LET ME JUST

LET ME JUST

꒰ THIS DECEMBER ꒱︙C.MATSUNO

all you wanted to present matsuno chifuyu for his birthday was your secret love confession, but he beats you to it before you could even utter the words.

꒰+꒱︙fluffy as fuck i’m not kidding, made butterflies in my stomach and my head. a birthday gift for my #1 boyfriend, love you chifuyu. two dorks in love. everybody who see this has to read it .

DECEMBER 18TH, 23:52

“crap, it’s raining,” your friend exclaimed in horror as he noticed droplets falling from the sky, which was already blanketed in dark clouds. as he hurriedly wore the shoes at the front entrance, chifuyu’s groans filled the cold air around you.

“gotta go now, thank you for letting me crash your place today.” before leaving, he completed slipping his feet into his shoes and double-checked his belongings.

“crashing into my house in the middle of the night like usual?”

“like usual…” his words drifted off as he realized he’d always been one to annoy you at odd hours, and today was one of them. when your halfhearted smile began to grow at the end of your lips, chifuyu uttered a tiny giggle.

before walking out the gate, he put on his sweater’s hood. “i’ll see you at school tomorrow, if i don’t decide to skip class again.” he chuckled as he smiled at you. that bashful and sheepish expression you always manage to capture at just the right moment.

you merely laughed at his antics, your hands waving goodbye as you walked slowly towards him.

“lastly, before i leave for real now, can i ask you a question?” chifuyu doesn’t want to say his last goodbye quite yet, so he attempts to divert his thoughts with other things. his eyes dart around everything except you, and his hands scrape the back of his neck. “have you planned any kind of gift?” perhaps for me?“

chifuyu’s instant remorse is amusing at the moment. how selfish, it sounds like this guy was expecting something from you when all he could do was fantasize about the possible outcomes.

do you think he’s unreasonable in expecting you to at least give him something? the only person who knows what he wants for his birthday is him. it’s a simple gift, but it’s so hard to get. he wants you. but maybe he’ll just let you down. but look at those eyes, he’s thinking too loud. chifuyu has to bide all the time until it feels right, and until you’re his alone.

“a gift for what?” you sarcastically flipped another question to him. “if i told you i was going to give you a present, it’d ruin the whole idea, stupid,” you hissed at his request and pushed him through the gates.

“fuyu, go home. it’s late, and it’s going to rain even more.”

“right, alright.” chifuyu has no idea what you want or what he’ll get, but a part of him is delighted that you put up the effort for his birthday. and he could taste it, for what he hoped would be a sweet beginning.

normally, when it rains, people run, but he strolled through the gate with calm, fearless steps, letting the raindrops wash him away as if it were nothing. “you’re walking so slowly, hurry up!” you exclaimed, letting out a long sigh.

nothing has changed as a result of your statement. perhaps he didn’t hear your shout to hasten his pace because of the heavy rain. he performed the exact opposite of what you expected him to do. chifuyu’s pace slowed even more until his legs remained motionless at the location where he halted, not taking another step or making any other movements.

“why are you just standing there, you jackass? run!” you scream one final time before allowing it to enter your nerves again.

five seconds later, he slowly turned his back to face you. you could only narrow your eyes as he murmured something beneath his breath that you didn’t catch due to the rain blocking up your ear.

he’s your typical chifuyu, but something has changed as of today. you can’t figure out why he’s being so bright around you and smiling an abnormal amount in a short time.

chifuyu’s head was tilting all over the place, looking for something to attract his interest in the midst of the rain while licking his lips or staring down at his feet and kicking rocks that were nearby. hands nuzzled inside his now-wet pockets, his body swinging from left to right before he looked you in the eye from afar, that wide grin formed once more. who would have guessed that someone like him, with his wide grin, would come along and push you through?

