lillie98 - Lillie’s_World
Lillie’s_World

Weird Things Float Around in My Brain

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Watching Todays Youth Grow Up With Characters Like Charlie Spring, Nick Nelson, Mike Wheeler, Will Byers,

Watching today’s youth grow up with characters like Charlie Spring, Nick Nelson, Mike Wheeler, Will Byers, and so many others who are not only creating an entirely new class of fan culture, but setting the stage for long-overdue conversations gives me hope for the future.

They’re placing young men’s mental health center stage and reminding everyone that reaching out for help does not make you weak, it means you’re strong enough to pull yourself out of your darkest moments. I’m honored to live in the era of groundbreaking mainstream television and witness the life-saving conversations taking place around them. Everyone working on these shows (and countless others) are out here saving lives and giving people like me who grew up feeling like a mistake hope. Reminding us that it does get better, if you have the courage to reach out and grab the freedom for yourself.

(I’m ridiculously excited for Thursday, can you tell?)

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More Posts from Lillie98

5 months ago

he sleeps wearing johnnys jacket every night till it doesn’t smell like him anymore and wears his shoes till the soles are falling off btw

He Sleeps Wearing Johnnys Jacket Every Night Till It Doesnt Smell Like Him Anymore And Wears His Shoes
He Sleeps Wearing Johnnys Jacket Every Night Till It Doesnt Smell Like Him Anymore And Wears His Shoes
5 months ago
New Beginnings
New Beginnings
New Beginnings
New Beginnings

new beginnings

5 months ago

Will confirms he's been lost without Mike for the past months.

Mike confirms he's felt weird without Will being in Hawkins and like he lost him.

They both mutually were lost without one and other. They're endgame. There's no actual other way.

5 months ago

I’m all in my feels today. First Heartstopper 3 and then opening Instagram to find this on my stories. You and Phil are here for a purpose. You’re changing lives. Here’s to healing out loud. ❤️‍🩹

Infographic reading "Visible representation: which LGBTQ+ public figures do young LGBTQ+ Britons say helped them growing up? Daniel Howell is number two and Phil Lester is number four. Above the infographic, Daniel Howell wrote,"damn, becoming the people that I needed so much when I was younger makes me feel like everything I went through was for a reason." Below the infographic, Dan wrote, "thank you."

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5 months ago

Beauty in the Fold (SPOILERS)

I saw The Outsiders (Broadway version) over the weekend and I have so many thoughts. I've never read the book (I will) or seen the movie, but I completely fell in love with the story. I knew Johnny and Ponyboy had a special friendship, but watching Johnny die and seeing Ponyboy (who was an incredible understudy) absolutely shatter nearly broke me. He sat parked in front of their small tv, silent and motionless, save for turning the tv back on when Darry turned it off. I don't blame Darry for turning it off, he wanted Pony to break out of his catatonia, but Pony needed more than tough love. He needed something to ground himself. He needed to feel Johnny near him again. Receiving Johnny's vest from Cherry (which was a nice touch) gave him the physical closure he needed in an incredibly vulnerable moment. He buried his face in the material and breathed in Johnny's scent, realizing how much he missed it. You could see the weight lifting off his shoulders. I forget how much time the brothers say had passed before that moment, but my gut says two weeks. Ponyboy hasn't physically touched anything relating to Johnny for two whole weeks, and they most likely spent every day together. The book also hints that Johnny would spend nights with the Curtis brothers when his house became too volatile. These boys were brothers. Losing Johnny felt like losing a family member.

Stay Gold was obviously heartbreaking, but also beautifully staged. Johnny starting from across the stage and slowly making his way over as Ponyboy acknowledges him was a perfect demonstration of their relationship in this moment. Ponyboy tried to move on by himself, but he needed one more moment with Johnny. The letter gave him that moment. He needed to know Johnny didn't blame him for what happened at the fountain or the church---that his best friend would do everything the same way if given the option because brothers protect each other, even with their lives. Seeing the two boys slide onto the car in synch felt like Johnny was Pony's guardian angel, his shadow, guiding him through this moment. We see Johnny walk into the sunset (of his life) at the end of the song, but we also see Ponyboy rejoin his brothers at the table and eat dinner with them, symbolically beginning his healing journey. These are the stories we need right now. We need to see people, especially young people, endure tremendous heartbreak and overcome insurmountable odds and make it to the other side. We need to see that, given the right support system, anyone can heal.

I imagine Pony, after that day, wakes up extra early in the mornings and goes to the park to watch the sunrise. He writes letters, stories, and poems about his life. He also talks to Johnny. There's never anyone else around now that the Greasers rule the park, and they all understand Pony's ritual, so he speaks out loud to Johnny. He tells him about his life, their friends, and what all happens in Tulsa. Talking to Johnny heals him, makes him feel less gone. He talks to Dally too, but not as often. Their relationship is complicated. Ponyboy describes every sunrise, though he's sure Johnny sees every one. He continues this ritual into college and beyond, always making time for the boy who gave everything for him. It takes some bartering with the police, but Ponyboy also gets Johnny's knife, which he never cleans, afraid to wash away the memories embedded in it. The healing process is slow and arduous, but Ponyboy does eventually heal and create a life for himself, bringing his best friend along every step of the way.


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