Rating (some Of) Star Trek Characters From Tos And Aos By Whether Or Not I Think They Wash Their Ass.

Rating (some of) star trek characters from tos and aos by whether or not I think they wash their ass.

Jim T Kirk (tos):

Yes absolutely 8/10 very clean as expected from a bisexual man with a lot of gay feelings for his first officer.

Jim T Kirk (aos):

A cursory wipe but he gets better eventually after he hooks up with a girl who likes pegging and discovers his ✨gay feeling✨. 3/10 to like, 6/10.

Leonard 'Bones' McCoy:

Yes. Spotless, both versions original and reboot. This man is a doctor and also just hygienic. 10/10.

Spock (tos):

Quick and efficient, this is a man who showers in five minutes and is still cleaner than the guy who took a three hour shower. 10/10.

Spock (aos):

He's still riding the high of his first act of rebellion and sees his ass as too dirty to touch but still attempts it. I'll give him a 5/10 for effort.

Sulu:

Yes. This is a homosexual, not only does he clean his ass, he values personal hygiene and dedicated Saturdays to taking care of himself. 12/10.

Chekov:

No, this is a teenage boy who's booksmarts have left no room for common sense and he joined Starfleet at fourteen, right at the worst time, puberty wise. 1/10 because he's a clean boy otherwise.

Uhura:

Do I even have to give a reason? This is a women with class. Of course she cleans her ass. 10/10

That's all for now, feel free to disagree and I'm not a coward so if someone gives me a compelling enough arguement to change one of the ratings I will.

Wesley Crusher sweater appreciation

Dude, I saw Sokka with his hair down and had som realisations.

zuko sees sokka with his hair down and has some…realizations 

I kinda understand white people in horror movies now.

If I was given an offer for a house in good condition, in a nice neighbourhood with a front and back garden that was cheap and the only downside was a haunting?

I would have my wallet out before I was even told about the dead people.

I would put up with anything as long as it didn't cost me an arm and a leg to buy it.

Love villains/antagonists who's backstory isn't used to redeem their actions but add context and nuance.

Characters who suffered and bled and worked to be strong, who were pushed back and fought against and beat for daring to dream higher than their station but reached up with bloodied hands and took it anyways.

Love characters who should never have been put into positions of power, not because they didn't deserve them, but because they were so deeply traumatised by their past that being put in these positions twists them so irredeemably that they can't come back from it.

People who clawed their way up from the muck and placed themselves on pedestals, not because they should, but because they could.

Who started out the lowest of the low and made something if themselves but had to change from the hero of their own story to the villain of someone else's.

Someone who, from someone else's perspective, is a two dimensional, evil person but from an outside perspective was a self fulfilling prophecy.

Someone who was put down by the kind of person they bled to become, who looked at those better off than them and was jealous and became the kind of person they would have despised as a child.

Villains who are evil, who's actions can't be forgiven, who doesn't even want to be forgiven, who killed the part of themselves that would deserve forgiveness.

Who's backstory tells you exactly why they are like this, that strips them of their apathy and hate and exposes every sensitive nerve they have and says, 'This child, this poor beaten child, this is who hurt so many, this is who died to give you your villain, who had to kill every good part of themselves to make your antagonist.'

Who, by all rights, could have been our hero, is a reflection of the hero in all ways that matter, but were corrupted by their experience rather than strengthened by them.

Yeah, your functioning body that doesn't unnecessarily ache for no reason is cool but can it do this.

*stands up too fast while stretching and moving my jaw, unleashing a series of popping and cracking noises as I black out and collapse*