NAHHHHH

NAHHHHH

Also, i wanted to say, your PFP >>>>>>

He may not be my bias but he is a cutiepie

skz - you bleed through your pants during practice

pairing: ot8 x member!afab!reader warnings: crack, fluff summary: you bleed through your pants during dance practice screenshot count: 5

©amyysfics (2023) All Rights Reserved - Reposting/Modification of any kind is not tolerated.

Taglist: @notastraykid, @hee0soo, @moon0fthenight, @bbyquokka

AHHHH SAENGIL CHUKHAEYO! 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼

happy birthday to me!

it's been a rough journey getting to 23 but i'm still here ¡!¡!¡!

Pairing : BF!Han Jisung x F!Reader TW : established relationship ; arguing ; panicked Jisung ; kind of angsty but mainly fluff ; a little suggestive at the end ; Word Count : 3.0k Request : @moon0fthenight : a hanji fic (angst cause its ur forte OFC) where you have a small argument with him, and so you give him space understandingly, but he misunderstands your intention and thinks that you are givjng silent treatment so breaks down with a panic attack and vents all his work struggle and you comfort him

“Thank you!” You chimed as you grabbed the carry out bag from the girl working the window, making sure it wouldn’t tip over before moving out of the drive-thru lane and heading back out on the road again. 

Jisung and the rest of 3RACHA had been working late nights yet again, staying up until the crack of dawn trying to perfect the songs that would be coming out in the next album that hadn’t even been announced yet. They were always ahead, but you worried about them and their lack of rest. That’s just one of the reasons you were heading out to the studio right now, the scent of grease from the fast food filling your car, and while you knew it wasn’t the healthiest meal, you wanted it to be something quick that they could munch on, and then hopefully they’d all decide to just head on home and get some sleep when they were done eating. 

Making your way into the building and over to the elevator, you clutched the bag in one hand and the cup holder in the other hand against your chest, hoping that you wouldn’t accidentally drop or spill any on your way to the studio. It was a surprise, you wanted the guys, especially Jisung, to know that you cared about them. 

As you walked down the hallway, the soda in the cups sloshing against the plastic lids, you could hear them faintly talking behind one of the doors. The light of Chans computer slipped through the crack between the actual door and the frame, and you wondered just how focused they had been on working that they didn’t even shut the door all the way. 

At least it would make it easier for you to get into the room, and you nudged the door with your hip to push it open further, flashing your brightest smile to the guys who all looked up at you with the most confused looks. “Jisung…” Changbin muttered to your boyfriend who sighed heavily before pushing himself up off the couch. 

“It’s late… What are you doing here?” He asked as he walked over to you, eyeing the food that you were holding before his eyes moved back up to your face. It surely wasn’t the reaction that you were expecting, but you wrote it off as them just being tired. 

You held up the food bag, your smile never faltering, although it felt like the guys in the room were less than happy that you had come in. “I brought you all some food, you’ve been working so hard. I just wanted to check up on you three…” You explained, finally setting the bag of food down on the little side table before placing down the cup holder as well. “I was wondering when you’d come home… I’m worried about you all.” 

“Jisung…” Chan now said his name, more sternly this time as he swiveled his chair around, removing the headphones from his ears and dangling them around his neck. They were all staring at you, and the looks that you were getting from the three were a mixture of annoyance, irritation, and even a little bit of anger. 

“Sorry, hyung…” Jisung mumbled, placing his hand on the small of your back and leading you out of the studio and back into the hallway. “You don’t have to check up on me. I’m not a baby.” Jisung said sharply once he had gotten you out of the room, and the words hit you a little harder than they probably would have if he had just said them over a call or through text. “If I’m not home, and I’m not answering your calls or your texts, then just assume I’m busy and don’t bother me. This is setting us back. You’re setting us back right now.” 

You had gone out of your way to make sure they were fed, you had done it out of the kindness of your heart, because you cared about your boyfriend and you cared about his friends, and they were all looking at you like some sort of burden. It was one thing for Chan and Bin to look at you that way, you didn’t really care, but for your boyfriend to see you in that light, that was painful. “I was just… I was trying to make sure you ate… I wanted to make sure you were okay…” You whispered, trying to swallow down the lump that was forming in your throat. 

