"I Might Count That As A Murder Attempt," You Gasped For Air.

"I might count that as a murder attempt," you gasped for air.

She couldn't help it. She couldn't control it. She couldn't stop it. Everytime you were around, Keyleth's clumsiness would just spike. Accidently coking you with her vines ? Done. Almost burning you ? Done. Almost making you fall from the top of a cliff ? Done. Today was sadly not an exception. The poor dear unfortunately pushed you in a barrel full of beer. Not any barrel. The biggest barrel in the tavern. Fortunately for you, you did not drown.

"I'm so so so so so sorry !" she apologized, her cheeks gaining more colors than her hair.

You sighed again and managed to exit the barrel, drenched in alcohol. Your clothes were wet and smelled like liquor.

"It's okay," you hummed calmly. "Let's just not tell Grog that I'm now booze-flavored."

You accepted the towel she handed you with a grateful smile. Keyleth felt so bad, now. What did you think of her ? Did you see her as a burden ? Did you even see her as a friend ? Would you want someone like her close to you ? Was she even worthy of your presence ? How could she—

"Hey," your voice lightened the obscurity of her overthinking. "Could you please help me get rid of the beer on my skin and find new clothes ?"

This simple request blew away any shadow of doubt. You weren't mad at her. And you trusted her. Her back straightened as she nodded with energy.

"Of course ! I'm so sorry again."

"It's fine, Keyleth. Really," you smiled reassuringly at her.

How adorable. Her clumsiness could be a deadly weapon for sure, but in your mind slightly drowsy because of the alcohol, you couldn't help but find her lovely. You internally wished she could see herself like you admired her.

Fellas, once again, I ask your aid to denounce @ aeyumiicore for stealing other people's work.

It might not seem important, it might not affect you, but if you're one of the many who has written through your life fanfiction over one of your personal fixation I believe you can feel the anger when seeing someone having their work, their time, and their whole personality stolen.

All I ask is for you guys to reblog this. Let's do our best to maintain this fanbase clean and healthy for us, and for future players who might even become our colleagues and friends in fanfiction.

I won't write too much, I'll just drop their video screen I did.

Please be aware that this might happen to your work or one of your friends' work! Spread awareness!!

Don't forget to support the real writer, too! @aeyumicore ✊🏽 (love you, pookie, please rest).

Omen could be spooky. Master of shadows and teleportation, ambush expert and underestimated strategist. An air of authority and superiority radiated from each of his movements. He was a very estimated agent of the protocol, respected by all, and a very feared oppenent on the field.

Who would have thought that his room would be so cozy ?

"How the hell did you manage to have a fireplace in here ?"

"I have my ways," he answered casually.

He was calmly knitting, sat on a rocking chair but you also had his attention. His bed was carefully made but you doubted he ever used it. Some bonsai trees were put on some shelves as well as some books, and the room was only illuminated by the dim but warm light of the fire. You kept looking around and —was that Dizzy sleeping in the corner ?— noticed the book you recommended to him a few days ago on his bed table.

"Can I help you with something ?" he suddenly asked, exiting you from your daze.

You blinked, looked back at him then cleared your throat.

"Uhm...I came to give your knife back," you said as you handed him the weapon. "Thanks again. It was truly useful for yesterday's mission."

Dizzy raised her head slightly to take a look at you, then decided to changes spot to rest on the pillows of the bed instead.

You saw the three stripes of the wraith's face slightly dilating, as if he was observing you better. Unbeknownst to you, your presence had the odd ability to soothe him. Everytime you were around, Omen found himself feeling more stable. You also amused him. He found the surprise in your eyes as you looked around adorable.

He nodded and invited you to sit down on the bed.

"You seem tired," he said calmly.

You avoided his gaze and started to fidget your fingers. You took a deep breath then slowly released it.

"I'm not tired."

"Exhausted then ?" he hummed as he momentarily stopped knitting.

He always observed you, silently watching over you. He started to worry when he saw you weakening. He felt you less lively than usual, more tired, too feeble and too hardworking.

"That's..." you sighed and looked down on your lap. "That's one way to put it."

"Don't overwork yourself," he said firmly "Rest."

His words felt like there were on the tight line between a request and an order. You sighed, feeling yourself weakening even more under the intensity of his gaze. You lied down on the bed —like you thought, the bed was barely used— and your eyelids started to feel heavier.

