Dreams; Kyan Reki

dreams; kyan reki

synposis: in which you tend to reki’s wounds after his second beef with adam; second part to this fic but it can be read on it’s own! takes place after episode 11

pairings: gn! reader x reki

genre: fluff. just fluff. and caretaking.

warnings: mentions of injuries. swearing. brief nudity (?) sap, so sappy.

word count: 3.5k

notes: i loved the series so much! reki has suffered enough, so i decided to show his some love. i was so so proud of him during episode 11. again, i apologize in advance for grammatical/spelling errors. i'm pretty busy with school so i'm just churning fics out at this point.

“i’m not letting you lift a finger for a month” you moan as you help seat reki on his bed. you’re both mostly dried from the rain, save for your hair and clothes. he only giggles in response and you can’t help it when you lean down to gingerly place your hands up to his face, kissing the bridge of his nose. “a month”

“ahh, i don’t think that’s gonna work” reki gives you an easy grin, before placing a kiss on the side of you mouth. “i got a shift tomorrow”

“i’ll cover your shift” you say, stone-faced. disbelief momentarily flashes across reki’s face before he breaks out into uncontrollable giggles—the kind that erupts straight from your stomach. your hands drop from his face. “shh! i’m serious!”

he hangs his head forward and brings a hand up to his mouth, attempting to quell his giggles. “you don’t even work there, y/n!” he manages to say before delving into yet another fit of giggles. reki must’ve curled in too far because his laughter is cut off by strangled cry. immediately, you surge forward, gingerly placing your hands on his shoulders.

it wasn’t unusual for reki to be banged up from skateboarding—everything from scrapes to fractures were all pretty common for him. in the beginning of your relationship with reki, it worried you to no end, and you even begged him to wear a helmet (he said no, of course). eventually you came to accept that injuries were going to be a normal occurrence for reki. but his injuries this time were slightly different.

reki had his second beef with adam earlier that night. technically reki had lost, but it felt more like a victory instead. he came so close, and he did so well. and he was happy. seeing him like that in his element, gleaming with joy, eyes lit a flame with passion—you felt like ten years was added to your lifespan. of course, reki took quite the beating but no where near the damage of last time.

“m’fine!” he wheezes, placing a hand over his stomach. “it’s just a bruise.”

you’re not convinced and it shows on your face because reki gently places his hand on the back of your head, pulling your forehead up against his. “i’m fine, baby”

you let yourself stay there, forehead pressed against reki’s and staring right into each other’s eyes. for the first time in weeks, you felt the tightness in your chest completely dissipate. because here you were gazing into his eyes—reki’s eyes, in his darkened room, knowing he was safe and okay.

“okay,” you whisper. reki gazes at you with half-lidded eyes and attempts to press his forehead closer (if that was even possible), brushing his nose against yours. “but i gotta patch you up”.

you wiggle out of reki’s grasp, who whimpers at the loss of contact, to grab the first aid kit he’d kept in his drawer. stumbling in the dark, you feel around for his desk, flicking on the lamp. reki watches you sift through the contents of his drawer, overtaken by a sudden wave of fondness. he loves you, always has. but suddenly, in this moment, he feels the love he has for you in a new way. it pools in his stomach, warm and fuzzy, and he feels so full, so content, like he ate a whole meal.

“i love you from my stomach” reki blurts out before he’s aware of what he’s saying. from over your shoulder, you glance at him quizzically and he feels a new sensation—mortification, burn all over his face. later, he’s going to blame his misspeaking on the fact that it was so late into the night and that every inch of his body was practically throbbing in pain. but right now, he can’t form any thoughts, let alone excuses.

“huh?” you’re facing him now, first aid kit in hand and your face twitching with the urge to smile. feeling his ears burn up, reki presses his lips and shakes his head, refusing to repeat what he said. “reki~! what did you say?”

he turns his head to the side as you make your way over to the bed. “i forgot”

“no you didn’t!” you whine, throwing the first aid kit on the bed and placing your hands over his cheeks. “say it again, please?”

“ahh, i meant it like—”reki pauses, thinking about how to put his feelings into words. “i-i don’t know! i love you, but sometimes i feel it in my stomach”

“oh”, you plop down right next to him on the bed, pulling your legs up to sit crisscross. reki follows your movement, pulling his legs up on the bed and crossing them. he’s looking at expectantly. “like butterflies, yeah?”

“no, not that. this feels warm—and kinda heavy”

“oh”, you tilt your head to one side and smile coyly. “so, desire then?”

reki rolls his eyes at you, his ears still red. “you’re so—”

“desperately in love with you?” you offer with a grin before leaning and catching his lips in a noisy kiss. you pull back, but not before kissing the tip of his nose just to see his reaction. reki fights back a smile, the corners of his mouth twitching upwards as he shakes his head.

“j-just patch me up, please”, he sighs as his lips finally quirk into a smile.

“can I change first?” you ask. wet jeans felt like murder and your shirt was starting to stick in uncomfortable places on your torso. reki nods and points to his closet.

“i have clean shirts and sweatpants folded in there” he informs you, watching as you sit up and make your way over to his closet. reki’s not surprised when you grab his pink dope sketch shirt, shooting him a cheeky grin.

you start tugging off your jeans and reki looks away to give your privacy. “you’re so precious, reki” you coo at him. reki only smiles at the opposite wall and shakes his head. when you’re done, you drop your wet clothes in his laundry and walk over to him. “i’m decent!”

reki looks back at you and his heart twists at the sight of you, clad in his work shirt, hanging just above your knees and slightly hugging your waist. he prays he isn’t blushing and gulps.

