I Was Today Years Old When I Learned That When You Type Otp: True In AO3 Search Results It Filters Out

I was today years old when I learned that when you type “otp: true” in AO3 search results it filters out fics with additional ships, leaving only the fics where your otp is the main ship

I'm having fun posting these every week even if I never seem to actually hit Wednesday, so how about another snippet? ^_^ This part comes after the night of the Donghai battle the next morning on the beach.

[Other snippets of this fic that have been shared, not necessarily in fic canon order.]

*

Di Feisheng woke to the sound of water: the soft susurrus of the waves against the shore, the steady patter of light raindrops hitting the sand and lighter plinks where they hit the ocean.  A quiet groan soon joined those sounds as he rolled himself onto his back, the aches and pains of last night's adventures making themselves heard loud and clear over all the others.  He pried open his eyes to the treacherous clouds overhead, hanging low and heavy and promising more rain for those unwary enough to be caught out in it a second time.  They'd have to move soon.  If Li Xiangyi were any more capable of it than he felt right now.  Easing back onto his side, Di Feisheng stretched his free hand over to reach for Li Xiangyi's wrist… and froze.

Li Xiangyi was gone.

Barely a breath later, Di Feisheng was on his feet, aches and pains forgotten, the robes that had been draped over him in his sleep pooling onto the sand.  He scanned the beach, gaze skipping from sand dune to sand dune, cursing the rain that had wiped away any traces of where Li Xiangyi might have gone.  The man could have turned into a ghost and floated away for all the surrounding terrain gave clues of his whereabouts.  He was just… gone.

The blast of a cold wind brought with it the sting of a thousand grains of sand, a harsh reminder to search out what articles of clothing he could find and make use of them.  He found both shoes, though he seemed to be minus one sock, all of his underlayers save the Yinzhou armor, and both of his outer layers.  His dao, he found, had been safely within reach of where he'd awoken.  Li Xiangyi's clothes were missing, as was his sword.  All of this gave him hope that Li Xiangyi had at least left the beach under his own power—or their combined power, as the case might be—but where could the man have gone?  They might have saved him from immediate death last night, but that didn't mean he was out of danger.

Once he had collected himself and his belongings, Di Feisheng pulled a golden whistle from an inner pocket of his robes.  Wuyan was never far from him, and he had never yet failed to answer his lord's call.  If there was one man in the entire world who understood the meaning of loyalty, it was him.  He would come now, too.

Di Feisheng had no sooner finished cresting the dunes back onto the more solid footing of the road than Wuyan caught up to him, dipping his head in a perfunctory bow before raising his eyes to roam Di Feisheng's figure.  Apparently satisfied with what he saw, he relaxed his posture, awaiting instructions.  Neither was fond of wasting breath on pleasantries or questions, especially ones that were unnecessary.  Doing him the same courtesy of coming straight to the point, Di Feisheng said, "Li Xiangyi.  You saw him leave and said nothing?"

Wuyan's eyebrow lifted, a brief, sardonic smile crossing his lips before he answered.  "My lord, he was already gone when I arrived.  I have been running interference to keep Jiao-guniang from finding you all evening.  I assumed you wouldn't want… unexpected company."

A sneer twisted Di Feisheng's lips before he could control it.  "You assumed correctly."  He sighed.  "There's no help for it, then.  Two can search more efficiently than one and he can't have gone far in his condition.  We'll just have to track him down."

Three hours later, with a sinking certainty that one determined fool could, in fact, have gotten much further in his condition than he should have been able to, Di Feisheng was nearly ready to admit defeat and change tactics.  But just as he was about to call Wuyan back to his side to regroup, the twin of his golden whistle let out a piercing cry from back on the beach.

Di Feisheng wasted no further time, leaping into the air and speeding towards the source of that sound.

Why i didn't notice that these motherfukers

Are the split image of these other motherfukers

Pls cast Cheng Yi and Xiao Shunyao for tye live action I BEG YOU

Ok now we have a booping feature I propose to tumblr next ides of March we have a stabbing counter and the person with the most stabs gets crowned Caesar and the blog with the most stabbings gets crowned Brutus

As promised, the Escort AU is now up on AO3. I will probably post new parts on Tumblr first, and then compile them to AO3, but if people have other thoughts, let me know.

Fandom: 莲花楼 | Mysterious Lotus Casebook (TV)

Relationship: Di Feisheng/Li Lianhua | Li Xiangyi

Characters: Di Feisheng, Li Lianhua | Li Xiangyi, Shan Gudao

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Sex Work, Oral Sex, Anal Sex, Fingerfucking, Nipple Play, Dirty Talk, Teasing, Consent is Sexy, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, Spreadsheets, (is a canonical tag btw good job everyone)

(Title from Gett Off by Prince, it's delightfully cheerful filth appealed to me.)

So tonight I joined my parents, and the neighbours, at the local pub quiz. We won, and won the bonus round, much to the annoyance of the other teams. Apparently my parents and their friends win every other week. Nerds. So to prank them the landlord had a special “Super Hard Pub Question” for us for double or nothing on our prize (vouchers for a gallon of beer) to let the rest of the pub feel better because we were “guaranteed to lose” since there was “no way we could know the answer.” I got picked to answer it because I’m the youngest and have less General Knowledge.

The question?

“What is the word for beer in Ancient Egyptian?”

Pub: *loud raucous laughter and cheering*

Landlord: *looks smug*

Me: Do you want that in English or in the original Hieroglyphs?

Landlord: The hieroglyphs of course!

Pub: *more laughter*

Me: *scribbles quickly in the 10 seconds I had to answer*

Landlord: Fuck. Me. 

Pub: *utter silence broken only by someone at the back exclaiming WTF* 

Landlord: How did you even know that?

Me: You picked the one person here who can read them?

Landlord: Oh shit it’s you isn’t it?

Dad yelling from the back: SURPRISEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

It’s safe to say we’re simultaneously fucking legends/not very popular at the local right now.