"I recommend you stop going on mission until you feel better," he murmured, his voice had a soothing effect that embrace your ears in a warm embrace.

Your already frail resolve shattered at his words. You felt Dizzy nuzzling against you as sleep slowly took you away. He watched you fall asleep and resumed his knitting. Several hours passed and you still shared a quiet and cozy moment. Even though you were unconscious, you had never felt as relaxed as you did now. You internally thanked Omen.

And Omen internally thanked you. For finally taking care of yourself, and for your company.

Needless to say that you started spending a lot of time in his dorm. He helped you rest, and you helped him feeling more stable.

Vax'ildan was a very flirty guy. But it was even worse the rare times he managed to get drunk. Added to that a spark of clinginess and you could barely breathe nor move around.

"Vax, I can't move."

He held you in a bear hug, his grip tightening even more when you tried to move away from his embrace. His face nuzzled in your neck, he took deep breaths and just whined when you tried to escape again.

"You don't need to move, love," he mumbled as he suddenly lifted you. "I'll move for you."

Now you felt like you were being kidnapped in a very cuddly way. He was already insufferable when sober, it seemed like alcohol only worsened that trait in him.

"Vax'ildan, release me or I'll tell your sister !" you huffed as you kept struggling in his arms.

"Tell her what ?" he chuckled. "That I'm enjoying some quality with the love of my life ? Trust me she doesn't want to hear the details."

He pressed a loud kiss on your cheek and started to walk away with you still locked in his arms.

"Or I'll tell her about the time a snake almost bit your—"

He suddenly cut you off by putting a large hand over your mouth, his eyes glaring at you with a very faint heat.

"You wouldn't dare."

"Mmmf-mmm-hmmhmmph ?" you squinted your eyes at him.

He took his hand off your lips and raised an eyebrow.

"What ?"

"Is it a challenge ?" you repeated.

He stared at you with a few long minutes, his eyes dazy and his cheeks even more flushed. His gaze looked down at your lips for a second then back at your eyes. His eyes were saying a monologue that could not be translated into words.

"Do you know how hot you are ?" he murmured.

You blinked then dodged his lips.

"Okay," you huffed, finally managing to escape his embrace. "Time for you to go to bed."

You grabbed his wrist and led him towards the bedrooms of the inn, ignoring the hurt-puppy eyes and his pout as he whined a long inebriated speech about 'not being that drunk' and about 'how he deserves hugs and kisses'. You loved Vax'ildan from the bottom of your heart, but he was sometimes too much to bear when drunk. You felt like you turned into a Teddy bear in the grip of a sleepless child.

Once in the bedroom, you didn't even have time to exit the room that he immediately grabbed you by the waist and dragged you to bed with him.

"You're not going anywhere, love," he murmured while nuzzling his nose in your neck. "You're sleeping in my arms tonight."

You muttered a light curse and forfeited. But you swore yourself to scold him heavily in the morning.

"You're writing fanfictions about us ?" you asked, your eyes widening in surprise.

Clove started to giggle like the maniacal pixie that they were as their fingers played with some random dice. You sat down on their bed as your eyes traveled on the words written in their notebook.

"So, what do you think ?" they asked, leaning towards you.

"I think that your imagination is somewhat frightening," you chuckled lightly and turned a page. "You even did illustrations !?"

Their smile only widened at your words as you admired their arts. The crazyness and passion baked onto these pages resulted in a chaotic and sparkly madness that was a beautiful representation of Clove's peculiar mind. The fact that they took the time to fill a complete notebook full of scenarios where the agents of the protocol were the main characters still baffled you. You were even among the pages living crazy adventures.

"Clove, darling, my dear Scottish stardust pixie," you sighed in a very dramatic way. "I don't know if I want to expose this in a museum or hide it from everyone's eyes."

"Well, I'm pretty sure Cypher already saw it," they hummed. "His eyes are literally everywhere."

Clove leaned a bit closer to you, the mischief in their eyes sparkling like lost stars bathing in an ancient ocean.

"The reason I showed you this is because I wanted to live a scenario that I wrote about us two."

"Hm ?" your eyebrows raised slightly. "Which one ?"

They bit their lower lip to silent their laughter as they turned the pages of the notebook. Your eyes then fell on the scenario they meant. As your read the lines, your eyes widened and your face flushed. Maniacal butterflies took ownership of your stomach and time released your brain from its hold. Your voice was stolen from you as your astounded gaze fell on a very graphic illustration of Clove and you.

