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미안해 •| ᶜʰᵒᶤ ʸᵉᵒⁿʲᵘⁿ |• [ ᵖᵃʳᵗ ² ]

Since the first explosion I could not stop thinking about you. I promised myself to do my best to get out of this situation safely, but I could't ignore the cries for help. 

I tried to be selfish, to think only of myself. But it was impossible. You would do the same. So I did it for you, for me. For them.  

They were scared. 

There was fire and smoke after every explosion. 

Don't leave me, don't let me go. 

I don't remember how many times I left that makeshift shelter. I went out in search of more people, I didn't want to leave anyone behind. 

I went out again. I had to be sure no one was at risk. I could not forgive myself if someone lost their life. I checked again one by one the rooms where I was able to enter. Screaming for a sign. 

It was getting harder and harder to breathe, the smoke burned in my lungs with every breath. But I couldn't stop, not now, not yet. 

My vision was getting dimmer and dimmer because of the dust and smoke mixed in the atmosphere. In certain areas I was beginning to feel a hellish heat, caused by the fire left by each explosion. Large chunks of concrete were falling everywhere, this would not last much longer. 

I stopped for a moment, just to take a look around me. And I was afraid. For the first time since the disaster started, I was scared. Afraid of leaving you alone, afraid of never seeing you again. 

I'm sure you're worried. I have to find a way out. It could take hours for the rescuers to reach us. 

I decided to go back to check on the others, when I felt a strong jolt. I stopped again and inspected my surroundings, everything looked normal, as far as I could tell. One step, that was all; one step and I felt a great weight on me. 

Everything went black.  

I needed to see your face, I needed to look into your eyes. I would like to be next to you, because when I look into your eyes everything seems better.        

I feel like breathing my last breath. Don't worry because everything will be alright.  I only have one life and I want to live it with you. 

I know you feel fear baby, I feel the same way. 

I sink deeper into this immense darkness. I begin to forget the way you used to look at me. I put my heart in your hands, I give you my soul to take care of. Could you forgive me for my mistakes, please! I am so grateful for the time we spent together. 

You became my everything. My soul is now at peace.

My only wish [ Sunoo ]

The small candles on the cake were the only thing that gave light to the room.

It felt so lonely, so empty. I moved forward at a slow pace until I was in front of it.

It was a nice cake, but if I had no one to share it with, what was the point? I closed my eyes thinking about my wish, even though at that moment my only wish was for him to be by my side.

I kept my eyes closed for a moment longer, feeling how the tears bathed my face, feeling how they followed their well-known path down my cheeks.

It was sad to be here, in an empty apartment, with a heart flooded with feelings. I was aware that this could happen, I knew this was going to happen.

A soft melody flooded the place, causing more tears to stream down my face. If he were here he would sing for me.

I thought of him, I thought of his voice, how sweet he is and how much I love him.

And soon the place was invaded by the memory of his voice, singing and laughing, the memories in my mind, the memories of love.

And she felt so alive, so present, I could feel her hugging my heart.

More tears fell from my eyes, I missed him so much, I missed him so much. Then it was like waking up from a dream, her hands on my waist forming an embrace and her voice filling my senses. His chin resting on my shoulder.

—Please don't cry, I'm here.— A sea of emotions invaded my being, I couldn't believe he was really there.

미안해 •| ᶜʰᵒᶤ ʸᵉᵒⁿʲᵘⁿ |• [ ᵖᵃʳᵗ ¹ ]

It's been hours since you left home. It's been hours since that stupid argument. But not being here is part of your job, I know.

You were right, it's your room and only you know how you keep it tidy.  Even though I was right too, it's a mess. You should take the time to tidy up a little better. 

It's been a while since I last called you. I asked you to have dinner together, a truce to fix this stupid situation.  You refused my request. 

You're still upset, I could feel it in your voice.

The door to the apartment burst open, giving way to the thunderous voices of the boys coming in, playing and shouting. But you weren't there.

