Otto Loves Helaena Almost As Much As I Do!

Otto loves Helaena almost as much as I do!

Credit: @TheneverlandG on twitter

I‘d say that‘s generally the green experience these days.

The emotional rollercoaster of fluctuating between utter despair, disgust, and hopelessness to pure childlike elation within two days is what it feels to be an Alicole shipper

Now I know this is purely a headcanon, but Alicent‘s rage at Aegon would make a lot mire sense if he and Aemond shared a room. We see Baela and Rhaena share one so it isn‘t completely unreasonable.

If that were the case Aegon _should_ have noticed Aegon sneaking out and either prevented it or gone with him. But he didn‘t because he was pass-out-drunk.

people on tiktok and twitter are the most purposely obtuse people that i have ever seen.

and with the things people keep saying about blood & cheese, it has only gotten worse. now if what people are saying is true i am going to be unhappy, but people are still using it to misconstrue the past events of driftmark when aemond lost his eye.

people have started placing blame on alicent and criston for not being there and while i do agree that the adults have a lot of blame in this incident it is not there. alicent was not there because she was in bed. where the kids were SUPPOSED TO BE. just because she is their mother does not mean that she needs to be awake 24/7 watching them. notice how viserys is not getting any of the blame there?

people are saying that since criston’s a kingsguard he should’ve been there since he is supposed to protect the whole family, and that is partially true. he is supposed to protect the whole family, but he is sworn to ALICENT, which means that when she is asleep he is supposed to keep watch over her. he cannot possibly watch every single member of the family at once, which is why there are multiple members of the kingsguard. this means that there should have been another member of the kingsguard assigned to the kids unless viserys never bothered, which i would not be surprised by.

now onto alicent asking aegon where he was. i do not agree with her here, but people are not understanding why she did this.

1. all of the children besides aegon and helaena (and joffrey) were there, so why wasn’t aegon? because he was drunk and passed out. now that doesn’t mean that he should be punished for being asleep like he was supposed to be, but when your younger son lost an eye when he got 4 v 1’d it might be a little irritating that the reason your oldest wasn’t there is because he was passed out drunk. still not his fault.

2. alicent has been trying to make aegon see the danger that he and his siblings are in and trying to make him take responsibility to protect them as the oldest and he has resisted and now he has “failed” and aemond lost an eye. agree with her actions or not, but she is trying to save her children’s lives even if it backfires.

now rhaenyra and daemon. people get upset that rhaenrya gets blame when alicent doesn’t. and while i get that since they both shouldn’t have to watch their children sleep to make sure they don’t get up to anything after they’ve been sent to bed, i do think people need to remember that their situations are a little different.

alicent sent her children to bed and wasn’t there because she also went to bed. rhaenrya sent her children to bed and wasn’t there because she went to sleep with her uncle at his wife’s funeral. let me repeat that. SHE AND DAEMON FUCKED AT HIS WIFE’S FUNERAL. THAT IS THE PROBLEM, at least for me. maybe i would be more sympathetic there if laena was cold in her damn grave before they did the horizontal tango.

now all in all i hope you all realize that this situation is a little more complicated than people act like and that if you’re going to blame anyone blame, viserys because really this is all his fault.

Guinevere and Lancelot's Sex

(an overview so we can be on the same page when discussing Alicent and Criston's sex)

I've been looking into the history of courtly love for quite a while now, trying to figure out where the "chaste" bit comes from. And honestly I'm still not sure. (My best theory at the moment is that it was Elizabeth I's contribution?) Histories consistently trace courtly love to The Knight of the Cart, the OG Guinevere and Lancelot story — a story where they do have sex.

They are the poster children. And they have always been unambiguously sexual.

The Knight of the Cart

Queen Guinevere and Lancelot have sex about halfway through The Knight of the Cart. At this point, Lancelot has traveled for a week and braved all sorts of hurdles to come rescue Guinevere, who's being held captive. He wants to have sex with her, but he does not expect sex from her — he doesn't think he's owed anything. This is expressed in this line:

"It would take more than these bars to keep me out. Nothing but your command could thwart my power to come to you. If you will but grant me your permission, the way will open before me. But if it is not your pleasure, then the way is so obstructed that I could not possibly pass through."

A reminder that The Knight of the Cart was commissioned by a woman, Marie de Champagne. This is a female fantasy — and specifically, the fantasy of a noblewoman who's in a political marriage where sex is presumbably expected and owed.

So Guinevere says yes, he climbs through her window, and they have sex. It's written "fade to black" style, but the author does tell us they had a great time.

Their sport is so agreeable and sweet, as they kiss and fondle each other, that in truth such a marvellous joy comes over them as was never heard or known. But their joy will not be revealed by me, for in a story, it has no place. Yet, the most choice and delightful satisfaction was precisely that of which our story must not speak.

I've seen too much discourse where Criston wanting to worship Alicent and have sex with her are framed as if they're in opposition or mutually incompatible. Which just — no. Lancelot kneels to Guinevere in an explicitly religious way, both when he enters the room to have sex with her, and before he leaves.

then he comes to the bed of the Queen, whom he adores and before whom he kneels, holding her more dear than the relic of any saint. .... When he leaves the room, he bows and acts precisely as if he were before a shrine; then he goes with a heavy heart, and reaches his lodgings without being recognised by any one.

…And guilty of conspiracy to commit murder … and a sexual predator …and incompetent …and married to a serial rapist, pedophile, murderer (thrice over by now) …and sheltering a terrorist.

it's always both sides are bad :( when one of them is a rapist incompetent usurper and the other is... a woman

FABIEN FRANKEL TALKING ABOUT ALICENT AND CRISTON COLE'S RELATIONSHIP.