Not A Prompt, I Wanted To Ask You And Your Followers How Tf To Write Romance Without Making It Really

Not a prompt, I wanted to ask you and your followers how tf to write romance without making it really sappy

Hi :)

Here is a link for showing love without telling.

How to write romance

Love at first sight: this rarely ever really happens. Think of it more like interested in or attracted to each other at first sight. You can let your characters fall in love easily, but real love between them would still take some time and a lot of good writing.

Connection: it’s all about the connection between your characters. The bond between them is what makes the romance realistic and keeps the reader interested and invested. For this connection to develop you need to know your characters very well. You need to know their flaws and their strengths and what they admire in another person and maybe what they don’t like about themselves. And then you can start their connection. They can feel attraction for each other for different reasons in the beginning.

A few things they can be attracted to:

looks

humor

wit

intelligence

charm

kindness

independence

strength

This depends on your characters and what they would admire in a partner. But as we established, a connection needs to be deeper than a spark of attraction. The characters need to bond with each other and build trust and sometimes grow into the person they need to be for this relationship.

You can show this by writing scenes in which they:

learn more about each other

have to do or face something together

see each other’s flaws and come to accept them

show each other what they really enjoy

see the other person with the person’s friends or family and how they act with them

help and support each other

be vulnerable together

see the other person let loose

Drama: Friede, Freude, Eierkuchen* (love, peace, and harmony) – it’s neither realistic nor interesting. Every couple fights about something or has their ups and downs. There is also the matter of outside influences that can create conflict. Don’t shy away from drama, but also be careful how you do it. In romance it’s important to not cross the line, where it’s just not realistic or healthy anymore for the characters to get romantically involved. You need to find the right balance. That being said...

Stay away from negative behavior: to be realistic, a character needs to have flaws and it’s important to show them. But if you want your readers to fall in love with the romance in your story, you should stay away from tropes that make for an unhealthy relationship. Writing abuse as romantic can be very dangerous for your readers.

Examples of an unhealthy relationship:

unwanted advances/harassment (physical or other)

emotional manipulation

extreme possessiveness or jealousy

extreme dependence on partner (emotional or other)

verbal or physical abuse

Partnership: people do not all come from the same background and in a lot of places and situations people will be put into hierarchies. But even if they are not equal in some aspects of their lives, they should always be equal partners in their relationship with mutual respect, trust and understanding.

Sharing commonalities: while a romance needs some conflict and the characters need to see their differences and accept, love or overcome them, it wouldn’t be a lasting relationship if they don’t have a few things in common. Make sure that before they commit to each other that they are on the same page with the most important things, like opinions, habits or ideologies that the other person couldn’t accept or live with.

Happily ever after: like I said, it’s not realistic to always be happy. But when you finally write about your characters coming together and bringing well-deserved closure to their romance, leave the reader with the feeling that it will last. They witnessed how your characters got to know each other, their flaws and strengths, they overcame conflict together, they grew and learned from each other. After all this they want to leave the beautiful romance with a good feeling.

Good luck with your writing!

- Jana

(*actual translation: peace, joy, pancake)