Ughh Im Ngl I Miss Havin A Gf!!!:/

ughh im ngl i miss havin a gf!!!:/

i feel bad now

rejoice, fruits! a new member of the tree of growth has blossomed! we're excited to see you ripen, charlie!

um, hello

Im charlie (he/him)

this is my first time using social media

well, i used to have a LinkedIn but i deleted it

I recently joined the tree of growth. they are a weird bunch but its a nice place i guess.

fig said social media is important to spread our message

please take care interacting with this account if:

you are mormon (I am ex-mormon and have complicated feelings)

you are an asshole

you hate fruit (fig said she will teach me self defense)

shrimp fried rice <3

Shrimp Man x Fig - Fruit of the Sea - RPF Smut

Do not read if you’re a minor/not comfortable with smut!

Shrimp man had been gazing at the object of his affections for weeks now. Fig - by far the sexiest and freakiest fruit at the commune - had been walking around wearing nothing but the fruit skin she was born with. Shrimp man had begun to crave her. They wanted to see her full of his shrimp/fig hybrid spawn…

He began to attempt to get her attention by molting his shell around her - a sign of comfort and vulnerability - as well as releasing her pheromones into the air, intending to signify to other shrimp that he was in heat - but unfortunately this does not work on figs. Fig simply ignored them, favoring her machete collection over the poor shrimp.

Shrimp man decided it was time to up her game if she wanted to woo Fig. He fried some rice seasoned with tomatoes, her favorite dish (that isn’t figs), and lay in the bed of rice in a sexy shrimp position.

As soon as Fig walked into the kitchen, she became immediately aroused. The sight of Shrimp Man lying in the tomato rice, stretching their many legs enticingly… it was too much. She dove at him and the two began to make out passionately. Shrimp man stuck one of her gentler claws into Fig’s soft, juicy center, then began slurping up her insides as she screamed out in pleasure.

They mischievously spat out a seed and tackled her with their many shrimp legs. Fig caressed his face, her fragment juices everywhere. But before they could continue their fruity affair, they heard footsteps coming down the stairs. Alarmed, they hid themselves in the rice.

Cherry appeared in the kitchen, having come down to get themself some orange juice, but were more than pleased to see a gorgeous plate of tomato fried rice before them.

“Well, don’t mind if I do…” They grabbed the plate and a fork and began to head back up the stairs to eat. Shrimp held Fig tight as they shook in fear… But neither one of them could admit that it hadn’t been worth it… even if they were to be devoured.

-bad

-great

-fine

-ok

-nice

-amazing

-lovely

Alright. We’re settling this discourse once and for all.

In the tags, tell me your opinion on:

Mayonnaise

Frozen Yogurt 

Salt and Vinegar Chips

Sweet Potatoes

Kiwi

Ginger Ale

Microwave Ramen