Why did you have to, why if everyone else was leaving did you have to stay? Why did you?

Heuning and Beomgyu went straight into the kitchen, looking for something to eat while it was time for dinner. Soobin took a seat next to me on the spacious sofa. Taehyun walked slowly in our direction after locking the door informing me that Soobin and Heuning had planned to go to the movies before dinner, mentioning that they had only stopped by the apartment to change. But he didn't mention you.

I struck up a conversation with the guys, trying to forget the fact that I felt rejected by you.  

Beomgyu zapped at the TV, while Taehyun fought with him for not allowing him to see what was on some channel. Soobin and Heuning had long since left, excited because the movie they would be attending looked very promising.

The next moment Beomgyu and Taehyun's voices stopped as did the constant switching on the TV. They had finally left a channel. But it felt strange the abrupt change of mood.

I turned in their direction and they looked like they had seen a ghost, frozen with their eyes glued to the TV.  As I prepared to take a look at what had caused their reaction, Taehyun obstructed my point of view and started talking very fast while trying to pull me along with him.

What was wrong with him? I was about to protest when the words of the person behind the TV set froze me in my tracks.

"A second explosion is reported at HYBE entertainment agency. The trapped people could not be rescued yet. Rescue bodies report that they expect 3 to 6 more explosions to happen due to the rupture of several gas lines. So far at least 10 people are reported trapped." 

The three of us kept silent.

Beomgyu changed the channel again, his hands were shaking, we all knew you were there.   

"It is reported that 2 or 4 people could be found lifeless. This is due to the difficult situation and that the location does not lend itself to a safe rescue. Viewers are asked not to be present at the site, as this could cause even more chaos than what is already there. This is primarily directed at all the young women who are crowding around the company in search of information about members of various groups in the company."

Why if I asked you to have dinner together did you have to turn me down? Why do you have to allow your pride to go so far?

One more change.

"The area affected by the explosions is reported to be on the central floors of the building, the area where the agency's practice rooms and locker rooms are stipulated to be located. So far, no injuries or people trapped in the few debris generated on the lower floors have been reported. It is reported that at least 7 people were on that floor at the time of the incident. All the victims have been identified, 4 or more of them could be company personnel and we have the report that 2 of them could be idols. We are not allowed to inform who they are or what group they belong to, to avoid increasing hysteria among fans."

I know it's you, I know because you haven't called yet. If we hadn't argued you'd be with me now. But you're not.

Another change.

"A successful rescue of 3 people has just been carried out, they were found trapped inside one of the elevators of the place, none of them has any serious injuries or damage."

The transmission was cut for several seconds after a loud noise was recorded by the microphones that were in place. When the signal came back on, the reporter was a little further away from the scene and had a frightened look on his face.

"We have just witnessed a new explosion, the rescue corps reports that this explosion can generate a collapse in the construction. Because of the previous explosions the foundations of the site were damaged. So far a large amount of debris has fallen, which will further delay the rescue of the victims of this disastrous accident."

Another one.

Everyone's nerves are on edge, Taehyun still hasn't let go of me, and I really appreciate it because his touch is the only thing that keeps me still standing and not on the verge of collapse.

The door to the apartment opens again, our eyes traveled to that point and for a moment no one came in and it kindles in me the hope that it is you, that you had reached to leave the Company before all this happened. Then Heuning enters, letting out little sighs, a sign that he was crying, followed by Soobin. Again, not you.

—Take your things, we'll go to the company.—

Soobin's request was in a calm voice, but no one moved, we just exchanged glances.

—¡MOVE!—

Beomgyu's shout brought us out of our state. Tae let go of me, from then on it was all a race, the boys looking to change clothes and everyone fighting for the toilet.

I went to your room, I felt calm, I wasn't scared, I wasn't afraid, and the thought of panicking had left me. 

