Now That I've Rewatched This Episode I Can Finally Add This Point: Matthew Benton Is Absolutely Part

now that i've rewatched this episode i can finally add this point: matthew benton is absolutely part of the reason emily confronts reid when nobody else is. she says in demonology that she feels like he saved her but that said saving was the catalyst for his issues. so this is at least partially emily repaying matthew for his kindness by trying to help someone who reminds her of him. she couldn't save matthew, but she can save reid. i can't see any way the parallels aren't intentional, especially when you consider that matthew shares a first name with reid's actor. i don't think that was a coincidence.

i think there are a few reasons reid is so particularly hostile towards emily post-2x15:

most simply, she was the newest member of the team, and therefore the one he knew the least and could most easily project onto. he doesn't know her well, so it's easiest to construe her actions as whatever he wants them to be in order to have someone to direct his anger at. he'd also feel less bad about attacking her over the other members of the team, who he knows far better (this is not calculated. im saying he needs someone to be angry at and he latches onto the closest person who he knows the least)

she replaced elle. i do ship spencelle (as a tragedy) but even if you take shipping goggles off, i do think they were quite close platonically. and even if you don't think he was close with elle, he definitely feels particularly guilty about her leaving. (he says so out loud with his mouth at the end of 2x6, when he's talking to morgan about the conversation he had with elle shortly before the case took a turn, and starts to obsess over what-ifs until morgan shuts that down). so not only is emily the newest member of the team, she's also replacing someone whose departure he explicitly feels particularly guilty about

she's calling him out on his obvious issues when none of the rest of the team are. ironically, i think its her newness that makes her feel like she can, and her newness that makes him respond so irately. i think the rest of the team feels uncomfortable and unsure of how to act—they know they need to confront him, but they worry about how to go about that without the friendship imploding. i'm not saying "well emily is new and doesn't gaf about him, so she doesn't care if confronting him makes him hate her." she wouldnt confront him if she didn't care about him, but she has less to lose. tying back to the first point, i also think emily being the one to confront him while also being so new to the team lets reid project whatever motivation he wants to onto her in a way he couldn't with the rest of the team. he can pretend she has an ulterior motive and therefor disregard her concern, while that would be a lot harder to do if someone he knew very well did the same. (again—this is not calculated).

i hope this makes sense 😭 i have a Lot of feelings on their friendship (as you can probably tell from my fics about them) and its rocky start. final thing: step 8 and 9 of NA concern making amends with the people you've hurt as a result of your addiction, and i think sometimes about the conversation he probably had with emily when he got to those.

Reblog if you stand against order, civilization, and goodness itself

fun fact: i used to use she/they/it pronouns until cis people ruined it for me. now im just she/her

this poem is about being nonbinary.

hey do you ever think that the reason reid knocks "shave and a haircut" on elle's door is because post-fisher king elle gets nervous when someone knocks on her door because she doesn't know who it is, so reid (or even the whole team) start knocking a pattern. do you ever think about elle checking the peephole anyway. i do.

im so sad that i dont have much to say analysis wise about 4x17 - demonology because it's such a fantastic emily episode and so many moments make my brain scream. and i want to analyse it so bad. but i've been an atheist my whole life and i really think the best analysis of that episode would come from someone who was raised catholic, or at least a lot more familiar with it than i am. if anyone can point me in the direction of some analysis about this episode from someone who does Get that aspect of the episode so i can reblog it and scream i will love you forever. or tell me your thoughts so i can scream. i know there are things to analyse i just dont think i have the background knowledge to do it well.