Renowned The World Over For Their Preternaturally Calm Demeanour, Capybaras Are Often Assigned As Companion

Renowned the world over for their preternaturally calm demeanour, Capybaras are often assigned as companion dogs to people with anxiety disorders. While there have been no formal studies as to the efficacy of these chilled-out canine assistants, anecdotal evidence suggests they have a fairly significant anxiolytic effect. Above, a Capybara companion sits and waits with their assigned human (a backpacker with agoraphobia) while they tie their shoelaces.

After growing out of their childhood full of unfortunate musical tastes, Great Crested Grebes will often smoothly transition into cosplay. Like their distant cousins the Royal Terns, they tend towards cosplay of characters from moving picture shows or television serials. Above, a Great Crested Grebe parent pretends to be the Dilophosaurus which kills Dennis Nedry in the smash-hit docudrama Jurassic Park directed by Steven Spielberg.

Masterful storytellers, Blue-eyed Shags are sought out the world over for their creativity and narrative sensibility. While very few of their tales have ever been traditionally published, their most resonant stories are often adapted by other species into culturally-appropriate versions. Unfortunately, these poet-inclined Phalacrocoracidae are rarely monetarily compensated for their creative effort or editing expertise; instead they offered vague assurances that the exposure will be “like, totally worth the same as cash”.

Above: a Shag parent tells the ancient morality play of the Three Little Shags and the Big Bad Skua, which is at it’s core an allegorical lesson about the legal protections and enforceability offered by verbal agreements, napkin-backed contracts, and notarized terms and conditions.

Unfortunate victims of a bio-engineering programme gone horribly wrong, Surf Scoters live every moment of their life with a whole dinosaur skull in place of a bill. Fortunately for these malformed Melanitta the skull's mouth and nostrils are connected to the Scoter’s digestive and respiratory systems, but control of the skullmouth is retained entirely by the restless spirit of the long-dead dinosaur. 

Above, a Scoter grapples with the terrifying reality it is forced to endure while the grafted skull enjoys a tasty snack.

Incapable of traditional flight, Western Meadowlarks maneuver through the world by leaping with powerful legs. Capable of jumping three times their body’s length completely vertically, these springy Sturnella are hardly hampered by the lack of flying ability; many casual observers have been fooled into believing they take wing due to the speed and precision of their numerous jumps. Above, a pair of meadowlarks judge the leaping form of a third.

no bird today

still recovering from burial ceremony for a friend of mine and general social hangover

as apology have this happy kale runt that i felt enough pity for when i was thinning them a month back that i made an impromptu hydroponic growing container out of an iced tea bottle.