-Sleeping In The Forrest-

-Sleeping in the Forrest- 

“i went to the forest to bathe my soul”

The Three Dragons, or, Repentence, Revelry, and the Hero Resolve (a tale of Onde)

So when I offered to go telling stories from my D&D game the other, I got several votes for the elves, and I wrote that one out, but several people were also very interested in the dragons, and, well.  The Hero Resolve is one of my very favorite not-technically-a-god-but-honestly-might-as-well-be NPCs in this game, and making up folklore for a world that doesn’t exist is pretty damn awesome, so–

Once upon a time, there were three evil dragons.

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OK OK OK but in re: this AU I wrote about this morning. 

Imagine: Vader, an idiot, exchanges letters with this mysterious person (who is obviously Obi-Wan) for like, years. Obi-Wan, of course, is a lonely hermit at this time, and Full of Regrets About Things Left Unsaid, and figures A) Anakin is probably never going to figure out who he is anyways, B) no one’s ever going to read these stupid letters, and so C) even though Romance and being extremely over the top about feelings about whatnot is not really Obi-Wan’s jam, damnit, he’s not going to leave anything else unsaid. (He also maybe subconsciously hopes that maybe there’s still a way for him to get through to Anakin.)

So he writes letters. Letters that are flowery as hell and increasingly deeply romantic and eventually include tasteful and yet extremely erotic descriptions of Making Love. Anakin, on the other end of the damn universe, IS A PILE OF GOO. Who IS this person, and why does he seem to know how to push EVERY BUTTON ANAKIN HAS??? It’s almost like this person can read his mind, or that they’ve met in another life! (Anakin is, naturally, still preoccupied with trying to raise Padme from the dead during all of this, but he figures when he succeeds at that, he and Padme can go find this mystery boyfriend of his and they can all live happily ever after.) 

And then one day, out of nowhere, the letters stop. And Anakin is distraught. Did something happen to his beloved? Surely he couldn’t have been on Alderaan somehow, right?! And on top of dealing with all of this, Obi-Wan’s dead now, and he’s got some complicated feelings about that, too. He sinks even further into the Dark Side, now convinced he’ll never be happy again. 

And then eventually of course Luke saves the day, and then Anakin saves the day, and then Anakin gets to be a ghost, and there’s Obi-Wan again. 

(Obi-Wan probably greets him with a few select lines from – in his opinion – one of his better sonnets. Anakin damn near faints, and Obi-Wan tries not to die a second time laughing that Anakin literally NEVER FIGURED OUT IT WAS HIM WRITING THE LETTERS ALL THOSE YEARS. Then there’s probably a lot of making out. The End.)

Some fun pureblood biology headcanons: - Force Lightning users sometimes get staticky when they’re excited or angry - Those little ridges are vestigial fins used to regulate temperature during the hot summers that used to occur on prehistoric Korriban. They get the Sith equivalent of “goosebumps” when their ridges flare up in the heat - Sith babies purr when they are content. For adults it is less common and seen as immature, but to most aliens it’s ridiculously cute - Sith have two livers and as a result can drink most other species under the table - Forked tongues are rare but seen as attractive. Some eccentrics undergo surgery to get the “perfect split” - Sith have a tapetum lucidum (reflective animal eye). Some Sith don’t like taking pictures with the flash enabled for this reason. - Some less common sugars have a mild hallucinogenic effect on Sith. It’s sometimes known as a “sugar rush”, but it differs from the human definition. - Sith have semi-retractable “claws”. However, they can typically only extend them a few millimeters. - Sith are basically lizard cats - Knocking things off of desks and licking random bugs are common impulses - Hate Water So Muhchhhch…..it bad

Bruce isn’t actually a human in the fantasy AU. But for the sake of this great Ask.

What if Bruce was Human While Dick is a merman and Jason a yet-to-be-vampire. - There would be water EVERYwhere in the manor. - Bruce spend most of his free time taking care of Dick, he still wears shirt and pants even if it’s wasted because he’ll end up in the pool or dripping wet. -Think about poor Alf trying to clean up really. - Jason was human before the Lazarus Pit. He had dormant Vampire genes which makes him faster, stronger, see in the dark. (there was actually no reason to keep him from the robin mantle) - Jason now has a brother which is a fucking fish. It’s Hilarious, Dick would finally find someone who could keep up with how fast he is in the Water. - On a very serious and angsty tone, medias would go wild on why Bruce Wayne would adopt a merman or a tiny bodybuilder. On which he would response by hosting charity to fight against Black market.

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