everyone else seems to.
" I get it. Being a bastard shouldn't define us, but when everyone else feels like it should, somethin' that we didn't ask for, it makes it hard t'find your way in the world, y'know ?? "
TRUE, no one can outrun death. It will happen one day, though he hopes it's a day far, far away from this one, when he's almost a hundred years old, has had a good life, and in the arms of Rhaenyra, his beautiful wife. Though dreams still remain dreams for this man, he will never get what he wants. No, in fact his fate is already sealed at the hands of the Greens kingsguard.
Chest rises with a deep inhale, a smile spreading even further on his lips. He would offer his hand, and kiss hers, were she to accept. Though he takes his post too seriously. Maybe he should lighten up a little- after all, how is he to make her his bride if he doesn't ??
" I am going no where, my Queen. Not unless you wish it, not unless I am forced. "
"no, i imagine you are not." she manages a sliver of a smile in return for his grin. she fears more for anyone who dares face karcis, this much is true, for she knows no one can match his prowess with a sword. it does not stop her from worrying and fearing all those unlikely outcomes as even a well-skilled man can still be harmed. she would be lost without him at her side, without him near as her closest confidant and protector. yet the truth is, he is always far from her; always out of reach because of their stations and his oath.
"you are more honourable than they will ever be. i fear it means i will lose you." as she lost laenor and harwin.