I guess I hadn't quite assimilated the fact that you are trapped in a building at risk of collapse. Because there can be no other explanation for the fact that I was so calm.

I went to the closet and grabbed two sweatshirts. One was obviously for me, it was cool at this time of night. The other is for you, because when you left the house this morning you didn't have one with you and you're probably a little chilly. 

When I returned to the living room, the TV was already off and the boys were standing near the door.

They were waiting for me.

•

On the walk to the company many doubts assaulted me. Will you be okay? Did you suffer any damage? Did something even worse happen in there? Will you still be alive?

With all these thoughts in mind, I began to experience a strong pressure in my chest, everything around me spun and the boys' conversation began to be heard in the distance. I had to call you, I had to know you were okay.

You couldn't leave me now, you couldn't go away upset because of that stupid argument, I started a desperate search for my cell phone, but that was the moment when I started to feel short of breath.

Was this a panic attack?

I could see the worried faces of the guys who were almost on top of me. They all spoke at once and it was impossible for me to understand what they were trying to say.

Taehyun pushed them all away and helped me into a better position so that it was possible for me to breathe.

—You need to calm down, breathe...—

There were no words of encouragement, it wasn't an "Everything will be okay" and it certainly wasn't a "He's safe". Why we didn't know, we didn't know how you were doing and we had no idea what we would find when we got there.

When we finally arrived the boys came down immediately, but I didn't know what to do, would I be able to keep calm now that I had the real version of the event in front of my eyes?

I need you by my side, now I realize how much I really love you.

This morning that you left we didn't say goodbye... we didn't say goodbye, we didn't give each other a kiss. We didn't say "I love you".

While I was in that internal debate of how to take the situation a loud noise like a big thunder flooded the atmosphere. The hustle and bustle of the moment stopped, everyone was looking at that big damaged structure. And without being able to avoid it, I turned my gaze behind the glass to the same place.

A large part of the building had collapsed. The area around the site had been reduced to rubble.

Not far from us stood one of the reporters we had seen on television. He immediately settled down in front of the frame to report on the latest development.

A little further back was a group of firemen, one of whom was carrying a megaphone through which he began to instruct people to move away from the structure for safety.

I turned my attention to the reporter to hear his last words.

"After minutes of waiting, the collapse the authorities were talking about has happened. The rescue forces communicate that they expect to find the 7 people who were trapped lifeless. The weight of the debris is too much for anyone to have survived."

The Lieutenant in charge took the megaphone and made the announcement that woke me up from my state of shock.

—The explosions were on the central floors of the building, the columns of the site are already too badly damaged and the upper floors are beginning to collapse. There is no hope for a successful rescue.—

I immediately got out of the car, it couldn't be true, what we had just witnessed had to have been an illusion, this couldn't end like this.

I need to see you, I need to hold you. I need to tell you how much I love you, one more time.

I ran towards the building dodging all the agents that tried to stop me, if they didn't come in to get you I would, because I need to have you by my side.

Strong arms wrapped around me preventing me from continuing to run into the building. They held me close to his chest, which was rising and falling in agitation, he had run after me. And there, in the warmth of that embrace a new hope grew within me. But I didn't want to turn around and find out again that it wasn't you.

— You need to stop, you can't do something like this, what do you think you can do for him once you're in there? You couldn't do anything.—

Soobin's voice came directly from the one who was holding me, so.... Again it wasn't you.

I felt my heart sink in a sea of anguish. Why aren't you here with me yet? What are you waiting for? Come on, get out of there.

•

"All night has passed and rescue teams have still not found any people trapped under the wreckage."

"After what seems to be 12 hours of the tragedy, the rescue teams have managed to stop the explosions and have also controlled the fires caused by these."

•

It's been more than 24 hours since I last saw you.

The guys dragged me back home, that I needed to sleep was their argument. But still, in the silence of the night, without you by my side, it was impossible for me to fall asleep.

I miss you.