"Damn," you murmured after a moment of silence.

Their nose scrunched in mirth at your loudly silent flusteredness. They mentally took a picture of your face to redraw it later.

"So ? What do you say ?"

d&d / fantasy valorant

has been on my brain. so here’s my little masterlist on what i think everyone would be.

DISCLAIMER

i’ve played d&d like three times so don’t expect all of these to be accurate/they’re my opinion :(

astra // astral elf monk

hey, i just think it makes sense. monks can deal damage and since astra derives her power from the astral guardians, it makes sense, no?

plus, i think she’d be really badass with astral elf genes…

breach // centaur barbarian

WALK WITH ME HERE. just listen to me. A CENTAUR. HE’S SO CENTAUR.

he’s very tanky and i think it very much fits his whole vibe— and if you think he’s annoying with two legs, he’s gonna be ten times more annoying with four. can totally see him absolutely destroying someone by bucking his back legs into someone.

brimstone // dwarf paladin

honor is huge for dwarves and i really want to play that in with brimstone. i want to say that kingdom could’ve been this crazy god thing but maybe i could look into that later. all i know is that he is a paladin with a heart of gold.

in a little doodle i did, i made him a tavernkeeper… so maybe he’s an ex-paladin now-turned a humble tavernkeep.

chamber // high elf artificer

i wanted to make him a ranger, but an artificer makes me giggle. probably because one of my d&d characters is an artificer and was loosely based on chamber. (she’s a rich tiefling seamstress of many talents, if you even care.) also you can imagine chamber as a tiefling too, but, i think high elf works better.

deffo still a weapons designer, maybe even a blacksmith. probably works closely with magic users to make custom weaponry to channel their mana in.

clove // fairy bard

look, as much as i’d LOVE to make clove an immortal god watching over the whole fantasy world, i just HAVE to include them as a fairy who CONTINUOUSLY breaks the 4th wall. it’s so funny.

clove would probably have DEADPOOL level fourth wall breaks, and constantly make jokes and references of ‘the real world’ and how they’ve ‘seen all of you before.’

cypher // tiefling wizard

WALK WITH ME HERE. he had his horns ripped off. WALK WITH ME.

he hides his identity partially because iirc tieflings aren’t exactly … liked by the public eye? i also like to think he uses his wizardry to fuel his whole information broker schtick. he uses arcane eye and everyone hates him for it.

deadlock // snow elf beast hunter

i know that beast hunters aren’t exactly a CLASS but come on. lets be honest with ourselves.

deadlock who lost her team to a rabid mythical beast, now dedicating herself to hunting them down and neutralizing them, one bounty at a time. i like to think that she doesn’t necessarily kill them if they can be saved, or at least put them down painlessly. otherwise, she aims for the fuckin’ throat.

fade // half-elf sorcerer

walk with me here. fade is a MAN in the universe OKAY walk with me. i made a hc video on tiktok where i made fade a half-elf sorcerer that is haunted by the voices in his spellbook. his character name is demir, and upon further research, i have found out that sorcerers CANNOT use spellbooks. (stupid, i know.) so work with that as you will.

i think she works for nightmare to feed it in return to find information on her father. she's a bounty hunter, but ONLY for nightmares and for information. you feel me?

gekko // tall-man druid

i think this one’s a given.

i’m practically making him beast boy, BUT IDGAF!!!! he has a connection with his buddies and often shifts as needed. he likes turning into a dog and cuddling. trust. his character name is oetam. yes, it's mateo backwards.

harbor // warforged artificer

this one is kind of me fucking around. as much as i wanted to make him a water based race, he was chosen to hold the artifact.

i think he was made by realm to be their historian and antiquities expert, but as soon as he was the chosen one, was shut out, just like in the cinematic.

iso // half-orc fighter

i know i could've put iso as a tiefling or something like that but i think him as a half-orc is cooler. he's tall, bulky, and TANKY.

i originally wanted him to be a paladin, because he could change oaths from hourglass to the protocol through a huge quest in sparing omen... that whole thing, but i think a fighter works better.

jett // air genasi rogue

let's be so fucking for real JETT WILL BE PUT ON SOME ROGUE SHIT WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT. I WILL FORCE FEED IT TO YOU WITH A GOLDEN SPOON.

