Recharging My Batteries

Recharging My Batteries

Clearly I’ve been slipping on keeping up with tumblr - which sucks because I love the people, the fics and the artwork!! “Real life” has been really taking its toll and I’ve mentally just been super frazzled. 

Thankfully, I work at an amazing place that treats us beyond spectacularly. A few years ago they instituted a “perk” that every five years employees are granted 30 days straight of fully paid leave, on top of the vacation days we earn every year. They call it “Recharge”. I switched teams right after my 5th anniversary and was so jazzed by my new work and new team that I postponed my Recharge. And postponed it. And postponed it...

Well I am excited to say that the time has come and I’ve decided to take my 30 days!! Well actually last Monday was my first day but my body has protested my treatment of it and I’ve been mostly sleeping and nursing headaches :P 

What this all means is I hope to have plenty of time to catch up on the amazing fics and artwork, to “harass” the wonderful folks with fic ideas or fangirl-ing! If anyone wants to recommend any authors/artists/fics/anything please ping me or comment so that I can be sure to check them out! 

I look forward to bugging everyone until ya’ll are sick of me!! And who knows, maybe my muse will play nice and I’ll even start writing again!!

If fanfic writers ever needed a charter, this is it.

what are we meant to do after infinity war?

Post Infinity War (No Spoilers)

MCU Fandom:

CAMP 1: Saw Infinity War

CAMP 2: Haven’t seen Infinity War

PROPOSED NEW CAMP: THINKING ABOUT HOW AMAZING AVENGERS 4 WILL BE

Shout Out Sunday - Week 2:

I had a hard time deciding which imaginary boyfriend to indulge myself in this weekend. Poe? Bucky? Steve Rogers? In the end I figured screw it and dove into the GIGANTIC library that is @propertyofpoeandbucky‘s masterlists!

First, let me say I’m bias here (though I am for everyone that has been/will be featured here cuz they’re all amazing). @propertyofpoeandbucky never fails to perk up a bad day for me. First of all, the freaking tagline on her account: you cannot escape de poe always leaves me in stitches and with Oscar Issac’s voice in my head - what a freaking way to start! Second she is basically the queen of AUs, as such she manages to cover most of my favorite tropes with my favorite boys. 

I can’t even begin to name a favorite because I’ll feel as though I’ll be betraying her other work, but for those curious I’m going to have say for Poe:  

Dare you not to grin AU: Pour Some Sugar On Me

Holy sexy hell AU: Fashion Baby

Heartstrings tug AU: Bring Her Back*

*Note that I’ve begged for a follow up on this one and it hasn’t happened, but the begging shall continue!

For Bucky:

Dare you not to love this one: The Princess Project (Mini-Series)

All the angst: Match Made in Heaven

*happy sigh*: Will You?

For Steve:

All the fluff AU: You and Me Together (Mini-Series)

She also has a ton of other characters and fandoms she writes for, kinda a one stop shop here and I adore her for it <3

I very much feel as though I’m channeling my inner Luis at the moment because holy geez, give @tintinwrites a request and somehow magic happens! Seriously though, not only do I get to read a Poe fic (YAY!), that takes place in a very SVU-verse (double YAY!) but somehow some of my most inner thoughts/worries are somehow channeled through the heroine of the fic! It’s like you read my mind @tintinwrites!! 

the wasted years | Modern Poe Dameron x Reader

Request: “Modern AU Poe and a couple of coworkers go to a small theater and see PotO (your choice if it’s the play or movie). At the end of the night everyone says their goodbyes and Poe + heroine start walking in the same direction to get to their respective homes. Poe notices the heroine is quieter than normal and finds her emotional over the Phantom’s outcome  (she identifies with him? perhaps self esteem about her looks or just having zero luck in finding love, <insert reason here>). Bonus points if somehow their attraction to one another comes out and they get together!” from @imaginecrushes

A/N: I like it when people let me tap into my love of PotO! Also, why do I keep imagining them being part of SVU that MAKES NO SENSE

Rating: T

Warning: Low self-esteem?

Word count: 1,000, apparently!

Prompt: This is from the above request, but it also falls right into place with ‘Value Me: a drabble about one character telling another how they feel about them’ (requested by an anon from this list of prompts)

Summary: You relate way too much to the Phantom and Poe tells you why you shouldn’t.

The tickets were given to you by someone who was grateful for what your team had done for them; they worked on the show or something and wanted to show their appreciation beyond the mandatory payment.

Leia had no need for them, so she gave them to her ‘four hardest-working team members’ and even went so far as to give you all the night off. Poe fought her, telling her that there were people who needed your help, but she pointed out that there were no cases and that the four of you deserved a night off. If anything came in, she would give it to people who didn’t get as much work, especially Rey, the impressive new girl.