Look at your room again. It is still the same as you left it yesterday morning. Your desk is full of notebooks and notes. On a chair and isolated in a corner is a pile of clothes, clean or dirty, I'm sure you don't even know. Sweatshirts and pants everywhere. And even as I'm admiring this mess again I think; are we really fighting over something so futile?

I need to hear from you.

I stood up slowly, I had to go there again. I needed news, and I didn't want to watch it through the TV, I had to be present on the spot.

I left your room ready to go back to the company. I left without making any noise, but when I got to the living room my plan went down the drain. Everyone was there, and judging by their expressions there was still no good news. I turned around and resignedly went back to the room.

I threw myself on your bed and without being able to help it I burst into tears. Why did this have to happen to us?

The sound of the door was like a whisper next to my uncontrollable sobs, this time that illusion that it was you didn't appear. I knew who it was.

Feeling the warmth of his embrace only made my crying increase. He didn't try to make me stop, he didn't comfort me, he didn't do anything like that. He did nothing but join me in my crying.

I knew that for the boys this was also a difficult situation. But of all of them, he was surely the one who was coping the worst, he also needed a support, but at this moment I couldn't be one, we were both equally broken.

I'm sorry Soobin, I'm sorry for not being able to comfort you.

part 2.   part 3

Could you give me your opinion about this little preview of the story I'm working on?

× Mick Schumacher is represented as Dethan Jones, and reader is represented as Adhara.

≻───── ⋆✩⋆ ─────≺

• Our Butterfly Effect •

A Mick Schumacher history

Time often goes by in strange ways... different ways, which makes it a bit complicated to understand. It's time and space. Is there one line or is it two? No matter how they run or if they curl, time and space are no obstacle for those who have been chosen, those to whom the universe gives a new chance; a strange way to meet the love of their life.

Second chances don't always exist, this could be something extraordinary in their lives, the last chance.

They don't know each other but their destinies are already fated to be together, they just have to meet... Across time.

Will Adhara be able to save Dethan? As the hands of the clock are turning, will they be capable of intertwining their times? following the line that connects them.

Fate and the universe have come together to offer them something like no other, like a shooting star, can their orbits finally meet?

≻───── ⋆✩⋆ ─────≺

So went their lives, on the day that destiny was to unite their paths, but something happened and now they must meet across time

ady-sideris city tour and coffee afternoon ☕

ady-sideris story

Deyjo13

Deyjo13 we got this! 🏍️

F1

F1

Scuderia Dreamers driver Dethan Jones suffered a serious accident this afternoon while taking part in the annual Monster Travel race in London.

The race was being held on one of the city's busy streets, despite protests to ban such races because of the risk they pose in the middle of the city's traffic.

× I need honest words, would anyone like to read it? I don't know where I'll publish it yet, because I'm a little afraid that nobody will like it

ɪғ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ ɪs sᴛɪʟʟ ᴍɪɴᴇ — [ ʜᴇᴜɴɪɴɢ ᴋᴀɪ ]

I wanted so much to stop time at this moment, the moonlight illuminated her face in a beautiful way and her eyes sparkled as she gazed at the star-filled sky. I felt infinitely happy to be with her right now, so much so that I didn't want it to end.

— Say it now.— I blurted out. She turned her face slightly towards me.

— What are you talking about Kai?.— I could detect the confusion on her face, she looked so tender.

— Tell me what you want, I'll give you anything.— We were having problems, it was all my fault. I was too focused on the band, the tour, the album, I had too many things, I was putting her aside. I wanted to make it up to her, I would give her anything she asked for.

— I want you.— Her answer didn't surprise me, but that's not what I was talking about.

— I don't mean that, just say it... I'll get it for you, I want to make up for all the time we haven't spent together.— She smiled sweetly as she shook her head slightly in denial.

— I don't need anything, just knowing that you're still with me makes me happy, you know that... Don't worry sweetheart, wherever you are, whatever you do. If your heart is still mine everything is fine...— She came even closer to me and I put my arms around her.