if omega earth isn't canonical in the d&d world (which i highly doubt) she has an evil twin that does shit on her name, henceforth, she has to hide. otherwise, same backstory.

kay/o // warforged fighter

HE. IS. WARFORGED. [actively shoving food down your throat]

very much strikes me as a robot learning how to be normal. definitely works along brimstone-- he got a job at the tavern and helps him sort out bounties and act as security. he's also totally a bodyguard for money.

killjoy // tiefling artificer

she's so tiefling u can't say anything. she's a PINK tiefling thank you very much. definitely a party girl, too!

i think she's the same idea as chamber, but she's paid by brimstone! i wanna think he took her in as his protégé but atp he might as well be hers. initially he wanted her to help with kay/o, but she just ended up control-freaking everywhere and upgrading everything in sight. she has matching names with oetam. it's aralk.

neon // wood elf ranger

neon is a speedster, so it makes sense to give her one of the fastest races in d&d (based on walking distance, at least). i wanna think she's a knight... stay with me here.

ex-k-sec makes sense for her to be a knight? so maybe she just has the title, but kind of just does contract work? also! the whole lightning thing... mayhaps cursed? or maybe just a lightning god didn't want her. choose which one you like out of those two.

omen // tall man-tiefling rogue

hear me out; he used to be a tall man, but after the whole 'incident' was turned into a tiefling. LISTEN BRO IT MAKES SENSE.

he works as a merc, sporting a cloak to shield his 'hideous' self. he frequents brimstone's tavern for jobs, and always emerges from the shadows instead of using the door. he's become accustomed to showing up after closing with the bounty, and in return, spooks everyone working there. killjoy had to hit her fantasy equivalent of an inhaler after a few spooks.

phoenix // dragonborn bard

[shoveling food down your throat] that is a fucking dragonborn if i ever did fucking see one.

and, he's a bard because he was in theatre school, duh. i like to think phoenix is a very popular entertainer but also uses his talents for other jobs on the side. otherwise... maybe he's a knight! i don't know. i like the performer idea better.

raze // dwarf alchemist

she was also in the d&d video! her name is razinho ('little raze' haha). probably a merc with a very, err, explosive personality. wandered in the tavern a lot and hit it off with aralk.

if i had to assign her a class, maybe a fighter or a barbarian.

reyna // vampire warlock

listen. i want to say that the vampire side of her is empress. she has to devour souls (or blood!) to keep empress happy. you see where i'm going here? [fade bulletin board spray]

she's tied to empress so long as lucia is sick. gekko and her met after she found him injured in dog form... guys please i love them so much.

sage // high elf cleric

her healing is a gift. come on bro. she's as cleric as it can get. while i think she also derives power from the earth (she's in fact a geomancer) i think the majority of her mana comes from the higher power that gifted her.

i want to think she also works as a ... well, sage. she does so back in shaanxi. otherwise, she's found at brimstone's tavern providing her healing. sometimes she goes into dungeons and does free revivals.

skye // dryad druid

[shoveling food down your throat] dryad skye [more food] druid skye. also isn't it crazy how THAT is the only skye picture we have. rest in peace.

i wanna think that her pack is a bunch of animal-shaped plants that she helped escape a garden. i think that's really funny. 10+ points if it's a garden belonging to kingdom.

sova // avian (owl) scout

a former knight in charge of reconnaissance. he left after a tragic accident.

he lives with his babushka and takes care of her-- sometimes he takes up bounties for extra cash, and brimstone is trying to work his way into sova's good side-- he could really use a scout.

viper // naga shifter alchemist

probably used to be a cleric but renounced her belief-- even better, after doing what she did to omen, she lost her power and took it as a sign to take up researching death.

yes, she is a naga. it makes so much sense, nobody talk to me. her and brimstone are old friends and she frequents the bar also because of omen. the reason he was sent to kill her should stay the same i think.

yoru // changeling rogue

last one! he was also in the hc video. except he was a fighter. his name is kurayami. no, not kuronami. he's a runaway samurai and hella edgy. oetam bullies him. demir, too.

changelings can impersonate people they've already seen, so maybe yoru uses paintings of his ancestors to decide on his identity. he has the mask still, too! he uses it when he's on his rogue shit.

thanks for reading! would love to hear what you guys think about these!

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