You Know A Fanfic Author Is New To Smut When They Write The Steamiest Foreplay Known To Man

you know a fanfic author is new to smut when they write the steamiest foreplay known to man…

then have the actual sex be the most vanilla shit ever

As I said in a previous post; I will be creating more Encanto content along with my usual content.

I would like to introduce you to my newest OC, Lombia

Name: Colombia Reyes

Age: 25

Occupation: Dance Teacher

Background: She moved onto the Encanto from the outside, hoping for a fresh start. Once there, she needed help building and establishing her business, which is where she meets the Madrigals. Her and Isabela are fast friends, and she later befriends Mirabel as well. They give her the nickname, Lombia. She was named after her parents love of Colombia and they were very involved in dances and festivals. They died in a tragic accident, which made Lombia lose herself in grief. Deciding she needed to get away from the bustle of the city and find herself and her passions again, she traveled to the legendary mythical town called Encanto, hoping the trip would give her some perspective, only to find out it was actually real.

Back to her life in Encanto, she has a passion for making people happy and feels the best way to do that is through dance, like her parents did for her. Abuela, who values tradition, modesty, and conservatism, does not approve of Lombia, thinking her provocative and lewd. Abuela thinks she’s a nice enough girl, and very pretty, but wishes Lombia would teach and practice more “appropriate” dances.

She’s over at the casita fairly often, and is very likable, but somewhat dorky and is very clumsy when not dancing. She loves aquqfrescas, particularly watermelon and mango. You can usually find her playing with the local children or dancing by the riverside with the flowing water and graceful butterflies.

If you want to actually see her and what she looks like, I have a TikTok account called @onlinelibrarian where I’ve posted a drawing of her!

So Stephanie Me*er deadass made Jasper a C*o federate for no logical reason that was in any way necessary to the plot….

But didn’t have him apologize directly to Bella after trying to kill her in New Moon.

The math ain’t mathing on this one, fam

Especially since in the very next book, he’s giving her his whole life story and they’re all buddy-buddy.

Make it make sense

In preparation for the new Bella/Jasper fic I’m writing headcanons for them getting together!

(This is under the assumption that they are both single following the main events of New Moon)

Jasper would probably hate himself for having feelings for Bella, for a lot of reasons, the biggest being that she was his little brother’s ex-girlfriend and that he’d tried to kill her once.

Bella would be much more laid back if not a little anxious for Alice and Edward’s sake, she wanted to avoid awkward confrontation if her and Jasper did get together

Bella would go to Esme for advice but Esme wouldn’t judge her (Rosalie) or make it too sexual (Emmett) and was a woman (sorry Carlisle and Charlie)

Jasper would ask Carlisle for help concerning a friend (he would do that don’t lie to yourself) because Carlisle was understanding and would pretend not to see through it

Esme and Carlisle tell them both the same thing; to confront each other head on (romantically) and hope they return each others feelings

(Carlisle and Esme both know who the other is talking about and are laughing at them behind the scenes, all in all they want their kids to be happy)

Bella is probably the instigator, she’s an adult, she’s dated a vampire before and she’s survived multiple attacks at the hands of other vampires; she could deal with one more that she actually liked

Jasper would’ve admitted it first, bc I mean come on, look at him, man’s is up for any confrontation, Bella just happened to get to him first

She was pretty low key about it too, she just told him she was falling for him and asked if he also had feelings for her, they were both very happy he said yes

Jasper wanted at least one monumental moment caused by him in their relationship, so before she could walk away to squeal to Esme, he grabbed her hip and pulled her into a sweet kiss

Emmett and Rosalie were in the room as well judging by the exaggerated moans and the scolding to not ruin their moment, it was nice to know they both supported it

Alice came in from the kitchen window with a lofty call of “Finally” she went to sit beside her two other siblings

Edward had gone to Denali after reading Esme’s thoughts in Bella asking out Jasper, he doesn’t agree with it and needs to get over that, he is happy that Jasper returns her feelings and can take care of her but then he’s reminded that he’s Jasper and changes his mind

Very cute, little awkward but pretty good, pretty good

Fr

men are so awful. reblog this if ur a girl with brown eyes

the entirety of breaking dawn part 2 was so boring bc her life was just so perfect and her only issue was her family dying from the volturi (they didn’t) and her daughter aging to death (she wont)

vampire bella could’ve been so much. and ended up being so little

I'm just saying everything about vampire!bella is a copout.