James: So, Then I Said, Guess You Better-

James: So, then I said, “Guess you better-”

Random Gryffindor: Do you ever stop talking?

James: Oh. Sorry. (walks away)

Regulus: Listen, here’s what we’re not going to do. (cracks knuckles)

*Next day*

James: Then, I went…oh, I didn’t mean to talk so much. Sorry.

Regulus: Go on. Then, you went…

James: (grins) Then, I went to Honeydukes and they had exploding gum balls!

Regulus: Exploding? Explain, in great detail, for as long as you like.

if i was orpheus i just wouldn't have turned around lol

James: Hey, Moony, what do Blacks like to do for a date?

Sirius: I'm flattered but...

Remus: Oh Sirius, he's not asking because of you idiot

James: Remus...

Sirius: What does that- Wait, you're dating Regulus?!

James: It's not what you think it is

Remus: *arching his brow*

James: Actually it's exactly what you think it is

Sirius: *crying* My little baby brother!

"Thank you for believing I had one" Yeah no, actually sobbing

jesus christ reading jegulus anything in school is a mistake im in the middle of class and i see this shit and you expect me not to break down sobbing???

like???

My recent hyperfixation on constellations has made me realize the Sirius Black's name is just "Dog black" or black dog... We hate jkr but damn that's some good naming right there, Moony and Padfoot's names are just too good..

(For those of you that don't know; Remus Lupin's name basically means Moon McMoon.)

Remus, sitting in the Potters' kitchen: And Jugson keeps being an arse about my sick leave. Sirius said we should break his legs but I think I'd get fired for that. I don't know what to do.

Lily: You've come to the right place. Reg, happen to know any of Jugson's dark secrets?

Regulus, not looking up from sketching: He licks poisonous frogs to get high - keeps them in his snuffbox.

Lily: Brilliant. Now James, imagine you're 14 again and you're trying to slip someone a potion as a prank, how would you do that to Remus' boss?

James, excited: Well at Hogwarts I'd have tried to get something into the drinks while they were still in the kitchen. Jugson makes other people get him coffee - I remember you complaining - so I'd intercept that and put the potion in his cup before it even gets to his table.

Lily: So, Remus, what youre going to do is take the toad venom I give you, slip it into his coffee - it won't kill him but he'll have to go to St Mungo's. Mungo's'll advise Poison Control to investigate - don't forget to wash the cup out. They'll find the frogs, Jugson'll lose his license to work in household monster removal or whatever your job's called. We can always tip them off about the snuffbox. How's that?

Remus: That's uh... wow... you're really efficient.

Lily: Yeah, I think we could use this to run the country.