ataraxiaspainting - i just want your love, so don't waste my time...
i just want your love, so don't waste my time...

☾ ( she / her ) ( panromantic asexual ) ☽ . . ♡︎( 18+ only please ) ♥︎ ( dark content + fluff ) ♥︎ ( 18 ) ♥︎ ( infj ) ♥︎ ( aya )

557 posts

List Some Facts About Yourself! Don't Be Shy! :D

List some facts about yourself! Don't be shy! :D

OMG ANON... THANK YOU SO MUCH! i hope you always sleep comfy, and nothing ever gets in your eyes!

-> somehow i managed to get through high school in one of the top scholars' programs, become popular, and even have my own fanclub that was recognized by even the principal. it was called "the aya fanclub society" and three of my best friends were the president, queen, and king respectively. ah. those were the days. making even the straightest girls gay for me. i never really dated anyone though? i think i'm just too picky when it comes to relationships, despite everyone wanting a piece of me back then lol. i felt like hannah montana having a double life.

-> i'm a the creme shop fanatic. i love cute stuff and their products are very good on my skin! i often also find them discounted so i can save a little coin. i've never really had a breakout ever since i started using the brand two(ish) years ago. (please do not use their products if you are allergic though!)

-> my favorite shirts ever are this mindflayer shirt i got off amazon AND OFFICAL MITSKI MERCH I GOT AT HER CONCERT THIS YEAR! my older sister spent a fortune, but she was happy i was happy. smiles are worth more than gold sometimes.

-> as a thirteen-year-old i had really big crushes on the dilf type characters from DC. deathstroke. ra's al ghul. vandal savage. lex luthor somehow???

-> my comfort movies are la la land, batman (1989), the aristocats, legally blonde, the wailing, the lego batman movie, heathers: the musical (even though it may not count as a movie), little women (2019), coraline, kubo and the two strings, kiki's delivery service, howl's moving castle, and ponyo. horror/thriller movies always somehow influence my life EOFNORNFCRORNFRK.

-> i actually dislike sweetened drinks. my friends are always shocked when i tell them that. i like my coffee black. i like my tea unsweetened with no milk or anything. one of my online friends said "you not liking sweet drinks goes against everything i know about you" and i think that sums up the effect pretty well. i... also don't really like chocolate or ice cream. sorry.

-> my favorite colors are black, pink, and green! as for my least favorite... yellow, orange, and brown. just... no.

-> i play multiple instruments! electric violin, acoustic guitar (a gift from my late grandpa), and some piano. i also am a black belt in tae kwon do... if that counts for anything o-o


More Posts from Ataraxiaspainting

10 months ago

congratulations on 300 followers!

Can i request a fic of yandere Lord Sesshomaru (Inuyasha) where reader braids flowers into his hair?

Please and thanks! Love your writing <3

i'm sorry for you waiting so long, anon!!!

Lycoris.

Yan Sesshomaru x GN Reader. 

Synopsis: A bit of pessimism is wise when dealing with the demon lord that is essentially attached to your hip.

Warnings: Yandere themes, kidnapping/unhealthy relationships, and mentions of violence (not against the reader).

Word Count: 700.

*~*~*~*

Your legs felt like they couldn’t stand back up however much you wanted them to. If you could have something that you and you alone wanted in your now mundane life. You don’t have a permanent home anymore; the only things attempting to resemble such a thing are places where Lord Sesshomaru tells you you can rest up. But here the grass almost felt soft and the breeze wasn’t too cold.

But here Lord Sesshomaru looks almost relaxed. 

His eyes are half closed and his hands rest on his white robes. It seems there is still some distance between them though, because there didn’t seem to be any noteworthy wrinkles across the stainless fabric.

In your hands, which would have rested too if the demon did not request them to work again, lies Lord Sesshomaru’s soon-to-be second most prized moment of his lifetime – a long braid made of his hair going down from his neck to his lower back.

“Should I… forage some flowers to decorate your hair, my lord?”

He doesn’t answer. Instead he blinks as he stares up at the cloudless sky. Slowly but surely though, he shakes his head.

