Comment From The Following Story: What's The Nastiest Thing You've Ever Seen In The Subway?

Comment from the following story: What's the nastiest thing you've ever seen in the subway?

Stuff like this is why I always read the comments at Gawker. No other website gets this distinction (blogs are exempt from this rule). This particular comment caught my eye because it has so much: a narrator (commenter), a villain (damn hipster!), an anti-hero (tiny puking asian man) and a movie like quality (check that last line. It's like a cherry on top).

I always read the comments here because there's just so much gold. Mostly because the commenters, like the writers, tend to be smart and funny and sarcastic. Partially because the first dickhead to spit out a youtube style comment ("1st!!1!!" "FAKE!!!") will get devoured like the last piece of fried chicken in the ghetto. I appreciate that sort of spirit in an internet community. It's a sign of quality.

2010fifaworldcup:

dubliner:

taf:

New Zealand drew with Italy 1-1 this morning.

The All Whites are ranked 78th in the world, while the Azzuri are ranked 5th.

Fuck yeah!

(This Reuters shot is from the game with Slovakia, which they also drew 1-1. How amazing is it? I bet the photographer creamed their pants when they saw it.)

Man, if I was the Italian Footbal team I'd be praying, like really praying, that the Mob hadn't placed any massive bets on this game.

You can see the thoughts of every player in this photo:

Goalie - What the fuck?!?

Italian Player - <gasp> OMFG!!

Kiwi Player - FUCK! YEAH! BITCHES!!! <followed by manic hip thrusting, removal of shirt and victory lap around bewildered Italian players>

soupsoup:

itsbedtime:

This song has been blowing my mind for a hot minute now. BLOWING MY MIND.

Commodores : Nightshift

One of the greatest tribute songs ever. I've spent a good chunk of the morning grooving to it and you should too

"It's your emotional instability that makes you so awesome!"

A backhanded compliment from a friend on Friday night.

The P word

This is really an expansion of a comment I left here.

Shane Jones, you give great entertainment.

For those of you unaware of the Shane Jones predicament, here's a quick breakdown: He's a highly ranked Labour politician who was tipped for leadership. While staying in a hotel he decided to watch some porn (as you do) and it got charged it to his ministerial credit card aka the credit card funded by taxpayers. The public found out and hilarity ensued.

I don't have a problem with the fact that Jones watched porn. It doesn't mean that he's a deviant. I don't know many guys who don't watch porn. It's so commonplace that budding starlets are routinely 'shocked, dismayed and saddened' to find that a 'private' sex tape is now available on the internet. Hell, a google search for barbie dolls can end with you watching porn.

I'm kinda 50/50 on how I feel about the fact that the porn was charged to his ministerial credit card. If I didn't know, I wouldn't have a problem. But I do know and I have a problem. It's not like I haven't paid for someone else's entertianment - I've flatted with guys before and I'm realistic on where a chunk of the internet bandwidth is going. And I think that's where the problem lies - why did he pay for porn?  WTF? Was this charge made in pre-internet days? Why did he pay for something you can get for free? There is an astounding variety of porn available on the internet. There is even a rule about the sheer amount available. You can get all of that for free if you hit the right links. See that? Free! I expect some sort of fiscal responsibility from politicians, especially ones that are earmarked for leadership of their respective parties. Sure, he paid it back. That's cool. But the charge shouldn't have happened in the first place when there's a non-paying alternative available.

But what really gets me is this: what kind of politician doesn't cover his damn tracks?? WTF man? Sure, he's not the only one to abuse the credit card but he definitely had one of the most entertaining statements. Only an idiot wouldn't realise that and not cover it up. Leaving it there to potentially be discovered? That's just slack and I place higher expectations on politicians. Do you think prime ministers got to be prime ministers by just letting shit slide? The most outrageous expense on Helen Clarke's statement was her phone bill. John Key's most noteworthy expense is his penchant for buying All Blacks jerseys for gifts overseas. See Jones? That's how you do it. If there was anything that could've made the news, I'm sure they either: charged it to their personal credit cards; paid cash; made damn sure that any trace of it was wiped away. Budding politicians take note: we do not tolerate such sloppy work.

Granted, he probably didn't intend to put the charge on his credit card. I've stayed in hotel rooms before and I've accidentally charged embarrassing things to another person's credit card. Shit happens. But he must've realised it was off. I work in the public sector. We are constantly reminded that anything we do can be OIA'd and we must be careful about where we spend tax dollars. I doubt things would be different for him. Although, to be honest, I'd be stunned if he was thinking about anything further than the matter in hand (pun intended).

To finish, I guess I'll leave you with this final tip about searching for porn: always remember to turn google safe search off. And don't click on anything with the following terms: 'tub girl' and 'eel girl'.

Oh hello...

I hear it's traditional to create a 'Welcome' post when you first start a blog so that people know what they're getting themselves into when they start reading. I suspect it's really to help keep the writer on track so that they don't get lost along the way and fill it with miscellaneous crap. Well, at least the miscellaneous crap that shouldn't be on the blog.

This blog was named after a phrase that I hear too often in the bureaucratic world I currently work in. It's misused and overused and I feel sorry for it. This is my way of saving it, although I will probably hurt it harder than any egotistical middle manager before me.

If you are my current manager, then this is a hobby that I work on in my spare time.

If you are not my current manager, then this is a way for me to cope with a tearfully boring job. It's a means to be productive during the work day and create something that will help me re-connect with my first 3 loves: reading, writing, being a smart-arse.

I don't quite know what this will be filled with yet. There will be links and pictures and posts. Pretty standard really. 

We'll see what happens. It can be an adventure.

This post is dedicated to Coco. She is a little dynamo.