Inb4denn - HI TUMBLR, I'M DAD.

me and the boys waiting to get tickets for Barbie on opening day

Objectivism is a shit philosophy and Atlas Shrugged is a shit book. These are some of the things I've learned from both John Green and Mike Schur.

To any of my aspiring writers out there, if J.D. Vance can do it then it's not nearly as hard as you think it is.

"I think I should be offended," she said as her eyes scanned over the red and black checkered pattern of the flannel. It was the very essence of lumberjack chic, the kind that you see hanging in every big box store. The fabric felt nice between her fingers, though, so probably Target rather than Walmart. Thank goodness for small miracles. He waved his hands as if he was trying to swat the idea out of the air. "Don't act like that," he said. "It looks just like the one you wore in college. It's like a lesbian calling card, right?" She scoffed. "Ok, stereotypes," she said, dropping the shirt onto the table. "I was still FIRMLY in the closet in college. The flannel was for that stupid Al Borland fan club you started." He crossed himself and pointed to the sky.

"RIP the GOAT," he replied. "Richard Karn is still alive," she said, brows furrowed. "Yes, but Al Borland ISN'T. Just another innocent lost in the wake of known snitch, Tim Allen," he said with a sigh. His eyes fell to the flannel for a moment and then rose to meet hers again. "So... it's not like the Bat Signal for lesbians?"

"I don't think so, Tim," she said, shaking her head.

"Well," he sighed, reaching across the table for the shirt, "I guess I’ll just retur-"

She snatched it from his hands. "No sir," she said. "A gift is still a gift. Besides, I've got a date tonight." "I knew it!"

Prompt #1114

“It’s like the Bat Signal for lesbians.”