“i have sweatpants if you want some, sweetheart”, he reminds you weakly, trying to stop staring.

you blink at him, lost and then you gasp. “oh, sorry! I didn’t meant to make you uncomfortable!” you rush. “i’ll put some pants on—”

“no!” he practically shouts, before squeezing his lips shut. you both hold your breaths when you hear his little sister in the next room, groan and shift in her sleep. waiting, until he’s sure it’s safe, he continues much quietly. “i’m not uncomfortable. you look really good, i love you like this. i just want you to feel comfortable”

adoration surges in your chest as you watch your boyfriend clumsily and earnestly explain himself, a blush adorned on his face. “i feel the most comfortable when i’m with you” you admit with a shy smile, your face growing warm.

reki blinks up at you for a second, looking momentarily stunned before his face morphs into a soft grin. his eyes twinkle as he holds his hands out for you, sure and steady. placing your hands in his calloused ones, you sit down beside on the bed and sit criss crossed.

the both of you sit like that for a while, staring lovingly at one another and taking turn squeezing each other’s hands. finally, you bring reki’s hands up to your lips, littering his knuckles with kisses before giving them a quick squeeze.

“where do you hurt the most?” you question, sliding your hands out of his to open the first aid kit. you skim over his injuries, not even knowing where to start. there’s a line of dried blood and a bruise forming on the right side of his face, must be a small laceration under his headband. you know his back is cut up pretty badly and you hope it’s nothing too deep.

“my whole body is sore, if i’m going to be honest” he replies sheepishly. frowning, you gently tug off his headband to assess the damage. just as you suspected, a small cut right under his hairline. the area is beginning to bruise too. you remember adam repeatedly punching him at one point, as reki had locked his arms around him... maybe reki should go to a hospital?

“I promise you i’m fine”, reki assures you, having picked up on the mounting worry on your face. he takes your hand in his, rubbing the roughened pad of his thumb over the back of your hand. “trust me! i’ve had worse. i was jumped and hit with a car all in one day and i didn’t even get a concussion”.

despite reki’s face beaming with pride, you frown deeper and fidget at the thought of reki getting hurt like that. “please don’t remind me...” you sigh, sitting up off the bed to grab a face towel from his closet. “i’m gonna run this under water, okay?”

“alright”, reki answered, watching you step out of his room to make your way to the bathroom. you hurry back, the wet towel dripping water down your forearm, and gently seat yourself on the bed.

you arrange yourself so that you are sitting criss cross in front of reki. “I’m going to clean it, alright?” you say, before leaning into give him a peck.

“okay” he murmurs, placing his hand on your knee. reki squeezes hard when you gently press the wet towel against his wound. you do this repeatedly until you make sure there’s no visible dirt around the wound before placing the towel on reki’s bedside table. you’re quick to patch up his forehead before placing a gentle kiss over the bandage. he snickers through his nose at this, squeezing your knee once more.

“now for your back...” you purse your lips. “take your shirt off.”

you’ve seen reki shirtless a thousand times before and he knows this. still, he can’t help but squirm under your gaze as he works at removing the layers of clothing he’s wearing. he takes his jacket off fine but he struggles a bit with his hoodie, still damp from the rain, wincing as he tugs upward on the fabric.

“here, lemme help you”, you murmur, sitting forward on your knees to tug his hoodie upwards and over his head. you work at the white t-shirt he had on under his hoodie next. gently as you could, you peeled the shirt off reki’s torso trying not to disturb his wounds. but he still flinches, sucking a quick breath in. “sorry! i’m sorry!”

“no, no! you’re fine, it just stung a little” reki promises you, giving your thigh a squeeze. you tug the t-shirt over his head, grimacing. his torso is littered with bruises and a few scrapes, but nothing too worrisome.

“okay, lemme see your back”, you tell him, bracing yourself as you crawl around him get a full glimpse. just as you thought, his back is scraped up and still bleeding lightly—nothing too deep. you grab the wet towel on his bedside table and hop off the bed to go run it under the bathroom facet.

when you return, reki is sitting on his bed exactly like you left, watching you tip toe over to him. “do you wanna take off your pants?” you ask, folding the wet towel. “maybe change into something dry?”

“um, yeah actually...” reki mutters, fumbling with his belt. “c-could you grab me some sweatpants? please?”

with the wet towel in one hand, you grab a pair of gray sweatpants from reki’s closet with your other hand. you can hear reki shuffling out of his pants as you walk over to the bed, with your face turned away.

you hold the sweatpants out for him, your face turned to the side. “you don’t have to look away if you don’t want to”, reki tells you and you can hear the smile in his voice. he takes the sweatpants from your hands.

“you gave me privacy, so i’m returning to the favor—give me your wet clothes, i’ll put them in the hamper”

you trade off the wet towel for reki’s clothes, wheeling around to place them in his hamper. when you turn back, reki is sitting with his legs hanging over the edge of the bed, wearing just his sweatpants and holding the wet towel in one hand.

“whenever you’re ready, nurse y/n”, he smiles at you, showing his teeth. you squint your eyes at him playfully and shuffle over to his bed. accepting the wet towel from reki, you crawl behind him so that you have full access to his back.

“okay, i’m going to clean your wounds, let me know if i’m hurting you”, you warn him, folding your legs underneath you. he grunts in response. taking a breath to steel yourself, you gently press the towel against the abrasions. suddenly, reki gasps loudly. you squeak and pull back almost immediately, your heart in your throat. “what?”

reki’s back is shaking and to your relief (and horror), you realize reki is laughing. he turns his head around to catch a glimpse at your expression and laughs so hard, he snorts and it almost makes you laugh—almost.

“i’m sorry, i couldn’t help it”, he gasps between laughs.

you suck your teeth. “well, now that it’s out of your system, can you hold still? i seriously don’t want to hurt you” you reposition yourself, heart still hammering in your chest.

“sorry, angel, go ahead”, he stifles a giggle, holding still. hesitantly, you press the wet towel to abrasions on his back.

“that okay?” you question and he nods. taking another breath, you dab his entire span of his back with the towel, stopping every now and then to check in on him. once you’ve cleaned his wounds up, you dig around in the first aid kit for some gauze sponges to pat his back dry. “i’m gonna wrap you up for tonight but you should let it dry tomorrow, okay?”