Jisungs eyes were like daggers as he rolled them, shadowed in the low light of the dimly lit hallway. “I didn’t ask for that. You came here unannounced, we were doing good, we were almost finished. I just need some space, that’s all I’m asking for. Space and time to get done the things I need to do. You think you can manage to let me have that?” 

While you hoped that he didn’t really mean the things that he was saying, you couldn’t be sure considering the fact that he sounded so serious right now. “Y-Yeah… I’m sorry…” Was all you could manage to say. What else could you say to that? You didn’t come here expecting an argument, you didn’t come here thinking that he’d be mad at you for surprising him. You had been completely sideswiped by his and the other guys' reactions, and all you could do was feel the pain from his words as you backtracked down the hallway, the sound of the door slamming shut echoing off the walls on either side of you. 

Space… Time and space… That’s what he needed, and that’s what you’d give him. With much thought, you realized that he was just working hard, and maybe you were a little bit overbearing at times, but that’s just because you loved him, you cared about him. It was hard, but you’d give him what he needed so he and the guys could get done what they needed to do, and then when that was over, you’d be able to talk to him hopefully. 

You packed a couple clothes and other necessities into a small bookbag, heading to your parents house under the pretense that you missed them and the house felt lonely without Jisung there. It wasn’t exactly a lie, but you weren’t going to tell your parents about the small tiff that you and your boyfriend got into either. You’d stay there for a couple days, not just to give him the space, but to keep yourself from overthinking about his words, because while you had come to the conclusion that he didn’t actually mean them, it didn’t change the fact that they still hurt. 

It was easy to keep yourself busy while you were there. You hadn’t seen your family in so long, that a better half of your stay was just you catching up with them and talking to them about how things had been since you were gone. You went shopping and helped with dinner and chores, and you spent late nights staying up watching shows with your mom just to make up for missed time. You barely even had your phone on you, let alone the time to check it for texts. 

“Hey babe, we finished working on the album! Wanna celebrate with us?” “Totally cool if you don’t want to do a group celebration. Maybe you and I can go out for dinner or something?” “I miss you, I haven’t seen you in a bit. I’m coming home today, I spent the night at the dorms, I can’t wait to sleep in our bed with you again.” “Are you busy with work or something? You haven’t answered in a whole 24 hours and that’s totally not like you… I love you!!” “I came home and you’re not here… You’re just working… Right?” “Your toothbrush is gone…” “Your brush is gone…” “Your clothes and your bookbag are gone… I really hope that maybe we just got robbed and you’re at work right now or something because I’m getting kinda scared…” “Babe…?” “I know that what I said wasn’t nice and I’m sorry, please don’t leave me. I love you so much, you don’t understand.” “Baby, please. I’m getting scared, I’m really scared. Tell me you’re coming back. Just call me. Please I didn’t mean it!”

When you finally got to check your phone close to the end of your visit, your entire lock screen was filled with notifications from him, and when you checked them, you silently cursed yourself for not checking your phone more often while you were there. The last thing you wanted to do was to make him think that you were actually mad at him, but you knew how he was, and you knew he was probably freaking out already considering the last message was sent a day ago. If he wasn’t panicking to the other guys at the moment, you were sure he was lying in bed crying. 

“Ji ended up coming back home a little earlier than we thought.” You excused yourself as you walked through the living room with your bag swung over your shoulder. “I had a great time, I’ll come back and do this again soon, I promise.” You hated having to leave your family on such short notice, but with Jisungs anxiety and you knew how he could get, you were worried about leaving him alone for too long with the assumption swimming in his head that you had actually left him. 

“Oh no, that’s okay. Next time you come up, bring him with you. We haven’t seen him in a while either.” Your mom said, cheerful and still unaware of the reason behind your presence and the reason for your rushed departure. “I love you, come back soon, okay?” You nodded in agreement, taking an extra second to give everyone a hug before running out the front door and throwing your stuff in the backseat before climbing into the front and starting the drive back home. 

You had tried to call him on your drive back home, and either he didn’t have his phone on him, or he was actively ignoring you, because he wasn’t picking up and that scared you even more. As you pulled up to the house, the sun was just beginning to set, but none of the lights in the house were on. Was he even home? 

Not even bothering to grab your bags from the back, you jumped out of the car and ran up to the front door, fumbling with your keys to unlock it only to realize that it hadn’t been locked at all. Usually he would lock the door no matter what, worried about crazed fans or even just robbers breaking in and hurting either you, him, or both. Your heart was already racing as you slowly stepped into the dark house, not even bothering to kick off your shoes as you flicked on the lights and made your way around. 

