Stan X Reader Headcanons Protective/wants You Safe (SFW)

Stan x Reader Headcanons protective/wants you safe (SFW)

(tw: mentions weapons)

installed a security latch on the door at your place and put wooden dowels in the window tracks

insisted on teaching you how to shoot a rifle and throw a solid punch

checks your car's fluids regularly so you won't break down (even though you told him that you check them yourself)

Had Ford build you a little tazer to carry on walks/hikes (Dipper asked when he's getting his)

gave you his old brass knuckles from when his hands were smaller ("You don't have to use 'em, just flash 'em if someone bothers you")

taught you how to hide objects in your clothes close your body so that they don't show at all (works great for sneaking snacks into the movies)

taught you all the things you legally do/don't have to say if you get pulled over

Stan and Dipper Headcanons

(tw: fifth one mentions firearms)

When Mabel isn't with them, Stan lets Dipper ride in the front seat. He once even let Dipper drive the car around the shack's property and they both promised not to tell Mabel

Since that day, Stan will sometimes let go of the wheel and yell at Dipper to take over. Dipper knows he's bluffing but it still makes him anxious. Stan finds it hilarious

Stan taught Dipper to play poker and blackjack. They stay up late and play together when Mabel has sleepovers, and sometimes Soos will join them

Stan is constantly buying Dipper new shoes after they get ruined in adventures. Stan also offered to give him a replacement hat from the giftshop, but Dipper said he likes the character his old one has

After Stan's memory was erased, Dipper figured out the combination to his gun safe and changed it, for Stan's own safety. He gave Stan the new combo after he was sure he was back to his old self. Stan thanked Dipper but immediatly changed the combination again

At the end of the summer, Stan gave Dipper his lucky set of 8-ball cuff links for his first high school dance.

Ford and Dipper edition

Stan and Mabel edition

Stan x Reader Headcanons (SFW/Fluff)

I'm a little baby tumblr user and Gravity Falls fan and this is my first post :) I hope you like them

Loves when you cook for him. Has had very few good home cooked meals in his life and considers it a delicacy. Won’t ask you to cook but thanks you every time and tries his best to help when he can. 

Dances with you a lot in the kitchen or on the porch and loves to spin/dip you. He will also give Mabel a turn if she asks.

The type to flick you with the towel or splash water on you while doing the dishes and loves when you do it back. Similarly, you two once got in a water fight with the hose while washing his car. 

Asks for back/head scratches all the time - it’s the only time his body is fully relaxed. His burn scar gets especially itchy.

Will take you up on the roof to stargaze after the kids are asleep. Knows how to find all the constellations - learned star navigation for fun as a kid and used it to pass the time while living in his car. (Finally got to put it to use while sailing with Ford). His favorite constellation is Gemini.

Admitted that he never liked reading (dyslexia) but lets you read aloud to him before bed and gets really invested in the story. 

Can’t sing to save his life but when a romantic song comes on he’ll use a nearby object as a mic and dramatically serenade you.

Says “I love you” as much as he can (to you and the kids, and sometimes even Ford) because for so long he didn’t have anyone to say it to.

Stan and Mabel Headcanons

Mabel noticed Stan doesnt wear a seatbelt very much when he drives, so she took the "our hero" sash and turned it into a seatbelt cover for him and told him "if you want to be our hero again you have to wear a seatbelt"

Mabel saw him sewing a button back on his shirt and insisted she teach him cross-stitch. They cross-stitch together and watch ducktective. She finds patterns for him with stuff like "this isn't a crack house, it's a crack home"

Stan lets Mabel paint his nails and draw "tattoos" on him. She once wrote "I love you" on him, and he saved a picture of it so he could get it actually tattooed in her handwriting someday

For a while, Mabel decided she needed to become vegetarian for Waddles, and Stan learned to cook vegetarian meals for her

Mabel knows she's not allowed in Stan's room but still likes to slide drawings and notes under the door, especially if she thinks he's in there because he's upset

Stan dictates the shopping list to Mabel. He checks the fridge and cabinets and she writes. She always adds "candy" at the end, covers it in stickers, and writes notes like "don't shoplift!"

Mabel and Ford edition

Stan and Dipper edition

The way Stanley??? Always looks out for his family??? Even when they've been mean to him???? Is honestly really admirable????

Like not everyone would look out for their sibling after they've cut them out of their life. Not everyone would try to be better for their niece and nephew because they wanted to leave originally. Not everyone would take a lonely boy under their wing and become essentially their parental figure. Not everyone would still try to make amends when their sibling is hellbent on holding onto a grudge nor willing to sacrifice themselves to protect their loved ones.

Stanley Pines is like the most selfless dude when it really comes down to it. He's a good man despite his fuck ups and it makes me adore him as both a character and a person. Wish we had more people like Stan out there in the world.

(tw: war)

Its been on my mind lately that if Stanley left home in the late 60's or early 70's he would have been eligible for the vietnam draft. And that maybe the first time he commited identify fraud was to evade the draft. One of his prison sentences may have even been due to this. The sentence for draft evasion was 5 years, and while we know his time imprisoned in Columbia was due to a heist, we're left in the dark about his other sentences.

Maybe at first, Stanley had intentions of getting his family the money honestly, but the draft threw a wrench into the whole thing and it spiraled him into a life of crime until the postcard came.

Meanwhile, Stanford was exempt because he was enrolled as a college student. University enrollment allowed deferment from the draft until schooling was complete. And if Ford was enrolled in PHD programs until after 1974, he would've never had to report.

I wonder, did Stanford ever watch the news, the riots, and think about his brother potentially being sent to die in a foreign country? Did he care?

Did Stan ever feel like a coward for not going to war? Did he wonder if his family would have thought of him as a hero - if more people would have attended his funeral - if he had died in vietnam instead?