“you got it, nurse” reki chimes back and you bite back a smile, reaching for the gauze dressing in the first aid kit. once you’ve placed the dressing over the worst of his wounds, you grab the gauze roll and begin to wrap it around reki’s torso.

at one point, your fingers brush up against his side and his breath slightly hitches. you freeze, giving him a concerned hum.

“i’m ticklish” he whispers sheepishly and you smirk, continuing to wrap the gauze around his torso.

“storing this information for later, thank you!” you tease causing reki groans. “i didn’t wrap it too tight, did i? can you breathe?”

“i can breathe fine, don’t worry” reki sighs, as you loosely tie the gauze. “you did great, thank you”

once you’re done tying the gauze, you place your hands on top of reki’s shoulders. “good?” you ask.

“good”, reki nods. you take in reki’s bandaged back, his slightly toned shoulders, his red hair pressed against nape of his neck, even the back of his head. he look’s so good with his hair down.

before you even know what you’re doing, you gently press your lips against the nape of his neck. reki freezes, his shoulder tensing before you press another kiss along the back of his neck. he shivers and his whole body melts. you kiss again, this time further up the nape of his neck and into his hair and he lets his head hang forward, sighing slightly. another kiss is placed where his neck meets his shoulder, and he has to bite back a whimper.

“i’m so proud of you”, you whisper into the back of his neck. he reaches around to squeeze your hand. “you did so great tonight—you’re always so great, you never fail to amaze me.”

upon hearing your words, reki feels a lump form in his throat. you always told him that, how proud you were of him for doing things he thought were exceedingly mundane. he remembers that night he was panicking in your bathroom, shaking on his legs like a newborn deer and barely managing to control his breathing. how even then, you were proud of him, for what exactly? he couldn’t answer.

but now, when you tell him that with your lips soft against his nape, in the darkness of his room, he believes you. he’s banged up and unbelievably sore, but he believes you. and further more, he’s feeling proud of himself too, for not disappointing himself, for doing what he had come to do at that beef.

reki shifts around, so that he’s facing you to see that you're smiling at him in a way that he could only describe as pure adoration.

“and...” you start, pushing his bangs back from his forehead. “you looked so fucking hot”.

reki eyes widened slightly before he blows air out of his mouth and rolls his eyes. you grab his face, forcing him to look at you.

“no, no! but you actually looked really good?” you giggled, squeezing his cheeks between your hands. “like, when you nailed that landing off that cliff? and when you dodged him like that? like, i knew you could move, but you were really moving, you know—?”

“y/n—”reki starts, grinning pretty hard as he tries to advert his gaze from yours.

“and you were smiling so hard, like you were actually glowing—beaming! i don’t know, something about the way you looked under those lights they have at S...i actually wanted to bark, like wow—”

“y/n, shut up!” reki is giggling now, flushed right down to his chest. he tries to wrestle your hands from off his face, but you kept your grip.

“don’t act all shy now, mister! you knew exactly what you were doing! when you were like ‘and you’d better remember it’, i was this close to dropping to my knees—”

“y/n—”

“and every one was screaming your name and i was just like ‘yea, that’s my boyfriend! my man! my prince—!’”

suddenly, reki flips you over pinning you arms right beside your head, the both of you giggling.

“oh my god, why are you still going” reki half groans between giggles as you continue to cackle.

“my sweetheart, my baby, my sweat pea, my darling, the future of father of my children, my honey bunch, my sugar pie, the apple of my eye, the light of my life—” you list off, delirious with laughter, not even fighting against reki’s grip on your forearms. he hovers over you, laughing too, his eyes shining and his face beaming

“you need to stop” reki shakes his head slightly, his bangs falling onto your forehead as he leans in for a kiss. he pulls back and you're silent for a moment...until you start rattling off corny pet names again, but this time less giggly.

“my sun, my moon, my stars, my whole world—” you murmur before reki presses his lips against yours. he pulls away and kisses the tip of your nose, the skin slightly under your right eye, and onto your left eyelid.

“you’re so annoying”, reki whispers, letting go of your forearms to hold your face instead.

“you kinda are too”, you whisper back, placing your hands over his, rubbing your thumbs along the back of his hand.

“mmm, i guess we’re destined for one another then” he murmurs and you nod, fervently. reki kisses you sweetly and you hum against his lips. “i love you so much”.

“i love you too, baby” you sigh, putty in reki’s hands. he looks so pretty above you, the lamplight reflecting his eyes and his cheeks still flushed. he looks like the human embodiment of honey.

you turn your head over to glimpse at the alarm clock on his bed side table. 3:37 AM

“our sleeping schedules are so messed up” you groan turning your head back to look up at reki. he blinks, following your gaze towards the alarm clock.

“oh, i usually sleep around his time anyway” he shrugs.

“okay, but you have injuries...so you need to rest to heal” you reason while sitting up slightly, forcing reki to sit up with you. “are you still in pain? i can get you a tylenol”

“i’ll need one in the morning, but i’m fine for now”, he assures you with a grin.

you both climb under his blankets, but he wants for you to sit back against his pillows. already knowing, you hold your arms out for him and he lays between your legs, wrapping his arms around your torso. reki presses his ear to chest, taking in the steady rhythm of your heartbeat, as you smooth his hair back.

“goodnight, sweetheart” you whisper, leaving your hand in his hair.

“goodnight, baby” he murmurs into you chest, pressing a kiss there. “i love you, i can’t wait to wake up and see you tomorrow”

you chuckle tiredly. “i love you too, i’ll see you in the morning”.

notes: this was also, long as hell. i apologize! this is honestly the sappiest sh*t i’ve ever written, idk if it can get any sappier than this (it probably can, and will >:3) .

HOLD MY BOOKS ANYTIME

Let me Hold Your Books

who - takashi morinozuka x reader

word count - 2.4k

summary - takashi realizing his feelings for you 

an - thought this was a cute idea, possibly make this a series or at least a part two ?? i wanna write more for ohshc, so lmk what you think!