Everything felt quiet, too quiet, too still, and you worried that maybe he really had left after you failed to respond to his texts. You were about to leave, go to the dorms to see if he was there or if any of the other guys knew where he was, when you heard the toilet flush and the slight creak of the bathroom door as it opened. “Ji?” You questioned softly, feeling more like the main character in a horror movie right now than a worried girlfriend. 

All those fears subsided though when you heard him gasp, the hall light flicking on and revealing your boyfriend, his hair disheveled and his eyes bloodshot, his cheeks and the tip of his nose blushed a dark pink and his lips chapped from breathing a little too much and a little too heavily. “Y/N…” He croaked out your name, but he didn’t move from the center of the hallway and the domed light above his head was more like a spotlight on him in contrast to the darkness of the rest of the house. 

“I thought you left.” You whispered, finally taking the time to take off your shoes before walking over to him. “Why were all the lights out? It’s so dark… You could have tripped over something and hurt yourself.” You quietly scolded him, your fingers gingerly moving his hair out of his face only to realize that it had been curtaining just how sad he truly looked. 

“I thought you left…” He retorted, but he didn’t move away from your touch, he actually seemed to melt into it. “The light hurt my eyes… I was crying so much… I thought you were gone. I… I didn’t know what to do, and you weren’t answering my texts, I didn’t even know if they went through and none of the guys knew where you were. I got into an argument with Chan and Changbin… I was so scared…” He rambled, and your heart ached for him, knowing that you put him through so much. 

Your arms moved down to wrap around his waist, burying your face in his chest, breathing in the comforting scent of him that you had missed so much while you were away. “I would never leave you… You said that you needed space… That’s what I was giving you.” You explained, and his silence afterwards had you pulling back, looking up at him to see the fresh tears that were spilling down his cheeks as his eyebrows furrowed and his bottom lip trembled. 

“I don’t know why I said that…” He shakily mumbled, his hand moving up to the back of your head to pull you against his chest once more, like he was truly scared that you’d leave him again. “I was just so busy with the new album and… It’s so stressful sometimes working with them. I just wanted to get done and come home to you… And… I fucked up, I know I did.” 

“No you didn’t…” Your words were slightly muffled by his shirt, but you hoped that he heard you. “Baby… Ji, listen…” You moved your head back and then took a step back so you could look at him, but your motion had his eyes widening with panic as his hands reached out to you again. “I know that you get stressed, and I know that sometimes I can be a little… overbearing-” 

“N-No… You’re not… I love when you come visit me at work. I love when you show me that you care.” He cut you off, his chest rising and falling heavily as he verged closer to having another anxiety attack and you quickly shushed him, rushing back into his arms, and while the one on the receiving end of the hug would usually be the one comforted, you knew that allowing him to hug you was comforting enough to him. 

“You didn’t let me finish…” You murmured, making sure that your mouth wasn’t squished against his chest this time so he would really hear you. “I know that I can be overbearing sometimes… but it’s because I love you, and I care about you, and I don’t want you to overwork yourself. I know that you get tired, and when you’re tired, you get kind of grumpy. I wasn’t mad about what you said… It was kind of upsetting, but I understood that it didn't come from a place of anger… You were just exhausted, and you were stressed… And I wasn’t… I would never leave you because of that.” You tilted your head up to look at him, your own eyes glossing over with your own tears that seemed to form just from seeing his. “Did you at least eat what I brought you guys?” You asked, trying to slightly verge the topic from being so sad, and he sheepishly chuckled as his head nodded. 

“Yeah… And I felt like shit about it too. We all did… My burger was extra salty because of my tears.” He answered, and you couldn’t help but laugh as you tightened your arms around his waist, nuzzling into his chest. “I’m just glad you’re home… I missed you so much… And… And next time you come to the studio to surprise me, I’ll let you sit on my lap and I’ll hold you… I think you being there will make me feel better.” 

You hummed softly, nodding in agreement to his words. “If that’s what you’ll do next time I come to the studio, I’ll have to visit more often.” You lightly teased, moving your arms up to drape around his neck as you pulled him down just enough to press a kiss to his lips. “I missed you too.” You murmured against his lips, feeling the corners pull up slightly as his fingers fisted the loose fabric of the t-shirt you were wearing. 

