Mentalheathawareness - Tumblr Posts
Mental Health Awareness Month
(TW) hello, everyone! its heather here <3 i just realized that this month is mental health awareness month, and i dont know if any of you know, but i take mental health very seriously. if you are going through some hard times right now, this post is for you. your life matters. you deserve love, and i know that it may seem hopeless now, but it is these hard times that help us grow. you can always talk to me through dms if you want. (TW) i have self-harmed before, but looking back, it did not help one bit. in fact, it has taken me several months to get over it. i also used to purge, (i try not to now) due to body shaming issues.,.. if you’re one of the people who struggles with positive body image, i know how you feel. i am very insecure, especially my thighs and arms... but in the end, we are all beautiful. our very wise BTS leader Kim Namjoon once said, “no one is born ugly; we just live in a judgemental world.” this is very true, and i believe that we are all beautiful in our own unique, special way. i wanted to say this to all of my followers, because i have friends who are also going through hard times, and that also includes me. i am still struggling, and honestly, we are always going to struggle. and if anybody tells you that “it’s in your head,” “you’re doing better than other people so you don’t need help,” etc. PLEASE. DO NOT LISTEN TO THEM. your struggle is as valid as those who are doing bad also. everyone matters. if you want to learn more about mental health, i recommend you listen to this interview: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tx6Zguzu264 this is very important, and i believe that mental health is just as important as physical health. thank you for taking the time to read this, and i love you all so much <3 stay safe, wear your mask, wash your hands, and be true to yourself <3
here's to the people who hate new years, who can't get into the spirit, who are alone, who don't care, who are abandoned, who for whatever reason feel isolated right now. it's gonna be okay.
I never actually use this account too much anymore. However I feel I need a safe public space for me to rant and talk about my issues anonymously. I’m coming to terms with the fact my long time friend is replacing me with someone who absolutely hates me. It’s been extremely painful. Especially since their friendship was so odd to begin with. my best friend would constantly tell me they were only friends with this person because they “felt bad for her”. Even their S/O had told me they didn’t really like them. But i’d see posts of them calling this person their soulmate or their best friend. This was so confusing and conflicting to me. especially since my friend told me this person was “forcing” them to post these types of things. They have even called this person a bitch before. However i’m getting fed up. i’m getting tired. i’m tired of being the person initiating every conversation. I’m tired of putting all this energy into someone who hasn’t showed me they genuinely cared in months. I’ve lately been in a situation where i’ve had to be around this person for a short period of time every day. This person who i feel they’re replacing me with hates me. They’ve talked shit about me, and tried to convince my best friend that I wasn’t a good person. There was so much drama that happened for so long. But i’m finally done. I’m tired. And i don’t think I deserve to feel this way. A best friend should make you feel loved. appreciated. someone who makes you laugh. someone you’re excited to be around. Not someone who you stay up late at night crying about. Not someone who gives you panic attacks because you feel you aren’t good enough, or that they might hate you. This is incredibly painful for me. and i’m not sure what to do anymore. I just need someone. i feel so so so alone.
Counseling is not about being a being a victim. It is about breaking the victim mindset.
Trigger warning : Mental illness
A short poem about OCD 2
Why is it spinning in my mind,
What else is it going to find?
Another bugging memory alive,
Stir up my worry to thrive.
My brain is too full and aching
Anxiety in my chest is spreading,
Can't have a clear look,
It's my life it's took.
And everything broke in ruins,
A drop red of body fluids,
Guilt pressing tight,
Another sleepless night,
A failure at all costs,
Cruel disease my mind hosts.
~poem written by myself (Sheo)
You know those moments when you're left alone with your thoughts and you let them wander, and then suddenly you feel this tug in your mind? Like you know if you let your thoughts go any further now, you'll fall into a deep spiral that you don't quite know how to come out of? You quickly think of something else or, get up and start walking or do just about anything to just get away from it
It comes out of nowhere and leaves you so scared
How do you stop having these moments..
yes, it’s nearly winter.
that means it’s nearly time to miss you.
grief will never be linear. even after years, and years, and years.
not that anything was ever meant to be. but no one can help but grieve the possibility. that no one is me.
and when i struggle, or question directions, i will always wonder what could’ve been.
the song pours out, challenged by the routes.
then there is the comfort, yet i cry, knowing i will meet you on the other side.
keep me on that path. even if it isn’t linear. keep me on the path to you, through the cold and dark winter.