and when you tried to take another deep breath in order to yell at him again, he beat you to it. his piercing scream could be heard from afar. "before i go out for the last time today, i need to tell you something,” he took another big breath and quickly removed his hood, his blond hair saturated in water after standing there for so long. “it’s going to seem really selfish coming out of me, so please bare with me,” he said, not knowing how he changed his mind so abruptly. these following few exact scenes have been repeated in his thoughts a million times, believing he wouldn’t be able to reach for it and would have to settle for fake beautiful memories.

all this time there’s so much time for him to speak up, but he kept quiet. he kept it all to himself until he thinks the time is right. but there isn’t any right timing when all he did was denying these feelings when all he wanted just for you to be around. that’s it, he is sorry but he isn’t giving up now.

“i want to tell you why i love you,”

you didn’t hear a single word he yelled, which was embarrassing. instead of responding to his confession, you called him out again, saying, “chifuyu, it’s raining! you know that, right?”

he sighed, his breath already mingling with the frigid air, not the response he had hoped for. so he yelled another confession, this time it echoed in your ear.

‘im in love with you,”

“oi, you heard me?”

you are now the one who is silent; no words can be said after hearing his confession. he was thinking the same thing you were thinking all along. there isn’t a day that goes by when you don’t fantasize about finally telling your hidden little crush. you kept it to yourself until his birthday arrived.

your love declaration to him was supposed to be a birthday present for him. however, this is no longer the case.

he took a few steps in your direction and yelled, followed by a second scream. with his final words, “i know what love is, and i know that we’re all destined to the abyss,” chifuyu said haltingly.

“but even so, i’m love with you, i do.”

he closed his statement with the biggest and most illuminating grin you’ve ever seen written on his face. finally, he is gaining complete control of his bliss, and it is unstoppable.

ten seconds of stillness, looking at one another, with just the sound of rain striking any form of surface. he turned his back again and walked away from you as if he hadn’t just confessed such a thing.

you chased him down; there’s no way you’re letting him leave without an answer. the sound of splashing puddles close to him compelled him to turn his head. there he spotted you rushing after him, also fighting the torrential rain. "hey, don’t come here or you’ll get soaked.”

“you moron, you’re the one who’s soaking wet,” you retorted.

another wave of tension between you two, with just your eyes linked like magnets on each other. chifuyu felt connected to you, or maybe not since you haven’t answered his confession, who knows.

“i don’t know what to say,” you never took your gaze away from him, and he didn’t move an inch away from you.

“you don’t have to say anything, i just want to get it off my chest,” he said.

“i’m in love with you, sorry,” his voice was clear, and even the sounds of rainfall on it didn’t sway it. everything you thought he was, he was exactly the proper type. and you were more than a fantasy for chifuyu.

“do you know what your birthday present was supposed to be?” you questioned him, and he shook his head from left to right a few times. “i was planning on confessing to you, but you beat me to it,”

is he hallucinating or has he arrived in paradise? he hasn’t felt better in a long time. everything was surreal, and he is worried because he can’t afford to feel the way you make him feel.

“so i need to change my plans,”

you snatched his sweater with a hard hold of your palm in a brief second, allowing your lips to melt together. in the midst of the downpour, you surprised him with a kiss and an affirmative response, which happened to be your change of birthday gift for him. chifuyu understood that you were the answer to the question that he has been asking all this time.

and if the sky falls from heaven above, chifuyu matsuno will know he had a wonderful experience falling in love.

“happy birthday, chifuyu.”

DECEMBER 19TH, 00:04

꒰+꒱︙@gem1nis for always sharing her ideas ALSO beta reading this piece! @blondbirb @chosos-angel

MQTSUNO. 2021 — reblogs are highly appreciated.