“Please do… I’ll just kick the guys out if I want to be alone with you…” His voice was low now as he slowly began to back you up towards the bedroom. “Can I make it up to you… For upsetting you… For being awful and rude…?” 

You smirked as you pulled back to look at him, your eyes narrowed suspiciously. “Mm… I don’t know… I think you just want to get me in bed…” You jokingly remarked, although you weren’t really against the idea, your finger hooked into the bottom of his shirt as you lightly pulled him along with you until your knees hit the edge of the bed and you fell back onto it. 

“It might be a little bit of that too…” He mused, falling onto the bed over top of you and holding himself up just enough on his elbows. “But I want to show you that I love you… How much I appreciate you…” He dipped down, his lips latching onto your neck, and you could feel through his shirt that his body was burning up. God you loved this man, you loved everything about him, and when his lips finally got done working on the the exposed skin of your neck and he looked down at you with eyes that were both so dark, but so bright at the same time, you knew that you’d do anything for him as long as you got to be with him forever. He was everything to you, and you could tell by the way that he looked at you that you were everything to him. “Can I?” 

Permanent TL : @whatudowhennooneseesyou @duchesskaren @mytherapisttoldmenotto @lovesunshinefelix @moon0fthenight @kurolils @maruskz @hello-2-u-from-me @mrswolfiechan @bunnychangbin @his-angell @if-spearb @yomomma104 @lanatheawesome @facelesswrittes @grannyindehouse

Pairing : Seo Changbin x F!Reader TW : reader suffers from migraines ; arguments ; i'm gonna make this one absolutely vicious, i love writing arguments ; angst of course as usual ; Word Count : 2.6k Request : @kurolils : I'll try not to give a lot of details cause it's your story not mine but I was thinking of something angsty (ofc wtf) with changbin (ofc wtf) , like the reader and him got into a really bad argument (you can decide the plot of that) and she has really bad migraines (I'm relating here) so when they're mad at each other, she doesn't want to be pushy pr clingy so she doesn't say anything to him but when the migraine gets like really bad, she calls him :) AN : migraines are so fricking bad and I hope yours don't affect you too badly :'( BUT! It definitely isn't abusive to send in another request, send in all the requests you want!!! I love it! I love your ideas! And Binnie definitely needs more attention in my ask box (and in my masterlist)!

Here comes another one, you thought to yourself as you squeezed your eyes shut, trying to mentally ward off the sudden throbbing in your head, pinging right behind your eye. Just one more hour until you could get off work and go home, and then you’d see your boyfriend who always managed to make you feel better… Although you weren’t sure if the migraine actually went away or if his presence alone was enough to have you forgetting that it was there in the first place. 

“Is it bothering you again?” Your coworker asked, leaning across the counter that you had been slouched over, trying to block out anything that would only add to the pain in your head. You simply grunted in agreement, not daring to lift your head, worried that the bright fluorescent lights would only trigger the migraine to start full force once again. “It’s dead here today, you can go home if you want. I’m sure the last thing you want to deal with are customers.” 

He was right, the store was always dead at the beginning of the week, and you hated being scheduled those days. “You’re sure you’ll be okay?” You asked, your head still buried in your arms. He hummed softly in agreement, gently patting your shoulder before making his way around to the back of the counter to take your spot. “Thanks… I’ll cover one of your shifts if you ever need me to.” You said as quietly as possible, worried that your own voice meeting your ears would only worsen the throbbing in your head. 

“Don’t worry about that, just text me when you get home so I know you made it there okay.” And you nodded to his words, pulling your sunglasses out of your bag and placing them on before walking out of the store. He was always so nice, he looked out for you, and in a way, he reminded you a lot of your boyfriend, that’s why it was so easy to get so close to him. You’d have to remember to thank him when you got home, but all that was on your mind right now was the pleasant thought of going home, closing all the blinds, and waiting that extra hour for Changbin to get home so you could cuddle up next to him. 

You hadn’t realized that you had fallen asleep on the couch, but you were actually quite happy that you did. By the time Changbin walked through the front door and your eyes slowly opened, it felt like you were in the clear, the banging pain in your head had all but completely subsided. “You’re home early.” Changbin commented, noticing that all the windows had been practically blacked out by the shutters and the shades, he knew what it meant, and he kept his voice as low as possible as he kicked off his shoes and walked over to the couch where you were laying. “Did it get bad again?” 