I loved her and could not believe that a girl like her would give me her heart so sincerely. She gave me her support and love unconditionally and I could only think that I didn't deserve it, but she was trying so hard to show me that I did.

I kissed her temple and then placed another kiss on her cheek.

— I love you.— She let out a small laugh and even though it seemed impossible, she moved even closer to me.

— I love you too.—

I never wanted this; Carlos Sainz

WARNING; Topics such as suicide, death and poisoning are mentioned.

I was in our room, crying. I couldn't believe it, it was all my fault.

On the TV the news about his disappearance was on repeat like a damaged record, the social networks were a chaos of theories and speculations, everyone seemed to want to know where Carlos had gone, and it was all my fault. I caused the fight that brought us to this moment in time, it was all my fault.

I knew it was only a matter of time before the police would be looking for me to ask their usual questions, but I was aware that if they noticed the house in chaos they would suspect me. I had to leave, at least while the first few hours of investigation passed. After that, I would have time, everything could go back to normal.

No one had to know, no one could find out that everything had been provoked by me.

I didn't want to be alone, I didn't want to face everything alone, so I took some of my things deciding that I would spend the night at my mother's house, she would be with me, she would comfort me and support me because she knows how much I love him.

When the call from the police arrived, they came to my mother's small but cozy house, they asked me some questions and I told them my husband's usual routine, which ended this time when they reported finding his sport car abandoned on an unknown stretch of road not frequented by him.

No one knew what had happened, the policemen were trying to advise me by the time I could receive a rescue call. They were all assuming that Carlos had been kidnapped and were waiting for whoever committed this act to look for me, to call me and ask for a large amount of money so that Carlos could be released alive. The agents who came to talk to me gave me so much advice to the point that I felt overwhelmed, I felt that with just a few words in front of them I would spoil everything and they would discover the truth, they would discover that it was all my fault.

When they finally left with the promise that if they found out anything they would inform me or if anyone contacted me I would come to them, I could breathe. I knew I had taken them off my hands for a few hours, I knew they would be out of my way for as long as it took. And with the Sainz family licking their chops with the media, this was my perfect opportunity to return home, to our home.

A home that was broken, hurt and wounded, but  ours.

As I tried to sort out everything that had happened, as I tried to bring everything back to the perfection that our home always projected, one by one, neighbors, friends and family knocked on the door, but I could not receive anyone, I had no time, everything was measured.

—I want to be alone—. That was what I shouted over and over again in response to the knocks on the door.

I needed to be alone, everything had come to an end. Things were decided, I would wear my wedding dress and he would wear his black suit and we would be happy once again, happy as when we started this life together. I would arrange everything, I would see to it that everything happened before anyone found out what was going on.

My dress lay on our bed, and the tuxedo next to him. I admired the view in front of me for a few seconds, there was no turning back now, there was no longer anything that could change the course this whole day in our lives had taken.

I turned around and went back to the first floor, I had to look for some things still, I had to make sure everything went well.

As I made my way to the first floor, there was another knock on the door, I stopped, I stood quietly on the stairs, I was exactly in front of the front door that I would not answer once again, hoping they would understand that I wanted to be alone and that I didn't want to be disturbed. But his voice came from the other side of the darkness.

—I know you're there, please let's talk—. A lump settled in my throat, it was Lando, Carlos' best friend. I couldn't see him, I couldn't face him, I was sure he would want to come in and stay with me until we knew what had happened with my husband and I couldn't allow that, I couldn't allow him to see it.

—No Lan, I don't want to talk to anyone, he's gone—. I was not able to control my emotions and I burst into tears.

—Hey, we'll find him, everything will be all right, okay?—. Lando couldn't understand at this moment, but Carlos had left not to come back and I had taken care of that.

—Lando, I want to be alone, could we meet later?—. I needed him to leave, I needed to be alone so I could put an end to all this.