When I finally understood
I never really understood why I was different. I just knew I was different. I was a head of most kids by learning how to walk and talk at an early age (before I was a year old). I accepted and understood everything fully at I wanna say 13 or 14 years old.
This is so true. No one ever knows how I'm feeling fully.
“You don’t see me crying at night, you don’t know what I’m feeling inside. It’s amazing what a smile can hide.”
— Unknown
I'm not sure how much longer I am going to stick around if I'm no longer enough and can't give a single person what they want. I think I'm just going to say goodbye and see where life takes me or where my depression takes me. One or the other.
Sorry if I'm not good enough. Sorry if I can't give you what you want. Sorry for everything
Why try to make friends when in the end they stab you in the back? Like for real? I put forth the effort and try to make time to hang out then you turn around and never show up. You lie to me about the stupidest things and end up not a decent human being, you string me along. Not happening anymore, you've been blocked. I don't like being toyed with. If I'm not important enough for you to want to hang out with me then go toy with someone else.
I was harrassed for shit I did when I was 8 to the current time having me be 12 at the time. Having dumb actions haunt me till I die, and being encouraged to kill myself.
This explains why I have no friends in high school cause the people there scare me, and I’m insecure if I’m even being good to someone.
I don’t fucking know, I don’t have good social skills cause that was a lot of my social life growing up. Living as a punching bag.
I think one of the things I hate most about college is how little time I find myself having to do basic upkeep. Like yeah I showered and did that kind of stuff, but I would also go days without eating an actual meal or getting more than 3 hours of sleep every night because I was so focused on doing school work and making sure I did not fall behind.
I always say “morning” instead of “good morning” because if it was a good morning I would have bled out last night
I see many people claim to be hypersexual and constantly say it as if it’s a funny, quirky side of them. Being hypersexual is a nightmare and I can’t stress that enough, it’s not someone just being horny all the time it far more than that. People need to research these things rather than instantly going along with it. As someone who’s hypersexual it’s something I’ve always kept hidden it always made me feel like I was disgusting so I activately avoid the topic but I feel the need to make others aware of it aswell. what the true meaning of hypersexualilty is and how it effects a person.
Not all man but most women. NOT ALL MEN BUT MOST WOMEN! I have never met a women who has never at least had one story to tell about how they been sexualized, sexually assaulted, sexually harassed or raped. Not all men but most women.
I just wanted to say thank you for the well spoken words on the Caiti situation, as a victim myself in almost the exact same way minus the alcohol, the rhetoric going around on this situation is so incredibly harmful.
There are so many obvious logical fallacies that will now just be used on other victims after this in the impact zone of the internet involved.
People saying that if it was actually bad, then someone in the room would have put a stop to it, when bystander effect, normalized bad practices, and alcohol exists.
People saying that since George didn’t do it purposefully without consent means it isn’t SA.
People saying that if it was serious she would have gotten the justice system involved when most cases aren’t going to be prosecutable in a court of law with minimal proof, and in general often damage the victims more without an outcome that helps anyone, and is often morally objectionable due to the inhumane aspects of prison and US punishment without good rehabilitation.
People saying that she’s either too much or too little traumatized for the experience to be valid, when the incident being morally wrong doesn’t require more or less of an impact.
People saying that people supporting Caiti are saying it’s exactly the same as Shelby’s situation and because it’s not, it’s less valid, when although abuse and SA can have different scales of harm caused, doesn’t mean that SA doesn’t deserve condemnation. Weaponizing someone’s lengthy painful experience to say that we shouldn’t treat another’s seriously is awful. Her story is exactly what Shelby meant to inspire sharing, because this stuff happens in all shapes and forms.
People saying that being emotional or not describing every part in excruciating detail when coming forward for the first time is manipulative and proves bad character or smth.
People saying that because a perpetrator is drunk both sides were equally as wrong and no one can be held accountable.
People saying that cuddling, flirting, being friendly before or after, freezing, not immediately leaving, not saying no, is consent.
People saying that this must be for clout or money because subs are turned on.