Slowly nodding your head, you pushed yourself up into a sitting position and stretched, ready to make room for Changbin to scoot in beside you. “Jaemin saw that I was hurting and he said I could go home… Oh… Shit, I have to text him to thank him.” You muttered, pulling your phone out and unlocking it, so focused on sending out the text that you didn’t even hear Changbins sigh of annoyance. “Did you want to order something to eat and watch a movie or something?” You asked after sending out the text, placing your phone down on the coffee table and scooting over. 

“Why don’t you just ask Jaemin to come over and watch the movie with you.” Changbin mumbled, eyeing the spot that you made beside yourself for him to sit in before dropping down into the recliner behind him. “He can even take you out to a fancy dinner or something.” The thumping in your head was slowly returning, accompanied by the pounding of your heart that you could hear in your ears, although you weren’t sure if it was racing because you were upset or because you were angry. 

Changbin had never made such accusations before, and while he hadn’t flat out accused you of such a thing, you could read into his words and his tone and you knew exactly what he meant. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. You’re just being ridiculous.” You muttered, deciding to stretch out on the couch once more since he was being that way. “Do you want to order dinner or not?” You asked, not even bothering to open your eyes as you asked the question. 

“I don’t know, maybe we should ask Jaemin what he wants just in case he comes over to check on you.” Changbin snidely retorted and your eyes rolled behind your eyelids as you let out a small huff of air through your nose. “Or maybe… maybe I should just go back to the dorms and you and Jaemin can enjoy a nice little dinner in my house watching my TV.” He sounded so cocky and truthfully it was disgusting, and it made your head hurt worse. 

“I’d argue with you, I’d give you that satisfaction if my head wasn’t already pounding… But you knew that when you came in and you continue to bicker. So maybe you should leave, or maybe I should leave. Clearly you’ve got some shit going on, and truthfully, I can’t fucking handle it right now.” You snapped, taking a deep breath and sinking deeper into the cushions of the sofa, waiting to hear the sound of the recliner moving back into place when Changbin got up, but it was silent. Was he just going to sit there and continue the foolish argument until your head felt like it was going to explode? 

The short answer… Yes. Yes he would. “If I leave you’ll just have him come over… And if you leave, you’ll just run to him. Either way you and him are getting exactly what you want, right? Why string me along if he’s so much better? Huh?” You honestly didn’t know where this was coming from, but the more he assumed, the angrier you got. 

“You know what? It’s fucking bullshit that you come in here, pretending to give a shit about me, saying shit like… like people at my work should be more understanding of what I go through… And then when there’s one fucking employee who does notice, who does understand, you jump to these batshit insane conclusions that couldn’t be further from the truth. Nothing will make you happy! My head hurts enough already, and then trying to think of ways to fucking please you only makes it hurt worse. So if you’re going to just keep coming at me, I’d rather you not… Or at least wait until I can take another ibuprofen and my headache clears up enough to handle more of your bullshit.” You snapped, your voice cracking as your throat closed up. You were on the verge of tears, although it wasn’t from being upset, it was from being angry and in pain and you just wanted to sleep it all away. 

“You know what, I’ll just go.” Changbins hands flew up in the air before slapping down against his lap as he pushed himself up to his feet. “Make sure Jaemin takes his shoes off before he walks on my carpet though.” He always had to have that last word, the last jab of the knife. If you had the energy, you would have flipped him off, but you were just exhausted. You didn’t have the energy to fight, you didn’t even want to fight, he had started it. It wasn’t until you heard the front door slam shut that you finally let yourself cry, but even that was tiresome, and you ended up just crying yourself to sleep. 

You weren’t quite sure how much time had passed, but you were happy to see that the sun had finally set, unless it was in the wee hours of the morning and it was just about to rise. That happiness quickly died when you remembered what had happened right before you fell asleep, the sudden lonely feeling and the feeling of emptiness shrouding you like a cloak as you looked around the empty apartment.

At the moment, it didn’t matter though. You knew that he was okay, he was probably at the dorms with the guys having a great time to get his mind off of what he thought was going on. Meanwhile, you still hadn’t eaten and your stomach was now growling at you to feed it. You could get through the rest of the night without him, maybe it was for the best if you both had some distance from each other as much as you hated it. 