“Understood.”

That is what you have been trained to say throughout the months you spend being forced to cling to Lord Sesshomaru’s side. If he was busy, he entrusted Jaken to watch over you – even though the servant wasn’t a quarter as powerful as him, he still had the capabilities to take on armies by himself.

You obey his orders just as well as Lord Sesshomaru’s, unless the two had differing viewpoints. If so, you picked Sesshomaru over him every time. After all…

After all, who is the full fledged demon who can slaughter villages in mere seconds? Who has poison in his sharp nails that has enough toxin to paralyze someone faster than they can blink or is acidic enough to dissolve their bones? Certainly not you.

So you endure most things that come with being Lord Sesshomaru’s teammate. If that role is what you are and not some poor traveler he stumbled upon in the middle of a heavy thunderstorm, that is.

He dislikes it when you say you are essentially held captive. But he still does nothing to stop you. Perhaps he simply doesn’t care? You hope so, sometimes. But sometimes you don’t; because while Lord Sesshomaru hasn’t shown any animosity towards you whatsoever, if he simply didn’t care about what you did and said that means he can easily get rid of you.

He can easily kill you.

“My lord?”

Once more, he doesn’t respond.

Is it best to ask again?

“My lord?”

The silence does nothing to change itself – Lord Sesshomaru does nothing to change his posture or to change his attitude or to change himself.

From the bushes behind you, you hear something shuffle among the blades of grass, the fallen tree leaves, and the berries that litter the thorny ground.

A familiar cackling – it’s Jaken; and most likely Rin following him from behind.

“My lord! I got as you requested, my lord!”

For the first time since the moment you four all stopped for a break, Lord Sesshomaru turned his neck around. You can swear that you heard the bones crack within.

He looks at Rin first and not the basket of flowers Jaken holds, a small smile on his lips.

“Did you have fun?” He asks, his voice as gentle as when he speaks to you when you are near asleep. 

She nods.

“I am glad.”

After a few more seconds of waiting for his lord to take the plants he foraged, Jaken places the basket next to your sat on knees. If Lord Sesshomaru wasn’t this close, you are certain that Jaken would have murmured curses under his breath.

Rin falls back asleep as soon as she leans on a tree nearby. Jaken follows her example.

“Shall we start?” Lord Sesshomaru asks. 

Hearing Rin’s snores makes you much more relaxed than before. So, you smile as you nod.


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10 months ago

Blade has loved before, centuries ago.

The memories faded away into dust. The positive emotions he felt then became foreign. Joy, pride, attraction. These feelings aren't of any use to someone whose only purpose is to serve as a blade.

It's only when he met you that they began to reappear.

When you giggle at something, there’s a strange fuzzy feeling in his chest. When you compliment him, the tips of his ears suddenly feel hot. Tugging him along somewhere with your hand in his will have his hand burn with the touch of yours, even when you already let go.

It takes him weeks of brooding to understand that these sensations are affection. He didn't believe it at first; he had deemed himself incapable and unworthy of feeling anything like that ever again. But the more he lingers on the thought, the more he thinks it to be reasonable.

He stops disliking the way his heart races in your presence. He doesn’t mentally berate himself anymore for going along with the trips and outings you want to take him on. Kafka’s teasing doesn’t affect him now, because he’s already made peace with his fondness for you. During night time, he no longer stays awake contemplating what type of relationship with you he truly desires.

These feelings haven't been felt by him for generations. They make him feel alive. You make him feel alive.


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10 months ago

do you have a chrollo bible lol

i wish... though technically chrollo is evil jesus or something? a lot of religious themes going on with the rat man...

Do You Have A Chrollo Bible Lol

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10 months ago
If Chrollo Ever Looked At My Youtube History He'd Probably Wonder If My Currently Prescribed Medicine

if chrollo ever looked at my youtube history he'd probably wonder if my currently prescribed medicine is actually enough


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10 months ago

chrollo is king

Chrollo Is King

this is supposed to be a lion king reference...


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