This ( W O R L D )

                             this   ( W O R L D )

                                                 …….. it isn’t  worth  the  s a v i n g

leviamusesinpurgatory‌:

Excuses, it all felt like excuses.

It shouldn’t happen to him. Black had been fighting against White and her demands for as long as he had his unit, and yet he couldn’t hide this from them. They could see it his hesitance and it was blatant enough that no one batted an eye when No. 4 had taken charge. He was a man who could hide struggle from his team, but not despair.

It was excuses. That was all those words would ever be. He should have been better, in every instance.

The female Attacker. Black glanced up to study No. 4′s face; he had wanted to counter, but not in the way that was expected.

Don’t talk about her like that, as if you don’t know her at all. The Instructor inhaled, he was almost certain this would all come out. Everything that had been left unsaid between the two androids in this room would be laid bare.

“If I had spoken to her sooner, maybe she would have listened to a direct order.” Though he scoffed as the words connected with the truth of the situation, “For someone so stalwart, she disobeys orders often.”

Black stopped himself. Realisation crept up his back, threatening to take over his vision. Living like that was bad. He needed to redact that, fix what he said. It was with those thoughts that he steeled himself and set his gaze pointedly on No. 4 as he corrected his statement:

“–Disobeyed.”

It wasn’t as if the Instructor of the M Unit had been the only one lost in thought after the Pearl Harbor Descent assignment, he had no room to judge him, superior or not.

The Bunker felt oddly empty despite the YoRHa units clearly inhabiting it, and he’s well-aware of the reason behind it, though he would deny it to his dying breath. No. 4 wasn’t exempt from his attention drifting away from assignment, he was simply better than the man before him at hiding it, in this point in time. It was only further proof of just how badly the recent course of events had shaken the Instructor.

Tch.

He refrains from making a sound as gray eyes bore into the pair hidden behind his visor. How distant he had made his description of the female unit he referred to had instantly gotten the Instructor’s attention, and while not entirely unsurprised--It was still unnerving to be on the receiving end of the elder android’s stare. 

“.....She was stubborn, worse than No. 3.”

The reminder cut deep, the knowledge that he was never going to hear that voice inevitably going back and forth with his partner Attacker No. 3, nor would he sit in comfortable silence with that voice’s source once they were alone. Frustratedly, the Gunner bites the inside of his mouth to prevent himself from reacting too openly.

“So it is about her.”

leviamusesinpurgatory‌:

“You are hot-headed, No. 4, not an idiot.”

The statement came as a cut through all else. Black didn’t want to sit and talk around the subject, there shouldn’t have been a need to with No. 4. If anyone could speak their mind, if anyone would stand before him and not falter, it should have been the Gunner before him. 

“She was many things, and you know it. Knew it. If you have something to say about this, talk, No. 4.”

He didn’t appreciate his student starting this, then acting as if he didn’t know what they were meant to talk about. So it is about her, he pries, having previously stated it was. It irked him, more than it should, but if he wanted this conversation to happen–

This wasn’t the right way to act. He felt like a child.

“Do you have something to say, No. 4?”

There was a softness to his voice that he never thought he would share with others. A softness that only came out with the android in question, that had only come out with her. Now he just felt weak, awake, and in dire need of something he will never come to know again. Had he ever looked this broken in front of her, how would she have reacted?

“You knew it was, and you’ve come to talk to me.” There was silence, something he wanted to say, “You’ve kept something to yourself.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Maybe he shouldn’t have said anything after all. The moment he’d opened his mouth to confront Black about this matter had been the moment that he knew it would soon be his turn to speak up. Like clockwork, the attention is soon turned upon the Gunner.

“....Instructor. If you’re trying to imply something between me and her, we were just comrades. Maybe friends at most.”

No.

The only thing that the feelings he bore towards No. 3 and No. 20 shared was the fact that he had taken a step back for both of their sakes. For as much as he complained and made his irritation known, he cared for No. 3, he saw him as a close friend. But what he felt for No. 20, that didn’t matter. That hadn’t mattered the moment he’d seen just how her breath caught in her throat whenever the Instructor passed by or spoke to her.

“I asked you out of concern since you’re normally more composed than this. That’s all.”

It especially hadn’t mattered when he’d seen how happy the two of them, the people most important to him, were together.

How correct his decision was to step back only seemed to solidify, seeing just how broken Black looked in the wake of the female Attacker’s departure from this world. It made No. 4′s jaw lock, and he resisted the urge to clench his fists in frustration. Orders were absolute, even hew knew that, and yet had he known what was going on at that exact point in time, if he hadn’t been so busy focusing on training....

...I would have gone to Earth’s surface in a heartbeat to help her, Commander be damned. 

No. 6 is, as stated in canon materials, homosexual, but not in the sense that he actually wants to be intimate with the other person. He is very much a sexual sadist who gets off from causing immense physical suffering towards others, as well as inflicting mental/emotional pain. He adores underhanded tactics like surprise attacks, backstabbing, and taking hostages, as it only adds to his fetish. To him, cutting the person up, watching their blood fly, making them scream in pain, and looking down at them all the while as they crawl on the ground gives him as much pleasure as sex would give a normal person.

His fixations are always aimed at men, and if confronted with a woman would pay little to no attention to them outside of normal conversations. Whereas he would take as much time as possible to drag out a man who has his interest’s suffering (ie. Black) and enjoy every second of it to the fullest, he would more or less put as little effort as possible into killing a woman, or leave them with a mortal wound so they can bleed out alone. Hurting women won’t get him off in the least, so he doesn’t bother. This can, however, be bypassed if he is using a woman as a hostage in order to inflict emotional trauma onto another. That in itself would give him the motivation to actually put effort into torturing them. 

“.....”

Honestly, of all times to bring her out when there’s nothing out here for her--There are better things to be done.

                                    𝖨 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗄 𝗒𝗈𝗎'𝗋𝖾 𝗁𝗈𝗍, 𝖨 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗄 𝗒𝗈𝗎'𝗋𝖾 𝖼𝗈𝗈𝗅–                                   𝖸𝗈𝗎'𝗋𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗄𝗂𝗇𝖽 𝗈𝖿 𝗀𝗎𝗒 𝖨'𝖽 𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗅𝗄 𝗂𝗇 𝗌𝖼𝗁𝗈𝗈𝗅.