Keep reading

Accidentally Gushing Over Them

SMAU

AOT x gn!reader

warning(s): none besides lots of swearinggg

a/n: teehee silly little idea I had!! Love you guys :3

——————

taglist: @d1lfluvr @plutowrites @carmillous @pretty-pop-princess-hs @mossygreys (if you’d like to be added jus lemme know!)

UNDERRATED THIS WAS SO GOOD OMFG lowkey made me mad tho bc i want what they have LMAOOO /lh

Kissed by Moonlight: Jean Kirschtein x Reader

My first AoT fic for the love of my life <3 Will there be more? Likely--but almost exclusively of him!

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Jean Kirschtein x female Reader

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Modern AU, Jean and Reader live in a cliff beachside town, childhood best friends to lovers, fluff, pining, confession, first kiss

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Reader and Jean are early college, aged roughly 18-20

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It’s 3 a.m. and you’re nowhere close to sleeping when your best friend texts you.

Are you awake?

Your eyes focus on his name headlining the top of your screen. You supposed you should have his contact saved under a nickname, or with emojis, or something indicative of your friendship. But not even his last name appears; it’s just Jean, in standard silver letters, but some part of that makes it more romantic, you think, a wonderful familiarity lost in the simplicity. No need to put on airs with him, no need to pretend your relationship is supposed to be quirky or perfect. Pretentious never suited him.

Of course I am, you type back. Your fingers felt like they might bleed with the weight. I always am when I think of you.

But you back off; you delete the words before your foolish, lovesick heart can get too carried away. If he saw your typing bubble, he doesn’t indicate; his own bubble pops up, sending a caring message within a few seconds.

Because if you’re not, don’t worry about it. Go back to sleep.

A string tugs around your heart and pulls it into your stomach.

I’m awake.

As soon as you hit send he calls you, his handsome face lighting up the pitch black of your phone screen. He wasn’t even aware of this picture of him, you’re pretty sure. His eyes are closed and his head is thrown back, smiling, laughing at a joke Connie made; his face is colored by the orange and pink and yellow of a dying sun, too lost in his own world to realize the beauty that he brought to yours.

While others had embarrassing pictures of their friends sleeping or in ridiculous filters as their contact photos, you weren’t ashamed of this one. He was a serious boy, always under so much stress; he second-guessed himself when he didn’t need to, brilliant brain trapped under so many questions and doubts. It was nice to have a reminder of him smiling, his heart unbound and carefree, if only for you to enjoy.

You admired it a moment more before swiping to accept the call, nestling the phone against your ear. “Hey, J.”

Despite your insomnia, your voice was still rusty. He noticed instantly, clucking his tongue to take on that mother hen tone he so often directed at Connie and Sasha whenever they were doing something dumb. “You said you were awake.”

“I am!”

“Don’t sound like it.”

You sighed, rolling onto your side to nuzzle deeper into your pillow. Sometimes, if you strained really hard, you could make it smell like him. “Well, then I don’t know how else to convince you I am.”

He hummed, dropping the tone. “Sorry. I just worry about you.” The string tightened. “Bad night?”

Not now. Not since I’m talking to you. “No, just...there’s a lot on my mind.” It wasn’t a lie. There always was when it came to him.

“I’m with you on that.” He yawned, and even through the speaker you heard the adorable miniscule moans playing from his throat. “I think I can help.”

“Why are you lecturing me when you’re also awake?” you teased, cut off by his curt laugh.

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll be there in 5.” Just as you nearly hung up, he hastily tagged on, “And give me back my Scouts sweatshirt. You’ve had it for long enough.”

“No promises.”

“Do--”

An elephant never forgets, you thought as you hung up, slamming the phone back down onto your blankets. Running your hands down your face, through your hair, trying to make it look presentable, only to be left needy and frustrated instead. It wasn’t the first time you had stayed up late together, messy with wet hair and soft skin. The friend group had a habit of staying up late with sleepovers and videochatting--and even you and Jean, alone, when Connie and Sasha had passed out after their soda hauls. Like the total Dad friend he was, he made sure everyone else was out before he fell asleep--even lulling your insomniac self into the great beyond with a hand in your hair and gentle words. Sometimes you wondered if even that were a dream, cruel memories implanted by your brain due to intricate fantasies you wove for comfort, but even if they were, they helped calm your heart and rest your mind.

Pulling the covers back was a cruel awakening; the night air was chilling against your skin, goosebumps rising over the ridges of your legs. With a sigh you pulled on some leggings and your shoes, rifling through your closet for his coveted lacrosse sweatshirt. There was good reason as to why it was his favorite, and why you stole it so often. It was thick and cushiony, nearly waterproof, with the wings emblem printed on the front and his last name stitched across the back of the shoulders, warm and cuddly.

For some reason, having Kirschtein embroidered across your back filled you with a sense of security and warmed you to the furthest corners of your heart.

Lights flashed outside your window, and careful to keep your housemates sleeping you opened the screen and snuck out, shimmying down the pipe drain and landing on your feet outside the house. You dashed over to his car and he’s there to greet you, throwing open your door from the inside.

“Hey,” you whispered as soon as you got in, brushing back your hair flyaways from the wind.

Jean leaned over to hug you, keeping his right hand on the wheel while his left arm crossed his body, tucking you close against his neck. His stubbled chin brushed against your forehead. “You came,” he said, releasing you, as if nestled right in the crook of his shoulder wasn’t the most peaceful place on earth.

“We were on the phone less than five minutes ago,” you said, crossing your arms indignantly. “You think I’d ditch you like that?”

“Mmm, maybe, princess.” He flicked your nose before shifting the car back into drive. “You do have a history of flaking on me.”

“That was once, and I had just come back from surgery,” you sputtered, clicking your seatbelt. “I’m sorry I was knocked out and couldn’t answer your text.”

