For Those Who Can Look At Themselves In The Mirror, For Those Who Got Their Lives In Check;

For those who can look at themselves in the mirror, for those who got their lives in check;

Good for you, i mean that genuinely, you guys are doing what a lot of us cant do

Dont make your path my path though

Im not in the same path as you that i can just suddenly be happy and finally give 2 sh!ts about myself

I dont want to hear that it's all in the way i think, and i can control my views on my own life with my mind

You know how hard that is for people who lost everything they loved?

Lost their sense of security? Their hope in humanity? The love for themselves?

What if they lost all that?

Your really just going to sit there and make it like my own mind did all this?

No

Be quiet

Listen and understand first before you put your beliefs on someone because i can tell you right now not everyone can just see the good things they have in life with dark glasses

Glasses that make it hard to see in the mirror without noticing every flaw of oneself

How about instead sheding light to what good things they do have instead?

"Hey you got great friends! Heck you have me!"

"Hey you got up today!"

"Hey, you're still here, and i appreciate this!"

Dont make it like the choices people make are all because they cant look at themselves in the mirror

Thats the equivalent of saying its their fault, you jerk!

Just help them find brighter glasses and even if they are still stubborn to take those glasses off theres a such thing as time

And everyones time runs far differently than others

Thank you

Ive been avoiding hitas for awhile now and hopefully pulling myself out of this nightmare these past few years have brought to me, between losing my sense of what family is and my sense of love, i have lost the light and soul within me. I tried staying around for my friends who were there supporting me and comforting me but i cannot stay anymore. scared to ask for help but then too afraid to take on the suggestions they offer me and ultimately draining their moods with mine, i refuse to stick around and bother them anymore.

For awhile now, im not exactly sure when, theres been this inner war in me constantly draining me out with this constant feeling like i dont belong and none of it is going to get better, constantly looping myself in hatred, grief, and other intense low moods i cant seem to break out of. Sadly I've already lost someone i deeply care about because of this war and pain, afraid to loose them and i ended up loosing them anyway and now gone for good and i no longer have any possible way to contact them. The words they said to me in anger sank deep and made me feel like ive done them wrong for the 4 years knowing them and being told i hurt them, that i truely should be alone and that i was cruel them without knowing this until last minute has really messed me up badly. and yet my heart still follows their direction even through this pain. I cant take it anymore.

I hate pain and i hate dealing with these overwhelming emotions feeling like a crying disaster after so many months of this cycle ive never dealt with before, between losing interest of things i usually enjoy and then struggling to find new interests i cannot upkeep a happy environment for anyone, including my family, my friends or even for myself. However i dont have a choice anymore but to sit through it and keep hoping every day this feeling goes away, so to save the people i care about from my own pain i have to isolate myself for awhile hopefully recollect myself and maybe wake up better. Just anything to wake me up from this nightmare, but i dont know when ill return and for all i know it will be years before i can properly return again. Im sorry

From now on I will focus on healing

And i wont make sense doing it but i dont care...

Im healing

Found this fella in my files- despite mixed feelings behind one of em now i still kinda proud all the pieces

Like im kinda suprised about how i did the top left one! So many colored pens i used omg :0

And the details for top right~ mecha is not my strong suit butndamn did i do good thst day! XD

Shiii- despite the bottom right used to be a message to someone i cared about i cannot describe my love for the cute lil plannets hehe

ITS OFFICIAL!!

I dont like removing followers, but between dealing with the most toughest situation mentally in my life and random posts now popping up on my feed that disturbs the hell out me how their online in the first place

ANY AND ALL FOLLOWERS WHO FOLLOW ME WITHOUT A TITLE OR A PROFILE PIC IS GETTING BOOTED!!

I dont know what the algorithm is doing with yall as my followers, but im not accepting it anymore! Im even getting dms from people who break tumblr rules then go follow me like WHY?! YOU THINK IM INTERESTED IN NUDITY?! N O IM NOT YOU PERVERTS

AHEm- so with that said good bye some of my followers