Poe was sulking because he loved his work so much, Finn was excited since he had never seen a musical before, and you and Rose conversed the whole way about how great it was going to be.

And it was great. It was beautiful, and moving, and spectacular, and full of talent.

It also broke your heart. The way the Phantom was mocked and hated all his life, just to give up the one thing that showed him kindness, was portrayed so beautifully. You might have cried, and Poe gently bumped his shoulder into yours, smiling at you.

But it wasn’t just the words, and the music, and the plot, and the wonderful acting that got to you.

You saw a little, tiny, minuscule, small bit of yourself in the Phantom.

Not that you were some insane genius who lived in a cellar and murdered people to get their way, but still.

You understood that loneliness. That ache that came with never being properly loved.

Your family was dysfunctional, of course. Then there were the more romantic relationships in your life; they were few and far between. One in high school, a couple in college, one more before you became busy with your work, and only a few since then.

Most of them were short-lived, and the long term ones weren’t all that great either. They all ended with a broken heart and a lot of tears.

And the one constant in all of them? You.

The one reason for breaking up given to you by each significant other? Something to do with you.

Except for that one relationship in high school. That one had to do with hormones and teenagers’ lack of forgiveness.

Other than that, all you. The lack of a successful relationships left behind a lonely person who laid in their empty bed most nights, wondering how to be more wanted.

“That was awesome,” Finn exclaimed as you left the theater. “Those high notes!”

“Yeah, it was.” Poe had brightened up considerably after realizing that he had the night off for something enjoyable.

“It’s late. Walk me home, Finn?”

“Sure. See you guys tomorrow.”

Finn and Rose walked off, the latter saying something about how the musical showed the effects of a cruel society.

“I’ll walk you home since we, uh, live in the same building.” Poe walked on ahead while you nodded slightly and paused before following, wrapped up in your thoughts.

You did live in the same building, though on different floors.

“Nice night. The show was pretty good, huh? What’d you think? Aside from the part where you cried.” His tone was teasing and his smile dropped when he looked at you. “Hey. What’s wrong?”

You snapped out of your thoughts, looking at him. “What? Nothing. Just thinking.”

“About what? The look on your face…”

“Nothing, just…the Phantom and how…I know he was a bad guy, but I don’t know, he was just so lonely and just…I don’t know.”

“Hey.” He stepped in front of you. “You okay?”

Of course he had to ask that, the one question that could break anyone’s dam when their emotions were trying to get past it. “Oh, fuck, stop. Stop.” You pinched the bridge of your nose, fighting back tears as you quickly moved to sit on a bench. “It’s so stupid.” You gave a small sob.

He sat down next to you, watching you with a frown. “What is it?”

“I get him. Nobody loves him and he’s so alone—oh, God, I identify with a murderer who lives in a basement.” You hurriedly wiped away the tears that were starting to fall.

“How the hell can you identify with him?”

“I’m alone, Poe.” You looked at him. “You know, I’ve had so many relationships, and they all ended with, 'Maybe if you didn’t…’ or, 'Maybe if you had…’. I’m always too much or too little, and I don’t know how to fix it. I try to be a better…person…” Your voice hitched slightly with a sob. “And I still end up in an empty apartment, in an empty bed, with my empty self. I’m all alone because there’s something wrong with me.”

He stayed silent for a long moment. “The only thing wrong with you is that you keep dating assholes.” He held a finger up when you opened your mouth to speak. “You aren’t too much or too little anything. I mean, yeah, you have flaws, but everyone does. Even me.” You laughed softly, he gave you a smirk. “But there’s nothing wrong with you. You’re the funniest, smartest, toughest, most gorgeous person I’ve ever met.”

“You’re just trying to make me happy.”

“No, I’m telling you something I should’ve told you a long time ago, but I was too preoccupied with work. You know how much I’d love coming home to you in my empty bed?”

“Really?” You looked at him hopefully because sweet, sexy Poe was kind of telling you he liked you.

“Really.”

You licked your lips, moving a little closer. “I think you’re the funniest, kindest, bravest, most handsome person I’ve ever met. I never thought you’d ever…”

“Well, I do.” He glanced at your lips.

You closed the distance and kissed him gently.

Shamelessly, your bed wasn’t exactly empty that night.

I won’t be around on Tumblr until midday Friday in an attempt to prevent *Avengers: Infinity War* from being spoiled (either accidentally or intentionally). Tumblr spoiled White Wolf for me a few months ago and I don’t want to have it happen again. 

I will try and stay up on my direct messages on here -- I should be able to avoid spoilers to do so, but if you want to be 100% certain to get ahold of me on my AO3 account: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cathain_Baldwin/profile

See you in about 35 hours!