“Yeah, you should be.”

Impossible boy, but damn if you didn’t love him.

Jean cleared his throat as he pulled out of the driveway. You tried to ignore the way his arm rested behind your seat as he looked behind him, ever so cautious, calculating, and caring.

“Where are we going?” you asked, trying to focus on the lights spearing the darkness of night.

“The beach,” he replied, switching on his high-beams. “It’s somewhere I go for peace and quiet. Figured it might work for you, too.”

When he rested his hand on the gearshift, large and tantalizingly warm, it took everything in you not to grab it. He might not even notice, and if he did, would he think much of it? Physical affection was rife in your friend group, from Connie swinging his arms around to Sasha giving headpats for even the tiniest achievements. More than once since childhood you’ve fallen asleep in someone’s arms or had someone’s head in your lap while watching a movie. But in the last year there was an electric charge between you and him, a tension not unwelcome between every glance, as if every almost-touch was worth more than gold; his skin would feel wonderful, but oh, it was that almost-touch, fingertips ghosting over knuckles and lips skimming cheeks, that intoxicated you, made you so desperate for him.

“That sounds nice,” you choked out, giving way to the temptation of his hand so close to your leg. You rest yours on top of his, feather-light dragging against the skin. “Thank you.”

Jean swallowed, but gave you a smile, flipping his hand to cage yours underneath his, molding it against the knob of his gearshift. After that he kept his eyes on the road, but it gave you a pass to stare at him, how the moonlight illuminated his features.

The sweet smell of a barbershop filled the air, mingling with the salty spray from the cliffside ocean just to your left. It led you to examine his hair--swept back underneath his backwards baseball cap, his undercut fresh and fuzzy beneath. Where could he have gotten his hair cut at 3 a.m.? He’d likely never tell you, and you’d likely never know, but that was his little mystery to contain, just as you had your own.

Light glinted off the black studs in his ears and the silver chain hooked around his neck. A devil in the details but an angel in this car. Why was he so dressed up so late at night, when you were still in your pajamas? Had he even gone to bed?

Like a good boy he kept his eyes on the road, the only communication when he squeezed your hand when he used it to change gears. He swore he’d teach you how to drive his car one day, but you sensed he liked the control it gave him. He was competitive, if those detention slips and fistfights with Eren taught you anything. He liked being in the know.

Plus, not just anyone drove his car.

Tension mounted until you thought it would break, snapping like steel, but before it could he was smoothing the car to a stop and shifting your hand into park. Ever the gentleman, he got out first and hopped over the hood to your side, opening it with ease. The absence of his hand on yours was sobering, but then he extended it again to help you out of the car, reviving the butterflies, and held it as he led you to the front.

“This ground’s uneven,” he muttered, like it could excuse his actions. “Don’t trip.”

A fall off this cliff would mean certain death, so it was nice he cared. “So considerate,” you whispered, only met with his scoff.

“Yeah, well, if I didn’t have you, then I would be stuck with Connie and Sasha alone,” he moaned. “And don’t get me wrong, I love them to death, but sometimes I need peace and quiet, and you provide that for me. So no, I don’t want you tripping over your own ass and falling off a cliff.”

He flexed his hand so you could feel his strength. A rush washed over you. He trusted himself to keep you safe, and you trusted him, so much that if you had to choose him or the sun, you’d bask in his warmth every single day.

“Thanks. That means a lot.” It was the quietest mumble, but he heard it, deftly running his thumb over your knuckles before pulling away.

By now you were both comfortably settled against the hood of his car, facing the horizon over the edge of the cliff. A familiar spot, though tucked away and hidden from sight of most roads, but stunning, worth the seclusion for the moonrise it allowed you to see. Darkness faded in the light of the moon, bright though crescented, stitched among a canvas of stars above an azure blue sea, stretching out to the end of the world. Almost its own proper working galaxy, a private show from the cosmos that Jean wanted to share with you. At this elevation, you felt like you could reach out and wrap a star in your palm.

If he came here often to think...did this somehow remind him of you?

“This is…perfect,” you said, all air stolen from your lungs at the sight before you. He had somehow both caused and cured your insomnia.

Unbeknownst to you, his gaze lingered on your face, memorizing how wide your smile was, how your features were awash in moonlight, glazed in silver and dripping with saline. And to think he had caused it, he had done something as simple as driving you to a new spot had caused you so much happiness, tugged his stomach in a funny type of way.

“I wanted to share this with you,” he admitted. “I thought it might help.”

“Oh, Jean.” You turned to him, eyes aglow with candelight. “Thank you.”

Just the way you said his name sent a sharp feeling digging into his sides, satisfying, like reaching an itch he couldn’t quite scratch. A million thoughts leapt from his brain onto his tongue--You’re beautiful, I want you, I love you--but he swallowed them down like medicine, letting them burn like lead. If you didn’t feel the same, it would ruin a beautiful moment. He couldn’t do that to you. Not on this night. Not in this special place.

“You’re shivering,” he whispered, and he took off his outer shirt, a button-down one size too big that acted like a jacket over his henley tee, to drape loosely around your shoulders. He liked to layer his outfits; they were like barriers to his heart, yet he shed these layers to keep you warm, to keep you close to him.

“We can share the warmth,” you offered, tilting closer until your head rested against his shoulder and you could feel the nervous breath stuttering in his lungs.

He allowed his eyes to drift down your body, settling on the team logo emblazoned on your chest. The sweater was much too big on you, made for his broad shoulders and not your frame, but it suited you. He smirked, wrapping an arm around your waist, keeping you close--even sitting sedentary, the cliff worried him.

“You’re wearing my sweatshirt.”

“Yep.” You slide the sleeves over your hands, cushioning them to slap at him playfully.

He laughed, dodging your attacks but nimbly grabbing your wrists by the joint. “I’m not getting it back, am I,” he said, more of a defeated statement of fact than a question.

