Part Of The Reason I Love How Bell Hooks Talks About Masculinity Is That She Shows Real Compassion Towards

part of the reason i love how bell hooks talks about masculinity is that she shows real compassion towards men suffering from the effects of toxic masculinity. she was conscious of how we need to unlearn the ways we talk about men + masculinity just as much as we need to unlearn the same for women + femininity. so many times ill see someone talking about toxic masculinity like (hyperbolizing here but only slightly) "these FUCKING STUPID BABY BITCHES won't MAN UP and go to a therapist!!!" and like. i get the anger. but you see feminists recreating patriarchal manhood by only promoting good behaviors through patriarchal frameworks. any use of the term "real men" is bad because it reifies the idea that manhood is a special title you must earn, and it is something possible to fail and fake. & as important as it is to promote sexual equality + the pleasure of non-cis-men, lots of people are essentially still working with the idea that men need sexual prowess to have worth but just shifting it slightly so there is more emphasis on women's pleasure. but I want cis men to think about their partners' pleasure because they care about their partners, not because they need to check a box in order to keep their man card. and don't get me started on small dick jokes– and the absolutely pitiful excuse people will use that "well, I don't believe it, but misogynistic men get upset when I say it, so it's okay!"

basically bell hooks is so fucking right. in order to create loving men we need to love men, simply for being alive, whether or not they are performing. as much as we need to actively unlearn misogyny (and we do), it's equally vital we unlearn patriarchal ways of seeing manhood. we can't just assume that taking a feminist perspective automatically means there is no work to be done there.

i nominate laios touden dungeon meshi for white boy of the month, nay white boy of the year

I know we all joke about Izutsumi (Izutsumi) but I do think she represents an important aspect just like the other members of the part and that’s Self Advocation.

She was kept from making her own choices for herself for a long ass time, most of her life if not all of it I’d wager. And now??? Even for survival she’s not going to do it if she wants. She wasn’t going to eat those dumplings just because she’d had them too much until Senshi took a chance with a changeling ring. And even after agreeing to help her and travelling in the dungeon a bit, Izutsumi just wandered off after the dire wolves showed up. Because she wanted to.

So if different characters can act as voices in your head for things, like Chilchuck with your rights as a worker, let Izutsumi give you permission to advocate for yourself.

If a doctor isn’t listening, be firmer and clearer. If you don’t want to be somewhere, find a way to leave. You want to learn a new skill but people have doubts, fuck them and try. People complain about you being a picky eater? Fuck em again, why shouldn’t you eat things you like?

Unless it’s something you kind of Have to do, make sure you’re putting yourself first. And if you have to do it but don’t want to, do it in a way that’s better for you.

Think of Izutsumi, would she put up with that bullshit??? Don’t put up with more than you’re willing to

A Laios thought.

The two times we see him lash out is when people accuse him of not prioritizing his sister.

Or….

Why are there so. many. FedEx ads. Tagged as them?/?

Button pins my beloved ❤️