I Love It And I Love You Even More For It

i love it and i love you even more for it

disaster dilf and reckless dumbass

Y E S. PERFECT.

obsessed with @ddeadbot’s bbq headcanon and the thought of vik just wearing dumbass aprons (vik pics from @dustysalmon)

v x vik headcanon brainworm: vik wears the ever-typical “kiss the cook/chef” apron specifically so he can get mess with v but then it backfires on him, smthn like

vik: “aaaaand here’s one perfectly-seared hamburger for my favourite scraggly merc!”

v: “ha, ha, very funny. now give it here, thank you!” *goes to take it*

vik: “ah - not so fast. you forgot one thing...” *points to the “kiss the cook” apron while clacking tongs, holding plate just out of reach, definitely half-joking, definitely also hoping they will*

v: “...are you serious right now?”

vik: “sorry, v, i don’t make the rules. gonna need a peck riiiiiiight here—“ *points to his cheek with raised eyebrows* “—if you wanna get your hands on this hamburger.”

v: “YOU DIDN’T MAKE JACKIE—”

jackie in the background: “actually—“

vik: *in a mocking voice* “oh, woe is this hamburger, brought into this universe only to be rejected, just like its cook!” *stops dicking around, starts to hand the plate to v* “okay, nah, I’m just messing around with ya, v, here y—“

v: *smirking, kisses vik deadass on the lips, taking their plate from him as he stands there, just blinking and trying to process what just happened* “thanks for the hamburger, viky!” *walks off*

vik: “huh. o-okay.” *proceeds to barely be able to function around v for the rest of the night*

Thats what DLC should be like tbh

V chooses “quiet life” over “blaze of glory” in their conversation with Dex and it results in them politely shaking his hand, exiting his car and returning to Viktor to tell him “hey you were right that guy seems like bad news can I just help out around here instead?”

Rest of the game’s just passing medical tools to the big hunky back-alley doctor while he regales V with boxing trivia and stories from his trauma team days.

More Viktor headcanons because I’m trash for this beautiful man:

There are some Vik/V too... Hope there aren't many errors... anyways. ENJOY.

TIRED BISEXUAL DISASTER™

We know this already but this guy is H U G E - 6'3, whoopin' healthy 219lbs and bUILD LIKE A TANK.

I think he's around 48-52 years old.

"I can't, I'm old."

Look I know what I said about socks but hear me out... Vik 100% has a collection of those silly ties with cartoon characters like pokemon etc... he likes that blue one with cats best...

He knew V was special when he finished installing their first implant after they first met and shot him with "So, do I get a lollipop for bein' a brave patient, doc?" with that cheeky smirk of theirs... even if just for shits and giggles Vik actually gave them their lollipop the next time they visited his clinic. "Fine, you my fave doc now, won't go anywhere else."

He has Hamsa and evil eye tattoo on his left pectoral, Misty told him that it meant protection from evil and he thought it fitting as a symbol of starting his career as a ripperdoc - he saves lives after all.

Viktor smokes. Not very often, sometimes he can go several days without cigarettes but if the day at clinic is hard or gods forbid he lost a patient... he smokes like a chimney. By some mysterious coincidence he started smoking even more when V came along. I wonder why?

He genuinely enjoys V's company. He LOVES when they just sit at the clinic and talk or even just sit in silence. Their presence is really refreshing for this old doc.

Once Viktor, Misty, Jackie and V went to actually eat IN the restaurant. Misty and Vik casually sat and talked but, of course, Jack and V had a sword fight with chopsticks and Vik asked the waiter for two regular menus and for two menus for kids. After V called him "dad", "pops" or... wait for it... "daddy" for the rest of the evening, Viktor never made the mistake of going out to eat with V. Both V and Jackie still bring it up sometimes much to doc's dismay. Takeout is much safer option now.

Guess who is the one to always pick up horrendously drunk merc duo at 4am in the middle of the week. Yup. It's Viktor. Usually they wait for him outside, sitting on the pavement, arms on each others shoulders, singing love songs. Sometimes they burst in tears when they see Vik "coz youre the best friend I've had Viky", "yea, doc, there no other like ya".

Dad jokes. That's it.

UNGODLY ALCOHOL TOLERANCE. THIS MAN CAN DRINK AND DRINK AND DRINK AND SAY HES JUST TIPSY. Jackie? Under the table. V? Babbling something about "hopin' there is real afterlife" while hugging toilet bowl. Viktor? Checking if Jack still breathes and holding V's hair if necessary. "Amateurs" he thinks.

One of his most beloved possessions is a teddy bear. A gift from V. A they had put it "for caring for people around you and so you don't feel too lonely here in clinic and, well, for being you". Little fluffy fella has a special place in Vik's heart as well as on his couch right beside the boxing gloves.

No one keeps secrets like he does.

He takes GREAT pride in being the only person who knows V's real name.

Also he's the person who saw V at their most vulnerable. Bleeding, bruised, beaten, drunk, crying.

As true to their promise as they are, he thinks V's loyalty is amusing and rather sweet but also dangerous bUT V JUST WON'T GO TO ANY OTHER RIPPER. Found some new chrome somewhere else? They bought it and had it delivered to Vik's. Small repairs? Go to Vik's. Bleeding out somewhere in Pacifica? Go to Vik's. He swears he will strangle them himself one day.

Nicknames. Doll, Sweetheart, Champ, Captain, Big Guy, Charmer, Knock Out, Honey, Sweet pea, Cupcake, Pumpkin... I COULD GO ON FOREVER.

Usually it's Misty to find him sleeping on his desk but when it's V and Jack... well... let's say sharpie can be pain in the ass to wash off from your face.

Jackie got him pink gauges with daisies. As a joke. HA! Jokes on you Jack. He wears them. P R O U D L Y.

My man loves whisky. Nothing like late friday evening and a glass of liquid gold with ice.

Once, when V was keeping him company at clinic after he closed, he tried to be smooth (we all know the way he moves with that chair on wheels of his)... long story short he misjudged the distance from chair and he fell on his ass with a loud *T H U D*. He sat like that for some time. "Oh my god! Vik, are you ok?" "Yeah, yeah, just... give me a moment..." And that was the end of "Smooth Vik".

Officially Misty is his emotional support spiritualist. Unofficially V is his emotional support idiot merc, but also, like, the cause of most of his frustrations. JESUS V TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF IS THAT YOUR ARM THAT YOURE CARRYING IS THAT ANOTHER BULLET WOUND FOR FUCKS SAKE HOW ARE YOU STILL ALIVE ILL KILL YOU MYSELF I SWEAR. Smeone just give him a hug please.

Y E S

I saw that meme and immediately thought “big V energy”  Please tell me this hasn’t been done before

You know what I really want from cyberpunk? Drunk texts. Let V get wasted and then text everyone some random stupid shit. Let Johnny just stand there and look at V with utter disappointment.