You giggled, and facing him from this angle, it’s like you were wearing the moon as a tiara. “Not unless you wanna see what’s underneath.”

Jean blinked, careful not to betray his surprise, “You’re saucy for three in the morning. What’s gotten into you?”

The playfulness in your core dies down, replaced with that familiar gnawing whenever his skin brushed yours. “Couldn’t sleep,” you shrugged.

When you shimmied your hips, Jean lifted you by the waist and helped you sit on the hood. He leaned back, using his hands to support himself, and despite your new elevation, he stood, all six-foot-two of him, towering over you. You balled your fists, pretending the sight didn’t make your knees weak.

“You know if you can’t sleep, you can always call me, right?” he asked carefully, keeping his eyes on the horizon.

“I don’t wanna bother you. You deserve to sleep, too.”

“You’re more important to me than that.” A hasty swallow, a breathy laugh. “Besides, everyone thinks I’m a big grump anyways, so it only adds to my image.”

“They only think that because you let them,” you said. “Why don’t you let people in? Why don’t you let them see what I see?”

He turned, hazel eyes charged with energy from the night sky. “What do you see, princess?”

“I see my best friend! I see the boy I grew up with now turned into a man, a man with his own morals and sense of truth and loyalty, who would never, ever leave me behind. I see a man too smart for his own good, someone who is capable and strong but doubts himself!” You’re out of breath, but the words just keep tumbling out. “I see a leader, a go-getter, someone honest and compassionate and true, who would die before he lets his friends down. That’s who I see, Jean, I see you as the man I fell in love with and I have no idea where I would be without you in my life.”

Somehow your hands had become entangled around his shoulders, pressing hot against his neck before sliding up his jaw to cup his cheeks, making him look at you shining with tears and love and moonlight. It spilled out of you like water, though your eyes were dry.

And that’s when something funny happened. He looked like he had just been punched in the gut because he had--you made him feel weak, stabbed right through the chink in the armor he so tightly fastened around his heart, but instead of deflating at the intrusion, he blossomed; with you his heart swelled till it burst, showering you in love and adoration and something shining brighter than the moon watching above your heads.

“I thought I’d never hear you say those words,” he gasped, laughing as he leaned his forehead down into yours. “I really--I didn’t--”

“Say what words?” you asked innocently, needing, bleeding, to hear him say it back.

“I love you. Oh my God, I love you so much, come here.”

Jean pulled you close on the hood and kissed you, so dizzying that it was a bit concerning, considering you two were perched on a cliff, but at that moment it didn’t matter; the moon could have dropped out of orbit, the world could have collapsed, you could have fallen from the sky and it wouldn’t have mattered, not as long as his lips were on yours.

He was warm in the cool night air, frenzied as you two fought with and against each other. It was less of a dance and more of a battle as all the tension from all those years rushed from one and into the other. It was all grabbing hands and knocking teeth and clawing fingers; you knocked off his cap as you tangled in his ash brown hair, and he nearly picked you up with how hard he was holding your waist.

Then, when common sense burrowed itself back into his brain, he leaned away, tongue severing the thin string of saliva tethering you. His absence drew a whimper from you as you struggled to open your eyes, so lost and drunk on this feeling, the feeling of finally and forever.

“Jean…” you whined, but he gently shushed you, trailing his thumb over your chin and swiping against your bottom lip before coming up to your cheekbone and caressing the soft skin.

What kind of man was he, kissing the girl he loved for the first time like a random hook-up at a party?

No, you were worth more than that, and you deserved more than that. He was a romantic, and you were his princess; he had to be gentle with you, soft, now that he held your heart in his hands.

“Most beautiful girl in the world,” he hummed, lightly pressing his lips below your ear, met with goosebumps flooding down your skin. “Let me give you a proper kiss.”

And he did. It was good and proper, sweet yet still feisty--this was more like the waltz you had envisioned sharing with him. In this one soft kiss, he let out every sensitive emotion, cupping your face in his hands as if it were glass, drinking from your lips as if you were a fountain that would never ever run dry.

Soft sighs and sounds escaped your diaphragm as you melted in his hands. You ran your fingers gingerly across his well-muscled biceps, dipping onto his chest, before settling contendly at his waist. Caressing him softly, you laved all the love you could into him, like he was the prize you deserved after a hard-fought life.

This was the I love you kiss.

Jean pulled away with a whisper of your name, dropping another kiss to your forehead before wrapping you up in a suffocating hug. “It feels so good to hold you like this,” he cooed, “in my arms, against my chest. Like...like I’ve always dreamed.” He perched his head on top of yours, humming, stroking up and down your back. “If I could stay right here with you forever, I would.”

“We can.”

“But finals…”

You hushed him with another kiss, one that had him laughing and blushing against your lips.

“Okay,” he grinned. “No finals talk. Not tonight.”

He squeezed you closer as the wind blew harder--the one downside of living on a cliffside beach--and you nosed along his neck. “Are you cold?”

Despite his shaking head, you squirmed out of his embrace and began peeling off the shirt he had given you, but he gently stopped your hands, intertwining them with his.

“Keep it. You look good wearing my clothes,” he said, to which you had a physical reaction to his sincerity.

“Aww, you’re blushing like a rose.” He leaned down and pecked the space between your eyes. “Don’t be embarrassed. ‘S cute, princess.”

“Gonna keep calling me that?”

“Mmmhm.” He kissed the tip of your nose, a self-satisfied smirk playing on his lips. “Because you’re my pretty little flower, my princess. For as long as you’ll have me.”

“That will be a very long time, my love.”

This cliff high above the waves was made for childhood friends, for the lovers who always knew but couldn’t act, for the breathless and wild, for the safe and secure, a place to talk and dream and adore in the other’s arms, kissed by moonlight and blessed by the stars.

