Sitting On Balcony, Drinking Coffee, Smoking And Sunbathing In Early Morning Rays.

Sitting on balcony, drinking coffee, smoking and sunbathing in early morning rays.

"I can live with this..."

Realized this one's so old most of you have probably not even seen it.. [one of the first pictures I posted on here.]

Lazy sunday morning with a young hungover Ash.. 💤

Pose by the amazing @enniewritesathing

Pillow by the incredible @oppasims

I really wish I had better ways [any way really] to regulate my emotions in a healthy way.. Feel like I have very little control over the fluctuations in my mood and I'm kinda just being dragged around by the current.

It makes me destructive in ways I do not wish to be. It's also fucking painful cause the degree of whatever I'm feeling is most often unbearably intense and honestly way more excessive than the situation calls for.. [I'm always aware of this, but that doesn't really change anything.]

The only coping skill I feel I can really use in these moments is just removing myself from people/the situation. If I can't interact with anyone I can't fuck things up either..

I would really love to have ways to effectively ease the emotional distress tho.. Nowadays I'm just trying to control my breathing and focus on not giving into impulses until the worst has passed.. I know I can't trust my thoughts or reasoning in these moments and that I'll be way more rational once I manage to calm down..

How I brush my hair:

I jab at it with a hairbrush and whatever doesn't detangle dies a violent death..

Someone just walked up to me and asked if I had snapchat..

Me: It's that yellow thing, right? No. I don't have that. 💀

[I'm very aware I sound like I'm 65 by the way]

You know when you're entering a pin code and for a second you start to think of it as a series of numbers and not just a well ingrained pattern of motion and you completely blank on what the code is.. yeah.. That's where I'm at right now.. 💀