Ziad Nakad Spring 2018 Couture Part 2

Ziad Nakad spring 2018 couture part 2

“Shh, it’s alright,” the villain said. “You’re doing beautifully and I’m so proud of you. But that’s enough now. It was cruel of them to make you fight me - you could never have won. It’s not your fault.”

How do you know if a scene is too dialogue heavy, and what can you do to change it?

You read it out loud and if it’s

repetitive

redundant

unnatural 

out-of-character

awkward/creepy/silly/boring when the scene doesn’t call for it

a mouthful; the other characters are just waiting for them to shut up

hard to remember where they are and what they’re doing besides talking

clear they don’t even need to be talking that much anyway (especially if it’s a stealthy, sneaky scene which seems obvious but apparently some writers need to be reminded, mkay)

then the scene probably needs help. You change it by reading it out loud (or listen to it being read out loud) and cutting/revising/adding the parts your ear hears as problematic. If you can, read it with another person. 

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The royal family employs no bodyguards. A would-be assassin discovers why.