-

Kofi

all too well: kuroo tetsuro

☞ a/n: NOT ANGST!! i HEAVILY HC that kuroo loves and listens to taylor swift secretly. this is him when all too well (10 min version) comes out and y’all are in a relationship. italicized quotes are lyrics/kuroo singing. lyrics and song are obviously not mine! credits and ownership goes to ms. taylor swift <3

☞ cw: one paragraph of SMALL angst, language, all too well by taylor swift is heartbreaking, y/n watching kuroo sing his heart out

5:48 pm

“tadaima!” you yell through your shared house with your boyfriend. your home was tiny but cozy. it was almost 6 so the room was almost dark when you arrived. kuroo was off from work today and you expected a response back but you didn’t hear anything. instead, you hear music through the walls of your house. you guessed that he just didn’t hear you. you take off your shoes and make your room until you hear:

“…you almost ran the red 'cause you were looking over at me. wind in my hair, i was there, i remember it all too well…”

“taylor swift?” you thought to yourself. you and kuroo have been dating since high school, but through that whole period, kuroo has never mentioned an interest to taylor swift.

“and you were tossing me the car ke- FUCK THE PATRIARCHY”

a voice that was very much your boyfriend’s interrupted your thoughts. you silently and slightly opened the door peeking through the crack, hoping to not be seen. you saw your handsome boyfriend on the bed with the laptop open, in a blanket. slightly crying?? yes. your 6ft tall bf, high school volleyball captain, employee at Japan Volleyball Association is curled in a blanket crying to taylor swift.

“CAUSE THERE WE ARE AGAIN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT”

you grab your phone from your pocket and start recording this phenomenon, crouched on the floor, through the crack of the door. this is gonna be interesting you whispered and chuckled to yourself as you hit record.

“WE’RE DANCING ROUND THE KITCHEN IN THE REFRIGERATOR LIGHT. DOWN THE STAIRS I WAS THERE I REMEMBER IT ALL TOO WELLL”

you giggled softly watch your boyfriend scream the lyrics in “pain.” this is the man you fell in love with back then. the same dorky, cocky, sweet, charming guy. your kuroo tetsuro. it’s moments like these that remind you how you fell for him. it’s moments like these that you think about when one of you are far away on a business trip.

“GOD DAMMIT TAYLOR- AND YOU CALL ME UP AGAIN JUST TO BREAK ME LIKE A PROMISE. SO CASUALLY CRUEL IN THE NAME OF BEING HONEST. I’M A CRUMPLED PIECE OF PAPER LYING HERE CAUSE I REMEMBER IT ALL TOO FUCKING WELL”

you’re full on muffling your mouth in your sleeve so he won’t hear your laughter over the music, even though it was blasting on the blue jbl speaker. kuroo then starts sobbing and cursing at taylor for “being a musical genius and stomping on his heart” you did feel a little bit bad for eavesdropping on him while he’s singing and sobbing his heart out, but you know it’ll be over soon, and he’ll take you in his arms again.

you started thinking what it’d really be like if kuroo broke up with you. there’ll be no one walking to your desk with dinner making sure you eat your meals and not overworking yourself. there’d be no one to cuddle while you talk about each other’s days until you fall asleep. no more dancing in the kitchen while eating snacks because you couldn’t sleep at 3 am. life would be terribly different and even you started to tear up. you stopped thinking about it before you become the mess kuroo is listening to taylor swift.

“and i was never good at telling jokes but the punchline goes ‘i’ll get older but your lovers stay my age.’- AGHHH FUCK IT HURTSSSSS”

as the outro plays and the atmosphere calms, so does kuroo. he then grabs his phone and you end your recording. immediately after, your screen lights up with the name “my love <3” and a picture of you and kuroo making wacky faces. you stand up and open the door as you answer the call.

“you okay lover boy?” you ask looking at him softly walking closer to where he was on the bed. he stares back at you with wide eyes wondering how long you’ve been there, how much you’ve seen, and wondering when you even got home.

“when uh when did you get home 😅?”

“mmm when was it? around the wind in your hair part”

“YOU SAW THAT WHOLE THING?!”

you giggle slightly at his antics. you make your way to the bed next to him and looked at him. his hair was slightly messed up from the blanket around him and his eyes were bloodshot red. with how wet his face was from his tears, you guessed he’s been listening to this song for quite a while. “yes, i did. i never knew you had a thing for taylor swift”

“i guess my secret is out the bag. i’ve kept this ‘interest’ as you call it hidden from even the volley ball team. ONLY KENMA KNOWS TOO. sigh…random question but y/n do-”

“yes tetsuro i still love you. don’t worry your handsome face about it. just because you listened to taylor swift’s breakup song doesn’t mean i no longer love you,” you tell him as you pepper kisses on his face while wiping his tears. “taylor swift makes you really vulnerable wow usually it’s me in your position.”

“IT’S NOT MY FAULT HE WAS A BITCH YOU NEED TO WATCH IT TO UNDERSTAND,” he exclaims offended. he looks back at you and he smiles softly at you. he loves you so much. he doesn’t even want to think about losing you. you’re his love, his honey, his “dopamine,” literally his high school sweetheart. he loves you more than life itself. “but later. you need to convince ‘my handsome face’ that you won’t break up with me bc taylor and jake broke up.”

“honey you’re smart but that logic doesn’t add up. i will spend every second with you to prove how much i love you my love. never forget that.”

he chuckled at that, “same with you sweetheart. you’re my everything,” he replies back pressing a kiss to your temple sniffling. one day, when you guys are old and grey, happily married, you’ll look back and reminisce. remembering moments like these (positively) all too well.

nekoma masterlist haikyuu masterlist main masterlist

🥺🥺🥺

aot men as feelings/memories.

Part One

Eren is the feeling of sitting on the roof of your old high school. Trying to hide when you see police lights in the distance, knowing they were intended for the two of you. Climbing down the ladder after Eren, his hands wrap around your body to carry you down the last few rungs of the ladder because they were getting closer. Holding hands as you run through the shortcut you each knew well that went through the woods behind the school. Stopping momentarily to kiss deeply, pulling away, panting and laughing.

