ellie | she/they | 19
819 posts
Dilettanteinlove - Do I Dare Disturb The Universe? - Tumblr Blog
not normal about orpheus and eurydice. you loved someone so much it opened the stones of the underworld. so much that death had to listen. so much that everything stopped for your love. so much that you turned around. so much that even when you did wrong. she forgave you.
this morning I am thinking about the way a space becomes charged by repeated action. Like how would a room that has held a lot of prayers feel different from a concert venue? I'm thinking about your heartbeat imbuing the space in front and behind your chest with its signature and becoming an energy center. The way repeated thought changes your mental landscape, how can intention change the energetic landscape of a space without adding items? If you clap in the room you're in, the air will feel crisp..if you're sensitive to that anyway
Ok less brooding and moping and analysing and lethargy and melancholy and inertia more ACTION even within the limited field available to me. More leaving the house more discipline more drive more fire more relentlessness more joy!!!!
if you hold on to that yearning for too long it becomes indistinguishable from cowardice
how it feels knowing that life has not forgotten you, that it holds you in its hand and will not let you fall
i wish romance was real and not just displaced longing for what was missing in the past
YOU WILL FIND A WAY!!!! YOU WILL FIND A WAY . You will find a WAY ….. you WILL find a way . You will find a way you will find a way……!! YOU WILL FIND A WAY YOU WILL FIND A WAY you will find a Way you will (find) a way you will find. a way you will find a way YOU WILL FIND A WAY!!!!!!!
i hate how "being a girl's girl" has replaced feminism. I hate that enforced conformity has replaced genuine compassion for and solidarity with other women. I hate how women call each other "pick me's" for not conforming to femininity or for daring to critique something other women like. I hate how we just keep finding new socially acceptable ways to bully other women for being unattractive or outspoken or difficult or complicated or weird or ambitious or for not performing femininity. I hate those front facing camera "comedians" whose whole thing is making up a straw-woman to make fun of. I hate the obsession with "girlhood" and clinging to being a girl instead of a woman. i hate "the girl version of the roman empire" and "girlhood" and it's just consumerism and I hate the characterisation of girlhood as passivity, niceness, sweetness, helplessness and frivolity and I hate the revival of gender essentialism even as a joke!!!
dear people with OCD: the next time you have spiraling & intrusive thoughts, what-ifs, or catastrophizing scenarios, I am sending a cardigan-wearing 46-year old NYU professor directly into your brain and he says "Aaaaand scene!!!" and he claps his hands slowly. and he says "Wow. Wow. Powerful stuff. Evocative imagery. A little bit post-modern, a little bit hysterical realism in the vein of Don Delilo but let's pause right here." and you will recognize your thoughts as a perplexing avant-garde film shown to an audience of 15 liberal arts students who are now trying to get a good grade and sleep with their professor.
By the way, you can improve your executive function. You can literally build it like a muscle.
Yes, even if you're neurodivergent. I don't have ADHD, but it is allegedly a thing with ADHD as well. And I am autistic, and after a bunch of nerve damage (severe enough that I was basically housebound for 6 months), I had to completely rebuild my ability to get my brain to Do Things from what felt like nearly scratch.
This is specifically from ADDitude magazine, so written specifically for ADHD (and while focused in large part on kids, also definitely includes adults and adult activities):
Here's a link on this for autism (though as an editor wow did that title need an editor lol):
Resources on this aren't great because they're mainly aimed at neurotypical therapists or parents of neurdivergent children. There's worksheets you can do that help a lot too or thought work you can do to sort of build the neuro-infrastructure for tasks.
But a lot of the stuff is just like. fun. Pulling from both the first article and my own experience:
Play games or video games where you have to make a lot of decisions. Literally go make a ton of picrews or do online dress-up dolls if you like. It helped me.
Art, especially forms of art that require patience, planning ahead, or in contrast improvisation
Listening to longform storytelling without visuals, e.g. just listening regularly to audiobooks or narrative podcasts, etc.
Meditation
Martial arts
Sports in general
Board games like chess or Catan (I actually found a big list of what board games are good for building what executive functioning skills here)
Woodworking
Cooking
If you're bad at time management play games or video games with a bunch of timers
Things can be easier. You might always have a disability around this (I certainly always will), but it can be easier. You do not have to be this stuck forever.
Posters for National Theater of Korea's production of Macbeth, designed by Yuni Yoshida and photographed by Noh Juhan. [1][2]
Obviously this is an adorable bit but I'm so struck by how different this is from so many little kid shows today like.......the muted colors. no background noise. no sound effects. you can literally hear Jim Henson breathing between his lines. Ernie is talking very slowly, meandering, letting the kids digest the info. it's a full minute before you get the payoff of it all. man
where's that masterpost of quotes that have no right going as hard as they do. I'd like to submit "Protagonism is best left to teens and the insane"
never beating the nervous prey animal allegations
Me: You know how when you were a kid and you’d wish that you’d get sick or injured in a way that would justify why you didn’t live up to your potential?
Everybody, apparently: No?
so it’s a wednesday night in july and you’re at home and you’ve showered and you’ve masturbated and you’ve gnawed at the inside of your mouth and you’ve eaten and washed the dishes and fixed a corner of the fitted sheet on your bed and texted your grandmother and thought positive thoughts and still the feeling comes. what then
i need 40yo me come from the future right fucking now and say don't worry wait a little longer it's gonna be okay you'll find your place
I'm Freezing Cold Shivering In The Snow
- on childhood loneliness
@aphexxtween on tiktok/ @mazzystarjpg/ mastermind- taylor swift/ the virgin suicides/ @heavensickness/ if you’re anything like me- taylor swift/ pen15/ @mango-season
and let me tell you something. when the girls say it's not about the hormones, it's not about the surgery, it's not about the makeup, it's not even about the clothes, they're right. i get called ma'am just as often, if not more, in a t-shirt shorts and no makeup as i do like this (🙍♀️). and a lot of that is disrespect, y'know. a lot of that is disrespect.
but you wanna know what it's about ? it's about ...going to the grocery store, or the whataburger. or? ...the food bank. i love the food bank. one time the food bank gave me salmon🐟steaks.🥩 they have butternut squash in the fall...🍂🍁one time they gave me hundred count box of like. blended fruit 🍇🍍🥭🍈🍎🍉🍊slushy that came from a mental hospital. . u,m i gave some to the parents around the neighborhood and then i gave the rest to a mutual aid meetup. y'know, like free market table. because what am i gonna do with a hundred 💯frozen fruit cups right? ..i ate a couple. they were good. cherry 🍒➕🍍pineapple. youknow, they were nice. but a hundred, that's a lot.
one time they gave me TWELVE chicken thighs in a ziploc bag. and i was concerned about the ziploc bag🤔.but i decided to marinate them.a little bit of rosemary 🌿.. i think, thyme,. and Sage. salt 🧂and pepper. a honey soy sauce marinade . it was delicious. Garlic.🧄⭐💯
you need to eat. it's about food. it's about fats and oils and omega 3. PROTEIN, alright? Get Some Fat In Your Diet. three (3) meals a day and two (2) snacks. and a dessert if you're nasty...if you're kinky. that's what it's about.
