[Two Men Are Standing In A Parking Lot]

[Two men are standing in a parking lot]

Man 1: Yo dude there's a cool ass dog over there!

Man 2: Holy shit you're right dude! There is a cool ass dog over there!

[Camera pans to show a dog wearing sunglasses and a backwards cap sitting on a skateboard]

Man 1: Hell yeah!

[Both men both go and pet the Cool Ass Dog Over There and shower them with praise and affection]

Cool Ass Dog Over There: Ruff!

[Cool Ass Dog Over There skates away. The two men look at each other confused and shrug in unison]

[The two men are about to leave when one hears rumbling in the distance]

Man 1: Yo dude, you hear that?

Man 2: Yeah dude.

[Both men turn to see Cool Ass Dog Over There riding in from the sunset they both graffitied on the Wallmart with a wagon attached to their skateboard]

Both men: Yo it's the Cool Ass Dog Over There!

[Cool Ass Dog Over There stops their skateboard in front of the two men]

Man 2: What's up dude!

Cool Ass Dog Over There: I wish to thank you two for granting me a name. I find it to be unfair that your gift to me has not been given to you two yet, so I shall grant you your own names as payment. Man 1, you will now be known as Liam R Manwell; and for man 2, I name thee Thomas H Parker. I hope you both find those names fitting. And as payment for all the head pats and belly rubs you gave me, I have something for both of you that I hope you appreciate.

[Cool Ass Dog Over There pulls a sheet off of the wagon, revealing two pairs of sunglasses, caps, skateboards and a pack of pacific cooler caprisuns]

Liam R Manwell: Thanks a lot dude! I love them!

Thomas H Parker: Yeah! This is awesome!

Cool Ass Dog Over There: One might even say radical, Thomas H Parker.

[Cool Ass Dog Over There rides off into the sunset Liam R Manwell and Thomas H Parker graffitied on Wallmart]

Both Liam R Manwell and Thomas H Parker: Thank you Cool Ass Dog Over There!

Cool Ass Dog Over There: Thank you and farewell, Liam R Manwell and Thomas H Parker!

[Camera pans to a person of unknown gender holding an infant behind Liam R Manwell and Thomas H Parker]

Person: What in the actual frick just happened!?

Narrator: And the Cool Ass Dog Over There, grateful for Liam R Manwell and Thomas H Parker's kindness and gratitude, continued to visit them once every month, giving them more pacific cooler caprisuns and even-

Person: What the h e double hockey sticks who's saying that!?

Narrator: Excuse me, I was talking. Now as I was saying, Cool Ass Dog Over There continued to visit Liam R Manwell and Thomas H Parker once every month, giving them pacific cooler caprisuns and even cookies sometimes. The end.

Tags

long post short story i am so fucking proud of this cool ass dog over there cadot liam r manwell thomas h parker i love you Cool Ass Dog Over There also Liam R Manwell and Thomas H Parker sound like the Da vinki guys from that ticktock also Cool Ass Dog Over There is bisexual and agender and uses they/it/she