Eren is sneaking out of your window, knowing damn well your parents would kill you if they knew you had left in the middle of the night but not caring because any punishment was worth just one minute with Eren.

Eren is a bar fight that results in him getting arrested, beating the hell out of some creep that kept touching you. He kisses you as he is put into the back of the police car, a smile across his face and a wink before they slam the car door.

Eren is crying in your arms about how much he loves you. How he’s never felt this way. How he can’t ever lose you. How you were made to love one another.

Eren is asking you to marry him with a candy ring. It seems like a joke. But he means it. God, does he mean it. “I’m a fuck up. I don’t do the right thing. I don’t know what I’m doing. But I know whatever it is, I want to do it with you. I want this forever. Marry me. I mean it. Marry me.”

Eren is dumb decisions. Danger. Tears and fights. Sleepless nights full of skin on skin. Jealousy. Deep, passionate love. Love preserved only for soulmates.

Eren is marriage at a young age.

Eren is a marriage that lasts forever.

Armin is the feeling of stopping off on the side of the road because you saw a field of horses on a long road trip and begged him to stop so you could pet the one horse that was close to the fence by the road.

Armin is a soft whisper of an apology after a fight.

Armin is constant reassurance of, “you’re so beautiful.” “you’re all i want. forever.”

Armin is gushing about you when you’re not around. Talking about everything he loves about you. Comments like “oh yeah, that’s y/n’s favorite-”

Armin is soft prayers at night of “I don’t know if there’s anyone up there. Or if anyone’s listening, but let me have her forever. Please. Don’t ever take her away from me. I’ll do anything.”

Armin is taking pictures of you in a field of pretty flowers in your favorite dress.

Armin is the unbelievable, overwhelming feeling of “I’m going to spend the rest of my life with her.” as he watches you twirl around in the bright sunflowers, your beauty outshining it all.

Armin is gentle love. Constant Public Displays of Affection. Quick, sweet pecks against your forehead. Kisses littered across your face accompanied by a plethora of “I love you’s!”

Levi is the feeling of late night drinks on a rooftop bar in the city. The city skyline is twinkling just as the stars above, one arm wrapped around your waist and holding the railing as you look out past the buildings, head rested on the shoulder of the man you loved the most.

Levi is not having to pump gas yourself since you first started this relationship. Whether you were driving or not, it didn’t matter. He was far too insistent and you gave up arguing with the gesture.

Levi is low hums as he folds the laundry, bringing the freshly washed and still warm blanket to you in the other room where you were doing work, wrapping it around your shoulders before placing a soft kiss to the top of your head.

Levi is deep, passionate kisses while doing the most random of tasks, leaving you breathless before he walks away as if it was just an innocent act.

Levi is picking you up from your spot on the couch and carrying you to bed after falling asleep halfway through a movie you promised you wouldn’t fall asleep during because, “Baby, I’m not even that tired. I promise.”

Levi is a hand on your thigh every time you’re in the car. Even if you’re in the middle of an argument. Even when you tell him to fuck off.

Levi is an arm instinctively thrown out across your chest to push you back against the seat when “some fucking moron” pulls out in front of him, causing him to slam on the brakes.

Levi is feeling secure every second of being with him.

Levi is knowing you have someone who would not hesitate to kill and die for you.

Levi is tears slowly forming and spilling over to streak his face as he looks up to see you walking towards him at the end of the aisle as he stands at the altar. Walking towards the rest of your life.

Jean is the feeling of hugs from behind and a cheesy greeting of hands over your eyes and a “Guess who!”

Jean is texts of “Have you eaten?” “Do you need anything?” “i’m proud of you.”

Jean is unexpected small gifts because “I saw this at the store and it reminded me of you.”

Jean is flowers on a random Tuesday because “it’s been two weeks since I got you flowers, I’m slacking.”

Jean is dancing in the rain.

Jean is being parked on a cliff above the city just like in the movies, sitting on the hood of the car as you listen to whatever new indie artist he liked.

Jean is the first time “i love you” is uttered as you share two ear buds, holding hands as you lay upon the same car hood, staring up at the sky. His eyes filling with tears as he turned his face to the side, watching you as you close your eyes, gradually letting the music invade all of your thoughts before he spoke up, ripping you from your trance. “I’m so in love with you.”

Jean is going out with friends and never once making you feel bad when you ask to go home a bit earlier than expected, an immediate “Okay, baby. Let’s head out.”

Jean is wanting to grow together, experiencing every milestone together.

Jean is applying to the same schools as you after graduating. Opening your letters at the same time, both of you accepted, jumping up and down with the biggest of smiles, kissing as he congratulates you, “We’re going to take on the world together, baby. This is the start of forever.”

Jean is crossing the stage with you as you now graduate college together. Ready to walk through life hand in hand. Just like he promised four years ago; forever.

Connie is the feeling of a late night swim in the ocean. Waves freezing and beating against your torsos. Splashing water and squealing each time you felt the cold drops come your way.

Connie is body shaking laughter, tears streaming down your face, hardly a sound coming from your throat. Adding onto each other’s scenarios to make it funnier and funnier.

Connie is 3am drives to grab food at a drive thru before coming home and watching food competition shows where he swears he “could cook better than those amateurs. How do you forget the fondant?!! Idiots!”

Connie is inviting everyone you know over the second you buy your new home together, a huge family dinner, looking around at all of the people you now consider family. Thinking, if you could freeze any moment and live it over again for the rest of your life, it would be this. It would be Sasha and Mikasa helping you set the table. Eren and Jean teasing Connie about “You let her talk you into a rock that big? Damn, Connie, you’re down bad.” as Sasha and Mikasa told them to shut up, that your new engagement ring was worth more than their entire existence.

Connie is never a dull moment. Connie is spontaneity. Connie is new adventures the second you say “I wanna go here”.