—I understand, I'll call you in the morning, bye—. I heard her footsteps as he was leaving. With a big sigh I resumed my walk, while I admired each and every detail that flooded our house, our home.

I stopped in front of the stove, took a deep breath and took the courage to do it. One by one I turned all the knobs without turning on the burners, just allowing the gas to come out. At that moment many things went through my mind, all the memories of a life together seemed to play in front of me, soon we would be together again.

I walked back to him, back to our bedroom. It took me a lot of effort to place him on the bed, but I managed to place him right where he always liked to sleep. He looked so pale now, but he still looked so handsome. From his side I took my beautiful dress and decisively took some scissors that were on my vanity, without thinking twice I started to make some cuts before putting it on, then I looked at myself in the mirror, I hated myself, I hated being the person who had brought things to this point, and with tears in my eyes, scissors in hand, I started to cut my hair evenly.

I dropped the scissors, I had ruined everything, I had ruined our life, our marriage and I had ended his dream and all his effort had gone down the drain because of me. I walked over to the small bureau next to the bed and took from the only drawer his sleeping pills, Carlos always took two after a day full of adrenaline to be able to rest properly. I also took the forgotten bottle of anti-stress pills that had once been prescribed for me.

I looked at them for a moment before walking to the bar and grabbing a glass to pour a shot of whiskey. Drink with which I took the pills, I have no idea how many there were but I knew it might take a while for them to take effect. So I started to dress him.

In his tuxedo he looked so handsome, but now he was so cold. I sat next to him and admired his now expressionless face, it had been my fault, I had caused him this. In a moment I felt all the strength leave my body and I climbed a little on the bed, to lie down next to him. I positioned myself so that my face was on his chest and hugged him with my arms. I had a great desire to sleep, but I was still conscious of how I felt my demons being released.

In the distance the sound of police sirens could be heard, but it was too late. Still, before it was all over I had to say goodbye, I had to apologize to him, later we would be together again, somewhere after death.

—I am so sorry my love, I never wanted it to come to this. I wanted to spend my life with you, I wanted to be able to give you so many moments and memories, I wanted to give you the surprise that we would be parents, but if I don't have you by my side, I don't want to live a life without you. I know it's all my fault, but it doesn't matter anymore, we made a promise to each other, we promised to always be together—. The words began to come out of my mouth in a rush, my eyes were heavy and I knew that there was little time left but I still had some words to say.— I will make sure that it is so, I will make sure that we can keep that promise, I love you and I will always love you—. The words stopped coming out of my mouth and I concentrated on closing my eyes and sleeping, it was time for me to leave everything here.

The knocking on the door was so loud, the sound of the sirens was also louder, but it was impossible to open my eyes again.

—Police, open the door!—. The knocking was getting more and more continuous.— Police, open the door, I will not repeat it one more time—. More knocks on the door, louder and more determined. I knew they were going to break down the door, but nothing mattered, because even if they tried they could not save me, they could not save us.

Everything seemed to happen in slow motion, rapid footsteps coming up towards us and distorted voices.

—We need paramedics, someone call for an ambulance urgently—. Everything seemed to spin around, I tried to open my eyes, to see what was going on, I really tried but it was impossible.— We have a probable suicide attempt and a person with no vital signs, we need paramedics urgently... —. And everything became silence and thick blackness, finally I was free from the hell that my life was becoming.

      --- ---

—We have sad and regrettable news in the world of sports, last night the famous Formula 1 racer, who played a role in the Ferrari team, Carlos Sainz and his wife, better known as Mr. and Mrs. Sainz, were found in their apartment without vital signs. According to police reports, the autopsy of the driver indicates that he died from severe poisoning, while the autopsy of his young wife indicates that she died from an overdose of different pills, which makes them think that she committed suicide—. She looked at the camera after reading all the information she had in her hands —. A sad loss for the world of Formula 1, we extend our condolences to the family of both... That's all for today, have a very good night.