You thought you’d be okay, you were okay, you had made it to the kitchen, you had gotten the food out of the fridge, you had managed to even start preparing it, but then, as if from out of the dark, it kicked in again. This time it was worse, or maybe it just felt worse because everything else that was going on. It truly felt like your head had been slammed into a brick wall and your vision became blurry and you felt sick and everything was just awful and you couldn’t help but cry as you dropped down to the kitchen floor, your knees curling against your chest, your hand fumbling for your phone in your pocket as you called the only person you knew could help. 

“Look, I said that I’d leave. You said you wanted space. I don’t want to argue, I think we should just talk about this-” 

“B-Binnie…” You whimpered, sniffling loudly as your body trembled, trying not to throw up, trying so hard to not focus on the pain, but trying not to focus only made it hurt worse. His end was quiet though, aside from the distant murmuring of some of the guys, although you couldn’t make it out, especially considering you were breathing so heavily from crying, the only thing you could really hear was your own whimpers and sobs. “Please come home…” 

The sound of a car door, and then the revving of an engine. “I’m coming, sweetheart, just stay where you’re at. Where are you right now? What were you doing?” It was the Binnie that you knew and loved speaking right now, but it was so different from the Changbin that had sat across from you in the living room just a little while ago. Right now you couldn’t find it in yourself to care, you simply needed him there with you, his voice soft and sweet as he talked you through the pain. 

“Kitchen… I… I was hungry…” You stammered, and then you hiccuped, the sudden jolt seemingly shifting your stomach and causing you to retch. “S-Sorry…” You whispered, and you heard Changbin sigh softly, although you weren’t sure if it sounded that way because he pulled his phone away or if he was just trying to be quiet because he knew what was going on. 

“I’ll be home shortly, and then I’ll order us something to eat. You remember what we talked about the last time this happened and I wasn’t there? You remember what I told you to do?” He was trying his best to keep your mind off of the ache, and it was working in a way, your mind now trying to clear the fog to think about what you’d do if this happened while he was on tour. He’d sit on the phone with you for hours, and if he was in the middle of a show while it happened, he had set up his voicemail just for you so you could listen to his voice to help you a little bit until he could call you back. “Just listen to me talk and…-” 

“And take deep breaths…” You sputtered out, your breaths coming a little bit too quickly right now which wasn’t helping in the nausea department. “Count to ten…” You continued, squeezing your eyes shut as tightly as you could as you tried to visualize the numbers popping up in your head while listening to him talk. He wasn’t really talking about anything in particular, his voice was just something for you to focus on, something to calm you in a way. 

It wasn’t long… or maybe it was… until Changbin came walking through the front door. The entire apartment was pitch black, but he knew that flicking on any lights would only make things worse, so he used his phone screen to shine a light across the floor until he made it to the kitchen where you were still sitting curled up against the cabinets. “Did you take your medicine today?” He asked as he squatted down on the floor next to you, his hand wiping the beads of sweat from your forehead that you didn’t even notice had built up. 

Your medicine, which you often forgot to take, especially when you were in a hurry, had just now crossed your mind now that Changbin had brought it up. “No…” You mumbled sheepishly, and he tsked his tongue, but he wasn’t going to say anything about it right now. Instead, he helped you to your feet, but once you were on them, he gently lifted you up, carrying you to the bedroom and then carefully laying you down. 

“I don’t want you to take it now… You have to take it in the morning…” He whispered, and although the room was dark, you could tell he wasn’t looking at you because you couldn’t see the moon reflected in the whites of his eyes. “I’m sorry… For the way I acted. It was uncalled for, and I got jealous… Stupidly jealous. I just… I don’t like the idea of another guy taking care of you. It kind of pisses me off…” 

“Kind of?” You questioned, and you would have laughed if the situation didn’t feel so serious. “You walked out on me… That hurt, Binnie…” You softly explained as shortly as possible. “I’d like to think that I make it perfectly clear that I love you… Only you… You’re the only person I want to take care of me…” You reached out in the darkness, your hand brushing along his back where you could feel the outline of his muscles that you mapped with your fingertips. 

“You do… You do.” He repeated himself, running his hands over his face, and you felt him shiver slightly from your touch. “I know you love me… I know you feel that way… I just… I want to be the only person that takes care of you, the only person who looks out for you. Sometimes I feel like… Like since I’m gone so much… You’ll find someone else to take care of you like I should.” 