AN AMBULANCE CAN SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME AN AMBULANCEEEENNRLEMFMF

i...s-save..d-di....by...gi..ving...c-..c-cpr...

source : @/roxycoox on twt

mikey acts like a hard ass but when he gets a text from you with a nude attached he has to silently scream into the pillow multiple times before even responding

I'D LIKE TO SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHIFUYU ILYSM <33333

i like to imagine, that in a perfect world, chifuyu and baji would be sitting on a rooftop wearing party hats eating peyoung yakisoba and just talking about random stuff- just being normal teens enjoying life

i'm sobbing again...

I FUCKKNF FELL TO THE BGROUND

Look at him, look at this beef fine ass man oh my lord I swear I'm not feeling ok I need to touch grass jeez

♡ <- Artist's Twitter account

don't touch me i'm down bad rn

Okay but thinking of comforting yuji makes me so soft. Like he would be all distraught and immediately would feel comfortable and safe enough with you. To finally give sweet sunshine boy a place to talk and vent HE DESERVES IT😭💕 I just want him to be safe and loved in this essay I-

Omg what are you doing to me? Poor baby Yuuji! It breaks my heart anytime I see him suffering and blaming himself. Ok, imagine:

Yuuji comes back from his mission, and you can tell immediately that something is very wrong. Your heart clenches painfully when you see him staring off into space, lost in his thoughts, the usual sparkle in his honey eyes missing. And the worst thing is that Yuuji is hugging himself. He's standing there, holding himself looking so lonely and broken, and it's just not fair that someone as kind and selfless as him is looking so lost.

You quickly abandon what you are doing to cross the room until you're standing in front of him. He was so lost in his own mind that he didn't even see you until now. But now he's looking at you, with a haunted expression on his pretty face, eyes silently begging you to do something.

"Yuu, what's wrong?"

He isn't even able to say anything, but you see his eyes becoming shiny with tears, and that's when you reach out and wrap your arms around him.

You feel him melt against you instantly, his arms coming around you too, and he's clinging to you desperately as if you are his lifeline.

You hold him tightly, stroking his back in soothing circles and whispering to him that it's ok. You feel some of the tension leaving him as he slumps against you, almost making you fall because he's so heavy. But he needs this, needs you and the comfort your embrace brings, and you give it to him willingly.

It's heartbreaking because Yuuji buries his face into the crook of your neck, and you hear a pained sob and feel his hot tears against your skin.

He mumbles into your neck, tells you about what happened on the mission. "I had to... I killed them... I can't take this anymore, all the pain and the death. It's not right. All of those bad things happen because of me."

"It isn't your fault, Yuuji. You aren't a murderer. You did what you had to do. You did it to protect someone else, right?"

You keep on reassuring him and petting his hair and holding him until he's calmed down enough to look at you and ask you:

"Do you really think I'm a good person?"

"Of course you are. You are the best person I know. You're so kind and always put others first. I know that you would never hurt anyone who didn't deserve it. And you always do your best to save others."

You can see the light coming back to his eyes before he pulls you into another embrace, holding you so tightly that it's hard for you to breathe. But it's ok because Yuuji is feeling better and you are glad that you can help him.

He doesn't want to let go of you the whole evening, and he doesn't have to. So you make sure to spend a lazy evening with him in bed where you re-watch his favorite movies. Only funny ones, though, so he won't get sad again!

Yuuji snuggles against you, resting his head on your chest and sighing happily when you run your fingers through his soft pink hair and keep telling him how sweet he is and how kind and brave and just so so good.

You give him all the reassurance and comfort that he needs. You show him that he is worthy of love and affection. Because that's something, Yuuji can't quite grasp. But you are making it your top priority to always make him feel loved and safe, and you can tell that it's working by the way Yuuji is smiling his sunshine smile again and doing his stupid little impersonations of the characters on the tv screen.

Later that night, when you are both about to fall asleep, cuddled up comfortably with Yuuji's head tugged under your chin and your arms wrapped safely around him, Yuuji quietly thanks you for being there for him. And he knows that you'll be here all night even when the nightmares come to haunt him. You will be there to hold him and kiss him and make him feel loved, and that gives him such a warm feeling.