I'm A Lover (aroace) And A Fighter (I Will Run Away With My Tail Between My Legs At The First Sign Of

I'm a lover 😌 (aroace) and a fighter (I will run away with my tail between my legs at the first sign of conflict)

Idk why I keep getting milestones but the dopamine boost is cool

Too bad it'll probably run out soon

tw: theft, body horror, facial disfigurement

Hee hoo I got your nose!🫰👃

*releases pack of dads into home depot* go……be free

So it's a non fantasy au and King has all of his complex thoughts and shit but also is King even King if not fluffy?

GUYS I AM HERE TO BLESS YOU WITH MY VERSION OF ALFRED CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES WHICH HAVE BEEN PERFECTED AFTER MONTHS OF WORK

chile anyways

so ur gonna start off with 1/2 a cup of sugar, 3/4 a cup of brown sugar and two pinches of salt.

throw it together in a large bowl and mix it out using ur hands to get all the clumps out

i swear never use a utensil to mix anything while baking always do it with ur hands it tastes better trust me.

next ur gonna melt around a 100 grams of butter so just under half a cup

now what u wanna do is pour the butter into the sugar while its still hot then get up in there with some elbow grease and mix into the sugar until it has a sludge like texture and there are no clumps,

remember the butter must still be hot while u mix it up, not like boiling or anything but still hot <3

1 egg, throw it in there again mix it up, (for the love of god have some fun in life and keep mixing with ur hands its so much fun and it actually tastes so much better some how call it putting some love into ur baking, or even take ur anger out on the batter, its rlly therapeutic.)

next a cap of vanilla or a dash or whatever however much feels right

2 pinches of baking powder

and then 1 and 1/4 cup of flour, all together

then again in with your hands mix it up and put some elbow grease in there

now the chocolate chips, yum.

theres no fucking measurement for it, you measure that shit with your heart, just keep pouring till it feels right and looks right, and dont be afraid to snag a few chocolate chips here and there while you pour <33

oke so now ur gonna throw a lid on the bowl or wrap it with ceran wrap and throw it in the fridge for minimum an hour, the longer you leave it the better it tastes but max like 3 and 1/2 hours, i typically leave mine in for 1 and a 1/2 to 2 hours.

then your gonna take it out, let it soften for 5 minutes while your preheat your oven at 180C or 350F

then your gonna put parchment paper on the tray u’ll be baking on

then get ur cookie dough and start rolling it into whatever size balls feel right and place them on the tray.

then pop those babies in the oven for 15 minutes and let em bake, but dont forget to check in after 10 minutes.

take em outta the oven once its done, let it rest for like two minutes then pop them on the tray and leave em alone for like 5 or so minutes more

and voila ready to eat <33

they’ll have that crunch to them and still be soft on the inside without being raw so like best of both worlds

Also dont be afraid to make a mess while you bake, its half the fun and you can always clean up later <33

I'm going to-

*remember my friend doesn't want me making suicide jokes*

... go write angst fanfiction that ends in characters getting the comfort and healing that I won't let myself get.

Guys congratulate me I'm less sui-

*remembers my friend doesn't want me making suicide references*

...less in denial from last year.