“Bin…” You sighed out his name, pushing yourself up onto your knees and draping your arms over his shoulders, burying your face in the crook of his neck and placing light kisses against his skin. “I don’t want anyone else to take care of me… You’re the only person that can calm me, that can soothe me. You’re the only one that can ever make me feel better. I don’t want anyone but you.” His silence let you know that he was thinking, and you didn’t want him thinking anything bad, so you pulled him to lay down, laying on top of him to trap him-although you knew he could move you if he wanted to-and pulling the blanket up around the both of you. 

“I’ll do better… I’ll be better…” He whispered, his fingers dancing along the small of your back. “I’m sorry I upset you… I’m so sorry, sweetheart…” He apologized again, placing a kiss to the top of your head before settling into his pillow again. “I’m not leaving again, I’ll stay right here with you, forever and ever.” 

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I so so so genuinely needed this, km flying back home and the trip has me become really sad and frustrated and i cant even cry, im so happy this popped up

what was i made for?

pairing: skz member x reader

warnings: angst, sad, feeling empty and hopeless

✿: @hhwangsmoon @straywrds @l3visbby @armysantiny @hwajin @casualtaelyn @staybangchan @hopeladybug @midsoulz @aestheticsluut @venustired @abiaswreck @reallyloudstarlight @deathlypink @djeniryuu @rachabreathing @alyszaen @starlostseungmin @bokk-minnie @spicymooseeyes @arlojulien-nightchild-of-hades @downbadreading @moasworld @ren0325 @ketchupaeternum

note: and not doing too good mentally and needed to write something comforting. ended up using youtiful and what was i made for as inspiration <3 wanted to write something where you could imagine the member of your choosing!! I hope despite the angst that you enjoy this one

Your disappearances don’t go unnoticed by him.

He sees the way your features fall when you think he’s not looking.

He sees the frown that tugs on your lips and the tears that well in your eyes before you quickly try to blink them away.

He hears the sighs you let out when you think he’s busy and can’t hear you.

Worst of all, he hears the muffled sniffles coming from the bathroom every time you excuse yourself.

He knows you’ll talk to him when you’re ready but he can only take so much of your red nose and blood shot eyes.

After your fourth time excusing yourself to the bathroom, he finds himself waiting only inches from the door for you to come out.

Five minutes pass. Ten minutes. Then another five.

He listens with a heavy heart as you sniffle, small gasps leaving you as you try to keep yourself quiet.

He feels his own eyes begin to sting.

You were suffering.

He knows you don’t want to burden him. That’s why you disappear. That’s why you smile brightly when you return—trying to convince the both of you that you’re alright and that things will be alright.

His knuckles rasp against the door, hearing a small gasp leave you.

“J-Just a minute.”

His chest clenches at the way your voice shakes.

“Take your time. But know that you don’t have to go through this alone,” he whispers.

Your silent for a moment.

“You don’t have to tell me what’s going on in that pretty head of yours. But let me at least be with you while you go through this.”

In the next moment the door unlocks.

Your glossy eyes meet his before a heart wrenching sob leaves you. He quickly takes you into his arms, burying his face into your neck as he holds you close.

Nothing hurts more that seeing his person in pain like this.

He continues to hold your body close to his as it wracks with your sobs.

“I just feel so empty,” you cry out against his chest.

He feels his own tears leave his eyes at the pain in your voice, tightening his hold on you.

“I feel—I don’t even know what I feel or what I’m doing. Why am I even here? W-What was I even made for?”

Every utterance from you broke his heart further. He knew that if he could take away your pain that he would in a heartbeat.

“Your life has a purpose Y/n. You’re here for a reason. It’s scary to feel that way, to feel hopeless and empty and like nothing is going according to plan. But know that I’ll always be by your side. I’ll stick with you through it all. You don’t have to do this alone.”

He cries with you this time. Crumbling with you to the floor as the two of you hold each other like your lives depend on it.

And maybe they do.

“I love you,” comes in a broken whisper but he catches it.

His fingers card gently through your hair, pulling you closer to him as he presses a kiss to your forehead.

“I love you. You mean so much to me. You’re amazing as you are and one day I know you’ll see it too. I’m certain that everything will work out for you my love. One day you will be happy,” he promises.

“Everything will be okay?”

He pulls away slightly, gently wiping away your tears as he presses a wet kiss to the tip of your nose.

“Everything will be okay.”

He was certain of it and once glance let him know that you were certain of it too.