People saying that George’s response was a good apology when he said that because the act wasn’t extreme for him he didn’t think much of it, and focusing on many details not actually related to the incident or on other general hatred for dteam to imply bias against them, and generally implied that he was sorry that she felt uncomfortable rather than for what he did. And accepting the apology for Caiti.
People saying that to come forward (especially while not even naming the person) was only to ruin their life, and that that’s the only thing you can get out of coming forward publicly instead of support, peace of mind from not keeping something inside so long, and awareness so other people could come forward etc.
People saying that it was wrong to not handle this privately when that isn’t a viable option for a lot of cases particularly with powerful people involved, or when what you are seeking isn’t necessarily anything from who hurt you, like this is just some petty drama.
People saying that only acts considered more “extreme” and even more sexual should be taken seriously.
People saying because she angrily laughed in her recent response and was extremely explicit about what happened to her that she couldn’t have been shy or hesitant in her first response and is lying.
People actively victim blaming and overemphasizing underage drinking because “she isn’t a victim” when this exact rhetoric will and has been used in these cases time and again and shouldn’t be brought up when SA is even in the discussion, and will be used to guilt people who see it when they become a victim.
People saying perceived consent for other acts or the same act previously is consent for another.
People now believing in an incredibly dangerous definition of nonverbal consent because of dream’s statement, when nonverbal consent has been promoted for the protection of people who go nonverbal, it has to be as clear and exact as verbal consent, either as predetermined signals with a partner, nods, or moving someone’s hand somewhere, not just interpreting body language of a drunk stranger. The whole point of the consent movement is to have signs that aren’t misinterpretable to avoid hurting your partner or someone. If someone internally does not consent, but these signs prove consent, then what is the point? If I thought the signs I was using with someone I loved or a human I respect as I living being, didn’t actually express their wishes, I’d sure as hell try something else.
People saying that because Caiti expressed these signs that they’re calling nonverbal consent that she was lying to George.
People saying that because of that, this is a false allegation and is damaging victims, and some victims weaponizing their own experience to say that Caiti isn’t a victim and should shut up.
People saying that she just changed her mind, and anyone who isn’t reacting absolutely negatively in the moment who hasn’t consented is just having self guilt and is projecting.
People saying that anything other than enthusiastic consent is consent.
More real actual victims are going to fall into one of these categories of criticism and false logic, with it being much rarer that a ‘perfect’ victim comes along by these standards, and an intricate framework for ignoring them has been developed from this incident. If dteam hadn’t promoted and encouraged all of these fallacies from the start I think Caiti could have gotten a proper response to help her move on and not be so much more damaged, and many people wouldn’t have started to see dteam as so tainted by ugliness. In that way everything they’ve done since Caiti first came forward has done perhaps more long term damage than the act itself.
Because of their bias and falling for these manipulative tactics, this audience would just as easily invalidate me, and that hurts, even as I didn’t get as hurt as Caiti and I actually got validation from the people I told and had the confidence to know it was wrong immediately even though I froze and such, all these years later, this fact somehow hurts.
Sorry for the rant, I just needed this off my chest. Thanks again.
Ofcourse it means the world to mean hearing other peoples story’s and your rant is incredibly well worded. I show my support for victims because I know how hard it is. I was always silent for the longest time but now all I can feel is anger and I want people to understand that is more complex than it actually is and you can’t always go to the authorities. When I was 9 I had my 2nd experience this one being me realizing what sexual harassment actually is. I did go to court and I talked to authorities but in the end “I was lying.” I was 9 and they expected me to give full detail on what had happened when in reality all I wanted was to play with my Barbie’s. I didn’t understand what was actually happening cause I was a child. The justice system is incredibly flawed. Sad part is I still see him when holidays come around. It’s sickening. People constantly jumping to blame the victim makes me irritated. To them no matter what you’ll do you’re never gonna be considered a real victim. The idea of how our society reacts to these topics deeply upsets me. I speak for victims who are always told be silent cause they deserve to be heard. Saying she just wants clout is ridiculous when she has so much more to lose than George does. This why most of my post are on these serious topics because I’m not allowing myself to ever be silenced again. I’m also so sorry that you had to experience something similar, I wish every victim the best healing journey. It’s important to remember you’re not alone and there’s people here who believe you and think your story is valid. No matter how big or small your story is, no matter how big or small the impact it had on you is, your story will forever be valid.